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All of the Non Comic-Con News in One Convenient Place

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Trade News | July 22, 2013 | Comments ()


toastman.jpg

It was so tempting to just leave the post blank as its own punchline, but that’s a risky proposition given that Dustin has secretly ensured that treasonous dentists installed remote detonating explosives in place of fillings in each of the writers’ mouths. A computer monitors our posts day and night, eternally vigilant with no humor for low word counts or insolence. Dan has lasted the longest because he performs all his own dentistry with mirrors and a blow torch.

But seriously, Comic-Con is the black hole of all trade news. It sucks all the stories in for a month on either side of its week in the sun, leaving us to feast on the cavalcade of panels and trailers coming out of Hall H, or starving on the crumbs remaining outside of the San Diego Convention Center.

For instance, at the moment, THR has 30 stories on its main feed. If we removed all the ones that are reported from Comic-Con itself, whether they have the words explicitly in the title or not, we’re only left with six articles: an analysis of summer box offices, an early review of The Wolverine, the weekend box office results, a bit about Cory Monteith, an article about Terence Malick getting sued by investors, and the obituary of “a pioneering supermodel agent”.

And THR - and I have never said these words before about them, and probably never will again - is the least of the offenders. God, what’s a writer got to do to get groped by John Barrowman around here?



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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • Uriah_Creep

    I just want to upvote your first paragraph, SLW. Especially the bit about Dan.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    Powdered TOAST man!!!

  • Maguita NYC

    I can grope you... May not be news worthy to you, but it'll be for me.

  • alwaysanswerb

    Ugh, I am so sick of fake geek guys who just show up to put their impeccably groomed torsos on display. I bet he's never even made powdered toast.

  • Deidra

    That is brilliant. Kudos to this!

  • Don't slow down now! We have a royal baby approaching!

  • apsutter

    Finally! I'm sick of hearing about that shit

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