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December 9, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | December 9, 2008 |

Imagine your favorite band is coming to town. But the opening act is someone like Crazy Town or Hannah Montana or someone else you loathe. But you can get fourth row tickets! But you have to go with your brother’s racist friend who’ll get fucked up on whippets and you’ll have to babysit through the show. How do you cope with alternating waves of sheer ecstasy and disappointment?

Bill Willingham’s Fables comic book series is not just getting developed for our viewing pleasure, but it’s going to be a miniseries of hour-long episodes. Fables takes all of our popular fairy tales and myths and legends and gives them the modern twist. Storytown was raided by a mysterious force called The Adversary, and so the fables left and moved to New York, where they’ve been hiding out and attempting to blend in for hundreds of years. Prince Charming is a gadfly womanizer, Bigby Wolf (Big Bad Wolf for the slow kids) is the sheriff, with a McNulty vibe and a Wolverine haircut, Goldilocks is a counterrevolutionary terrorist. You know, for KIDS!

While I’m so glad they finally figured out that most graphic novels require the long form treatment, the news comes with a few left handed jabs. Yes, it’s a miniseries, but it’s going to be on ABC. And while the series doesn’t rely entirely on graphic sex and violence to give you clit wood, those elements are going to get washed out and Disneyfied.

The writers for the project are Stu Zicherman and Raven Metzner. Aside from doing “Six Degrees” (you heard of it? neither have I) and “What About Brian,” their other noted credit for writing is … Elektra. And the collected Children of the Corn/Body Snatcher shriek goes up from the collected forces of darkness.

The director is David Semel, who’s a veritable teeter-totter of elation and depression. Semel directed “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” (TV) and “Beverly Hills 91210,” “Dawson’s Creek” and “Roswell,” “House” and “Heroes.”

I’m banking on this potentially working, albeit flawed. They have yet to work on casting of the big parts like Bigby, Snow White, Charming. But based on the network, and the director’s pedigree, Hegel’s going to end up in this somewhere. I hope to Squidward this finally breaks her curse. Then again, if Semel didn’t burn bridges, we might have a shot at some Buffy crew returning. Seth Green as Flycatcher? David Boreanaz as Bigby?

Bibbity-Bobbity-BOOO! / Brian Prisco

Industry | December 9, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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