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Biz Break: I Don't Feel That I Need to Explain My Art to You, Warren

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | August 9, 2013 | Comments ()


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The image above is an Empire Records reunion of sorts, tweeted by Ethan Embry (via Vulture), featuring A.J., Mark, Warren, Eddie, and Berko, and I’ll be honest with you, I can barely recognize anyone besides Embry. Oh wait, now I see it: There’s Warren.

A few years ago, Katherine Heigl quit “Grey’s Anatomy” to pursue a film career, and after her film career sputtered, Heigl is now looking to get back into television, as she is developing a CIA drama in which she would play an adviser/communications liaison for the U.S. president, and probably in the tradition of “Scandal,” also sleeping with the President.

I love this image from the Funny or Die offices, with this caption: “Dean Norris stopped by with the script for the final Breaking Bad episode.”

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(Speaking of which, our buddy Josh Kurp has an interview up with Dean Norris over on Uproxx today that’s worth checking out).

CBS is developing “a medical soap based in New York City, inspired by the characters and themes immortalized in The Wizard of Oz.” Let us never speak of this again.

There is an unconfirmed report suggesting that Alec Baldwin is nearly set to host a weekly primetime show on MSNBC in which he would promote his liberal politics and presumably yell at people who disagree with him, including but not limited to his daughter.

Remember Penn Badgley? I think he was in the CW’s “Real Housewives of Spencer and Heidi Hang Out with the Gossip Girl” or something, but I know of him because he was the lead in Greetings from Tim Buckley, a Jeff Buckley biopic that irritated me by its very existence. I remember the trailer premiering, but I don’t think the movie ever got released.

Bygones.

Anyway, Badgley is now joining Ethan Hawke and Milla Jovovich in a contemporary update of Shakespeare’s Cymbeline, involving a war “between dirty cops and drug-dealing bikers.” Let us hope that this movie never sees the inside of a movie theater, either.




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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • nini

    oh god, i was so confused why justin bartha was in the middle of the picture but after better part of an hour of staring, i realized it was embry! is it ethan embry? i mean, i don't recognize anyone in that pic and i have seen empire record too many times.. hasn't my morning coffee kicked in or am i getting old?

  • Is it just me, or does that guy who was in the band look exactly the same?

  • Siege

    Empire Records is one of my favorite movies of all time, and Marc and AJ still look fantastic! (Glad to see AJ has recovered from being in the Ghost Rider sequel). Have heard some awful things about Coyote Shivers, though -- believe he was convicted of stalking and harassment of Pauley Perrette (Abby from NCIS)

  • Ever since MSNBC parted ways with Keith Olberman, they've had a vacancy in the 'Smug Blowhard That Shouts' department and I've no doubt that Alec Baldwin could fill that space.

    Won't change the fact that the only thing on that channel that comes anywhere near to being watchable is 'Morning Joe.'

  • mairimba

    “a medical soap based in New York City, inspired by the characters and themes immortalized in The Wizard of Oz.”

    Did CBS start popping pills after breaking with Time Warner?

  • "CBS is developing “a medical soap based in New York City, inspired by the characters and themes immortalized in The Wizard of Oz.” Let us never speak of this again."

    OhmyGOD. THIS IS GENIUS.

    Meet...Dorothy "Dottie" Gale She's a wide-eyed, innocent girl fresh off the Kansas farm, who has just been given a scholarship by Buck "The Wiz" Fitzwallace, an eccentric billionaire who she saved from death by performing an emergency tracheotomy on him in the middle of a Kansas road! She arrives at Omaha Zion Hospital--or OZ--where she will have great trials and adventures as she meets...

    Meredith "The Witch" West, the hospital's chief of staff, who sets one eye on Dorothy's pretty stupid face and vows to DESTROY HER when Dorothy spills coffee on her priceless shoes. But she will be thwarted by...

    Gloria "The Good" Glindon, her sister and Dottie's mentor! She will help her survive as Dottie encounters the hospital's wisecracking staff, including...

    Mark "TinMan" Tinner! He is the handsome and rakish chief of surgery with a TRAGIC PAST, which turned him cold and unfeeling, until he meets Dottie and he realizes that MAYBE HE HAD A HEART AFTER ALL, specially once he sees Dottie helping out..

