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October 16, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | October 16, 2008 |

I’ve made little secret of my unyielding fondness for Cameron Crowe, even though he’s been much maligned since Vanilla Sky, an underappreciated flick, and Elizabethtown, a bad film with an awesome soundtrack. But the man is, if not my favorite, then one of my favorite directors of all time and any news I hear about him is worth reporting. A few months ago, in fact, we reported about the Untitled Cameron Crowe Project, which had no details but for the fact that Ben Stiller and Reese Witherspoon were starring (you’re killing me, Crowe. Killing me!).

Well, Gone Elsewhere (via Slashfilm) has gotten their hands on the super-duper top secret script, and they’ve got details. And those details are depressing as hell. I hope to hell the movie is better than the description they offer, but if it’s not, I may just weep Lloyd Dobler tears. Here’s how they described the film, a “tropical romantic adventure comedy with light sci-fi and heavy supernatural aspects”:

Brian Gilcrest [Ben Stiller], 37, is a military contractor for the US Army. He hasn’t done many things right in life. He’s married the wrong women, broke up with the only good one and most people don’t like him. His only friend is a military techie named Jeremy who lives in the caves of the Cheyenne Mountains who he’s only spoken with on the phone. Brian is an angry man, but he learns that this doesn’t bother him. He’s just relieved that he doesn’t have to pretend to be anything else. Unfortunately, this has also killed his career. However, Gilcrest soon gets a shot at redemption thanks to escalating tensions between the United States and China. The military needs him to set up the launch of a private satellite at his old stomping grounds in Hawaii. There, Gilcrest gets a chance to meet up with “the one who got away,” Tracy [Witherspoon], her kids and her new husband. He also meets the designated liaison officer for the mission, Major Lisa Ng. Together these two must secure the blessings of the native Hawaiian council and see that the launch happens on schedule. If only they weren’t haunted by visions of Hawaiian ghosts in green mists, mistaken for incarnations of the Hawaiian gods Lono and Pele, and prophesied to bring about the Arrival.

The good news is that the guys who read the script actually liked it. But, man: haunted by visions of Hawaiian ghosts in green mists, mistaken for incarnations of the Hawaiian gods Lono and Pele, and prophesied to bring about the Arrival?! That description made my stomach lurch, made my heart fall into my knees and spew. Really? I’m gonna keep a brave face, Cameron. I have faith in you, brother. Please God, pleasegod don’t disappoint.

In the meantime, I’ll just watch this clip, and remember how fucking phenomenal Cameron Crowe can be:

Oh, Cameron. What Have You Done? / Dustin Rowles

Industry | October 16, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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