This Town Needs a Pajiba!
The Weekly Trade Round-Up / The Pajiba Staff
Item #1: At this point, nobody needs to be convinced that Christopher Nolan is a talented filmmaker. Following, Memento, Insomnia; the guy was on a run. But Batman Begins was a truly awesome superhero movie, and not just for its story, design, and dozens of other elements. No, what made it great was that Nolan, instead of making a sequel to what had turned into a laughably cartoonish franchise, opted to reboot the whole thing and start from scratch, telling a detailed origin story that didn’t rely on any particular source but culled from the mythology a solid tale of loss, revenge, and hope. With a tank. That’s ballsy.
Now it’s officially been announced, following rumors that swirled among Comic-Con attendees like word of a Kristen Bell sighting, that sensitive-punk-turned- mopey-knight-turned-gay-ranchhand Heath Ledger will tackle the role of the Joker in Nolan’s Batman sequel, titled The Dark Knight. Granted, Jack Nicholson’s floppy shoes will be hard to fill, but I think Ledger will be able to bring the energy needed to play the psychotic, lipsticked villain. There’s a deleted scene from Brokeback Mountain wherein Ennis, distraught at the fallout of his relationship with Jack, briefly considers poisoning the town’s water supply to turn everyone crazy. Coincidence? Nope. Just good ol’ Hollywood magic. — Daniel Carlson
Item #2: Who else was totally bummed that mainstream flicks like Brokeback Mountain and Angels in America came along and actually depicted homosexuals as real people with (gasp!) actual feelings. Talk about harshing one’s mellow. It’s been too fucking long since Hollywood talked about gay love the way it should be talked about: as a repulsive sodomy punchline. Seriously, it’s been four years (!) now since Cuba Gooding and Horatio Sanz treated us to Boat Trip and, until straight men pretending to be gay for cheap laughs are mainstreamed back into the studio system, I just don’t know how I’m going to go on. Thank God that Kevin James and Adam Sandler are there for us! I for one can’t wait to see I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, a movie about two heterosexual firefighters who pose as a gay couple to collect on the department’s domestic partner benefits. Now, that’s funny! And the great thing is, backwoods rednecks who keep showing up to the polls to vote against same-sex marriage no longer have to rely on Larry the Cable Guy to keep them entertained. What a day! And don’t any of you worry your pretty little heads off; Kevin and Adam don’t actually fall in love. Jessica Biel has been cast to play Adam’s love interest. Titties! Thank God! (Kill me. Kill me now.) — Dustin Rowles
Item #3: Here’s a mixed bag if I’ve ever heard one: David Schwimmer, he who has spent the better part of the last decade moping for laughs, is making his feature directorial debut with Run, Fat Boy, Run, about a man who ditches his fiancee on their wedding day only to realize 10 years later that she’s his one true love. And how does a clueless fat boy win his love back? Run a marathon, of course. Not the highest-concept logline, to be sure, but it is written by Michael Ian Black, who turned his “Ed” gold into a career delivering the best lines on “I Love the ’70s/’80s.” And who will star as the fat man? Simon Pegg. And really, that’s all I needed to hear. — DR
Item #4: I loves me some P.T. Anderson. But, as I recently lamented, he’s among the group of filmmakers that doesn’t seem to work that often. Punch-Drunk Love was an enjoyable departure from his more sprawling, epic style of storytelling, but even that was four years ago. The glory of Magnolia hit theaters in 1999, and Boogie Nights was even two years before that. I’ve been itching for this guy to get back behind the camera ever since Quiz Kid Donnie Smith pretty much broke my heart. First, the good news: his new film, There Will Be Blood (which is a relentlessly cool title), which is currently shooting in Texas and Los Angeles and revolves around a ranching family and their pursuit of oil at the beginning of the 20th century. Now, the slightly disconcerting news: Paul Dano has been cast as a charismatic young preacher in the film. Granted, Dano also currently appears in Little Miss Sunshine, but he’s probably best known as Klitz, the geeky best friend from The Girl Next Door. Yes, his name was Klitz. I’ve got my fingers crossed, though, that Anderson can pull of a minor miracle with the guy. I mean, look what he did for Sandler. — DC
