Pajiba

You evil man. Just for that I'm lying throughout the survey.

Aaaaaand my incentive is..........

hmph

Dustin, my friend, that is some damn fine incentive, right there. I'm going to take it as soon as I get home, if you can just provide me with the young man's address.

Because... I want to ... stalk him tie him up in my basement do ungodly things to his body send him a greeting card.

AvB: ha!

You know what else is Communist, B-Slim? Star Wars. That's a fact. I saw it on the Internet. That makes you a Communist sympathizer.

Is that who that is, Genny? I didn't even know. Probably in part because I didn't actually look at his face.

Anyway, you and your ..."greeting card" are welcome to my basement. I'm not really so good at knots licking envelopes. (Wait... that's dirty too. Damn!)

Is it weird to want to sniff his neck?

By far the oddest question on the survey was the one about riding a segway.

You try.

You try to break my soul.

You ask for help in insulting me.

You set off this feminine landmine and tell the minority to disappear, and that you hope that they feel ugly.

This negative energy....just makes me stronger. I will not retreat. I am unstoppable.

70% female Pajiba readers/30% male Pajiba readers = I ought to be getting laid a lot more around here.

And I'm going to start on that, once I finish with AvB (1:18 to go, my sweet!).

... Soldier of Fortune Magazine?

Man, I can't wait till the Wolverine movie comes out. He plays Gambit. Hugh Jackman, Ryan Reynolds, and that guy up there all in the same movie.

And people think comic book movies are made for men.

He's playing Gambit, Genny (also Rusty)? That is almost too much hotness for one movie! Almost. I can't wait to see it!

I don't know...that hip vein thing is sorta bugging me out.

I suppose the whole ab-tastic, pouty-lipped thing just isn't for me.

Where are all the ladies that like guys who are either a little skinny or a little fat? Because those are my people...or wait, maybe not, because then we would be competeing for the same men...huh...well... back off, bitches.

I took the survey anyway, mostly because I enjoy taking them. They make me feel like I matter.

Did it really take almost an hour for the G word to come up?

Now now, Ms. Marie, aren't these respectable, discreet people here?

And yeah and what was with all them weird and disturbing Segway questions?

*one Segway question is TOO many as far as I'm concerned.

Hey Dustin-
They wanted me to write a testimonial.

A paper'd fan that coaxes minds alight
From embers glowing love of screen and verse;
Pajiba! Save me from this desk job plight,
And give me leave to judge and squee and curse!
Bound to thy endless fields of comment thread
Devoted to thine spoilers and reviews
Addicted to the spine-caressing dread
Of hearing some new bit of movie news-
Assuredly, thy splendor will be told
As any lurker e'er was rickroll'd.

I overdo things.

Well, that was weird. I'm getting the guy-with-the scorpion-in-his-nose ad right under Mr. Hot, Mysterious and Icky-Veined. It's like the angel/devil on your shoulder thing, right there.

Agreed, Barf. Nice work.

And Jay, to answer your question: I sincerely hope not.

Joolie: Yay! Pajeepover!

bucdaddy70% female Pajiba readers/30% male Pajiba readers = I ought to be getting laid a lot more around here.

Given how many of us are homos, and your purported oral skills, you should be booked solid.

Do you have webbed toes or something?

I mean, think about it. If two Pajibans hooked up and didn't tell us all about it, that would be downright ungrateful. I mean, I feel like we are all in this together, right? They'd OWE us.

Bah! hooking up in real life is overrated, I banged all the chicks here...in my head.

That's right ladies, Slim thinks about you ...a lot, especially when he's got tissues handy.

There should have been more questions about alcohol. Isn't that our area of expertise around here?

I'd love to see the results of that survey:

90% of Pajibans drink several times a week.
10% of Pajibans think "Nightly" is too limiting a response.
35% of Pajibans prefer Gin
60% of Pajibans prefer Whiskey
5% of Pajibans make their own liquor.
100% of Pajibans drink more frequently after Dustin posts about a Hitchcock remake starring Aston Kutcher.

10% of Pajibans think "Nightly" is too limiting a response.

Ah ha ha!! It's funny because it's true.

What's a Blo Gad?

Thanks guys. I had fun with it.

