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Biz Break: 5 Pieces Of Hollywood Insanity to Get You Over The Hump Today.

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | May 29, 2013 | Comments ()


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Perhaps your brain loves you and you were able to completely cleanse it of the knowledge that a Smurfs 2 exists and wants you to be sad forever. I didn't forget. I still remember. I weep softly and I REMEMBER.

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Less existential crisis causing while still being a sequel is Insidious Chapter 2. If you haven't seen the first, um, "Chapter", this is a SPOILER: How the effing eff did Lin Shaye's psychic lady character survive at the end?!?! Yet, there she is. Twin sister? CYBORG??

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Anyway, Chapter 2 has the family attempting to understand why they are so connected to the spirit world from the first movie. This picture leads to yet another question that could be a SPOILER: I thought Patrick Wilson's fine ass was possessed?

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In non-sequel news, but still news that makes you want to punch yourself, Dreamworks Animation will be releasing a movie called Trolls. Is this a fun cartoon version of Trollhunter (because that would be sweet)? NOPE. It's "a grand scale musical comedy centering around how the Trolls came into their vibrant and colorful hair." Perhaps they'll also touch upon the reasoning the Trolls have for owning no genitals or pants. Surely we can count on Shrek Ever After's director to steer us directly into Hell.

OK, this piece of news should actually assist you in staving off the impulse to drink bong water, or whatever the hell you do in your office on Wednesdays. Pacific Rim has released new photos showing ROBOTS SMASH MONSTERS! They're pretty cool. Thanks, Empire!

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Last of all, Transformers 4 has two new Autobots. Seen in these photos, they are convincingly portraying a C7 Corvette Stingray and a Bugatti Grand Sport Vitesse. I'm guessing that the Corvette transforms into...uh. I have no idea. Perhaps some of you will hazard guesses?

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Hmm. These probably didn't help you out much for getting through the day, did they?



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • gnibs

    I'm guessing both of them will transform into some stupid loud shit.

  • Robert

    Jodi, regarding the Insidious spoilers: Wilson was not possessed, but the psychic was most assuredly dead in the first one. What tech are they going to use to explain her resurrection?

  • I am so damn excited for Pacific Rim. I'm also terrified that it'll be awful.

    Either way though: FUCKING MECHAS, MAN.

  • BlackRabbit

    Are the Trolls are made in the town of Nilbog? (A cookie if you get this pointlessly obscure reference.)

  • Pinky McLadybits

    There's no coffee in Nilbog. It's the devil's drink.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    If they really do make that Trolls movie, will they cast the Olsen twins as main characters?

    And am I allowed to burn down the sets? http://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net...

  • DataAngel

    Both cars look like those rainforest frogs that are tiny and adorable and loaded with venom. So. Frogs. Because why not.

    Edit: also, apparently Smurfs 2 was Jonathan Winters' last film. Hell of a thing to go out on.

  • BWeaves

    You read my mind.

  • I'm guessing the Corvette has to transform into some sort of robot snake. It's screaming green, plus it pretty much looks like the Voldemort of cars. The Bugatti will obviously turn into a robot David Beckham, or, just David Beckham. In which case, I'm definitely going to see it.

  • koko temur

    None of these are going to help to get through the day, but Jodi getting sad and murder-inclined, definately will.

  • Mrs. Julien

    It helped a little. The Corvette is a pretty shade of green and Patrick Wilson is a pretty shade of man.

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