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What Do Katherine Heigl and Ferris Bueller Have in Common?

By TK | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (20)

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A couple of months ago, Dustin reported that his secret Hollywood crush, Katherine Heigl, was set to star in The Age of Adaline, a supernatural “epic love story” about an immortal woman wookin’ pa nub, which would thereby make her mortal.

It sounded like shit.

Now the film, retitled simple Adaline, has a director. Andy Tennant has signed onto the film, and what little hope you may have had for Heigl to actually star in something interesting and, you know, not fucking horrible, has been throttled, beaten, and thrown into the sea. Andy Tennant has directed such cinematic masterpieces as The Bounty Hunter, Fool’s Gold, Hitch, and Ever After (sadly, we don’t have a review of that last one, and NO, I am not volunteering). In other words: mindlessly generic, intellectually bankrupt romcom garbage. The man directs with the skill of a drunken baboon, and that’s an insult to baboons, drunk or sober.

Interestingly, it appears that he’s been around for a while, and was likely much more successful (quality-wise, anyway) in his days as a television director — he’s directed episodes of “The Wonder Years,” “Brisco County Jr.,” and “Parker Lewis.” Even more interesting is that he directed the pilot episode of the fan-favorite “Sliders,” and an episode of the short-lived 1990 sitcom “Ferris Bueller.”

Wait, what? There was a Ferris Bueller TV show? I shit you not, folks.

What the fuck? Where… how? What? I mean, I know I don’t watch much TV, but how did this slip past me?

::heads to Youtube::

AHA!


Holy. Fuck. Balls.

And it starred Jennifer Aniston in the Jennifer Grey role!

Wow.

No fucking way.

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You’re goddamn welcome.

(source: Variety)









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Comments

Ever After is quite good and repeat-watchable, and Anjelica Houston is in there, and the greatest crying scene ever in the history of all time (second to the end of Sense and Sensibility) but it is romantic and goofy and disposable, and even at the positive side of that scale, doesn't amount to much to look forward to.

Posted by: twig at July 21, 2010 9:19 AM

Yeah, it was sad. There was "Parker Lewis Can't Lose", which I believe was first, and was obviously a ripoff. Then the actual Ferris, like a horrible reimagining of the Ghostbusters cartoon war. I watched neither. The 80s were an evil time.

Posted by: Jay at July 21, 2010 9:21 AM

I never watched the Ferris Bueller tv show, but I remember when it was on. It premiered around the same time as "Parker Lewis Can't Lose," but was yanked pretty quickly (a review I read at the time the shows came out indicated that Ferris Bueller came off as pretty smarmy and unlikable). A season or so later, Parker Lewis Finally Lost.

Posted by: Craig at July 21, 2010 9:26 AM

Wow! You know the "Ferris Bueller" TV show was quality programming by the scene transition wipes. Schmancy!

Posted by: Dustin Rowles at July 21, 2010 9:28 AM

I loved the Ferris Bueller tv show! But Parker Lewis can't lose was way better.

Posted by: SarahReznor at July 21, 2010 9:30 AM

Dear TK: you're uuuunce, tiiice, fee tiiimes a mady.

I really can't believe that the brilliance behind the The Bounty Hunter could turn this into anything but an Oscar nomination for himself and the lovely Miss Heigl.

Posted by: admin at July 21, 2010 9:35 AM

I just spent 10 minutes explaining this to my coworker, this shoulda been called "What do Katherin Heigl and a drunken baboon have in common".

Posted by: SarahReznor at July 21, 2010 9:35 AM

I think I might've watched this as a kid, but thankfully Korsakoff's has taken care of those pesky memories.

Posted by: Pants at July 21, 2010 9:51 AM

I'd heard of the Ferris Bueller show but never seen it. That is one of the worst theme songs I've heard, yet it's oddly hilarious.

Don't be hating on Ever After though, that movie isn't half bad.

Posted by: Caillan at July 21, 2010 10:00 AM

Holy Crap!! Was that Ma Petrelli as Ferris' mom??!!

Posted by: OlorinGrayhame at July 21, 2010 10:03 AM

Oooooooh, TK, you better watch what you say about Ever After. You KNOW that Lainey Bobainey will be all up in here hitting you with a shovel for that.


(P.S. I also love Ever After. I'm too tired to start any fights today, but NOT too tired to instigate....)

Posted by: Anna von Beaverdouche at July 21, 2010 10:04 AM

Andy Tennant has directed such cinematic masterpieces as The Bounty Hunter, Fool’s Gold, Hitch, and Ever After (sadly, we don’t have a review of that last one, and NO, I am not volunteering).

You just did, buddy.


The sad part isn't that you didn't know about the Ferris Bueller TV show, it's that you obviously missed out on Blossom week.

[spins into a new outfit, does the running man Joey Lawrence]

Posted by: jM at July 21, 2010 10:08 AM

Corin Nemec. I believe that's the actor who played Parker Lewis, isn't it? I've no idea why that name popped into my head. But that show was way better than the 'Bueller' show.

There's one 'Parker Lewis' episode that I remember keeping on VHS for years, because it had an excellent, trippy guitar soundtrack that flowed through the entire show.

Posted by: Bill (Formerly Bill) at July 21, 2010 10:24 AM

I can't believe you've never heard of that TV show.

Posted by: Seany D at July 21, 2010 10:48 AM

Whatever, I love Ever After. I'll review it! I've only watched a million times. I don't feel any particular guilt about that, or I'd call it a guilty pleasure. It may not be intellectually stimulating, but it sure is fun! :-P

Posted by: KatSings at July 21, 2010 10:52 AM

If there's such thing as a Blog Academy Awards (The Bloggies?), this should win for best post of the year. Why? "Wookin' pa nub."

In all da wong paces. Wookin' pa nub.

Posted by: RobP at July 21, 2010 11:49 AM

I think the most terrifying thing about the "Ferris Bueller" TV series theme, was the NBC Announcer reminding viewers that it was "AMERICAN BLOSSOM WEEK!" during the closing credits.

Three "special" airings of Blossom in one week.

Thank Buddha I missed out on that rectal exam.


Posted by: bleujayone at July 21, 2010 12:29 PM

Dustin reported that his secret Hollywood crush, Katherine Heigl

Of all the shots you've taken at Dustin lately (justifiably so, I mean, making you watch Lifetime???), this may be the most insulting: would-be lover of Rainbow Killer.

Posted by: Uriah Creep at July 21, 2010 10:54 PM

I'll totally review Ever After. I love that damn movie to pieces.

Posted by: figgy at July 22, 2010 1:10 AM

Can I just say nice to read a relief to find anyone who actually understands just what they may be talking about on the internet. You certainly discover how to take a problem to light and enable it to be vital. More people need to learn this and know this section of the story. I cannot believe you're not very popular because you definitely have the gift.

Posted by: Mac nick at January 23, 2011 1:33 PM