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Biz Break: Now We Know the Guy Cast Opposite Captain America's Fine, Fine Ass

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | March 26, 2013 | Comments ()


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Muppets...Again has already snagged Tina Fey, Ricky Gervais, Ty Burrell, Ray Liotta, and Peter Serafinowicz for the human players in their adventure. Now it seems that Christoph Waltz and Tom Hiddleston have also been added to the cast. I don't know who Waltz will be playing, but it seems that Hiddleston will be The Great Escapo. (Bleeding Cool)

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Also relevant?
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In Loki-adjacent news, the unfortunately-faced Hemsworth has been cast in the Australian film The Reckoning. Luke Hemsworth will play a detective alongside Jonathon LaPaglia and the two will search for missing teens who recorded a murder. LaPaglia is the younger brother of Anthony Lapaglia and Hemsworth is the eldest of his acting family. I wonder if the movie will also feature Spike Knotts and Chip Hitler? (Deadline)

Hot on the heels of the widely meh'd casting of Megan Fox as April O'Neil in Michael Bay's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comes the casting of the heroes in a half shell themselves. Raphael will be played via motion capture by The Hunger Games: Catching Fire's Alan Ritchson. (Yep. Motion capture.) Pete Ploszek ("Parks & Recreation", "Shameless") is Leonardo, Jeremy Howard (Nothing. Nope) is Donatello, and Noel Fisher (The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part II) is Michaelangelo. (SlashFilm)

I'm going to entertain myself with the idea that the actors will be forced to wear humps on their backs while they perform their motion captures. Also, the idea that this dude is Michaelangelo:

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Last of all, and I suppose these could be SPOILERS to those that think they can somehow remain pure and innocent about such things, Marvel has cast their Drax and Baltoc the Leaper.

Drax is the role you may remember Jason Momoa turning down because he thinks he's a box office draw. Alas, he is not and the role has gone to a f*cking WWE wrestler named Dave Bautista. I fart in the general direction of any casting news involving a wrestler that isn't Dwayne Johnson.

Batroc the Leaper is an enemy of Captain America and his fine, fine ass. Like, really fine ass. Can we just take a moment and appreciate the work it took to get an ass like this?

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Batroc the Leaper is a buff enemy with no super powers. He's also French. Marvel has decided that the best casting choice for this is UFC kickboxing champion George St-Pierre. Athlete does not equal actor, Marvel. I know that superhero movies aren't the highest of art forms, but I still like to see some actoring happening in them. Damn. I'll be staring at Chris Evans' ass if you need me. (Don't need me.)



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