A Wrinkle in Time Film

"Alike and Equal Are Not the Same."

By Steven Lloyd Wilson | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (27)

“As the skipping rope hit the pavement, so did the ball. As the rope curved over the head of the jumping child, the child with the ball caught the ball. Down came the ropes. Down came the balls. Over and over again. Up. Down. All in rhythm. All identical. Like the houses. Like the paths. Like the flowers.”

A lifelong Christian and rationalist, L’Engle frequently saw her works both banned from Christian bookstores and criticized by secularists for their Christian components. Perhaps the best sign of a work’s wisdom is that is pisses everybody off.

A Wrinkle in Time is the multiple-award winning young adult’s book by Madeline L’Engle that has probably been read by as many geeks in their formative years as The Lord of the Rings. It is a beautiful and mind-stretching tale that articulates a gestalt of faith and rationality, placing imperative importance on love, curiosity and a deep thirst for understanding the universe while identifying the great evil of history as close minded conformity.

Naturally, Disney owns the movie and television rights to the story and is eyeing a feature length adaptation. They’ve brought in Jeff Stockwell to write the screenplay, which is a logical choice since he’s never written jack shit. They also landed Cary Granat as the producer, which is even more exciting since the only thing he’s got a credit for in the last decade is as producer of the abominable Journey to the Center of the Earth. But he’s also got a version of Rats of NIMH in development, so he’s apparently aiming for a trifecta of classic children’s literature rape over a three year period.

Disney tried it before, producing a television movie for ABC in 2003. Newsweek interviewed L’Engle at the time:

Newsweek: “So you’ve seen the movie?”
Madeleine L’Engle: “I’ve glimpsed it.”
Newsweek: “And did it meet expectations?”
Madeleine L’Engle: “Oh, yes. I expected it to be bad, and it is.”

(source: Newsweek)

Disney. Its business model is a vision of global mediocre conformity, value-free, intellect-fee, a universe where the triumph of the brand is all that matters. Make sure to get them young with bland test audience approved animation so that they’ll demand their licensed Miley fuck boots when they graduate demographics. Of course Disney has the rights to this piece of art, if there’s one iron clad law of the universe, it ain’t gravity, it sure as hell isn’t love or hate, it’s that irony always wins.

Fuck you, you pissant little mouse.

(source: SciFi Wire)

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Comments

Well I guess it is just par for the fucking course isn't it? I mean, they've ruined Santa Claus, they make Toys, Toasters, Electronics, Whores, Movies, Comics, Dildos, Storage Buildings full of ruined hope and lost dreams, and provide pedophiles with more fap material than a TLC special.I'm just shocked they havn't made The Giver and ruined my life even fucking more.
So why the fuck not? Why shouldn't they just dig up Walt Goddamn Disney's corpse and just fuck my ENTIRE GODDAMN SHELTERED LIBRARY HAUNTING CHILDHOOD WITH IT??!?

Fuck Dinsey.
Loony Toons were better,
and Bugs Bunny never tried to rape my core values of literature or invade every item in my household.

Posted by: Robb at March 22, 2010 9:27 AM

So help me Disney, if you ruin my favorite childhood book...

Posted by: Dorothy Snarker at March 22, 2010 9:40 AM

Of course Disney will take this book out behind the school and diddle it until it doesn't even remotely resemble the pretty girl we're used to. Then it will give her some pot which we all know is a gateway drug. In about two years we'll barely recognize A Wrinkle in Time.

I do have to ask, who sold the rights to Disney though?

Posted by: admin at March 22, 2010 10:11 AM

I hate you, Disney. You ruin everything you touch. Thanks to you, Narnia is no longer a land of fantasy and wonder to me. Instead, it's an emo world dressed in medieval armor. I can no longer read the first two books in the series without shedding tears at the recollection of their rape by the movies.

And now you want to take your crap-smudged fingers and thumb through the pages of A Wrinkle in Time? NO.

Posted by: Jelinas at March 22, 2010 10:20 AM

What's that sound, you ask
It's the heartbroken yodel of an Austrian L'Engle fan simultaneously sharpening her Schnitzel knife and donning the Lederhosen of War before paddling her snowboard across the ocean to gauge out the eyes of Disney employees and devour them to the tune of "Edelweiss".

Posted by: cinekat at March 22, 2010 10:29 AM

I've been wanting to reread this since I saw it on Sawyer's dresser last week. Now I have even more incentive, to freshen my memory before it dies a slow death.

Disney, I fuckin love your parks. Buuuuut, that's about it. Please get a soul.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at March 22, 2010 10:29 AM

You wrote, "Perhaps the best sign of a work’s wisdom is that is pisses everybody off." I bring this same philosophy to my commenting.

HAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU PAHIBITCHESSS!

No, but seriously, why would a person wrap duct tape around a rat (Mickey)? So that when you fuck it, it doesn't explode.

Posted by: superasente at March 22, 2010 10:31 AM

I will never, ever expose my children (future) to Disney or it's assault on Literature.
My kids will be read the Grimm Fairy tales in their original gory glory. I will make them afraid of the dark and teach them they wont always have a prince or fairy god parent to protect them and make everything okay again.
I wont let my daughters think that being skinny and useless is the way to snag a husband and I wont let my sons think a girl who lies down for him to walk all over is the kind of WIFE he wants.

I wont let Disney warp my children into thinking princesses are forest dwelling white girls who only need a MAN OR OPPOSITE GENDER PARTNER to make their life complete.
This pseudo christian paedo feeding no gay no black no nothing but WASPS machine will not warp my childrens minds and teach them to hate with brightly coloured milk fed oh so precious watered down shite.

Fuck Disney.

