All the TV News You Need to Know While Standing in Line to Buy Those Crappy Things You Don't Need Because They're Cheap
Elizabeth Henstridge and Iain De Caestecker are the latest additions to Joss Whedon's "SHIELD" television series, playing the science whiz and the gadget dick, respectively. They look like this.
My question is, who are these people and where are the Whedon regulars? Why is this cast shaping up to look like a CW knock-off? WE EXPECT MORE, DAMNIT.
In case you haven't yet heard, on Wednesday night it was announced that Chevy Chase had quit NBC's "Community," effective immediately. However, it's not that big of a deal to the show because the finale of the 13-episode season has already been filmed (they shot the episodes out of order), and there are only one or two episodes left to shoot, and the show is very unlikely to get a fifth season. His absence may not even be felt. Why did he leave? No official reason has been given, but the unofficial one is that Chevy Chase is a huge f*cking dick. The end.
Can we just all agree right now that Jessica Brown Findlay is the prettiest reason to watch "Downton Abbey"? We can! Good. It's settled then.
From the Sports Illustrated Vault, and the Twitter account of Andy Gray, here's a picture of Jon Stewart in his soccer days at William & Mary.
Just FYI: As we announced earlier this week, ABC has cancelled by "Last Resort" and "666 Park Avenue," but if -- like me -- you're going to stick it out until the bitter end (at least with "Last Resort"), you might be heartened to know that the show runners will provide some closure at the end of their original 13-episode orders. So, you don't have to quit on it, thinking you'll never get any resolution.
The December 17th episode of "How I Met Your Mother," will be the show's first hour-long one. Why? Because "Some really big crap happens." It's probably Robin and Barney's engagement, but if the show's frustrating history is any indication, it'll just be Ted coming to terms with the fact that he's never going to be with Robin (again) and rekindling his relationship with Victoria (again). HOORAY for recycled plot lines in perpetuity. Bring on seven more seasons!
Here's your first look at Patton Oswalt as Constable Bob in next season's "Justified."
Who is winning the Sunday night cable drama competition this fall? If you're curious:
1. "Walking Dead" -- 13.4 million viewers
2. "Boardwalk Empire" -- 3.4 million viewers
3. "Dexter" -- 3.3 million viewers
4. "Homeland" -- 3.0 million viewers
Who is winning in terms of pure quality, according to my completely objective opinion? NO ONE DENIES THIS.
1. "Walking Dead"
2. "Boardwalk Empire"
In celebrity news, Mayim Bialik is divorcing this guy, citing irreconcilable differences.
IN THE MOST IMPORTANT NEWS OF THE DAY, Lindsay Lohan's Lifetime movie, "Liz and Dick" airs on Sunday night, and folks, you're in for a treat, as Courtney Enlow will be live-blogging it on the site. Do stop by. Bring boxed wine, a $100 bill, and a few lines of coke, if you got 'em.
Finally, Alicia Keys was on Jimmy Fallon's show this week, where she sang a truly soulful, rousing version of "The Gummi Bears Theme Song." It will strip the hair off your pubus, folks.
Hopefully, Adele will come on soon to do the "Care Bears" theme song.