Pajiba

I just read David Cross' blog entry, and he didn't mention Jason Lee in the same line as Jim Breuer and the rest....so was it edited after it was copied here?

It appears that it was. He replaced the Jason Lee line with an ellipsis. Interesting. I wonder if Jason Lee complained? Was offended? -- DR

If 'Shoot 'em Up' hadn't had the headliners to end all headliners, it would have been excruciating. The dialogue was so unforgivably bad... but Owen and Giametti were so good.

Clive Owen should be required by law to be in at least one action film per year.

Wait - Tyler Perry as Uhura? Is it possible? Could it be? Should I just put myself out of my misery now and save the trouble of having to do it in the theatre when the trailer debuts?

Upstate New York does suck (Hi from Albany!). David Cross sound like he'll fit in perfectly.

My nerd-love for Simon Pegg is so strong that I'll probably go and see the new Star Trek movie purely because he's in it, despite apparently being about the only person on Earth who has previously never given two shits about Star Trek in any of its many and various permutations.

Thanks for the Clive Owen clip because I was not going to rent that movie. The thing I find funny is a) She's wearing tap pants or something while they are making love, and b) that he can pay attention to ANYTHING other than making love. If I so much make a comment during lovemaking, darling hubby has to stop and then ask "What?" because apparently he can't hear, move, think or talk at the same time. Ah movies, such fantasy.

I saw a trailer for Leatherheads when I went to see Charlie Wilson's War on Sunday. The thought of Misters Clooney and Krasinski fighting over her creepiness is strange - but the rest of the movie does look cool.

I don't like football at all and even I think Leatherheads is going to be an enjoyable film.

I blame George Clooney and the swingin' big band music music from the trailor.

Please make Tyler Perry a redshirt, PLEASE make Tyler Perry a redshirt....or at least a Klingon. Kolby, do not fear. Zoe Saldana was already cast as Uhura, so that role is safe from his hands. For now.

I also grant Cross a reprieve for that wonderful testimony. Mostly because he skewers those who turned on him so quickly because of this one role. Sometimes a motherfucker has bills to pay (or a house to buy) and some jackass won't accept "I blue myself" as currency. I totally would, but that's me.

BWeaves, maybe Clive Owen is just that manly and awesome, that he can have Monica Bellucci literally hanging on his Peacemaker and kill a bunch of goons at the same time. Or she could be a lousy lay, but I refuse to believe that about any woman that looks like Monica. If the sex sucks, youa ren't trying hard enough. And I think that was a ridden-up skirt she was wearing. How else was he able to pull her panties off earlier? Note that I say this having no idea what tap pants are, but just going on the "pants" part of the term.

Re Cross deletion of comment about Jason Lee: One of two things happened. Either (a) the Church of Scientology threatened Cross's life for dissing a member or (b) his Alvin contract has a clause precluding derogatory comments about the film, including its "star." My money is on the latter, but the former is an attractive idea, given the Church's habitual fascist reactions toward detractors.

New Masthead! I love it! I miss Firefly, but the tree of Pajiba must occasionally be nourished with the blood of worthy art. Or something.

Damn, Steve the Penguin is back-ordered. I called Amazon to complain, and they said only one copy had been printed in anticipation of demand.

A bunch of haters, Pajiba has officially turned into hater central.

In truth, the ONLY reason I was going to rent Shoot "Em Up was to see the fucking/shooting scene....but in good conscience, I suppose I will still put it in the queue if for no other reason than the ability to stop-motion on Clive's ass.

I just wonder if Simon Pegg got all chunky again for the Scotty role... seems like it would be weird if he hadn't.

I can't view the sex/shooting scene at work (I mean, I literally cannot b/c it's blocked) but I would just like to state for the record that Clive Owen makes my naughty parts tingle. I will be renting the movie for that alone.

Honestly, as long as Tyler Perry isn't Uhura, I can't see myself really caring that much. Simon Pegg and Zoe Saldana (I've her loved since Center Stage, don't judge me) more than balance it out. There's always the chance that he'll die a painful death!

Also, I'm sure that legions of brainless teenage girls will flock to see the kickboxing movie, because it has loud music and attractive young men. I'd like to apologize in advance on behalf of that demographic for whatever money the film makes.

Accusations of actors selling out are ridiculous. Acting is a job, not a social institution for the betterment of mankind. Not some laudable saintly labour A job. You know, that thing people do for money. This bizarre reverence for acting is a modern conceit.
I once again call to your mind's eyes the image of Samuel Jackson with a beret perched arrogantly on his shining pate, fingers steepled, talking about the freaking /craft/.
David Cross is awesome. He knows what he's about and I admire the man for it.

Frothy Walrus: OK, point taken. Clive was fucking and not making love. But come on, she's wearing a slip dress that could have fallen off her, and yet somehow she's still wearing it? He had to take all his clothing off, and that invoved zippers and feet in the way. By the way, tap pants are those things they used to wear in the twenties. High waisted, loose legged, silky underpants that looked like mini skirts. The only reason I said tap pants, as opposed to her having her dress around her waist, was because they were fucking and you couldn't see any of her anatomy. Oh, and I'd like to add a C) he could walk with a 130 lb woman breaking his penis and shooting accurately at the same time, while the multiple assasins managed to repeatedly miss a double sized slowly moving chunk of nekkid bodies.