Ok, done. So when can I expect Taylor And His Scary Fuck-Muscle Vein to arrive at my door?

Some of the questions I had no answer for, as they were US-specific. Sorry about the blanks!

...........................wait, what?

Was there....was there readable text?

I'm ...i'm sorry i got completely and utterly....

You know that picture could have been Ryan Reynolds.

I mean.

Come on. You KNOW we'd have probably thanked you in ILLEGAL ways for a random, monday dose of ReynoldsAb

ohgodyes if by "sniff" you mean "bite it", then I'm all in. Rawrgh, but I'd do unspeakable things to that biscuit.

I better stop writing now.

Maybe it's just the narcissist in me, but I LOOOVE answering questions about myself.

Well, if I'm 100% man it's an awfully strange type, I'll tell ya that much.

Yeah I suppose if you don't have to do it for a living, divulging's fun. And it's nice to be invited to do so, right? I'll go on all day but I need an invitation, and after that it's your fault. But then I am a frustrated performer who hates to be the center of attention.

Necks are nice in general. I have a strong feeling about that. And you've got the whole pulse point thing going on if there's any fragrance present. If there's a little too much, or perhaps too recently, you might taste it, which isn't as good as smelling it, but, you know, within reason, you really don't care about that. Especially if you already like the fragrance, and you've got the warm skin version going on right in front of your nose. And then the side leads into the back of the neck as well as the ear and....yeah, it's nice.

I agree with Optimus. What the hell was the segway question about?

And that guy's veins scare me.

Survey completed. 0 Segway rides. Now, where is that address?

A) I can't believe I missed this last year. Damn work being so busy in November!

B) It's refreshing to actually find one's religion listed--except they left off the Universalists, and you don't wanna piss them off.

C) I wasn't sure if, for the purposes of the survey, Pajiba counted as a blog. I don't think of it as one, but it seemed like maybe Blogads does. That part was confusing.

D) The Main Squeeze who is a survey researcher (among the various forms of research he does), says that the survey is terrible. You know, from a good research perspective.

Two girls for evvvv-reeee booooooooooooooooooy!

Hood/Cooley 11/12/'08

TAYLOR KITSCH..... GAMBIT.....

Fuck, I think I'm going to go ahead and take the survey after all.

Well played, Dustin. But know that we've all probably developed an immunity to this hunk of man meat. (So maybe next time you should post a shirtless picture of Jensen Ackles, to up the ante)

*snorfles at Ada*

I had to Google "segway" to even be able to answer that. I guess non-USians answering the survey is not hugely useful.

*likes the body*
*passes on the face*
Oh well, you don't look at the mantlepiece when you're stoking the fire.

Well, that would make a bit more sense rather than a spectacularly lame pun for a spectacularly lame looking machine.

Sure it works. But it's still goofy. I'd say just get a damn bike or a Rascal. Get some exercise or completely say "fuck it".

... mind you, monkey_b, once you get past that first pic, it does get better.
And by 'better', I mean 'less gay'.

Oh... poor Sofia. It's a shame but I think this means I must be gone. I made a solemn vow. I return to the shadows from whence I came. Re-Lurk!

Ping,
er, no thanks (I assume you aren't joking?)
That shit is - or should be - private.

Okay I took the survey (it was pretty long). I get the usual questions, but why do you want to know how many tattoos and piercings your readers have? Is there some sort of hidden rule that you have to have a tattoo (tramp stamp) to be a "cool" Pajiban?

Tarn...I went to school with him, but wasn't actually serious about giving out the address. I agree that shit should remain private. I'm sure the last thing anyone would want is some creeper showing up in their parents driveway.

Ping,
sorry! I couldn't be sure if you meant it or not, from your post. I've seen an actor's private photos put up on a forum before now. Some people don't haz boundaries.

Absolutely! We're perverts here, not stalkers!
;-)

sorry, but the veins make me think hes going to morph into the hulk in about 3 seconds

monkey_b,

you're welcome!
yeah, that one is hot. The camera loves that boy. And it's not lying - I've met him, and damn...

Oh, don't worry, I think spontaneous jizzing happens a lot round here. See the comments after pics of Christina Hendricks, Ryan Reynolds etc. The Pajanitor and his mop are kept very busy...