Pajiba

Yeah, Book of Shadows isn't a bog standard first-book Wiccan term or anything.

Murdered by pirates is good.

"I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for people to die embarrassed."

'What I wouldn't give for a holocaust cloak.'

'Will this do?' [whips out cloak]

'Where did you get that?'

'At Miracle Max's. It fit so nice, he said I could keep it.'

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

NUFF SAID

Life IS pain, highness. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something.

"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line."

"Who are you?"
"No one of consequence."

"We are men of honor. Lies do not become us."

"What about the ROUSs?"
"Rodents Of Unusual Size? I don't think they exist."
GGRRRRRRWWWWARRRRRR

Book Of Shadows was the name of that Blair Witch sequel, wasn't it?

Boo. Boo. Boo.

AS YOU WIIIIIIIISH!

Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam...

Hola. Mi noombre es Iñigo Montoya. Tú mataste a mi padre. Prepárate a morir.

or

Hello. My name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

One more time:

Hello. My name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

One more time, with feeling!

Hello. My name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Now in all caps!

HELLO. MY NAME IS IÑIGO MONTOYA. YOU KILLED MY FATHER. PREPARE TO DIE!!!!

That felt awesome for some reason.

"There's not a lot of money in revenge" - so true

"get used to dissapointment"
"ok"

"It ends when we both drink, and find out who is right and who is dead" - Good way to start drinking games

"Witch!"
"I'm not a witch, I'm your wife!"

"It's possible, Pig, I might be bluffing. It's conceivable, you miserable, vomitous mass, that I'm only lying here because I lack the strength to stand. But, then again... perhaps I have the strength after all."

Also:

"Offer me money!"

"Yes!"

"Power too. Promise me that."

"All that I have and more."

"Offer me anything I ask for!"

"Anything you want!"

"I want my father back you son of a bitch!"

"Princess Bride" has to be the most quoted movie of all time. "A Christmas Story" and "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" are close runners-up.

However, I want to talk about the pitch for "Book of Shadows:"

"The story follows a young man who must embark on the perilous journey of first love and face many trials of maturity while on the dangerous quest to close a mythical tome called "Book of Shadows" in order to restore balance to the world. "

This sounds like the kid from "The Neverending Story" has to go on a bunch of blind dates.

Peter Falk, "Ah, no, they're kissing again."

Actually , it's "Jesus, grampa, what did you read me this thing for??"

And Mine:

"As I told you, that would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways, inconceivable! Nobody in Guilder knows what we've done, and no-one in Florin could have gotten here so fast! ...Out of curiosity, why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason. It's only, I happened to look behind us and somezing is there."

And:

"You miserable, vomitous mass."

"You mocked me once, never do it again! I DIED THAT DAY!"

Humperdink: Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work. But I have my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wife to murder and Guilder to blame for it. I'm swamped.

"Skip on the the Fire Swamp, that sounded cool"
"You're sick, I'll yoomah (humor) ya"

I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here, but the trees are actually quite lovely.

You know what was so great about this movie? It did NOT riff on any other movie or story. I can't stand it anymore how every kiddie fairy tale does bad satire on other movies. Kids see the satire before they ever see the original stories, and that's sad (Shrek, Enchanted, Scary Fill-in-the-blank, I'm talking to you). This was at least a totally original story, with real fencing.

"You have six fingers on your right hand. I know someone who's looking for you."

BONK!

"You have six fingers on your right hand. I know someone who's looking for you."

BONK!

"If only we had a wheelbarrow, that would be something!"

"Ha! Your pig fiance is too late! Another few steps and we'll be safe in the fire swamp"

"We'll never survive it!"

"Nonsense, you only say that because no one ever has."

Previous Dred Pirate Roberts: "Good work today, Wesley, I shall most likely kill you in the morning."

Priest: "Have you the wings?"
Humperdink: "Man and wife. Say man and wife!"

(Buttercup kisses the King.)
King: "What was that for?"
Buttercup: "You've been so kind to me, and I won't be seeing you again, since I'll be killing myself as soon as we reach the honeymoon suite."
King: "Won't that be nice. She kissed me!"

You know what that sound is Highness? Those are the shrieking eels!

Ah, the sot has spoken! What happens to her is truly none of your concern. I will kill her. And remember this, Never forget this! When I found you, you were slobbering drunk you couldn't buy brandy! And you! Friendless. Worthless! Hopeless! Do you want me to send you back to where you were? Unemployed, in Greenland?

DROP.... YOUR.... SWORD

Prince Humperdinck: First things first, to the death.

Westley: No. To the pain.

Prince Humperdinck: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.

Westley: I'll explain and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon.

Prince Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me.

Westley: It won't be the last. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose.

Prince Humperdinck: And then my tongue I suppose, I killed you too quickly the last time. A mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight.

Westley: I wasn't finished. The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right.

Prince Humperdinck: And then my ears, I understand let's get on with it.

Westley: WRONG. Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God! What is that thing," will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.

