web counter
 

Another Romantic Comedy! Two in One Day!

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (18)

Anne-Hathaway-001.jpg

Not content to actually cast Alyssa Milano in a genre appropriate film, Hollywood has done it again! (Pardon me. I’m feeling a little punch drunk this morning.) Tobey Maguire — who has never really done a romantic comedy before, but thought: Fuck it. If Katherine Heigl can do it, so can Spiderman! — is producing and starring in an adaptation of Isaac Adamson’s novel, Tokyo Suckerpunch (yeah. Go back and read it again. Slower. It’s Adamson. Not Asimov). Ed Solomon is writing, and if that makes you do a happy dance, you might want to break your kneecaps (Solomon also penned the forthcoming Eddie Murphy fantasy shitfest, Imagine That).

Anyway, according to Sci-Fi Wire, Solomon thinks this is the movie that will finally be able to help Maguire separate himself form the Spiderman character (that separation will be short-lived, since he’s going to go back and do another Spiderman, but whatevs). Anyway, according to Solomon, this is what the movie is about:

“He’s a graphic novelist who lives in Cleveland and writes a graphic novel about himself that he sets in Tokyo,” Solomon said. “He has a certain fantasia of what Japan is and has a certain fantasia of what a real woman is. Neither exists in reality, but he goes off to Tokyo in pursuit of this fantasy woman.”

Tokyo is precisely where I’d go to find my fantasy woman. Everything I know about Tokyo I learned from Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift and those ladies were hot!

So, who will play that fantasy woman? Anne Hathaway is in negotiations to do so. And she’s just perfect cause she’s actually been in romantic comedies before. Like Bride Wars. She can totally show Maguire the ropes. She can teach him how to pratfall. Spill wine on his pants. And kiss in a way that real people don’t actually kiss, but it looks good on camera!

According to Solmon: “He goes there with his editor, to be played by Anne Hathaway, and ends up it’s a love story about him and Anne Hathaway, basically, and it’s really about a guy figuring out what matters to him.”

Wow! A romantic comedy where two people who aren’t romantically engaged actually become romantically engaged. Oh, Hollywood! What will you think of next?!

Gary Ross (Pleasantville) is set to direct.









Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← First Image from Clash of the Titans | Heathcliff Movie Announced →









Comments

Why would you go to Japan to find a cracker-ass cracker like Anne Hathaway? Shouldn't you go to Japan to find, I don't know, a Japanese woman?

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at June 2, 2009 10:51 AM

Yeah, that's what we want. Get rid of all that extraneous Spiderman stuff, and give us a full film of emo Maguire pointing at women, playing piano and dancing in the street.

Posted by: branded at June 2, 2009 10:51 AM

ha! TB beat me to it.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at June 2, 2009 10:55 AM

As an actual cracker from crackerville, AR, I resent that remark about Anne Hathaway. Even if the idea of her being an ass cracker will have me laughing all day.

Posted by: hater from siloam springs at June 2, 2009 10:57 AM

He has a certain fantasia of what Japan is and has a certain fantasia of what a real woman is.

As in, she is a pink elephant wearing a tutu?

What is wrong with using a real word, dickhead? This guy gets paid to write professionally. Think about that.

Posted by: marya at June 2, 2009 11:03 AM

Totally gotta go with Tracer here. Why not just pick up a nice Japanese lady. Afterall, from what I've learned from the internet, they have all been taught, since birth, how to please a man with ancient Japanese sexual techniques and LOOOOOOVE dressing like slutty schoolgirls.

I dunno what those techniques are exactly, but since they're ancient they probably have something to do with a torch made from Yak fat oil and some sort of polished rock. CAN'T WAIT!!!!

Posted by: PissBoy at June 2, 2009 11:13 AM

"He has a certain fantasia of what Japan is and has a certain fantasia of what a real woman is."

This is EXACTLY the sort of parent's basement living manchild who DOES marry a Japanese woman who doesn't speak English. As soon as she does learn English, she will divorse his ass and find a real man.

Posted by: BWeaves at June 2, 2009 11:16 AM

I'm down with Marya. I can't get over the fact that he used 'fantasia' twice. THAT'S NOT WHAT IT FUCKING MEANS!!!! It doesn't make you sound smart or interesting to use words that sound like the word you mean. Jackass.

Posted by: Marra at June 2, 2009 11:19 AM

Seems like a lot of trouble and expense to go through. Isn't there a Web site (or 3,000,000) devoted to hooking up guys with lovely Asian ladies?

Only five? That's what Google says when I plug in "meet lovely Asian ladies." And only eight for "Asian girls."

Wow.

Well, it's off to Tokyo, then.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at June 2, 2009 11:22 AM

For fuck's sake, where's the Asian spam-bot when ya actually need one??

Posted by: Rykker at June 2, 2009 11:30 AM

Announcement: due to her love of all things snarky and editorial, Sharon now has a crush on Marya

Posted by: Sharon at June 2, 2009 11:37 AM

I totally saw Asimov...

*hangs head*

Now I'm sad.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at June 2, 2009 11:41 AM

That use of "fantasia" made my eye twitch too.

Typing it made it twitch more.

*twitch*

There's no way in hell I'll ever be able to see this movie.

Posted by: Genny (also Rusty) at June 2, 2009 11:42 AM

Fuck Fast and the Furious. You should go to Japan but because it's the most perverted country in the world. The Japs love sexy costumes and all kinds of kinkiness. Kinky comics are also a big thing. Nerdy Pajibites would love it. Reading them is not even frowned upon. You often see people on the bus reading them or your boss getting into the office with some twisted, perverted comic rolled under his arm. The food is excellent and you can get up to all kinds of sahit in that country. It was previously an oppressed country but now it's freer than most. It's not even bogged down in religious arguments. Japs just want to have fun. Two thumbs up.

Posted by: barf at June 2, 2009 12:45 PM

just watched tobey in 'wonder boys' yesterday.....
he's so much better than just being 'spiderman'....
sigh.

Posted by: maxpurr9 at June 2, 2009 3:22 PM

Oh, come on. Like any sane woman would ever go for Tobey "Mr. Pancake Face Whitest Manboy on Earth" Maguire. I know you're supposed to suspend your desbelief for movies, but come the fuck on

Posted by: figgy at June 2, 2009 4:59 PM

And this is why Anne Hathaway didn't win for Best Actress folks. The girl can't act for starters (In my humble opinion) and she picks romantic comedies to star in, so it's a combination of suck. If this is code for "Start Liking Anne Hathaway or else!" I don't think I can stomach any more of Ms. Hathaway this life over. Until I'm impressed by her, and I mean IMPRESSED, I'll retain my bitter and snappy persona ranting and bitching about talentless this girl is. Maguire I really like, but her, no sir-ee.
Oh and The Devil Wears Prada is playing in the other room, how freaking meta!

Posted by: Kamikaze Feminist at June 2, 2009 5:38 PM

I actually like Anne Hathaway (I find her refreshingly different from the spray-tanned bleached blonde anorexics), but won't be watching this. Really--go to Japan to find his "fantasy woman"? Only if Peter Parker is into Japanese schoolgirls with ginormous boobies who are martial arts experts (but during fighting lose bits of clothes). And something about tentacles.

Posted by: True_Blue at June 2, 2009 7:41 PM