Item #5: Since the TV Whore (or as we call him around the office, T-Ho) is out this week, I’ll be offering up the TV entry as well and, unfortunately, the best I can muster is in slightly interesting casting news. Matt Czuchry, who plays Rory Gilmore’s long-time love interest Logan Huntzberger on “Gilmore Girls,” will do a crossover role on the show in the new CW’s subsequent timeslot, “Veronica Mars.” And who will he play? Logan Echolls’ half-brother, Charlie Stone. Kinda cool, I guess, but I freakin’ hate it when TV shows, even ones as smart as “Veronica Mars,” pull out the estranged half-brothers after going two seasons without a mention. Or, perhaps, Charlie Stone is actually Trina Echolls’ (Alyson Hannigan) new, post-gender-reassignment identity. That, I think, I could get behind. Oh, and for those of you who feared that Amy Sherman-Palladino’s post-“Gilmore Girls” life would involve a soup kitchen and a Times Square cardboard home, fear not: She’s signed on to do a multi-camera sitcom for Fox about two estranged sisters who reunite after one agrees to act as surrogate mom to the other. Oh, and Amy, multi-camera is so 2002. — DR
Item #6: To Chabon fans: In our neverending efforts to pimp the hell out of The Mysteries of Pittsburgh a full year before its release, the latest casting news has Mena Suvari playing Phlox, joining the already-attached Peter Sarsgaard and Sienna Miller. Giddyup. — DR
Item #7: In box office, Miami Vice finally knocked Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest from the top spot over the weekend, netting a solidly unspectacular $25 million, though I haven’t been this disappointed in a director of Michael Mann’s talent since Cameron Crowe ripped rainbows from the sky in Elizabethtown. Pirates did hang on to the second spot, grossing another $20 million to push its overall total to $358 million, and should pass The Passion of Christ and Spider-Man 2 this weekend to land at eighth on the all-time box-office chart. Finally, John Tucker Must Die managed $14 million to arrive at No. 3; and, in a related story, handgun purchases increased tenfold over the weekend.
This weekend, we finally bring you our reviews of Scoop and Little Miss Sunshine before you make your Friday evening movie choices. Phillip will offer up his examination of Descent, and for you Armistead Maupin fans, Jeremy will be reviewing The Night Listener. After two weeks of kiddie flicks, we may be CGI’d out, leaving The Barnyard uncovered, unless someone can find the humor in its tagline, “What Happens in the Barn Stays in the Barn.” Oh, and yeah: I’m cautiously optimistic that Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby will offer some late-season salvation to an otherwise subpar summer for blockbusters, though I have to be honest: I could probably watch the ads for 90 minutes and still be plenty entertained. — DR
Comments
I set my jaw to dropped when I heard about the Heath/Joker thing. But hey, let's not be getting up him too soon - dude's a good actor and I trust Nolan's judgement. It'll certainly be a challenge for Heath and for me it's just another reason to hang out for the next installment. BTW, checked out Memento again the other day. Such a cool film but man, ya gotta work hard to keep up!
Posted by: Uncle Toby at August 3, 2006 4:08 AM
I think that the new Joker will be a little bit more real and less cartoony that it was before so like what they did with Scarecrow. So I can't wait to see what they give Heath and how he plays it.
Posted by: ryan at August 3, 2006 4:30 AM
I've said it before and I'll say it again, "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry" = "Strange Bedfellows".
Plot Outline: Two 'very straight' old timers (Hogan and Caton) have to learn how to pass as a loving gay couple after falsely claiming same-sex status to take advantage of newly leglislated tax laws.
Posted by: Chantelle at August 3, 2006 9:59 AM
Is anyone else bothered that all the (maybe I'm confused here) MALE cows in that Barnyard movie have udders? Are they just very empowered female cows or did somebody not take biology in school?