Posted by: Nadine at March 22, 2010 10:31 AM

I wish a wrinkle in time would envelop the Disney Corp. and leave them in the void for all eternity. It's wishful thinking,I know, because what would children do without the Rat to guide their actions.

I fucking hate humans sometimes.

Posted by: bignick at March 22, 2010 11:04 AM

I really hate the idea of someone messing with A Wrinkle in Time. It's such a beautiful book... As a sort of geeky little kid, it brought hope to me and made me think beyond all of the bullshit that was part of elementary school. Now Disney is going to introduce that exact sort of bullshit to it. Ugh.

Posted by: b at March 22, 2010 11:21 AM

I can no longer read the first two books in the series without shedding tears at the recollection of their rape by the movies.

Tilda Swinton fucking owned as Jadis. Just sayin.

Posted by: twig at March 22, 2010 12:22 PM

I gotta say, I'm reading this with my third grade class now, and...there's *really* only about 20 minutes worth of movie in here. Most of the book is philosophy, background, and description, but the actual action only happens over a couple of hours. Also, the kids are way more annoying than I remember, and I think I would smack Mr. Murray if I met him in real life.

Posted by: Kat at March 22, 2010 12:24 PM

I remember reading "A Wrinkle In Time" when I was 11 years old. It was the first time I'd read a science fiction novel where the main character was a young girl. I kinda liked it.

I reread it last year. It didn't hold up. I hated it. Boring.

On the other hand, it does begin, "It was a dark and stormy night . . ."

Posted by: BWeaves at March 22, 2010 12:31 PM

Everybody back right the fuck off AWIT - the book that got me going on sci-fi and lead me right to Ellison, Asimov, Bradbury and all the rest. And if you stopped at AWIT, read the third book 'A Wind in the Door'. And read this year's Newbery Medal winner When You Reach Me by Rebecca Stead, loosely based on AWIT.

Posted by: fenchurch at March 22, 2010 12:44 PM

Also, the kids are way more annoying than I remember.
I agree, at least about Meg. She comes off as a real stubborn brat until the end of the book.

The new movie will blow serious ass and hopefully be forgotten. I just love L'Engle's reaction to the first movie. "I expected it to be bad and it is." Haha!

Posted by: Brie at March 22, 2010 12:44 PM

I'm just shocked they havn't made The Giver and ruined my life even fucking more.

Why would you even joke about this? WHY?!? Don't you know casual comments dropped in the Pajibaverse tend to come true? Now they're going to go and fuck my favorite childhood book.

Posted by: Even Stevens at March 22, 2010 12:58 PM

Perhaps the best sign of a work’s wisdom is that is pisses everybody off.

I've got to say, I really really hate this meme.

Thanks, though, for the report of Disnification of one of my favorite books as a kid. Now, I'm prepared.

Posted by: BrianM at March 22, 2010 1:02 PM

I remember when they made that ABC movie. I watched approximately 30 seconds before someone took the remote out of my shaking hand and turned it off. I will NOT watch this one. I'm not sure it's even filmable material, let alone filmable by Disney. This post has, however, made me decide to read all four books again. Think the last time I picked them all up was my mid teens...

Posted by: KatSings at March 22, 2010 1:40 PM

It's not filmable. It's just not. Whether I like the idea or not is irrelevant (although I hate that it is, of course).

A book like Lord of the Rings couldn't be filmed until recently because our technology couldn't keep up with our imagination (I'd argue it still can't), but A Wrinkle in Time is unfilmable because so much of the struggle is internal.

For fuck's sake, there's an entire scene set on a planet with no light. The protagonist is blind the entire time. And the climax of the movie is Meg thinking very hard so as not to be co-opted by IT. It's as tense and moving as any book I've ever read but it's just not filmable.

Fuck the mouse.

Posted by: marya at March 22, 2010 1:49 PM

Dear Mickey,
I love Epcot. I also love the Animal Kingdom and the Magic Kingdom, in that order. But please stop watering down beloved childhood books. Just...step the fuck off.

Sincerely,
Stardust

Posted by: stardust at March 22, 2010 1:57 PM

Posted by: cinekat at March 22, 2010 10:29 AM
-----------------------------------------------
This? Is hilarious.

I also agree that the book/characters don't hold up over time. I re-read it recently and it sort of burst the happy memory bubble I had of the book.

Posted by: Lauren at March 22, 2010 2:28 PM

I thought they already made The Giver into a movie, but they changed everything around and called it Pleasantville.

Posted by: Jim Doggie at March 22, 2010 2:46 PM

Twig, I have to agree with you there, but that only speaks to the ossomness of SWINTON, as The Fug Girls like to call her. It ain't no credit to Disney that they stumbled upon a decent casting for once.

Posted by: Jelinas at March 22, 2010 4:10 PM

At the risk of being eviscerated, you know, you don't have to see it. Then your childhood will remain in tact. In fact, if more people didn't see these shitty adaptations, remakes, sequels, etc maybe Hollywood would quit making them in such numbers.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: mr friendly at March 22, 2010 4:28 PM

It irks me that authors/screenwriters/artists sell the rights to their works to Disney - knowing full well the crap they produce - and then dare act surprised that the adaptation fails to impress. Waaah waaah waaah.

If you don't want Disney to fuck up your work, don't sell them the rights to do so. Should you sell the rights, it's your own damned fault your work is turned to shit. Shut up about it. You cashed the check.

Posted by: monkeyhateclean at March 22, 2010 6:10 PM

Mr. Friendly has clearly lost his mind. Bring in the wagon charlie!

Posted by: superasente at March 22, 2010 7:47 PM

Why do they have to ruin everything they touch? It was one of my favourites :(

Posted by: cyril at December 5, 2010 5:24 AM

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