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Biz Break: 7 Scintillating News Bits You Can Read on Your Smart Phone While Standing in Line to Vote

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | November 3, 2012 | Comments ()


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How in God's name are we supposed to focus on pop-culture minutia on a day like this? I hope you're not even reading this post, unless you're killing time before the results, reading it on your phone while waiting in line at a polling station, and/or taking a break from trying to locate where you're supposed to vote.

I like the way they do it in Washington state (I think).

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Anyway, so: Yeah. I guess Harrison Ford is maybe interested in returning for the new Stars Wars movie. He'll be 70 by the time its released, which makes him better suited to the Obi-Wan Kenobi than Han Solo, but I'm sure they'll figure out a way to work him -- and Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill -- into the movie if they want to be in it.

Peter Gallagher -- who has the world's sexiest eyebrows -- will appear on "How I Met Your Mother" soon as cocky and aloof Professor Vinick who taught Ted architecture in college. Also, this season has been a total sh*t-show or recycled plot-lines, filler eposes, and wasted opportunities. I could've sworn I'd seen last night's episode three times, already.

CBS is working on a spin-off of "NCIS: Los Angeles," which itself was a spin-off of "NCIS," which was a spin-off of "JAG." I think this one is set in an RV or something.

It will feature new characters who will be introduced in two-part episode of NCIS: LA later this season. The proposed spinoff, produced by CBS TV Studios, will follow a small mobile team of agents, who are forced to live and work together, as they crisscross the country solving crimes.

Bill Lawrence ("Scrubs," "Cougar Town") is developing another television show, which has received a put-pilot commitment from ABC for an ensemble cop show called "Feel the Force." It centers on two rookie female cops who struggle to prove themselves in a male-dominated police force.

Male-dominated work force, you say? If John C. McGinley is not cast in the show as one of the domineering, sarcastic males, I will be greatly disappointed.

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Coldplay drummer Will Champion will show up on "Games of Thrones" next season as ... a drummer. Snow Patrol lead singer Gary Lightbody was cast in a cameo role over the summer. I wonder if, in 30 years, Snow Patrol and Coldplay will be considered this generation's Air Supply?

CBS is giving its Super Bowl lead-out slot this year to "Elementary," which is an achingly dull procedural. Here's 5 of the better Super Bowl lead outs in recent memory, all significantly better than the choice of "Elementary."

Finally, via Collider, here's a first look of Brad Pitt's long in-development World War Z, an "Entertainment Tonight' promo for a full-length trailer due out on Thursday. Those are fast zombies, folks. NOT CANON.




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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • FUCK YOU, BRAD PITT. FUCK YOU. How can you get it so WRONG?

    You know what probably happened? Some fuckhead shitdick wrote a script for a zombie movie and some dipshit fuckhat decided to name it after the greatest book about Zombies ever and FUCK EVERYTHING.

  • Jannymac

    So, in hiring the drummer for GOT, is that a sign that next season is going to feature TRW? I vaguely remember from the books that drums hid....things.

  • competitivenonfiction

    ohgodohgodohgod.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    What good is a cameo if no one knows what your face looks like? The Snow Patrol singer is as bland as his band's music. I only vaguely remember him being brown-haired.

  • e jerry powell

    I think John McGinley needs to get a hummer on television so that we may all know if he can do anything other than crack wise.

  • BobbFrapples

    Even though the zombies are fast (not canon), I can see what they're aiming for: army ants. They devour anything that gets in their way. Too bad they're going with Twilight level CGI. *sigh*

  • Drake

    Oh, I'l have to tell my dear old mother about the new NCIS. She is going to be SO excited!

  • JenVegas

    I just saw that John C. McGinley is staring in a production of Glengarry, Glenross in NYC for a limited run. I wanted to let all of the NY Pajibans know because I'm going to be pouting all day over not being able to get there to see it.

  • Amanda

    I can't believe Entertainment Tonight is still on the air. What a crapfest.

  • Puddin

    Who the hell wears a pashmina during the zombie apocalypse?

  • Romeo Cranberry

    is the phrase "cock up" a thing now?