    LeMarcus Jones*, the hapless and clumsy male nurse who is terrified of TinMan and may be a little bit gay or bicurious, maybe! He's great friends with...

    *EDIT: To add dizzylucy's brilliant change, this character is now called LeMarcus Oliver Jones, or "Leo", for short.

    Bobby "HayFever" McLean, the sassy (and super gay!) city boy who becomes Dottie's roommate and very best friend! He is sassy and loud and hilarious! He will teach her how to dance and how to dress and say wildly inappropriate things to her bosses and patients!

    Will Dottie survive the big city? Will she help the citizens of Oz Hospital realize that hard work and dedication are nothing in the face of a cute chick and having a lot of sex?

    FIND OUT ON CBS THIS FALL.

    **

    Shit. Give me some money right now.

  • stella

    Im throwing money around but nothings happening. Now im sad..

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    First: You, madame, have given this entirely too much thought, and for that reason you are now my spirit guide. Congratulations. It doesn't pay much, but the position also has no health insurance.

    Secondly: I see Alexis Bledel as Dottie. I see Mary Louise Parker as Meredith and I see Eliza Coupe as Gloria.

  • I was thinking more Lara Flynn Boyle for Meredith. She's not doing anything, is she?

    But MLP sounds kind of brilliant. She'd wear six-inch heels and short skirts. In a HOSPITAL.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    For Meredith? And I doubt she's terribly busy right now.

  • Three_nineteen

    Why doesn't LeMarcus get a nickname?

  • dizzylucy

    His middle name could be something like Oscar or Oliver, so they call him Le-O Jones.

    You do know that this is WAAAAY better than anything CBS will come up with.

  • I'm seriously looking forward to the actual show description, just to gloat about how right I was, or how much better mine was.

  • I gave up on trying to find something that was LIKE "Lion" but not, you know, "Lion".

    I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Make him a hispanic character and name him Leon.

  • Siege

    Why is he not called Leo?

  • THAT IS FUCKING GENIUS.

    I can't believe I didn't think about that. Eeeeesh.

  • Three_nineteen

    Leo "King of the Jungle" Jones?

  • The first episode involves Dottie saving the lives of 15 midgets. Somehow. I can't do everything.

  • Scully

    STOP CALLING ME WARREN! MY NAME ISN'T F*CKING WARREN!

  • Welldressed

    Eddie: Rap, metal, rap, metal...Whitney Houston?
    Warren: It's for my girlfriend.
    Eddie: Sure it is.

  • MGMcD

    His name isn't Warren.
    His name isn't Warren.
    I thought his name was Warren?

  • InternetMagpie

    Thank you, Dustin, for letting me know that Ethan Embry is on twitter. Hopefully he has a good sense of humor and occasionally searches for tweets that reference him and his movies; it's now become my mission to get him to participate in a That Thing You Do! quote party.

  • Michelle

    I have so much fondness for That Thing You Do!, it's kind of ridiculous. so yes, do this.

  • TCH

    Good ol Katherine Heigl. Something tells me this new venture will be met with a mixed reception.

  • Mrs. Julien

    One would have thought that given the odds of a Full Baldwin, Alec would be best served by HBO.

  • **I AM** NotTheOne

    On an Aaron Sorkin show.

  • WhoDeyKY

    Katherine Heigl..CIA...adviser...NO. Just no. However she did rock my 12 year old world in the made for Disney "Wish Upon a Star" movie.
    And... I know we shouldn't speak of it, but a medical soap based in New York City, inspired by the characters and themes immortalized in The Wizard of Oz.Read? Which themes are we speaking of? The "don't drop a house on a bitch and steal her shoes" one?

  • "Water will kill you if it touches your body"? I mean, I have heard some things about the NYC subway, but that's a bit harsh, don't ya think?

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    I read that "Cyberlime", and briefly imagined Doctor Who was real and that Shakespeare had written a cyperpunk epic about a war between purveyors of digital limeades.

    I mean. That would make sense in the 16th century.

  • DataAngel

    You set up the kickstarter for funding. I'll start working on the time machine. We can MAKE THIS HAPPEN.

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