Yeah, I'm a geek.

Innigo: Are you Miracle Max, who worked for the king all those years ago?

M.M.: The king's stinkin' son fired me. And thank you so much for bringing up such a painful memory. Now, why don't you give me a papercut and pour lemon juice all over it!? We're closed!

I think the Eloquents just remade The Princess Bride.

The Princess Bride - In My Pants

Did anyone read the book? It was ten times funnier than the movie. Not to say that the film isn't great (I just got very very happy reading everyone's favorite quotes) but the book literally had me laughing out loud.

" . . . you hippopotamic land mass!"

dene chen, I did, and I loved it deeply. And yes, it is even much funnier than the movie, which is also hilarious.

Man, I love me some commas today.

Sorry, Helen.

Count Rugen: And remember, this is for posterity's sake, so be honest.

Westley: [weeping]

He was poor, poor and perfect.
He had eyes like the sea after a storm

My ex boyfriend has eyes like the sea after a storm. And a lying cheating heart. I'm not bitter

Oh yes, I've read the book. Both wonderful for different reasons. Of course, then you get the people who ask in all earnestness:

"Have you read the unabridged version? I can't find it anywhere."

..."Um, actually, there is no unabridged version."

"Sure there is. Goldman adapted his book from another one that was, like, insanely long."

..."Um, I'm pretty sure that was part of the joke of the book. Did you ever read the first chapter of Buttercup's..."

"NO, Donna, it says RIGHT there in the book that he cut pages from the original about a tree."

"Ok, but...you know what? Never mind."

"I give you my word as a Spainiard."

"I've known too many Spainairds"

"Oh my sweet Westley, what have I done?" *throws self down hill* Ouch ow! Oof!

"A nice mutton lettuce and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean."

I LOVE the book. Love it. Shit, I need to reread it, it's been at least 6 years.

I love that no one can let go of the meathead thing. Rob Reiner once said that he could win the Nobel prize and the headlines would read, "Meathead Wins Nobel Prize."

I know it's way cheesy, but one of my favorite lines (that hasn't, I believe, yet been mentioned):

"Can you move at all?"
"Move? You're alive. If you want, I could fly."

God I love this movie.

V.

Miracle Max: I never worked for so little. Except once, and that was a very noble cause.
Inigo: This is noble, sir. His wife is...crippled. His children...on the brink of starvation.
Max: Are you a rotten liar.
Inigo: I need him to help avenge my father, murdered these twenty years.
Max: Your first story was better.

Miracle Max: Wait, wait, wait. I make him better, Humperdinck suffers?
Inigo: Humiliations galoooore.
Max: Now that is a noble cause! Gimme the sixty-five, I'm on the job!

"There is no greater hunter than Prince Humperdinck. He could track a falcon on a cloudy day. He will find you."

"Your cruelty reveals everything. You are the Dread Pirate Roberts, admit it!"
"With pride. What can I do for you?"
"You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces."
I loooooove this movie.
http://mollyringwraith.livejournal.com/44608.html
That link leads to what is easily the greates creative writing ever published.

Is this a kissing book?!

i say,"WHEN DEATH IS ON THE LINE ha ha hahahhhahha"

didnt rob direct a few good men, probably a little antiquated now, but i recall not minding watching again and again by my lonsome back in the ... 90's? i guess.

I will never love again.

Inigo: I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand, do you?

Man in Black: Do you always begin conversations this way?

Westley: "Where am I?"
Albino: "THE PIT OF DESPAIR! DON'T EVEN THI- *hackcoughgaspcoughcough* *clears throat* Don't even think about tryin' to escape."

Old woman: "BOOOOO! BOOOOO! BOOOOOO!"
Buttercup: "Why do you do this?"
Old woman: "Because you had true love in your hands and you gave it up. Her true love lives and she marries another! "
Buttercup: "But they would have killed Westley if I hadn't done it!"
Old woman: "True love saved her in the Fire Swamp, and she treated it like garbage. And that's what she is, the Queen of Refuse. So bow down to her, bow down. Bow to the Queen of Slime, the Queen of Filth, the Queen of Putrescence!"

Buttcup: "But Westley, what about the R.O.U.S.es?"
Westley: "Rodents of unusual size? I don't believe they exist."
WHAM!

"Have fun storming the castle"

He'll never catch up to us now--see! The Cliffs of Insanity!

Throw me the thing! ...and that other thing!

Inigo: ...I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Westley: That does put a damper on our relationship.

Fezzik: It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercise.

Westley: DROP...YOUR...SWORD!

I know its above, but its my favorite quote:

"You seem a decent fellow, I hate to kill you"
"You seem a decent fellow, I hate do die."

love, love, love this post.

i don't know if there are any quotes left!

gotta watch this again....such a classic.

Move...the thing...and...the other thing!

Hah! I remember one that hasn't been said yet!

Don't pester him! He's been mostly dead all day.

If you're a fan of the Princess Bride, check out the video game at http://www.princessbridegame.com.