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April 30, 2008 |

By Seth Freilich | Industry | April 30, 2008 |

God bless VH1. The former music network is taking some of its “best” reality series to the next level by moving from celebreality to full-on realitytard. “I Love Money” will feature contestants from “Flavor of Love,” “I Love New York” and “Rock of Love” competing for cash money. So the pretense and subterfuge that these celebrity seeking whores are “looking for love” has finally been burnt away, revealing the contestants’ crispy, black, money-and-fame-grubbing soul. Yes, this show will be a turd, but it will be a finely-polished turd lovingly wrapped in a basket made from umbilical cords. Huzzah!

In even worse news, CBS has decided that what the world needs now is not love sweet love, but a crossover between “Two and a Half Men” and “CSI.” I shit you not. The shows are doing a “writer’s crossover,” with the May 5 episode of “Two and a Half Men” being written by “CSI” scribes, and vice-versa with “CSI’s” May 8 episode. The “Two and a Half Men” episode will feature a CSI team that’s called to investigate a death at Charlie Sheen’s house. And Jenny McCarthy is guest starring! The shit rolls downhill three days later when the “CSI” gang investigates the death of a sitcom star (at least they got legitimate guest stars in Katey Sagal and Rachael Harris). This is why the writers wanted their strike over — so they could write somebody else’s crap instead of their own crap?

Speaking of crap, in a surprising turn of events I am now desperately hoping that “Cashmere Mafia” is renewed. I don’t really know anything about the show and don’t particularly care to. But I do know this — Lucy Liu is on it. And if the show isn’t picked up, ABC is in talks to keep her on the network by adding her to the cast of “Dirty Sexy Money.” And damn it, I kinda enjoy that show. And I kinda don’t like Liu. So come on, whoever’s watching “Cashmere Mafie” — watch harder!

Some Rob Thomas has started to put the cast together for “Good Behavior,” his non-“Cupid” ABC pilot. Mae Whitman (EggAnne from “Arrested Development”) is onboard as the daughter of the criminal-family-going-straight, and Patrick Adams (whodat?) will be playing her twin brothers. And speaking of ABC pilots, Nathan Fillion has himself one too. Unfortunately, it’s “Castle,” where he’ll play a mystery book writer who helps the NYPD. Captain Mal, oh where oh where are you?

And while I won’t be watching “Castle” on ABC, I will be tuning in to the Peacock for the final season of “Scrubs,” which NBC has passed on. In the worst kept secret of this TV year, ABC is expected to announce its pickup of the Sacred Heart crew during the upcoming upfronts, with an order of up to 18 episodes. Yes, the show has waned in recent years, but it’s still gives me a laugh or two an episode, which is a better track record than most shows and, at this point, I’ll watch it to the bitter end.

Lastly, the cast is also coming together for Thomas’ other show, “Beverly Hills OU812,” or whatever it shall be called (although Thomas’ involvement beyond being a named exec-producer is now pretty limited). Lori Loughlin is on board as the mother of the family what moves to Beverly Hills (i.e., the modern-day equivalent of Carol Potter’s Cindy Walsh). The show also recently signed AnnaLynne McCord (“Nip/Tuck”) as a chick who mixes it up with the Brenda and Brandon of the show, and some whodat names I don’t recognize. But the latest casting news is another “Arrested Development” alum, this time in the form of Jessica Walter. Walter will play a drunkard former actress who is the mother to the Jim Walsh character and the apparent impetus for our modern day Walshes moving from wherever to the BH (odds on the phrase “the BH” showing up sarcastically in the pilot? Vegas has taken it off the board!). We all know Walsh can play the drunkard for all the comedic gold that’s possible, so here’s hoping we get a return of Mother Bluth.

Normally, I like to end with a video for you. But I often don’t find anything worthwhile. Such is this week. However, I’ve got a kick-ass photo for you. This has nothing to do with TV, but given that the comments often diverge to the topic of comics or body ink, I thought many would appreciate this great tattoo picture I stumbled upon over the weekend:


Seth Freilich is Pajiba’s television editor. That mother fucking Meatloaf AT&T GoPhone commercial has become the absolute and utter bane of his existence.

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April 30, 2008

Industry | April 30, 2008 |

Seth is a Senior Editor and sometime critic. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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