  • Erica O.

    A cock up is like the Supreme Court obscenity ruling. You'll know it when you see it.

  • Bert_McGurt

    If that's Washington State, then the electoral officials are DICKS. (The polling place has a Boston address.)

  • Wembley

    Seriously? Female cops need to prove themselves still? Women have been in uniform for decades. I see plenty of them all the time. Hell, 26 years ago when the entire dogwatch shift showed up at our impromptu one-year high school reunion one-third of them were female.

  • Miley's Virus

    Agreed. I think Cagney and Lacey pretty much covered all the plots for this one.

  • Mrcreosote

    Wow, that World War Z movie is a classic cockup. The book wasn't an action movie. This pile just looks like it's had it's brain removed. And not in the fun braaaaaiiiiins way, but the dumb "let's make a quick buck" way.

  • Washington state voting does rock. I got to peruse my voter's guide in my pajamas, mail my ballot in at my leisure, and still get done with voting early.

  • demondoll

    Did you catch the French Horn candidate?

  • No! What is this about?

  • demondoll

    From the ballot pamphlet
    "Richard Sanders Washington Supreme Court-Position 9
    -Legal/Judicial Experience: I served on the Supreme Court until 2011, first elected in 1995; and reelected in 1998 and 2004. I wrote more opinions than any other current Justice. Before that, I practiced law for 26 years. I also served as an adjunct professor teaching appellate advocacy at the UW School of Law, and guest lectured on state constitutional law at Seattle University.
    -Other Professional Experience: I am an Eagle Scout and played for the University of Washington in the Rose Bowl. (French horn!)

    Aren't you proud to be a Washyourhandsingtonian?

  • So proud. At least it offered a little personality to the occasion.

  • demondoll

    He kinda made my day :-)

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    There's not even such a thing as fast zombies. Fast and zombie are mutually exclusive categories, whatever a handful of movies would like to pretend.

  • ed newman

    Feel The Force is a terrible title. Really. Almost Cougar Town bad. Is Bill Lawrence fucking with us?

  • Groundloop

    If "NCIS: Winnebago" doesn't have a chimp or a dog that helps with the investigations, I will be sorely disappointed.

    Not that I was going to watch it either way, but the disappointment would remain.

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    I don't even think it'll be a Winnebago. It'll be "NCIS: Semi and Standing Reservations at All the Motels." Also, on account of the N, it'll be a super-intelligent dolphin in a tank who runs their forensics.

  • Groundloop

    You were losing me until you got to the dolphin! If they have the dolphin wear one of those old timey reflector thingys I would watch the ever loving shit outta that show!

  • Erica O.

    Fast moving zombies in World War Z? NOT CANNON indeed. Way to cock up one of my favorite books in recent memory. Zombies are scary because they're a slow moving but overwhelming force of a writhing, thoughtless decay, hell-bent on using your intestines for dental floss. It's the sheer thought of total war launched by maggoty meat bags that makes me crap myself. Like, hey, I'm gonna go off and take a squat in the woods, it's some dippy Disney princess shit with birds and butterflies and OH SHIT that's a hand on my ankle. Yep. I literally just shit myself.

    Stupid fast moving zombies. Instead it'll be all like, gonna go take my afternoon constitutional, oh shit, now I have to run for my life from a mass of fast moving zombies with a hive mind. Nope, didn't shit myself. Sympathetic nervous system kicked in, but yep, now I'm zombie meat. Damn.

  • lonolove

    As much as it pains me to say this, FUCK Brad Pitt, man! I'm so pissed that he got in a bidding war for the rights to that book, only to throw out what looks to be 80% of it, completely restructure it and in general BASTARDIZE it so that he is sure to disappoint fans of the book, fans of traditional zombie horror and people with even a shred of intelligence! He better buck up, 'cause his looks appear to be going the way of Robert Redford (i.e. tanned leather baseball mitt for a face) and he needs to have something to recommend him besides those awful Chanel spots.

  • Pablo Z

    Whoa . . . why do those massing zombies resemble the wall/column-climbing orcs from LOTR, Fellowship?!

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