THANK YOU Vermillion for debunking Tyler Perry as Uhuru and ending my frantic "say it ain't so" scrolldown.

Also props to Manny for further info.

amea_gari is right. It is a job, and sometimes they gotta do stuff they don't want to. If they didn't, it wouldn't be a job. Plus, considering how much bemoaning there is about the decline in quality fare from Hollywood, it is kinda inevitable that some decent actors (Cross, Honsou) will end up in some crappy projects.

By the way, where is this Jackson clip from, exactly? I can't say I have seen it, and until I do, I have a hard time believing the guy who willingly dived into "Snakes on a Plane" takes himself seriously enough to be the poster boy for thespian arrogance.

Shoot Em Up was such a fun movie, although my female friends didn't seem to think so. Every time the guys and I laughed at something, they were groaning. I think they were trying to take it seriously, which, as the above clip illustrates, you probably shouldn't do if you want to enjoy the movie.

I was mildly interested in the new Star Trek movie when I heard Zachary Quinto was attached to it, and will definitely watch it now that Simon's on the roster. Love that man!! My fingers are crossed that Tyler Perry is cast as Redshirt #2.

I meant Crank. I ruined my own joke. Goddamnit.

Simon Pegg shouldn't have to "bulk up" for Scotty's role -- In the first season our erstwhile Chief Engineer was every bit as slim and trim as Kirk. Pity about Tyler Perry, though -- how does one confuse Trekkie and Madea demographics?

Okay, had to stop reading as soon as I read that Tyler Fuckin' Perry was attached to Star Trek.

That there is some absolute motherfuckery.

I enjoy Star Trek, not a hardcore Trekkie, but I enjoy it. I don't want to see him as Uhura, I don't want to see him at all in it.

Does Abrams not want me to see this film? Cause putting Perry in it will have me run screaming from any screen that plays it.

Sorry if I have repeated what everyone else has said already - but I hate me some Tyler Perry.
And I am a black woman. So drink up Pajibites playing the drinking game.

Rant over.

Alex would like to comment but she is obsessively re watching the Shoot 'Em Up clip for the seventy fourth time and so cannot.

OK, I'm back.

The casting of Tyler Perry in Star Trek makes my soul sad. I've managed so far to have never seen a production starring the man and I really didn't want to break that trend. It was one of my New Year's resolutions: avoid overacting headcases who are primarily famous for wearing any item of clothing which incorporates latex padding.

OK.... re watch number seventy five comin' up.

David Cross seems like a complete asshole in real life.

And, frankly, Jason Lee is a lot funnier than him.

Star Trek: Romantic Adventures of Emo Kirk, aka Brokeback Enterprise: Melding of the Ensigns will suck huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge amounts of ass. Roddenberry must be spinning in his grave at Warp 9.

Roddenberry must be spinning in his grave at Warp 9.

Oh I dunno, he was at least partly in it for the $$ from the very beginning and this most recent addition to the franchise is nothing but an obvious grab on Paramont-Viacom-Whoever's part for more money from something that should have been put to rest before Enterprise ever hit the airwaves.

The movie will probably suck rocks and make a decent amount of money. Sadly some of that money will come from me; fandom's like a frikkn' disease.

Shoot 'em Up was the most preposterous bag of unadulterated fun i have ever watched. obviously, you have to not just suspend your disbelief, but actually shove it down the garburator to watch this movie. smoking a big joint also helps. but in terms of how good it is, let me remind you of Dustin's original review (i put the best parts in italics):

The film opens with a long shot of a loner, Smith (Owen), sitting in a park bench, minding his own business, chomping on a taproot when a pregnant lady stumbles by fleeing from a gunman. Misanthropic drifter though he is, Smith takes the bait and follows them into a warehouse, where unholy numbers of bullets are fired, the dead fall in waves, and before the all is said and done, Smith has jammed a carrot through the back of man's head, delivered a baby, severed the umbilical cord with firepower, and escaped with the newborn, leaving behind a dead mom. He then tracks down a lactating hooker (Bellucci), who tags along on the journey, as the rest of the film is spent mostly running and gunning, including one of the most preposterously breathtaking scenes in the history of film, in which Owen and Bellucci fornicate while simultaneously blowing a number of stormtrooping hitmen away. The main follower is Hertz (Giamatti), who is after the baby for political reasons that don't make a lot of sense and that don't really matter that much in the end -- token motive and narrative only existing to get you from dazzling gunfight to gunfight, anyway.

a-a-amen, brother!

Although it still doesn't explain how she manages to keep her dress pulled down over her nether regions during the entire fornication scene.

While I have always been perplexed by the squinting, I think Renee is a pretty good actress. Then again, I think Matt Damon and his chiclets are damn mediocre, so I'm all screwed up.

Regarding Tyler Perry:
Mix of emotions here - indifference because I never gave a damn about Star Trek and still don't, piqued interest because, in what seems to be a rare move, a black man isn't cast as an alien or villain in a sci-fi film, and "what the fuck"-ness because....really? Tyler Perry? No, he's not awful when he's not crossdressing, but of course not - he writes the damn scripts. Nevertheless, that news is as "out of left field" as you can get.

Clive Owen - saw a younger version of him in a movie yesterday. Let me tell you - he's one of the fortunate men who has grown into his looks. 1990 Owen? Not so hot. Current Owen? Orgasmic. He's definitely a fine wine.