Posted by: Anne at August 3, 2006 10:19 AM
Thank you, Anne!! That has been driving me nuts since I saw the first ad for this. I'm just praying my daughter doesn't want to see this, since I don't think I would be able to sit in the theater and not yell at the screen (like I do at the TV). Of course, maybe they're transgendered cattle looking for their place in the conservative barnyard world...
Posted by: Karen at August 3, 2006 10:54 AM
Hah! I was just coming down here to make note of 'Strange Bedfellows', Chantelle.
And Anne, my friend noticed that too. When we were at the theatre the other night, she mumbled something about 'transsexual cows'.
#6 - Eek. I just finished reading the book yesterday, and I loved it. Now I can't wait for the movie.
Descent kind of looks like Blair Witch: On the Rocks. Part of me is just hoping that you guys will review "Bon Cop, Bad Cop". (*snortsnort* He's from Montreal.. he's from Toronto. It's funny, right? No. It's not.)
Posted by: Mara at August 3, 2006 12:15 PM
Thank GOD PT Anderson is getting back in the game. I'm actually sort of excited to see Paul Dano in this because, honestly (small voice) I really liked The Girl Next Door (end small voice). I haven't truly forgiven myself, but dammit, I just can't help it.
And speaking of Anderson, despite Punch Drunk Love, which I adore and own, Adam Sandler... grrr... thanks for continuing with the stupidifying of America. Sad thing is, they probably think "Chuck and Larry" is slick film making.
I'd like to hit Adam Sandler.
In the face.
With a shovel.
Posted by: I Love Beets at August 3, 2006 1:15 PM
I love Heath Ledger, I do. I'm sure that he's be a brilliant bit of casting for whatever interpretation Nolan will have for the Joker, and I admire Heath's acting abilities and think he deserves a lot of critical-acclaim and success.
But Paul Bettany deserved the role of the Joker more. I'm just saying.
At least now I think it's guaranteed that Jake Gyllenhaal won't be getting the rumored Harvey Dent/Two Face role. I just don't see him in that role, and no one would be daft enough to make that Brokeback reunion, right? Um. Right?
Posted by: Ann at August 3, 2006 1:24 PM
Boy cows with udders. Why has Sam Elliot sunk so low? I'm not even a farmer and I am so mad I could spit.
Posted by: Capn Gravy at August 3, 2006 1:51 PM
Here's a little knowledge for all of you city kids: When discussing cattle, the females are cows, the intact males are bulls, and the males who have been separated from their male goodies are known as steers. Also, young females that have not had offspring are known as heifers.
My current theory regarding "Barnyard" is that the producers had long tortured meetings about whether it's more disturbing to give a cow a male voice, or a bull the anatomically correct equipment. The resulting compromise is even ickier than could have been anticipated. I hope it comfuses the hell out of children... I really do.
Posted by: BitterB at August 3, 2006 2:12 PM
yes, nothing screams educational like gender confused cattle. they could have at least done a TransAmerica/Animal Farm mix-up, now THAT would be original. communist transvestites overthrowing the capitalist (conservative) farmer pig-dogs and taking control of the slaughterhouse...yes...YES..
Posted by: razh at August 3, 2006 2:21 PM
edit: they could even make it a musical, with transvestite cattle doing a little dance number to the clever retake "It's Raining Beef"
Posted by: razh at August 3, 2006 2:36 PM
Re: Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby ". . . I have to be honest: I could probably watch the ads for 90 minutes and still be plenty entertained."
I seem to agree with the Pajiba's staff tastes in most areas, but definitely not when it comes to Will Ferrell. To me, his humor seems forced and over-the-top, too smug.
This will probably be one of those movies I watch just to see if I still don't get it, but the movie just seems stupid to me.
Posted by: BLanc at August 3, 2006 2:44 PM
BLanc, I totally agree with you. I laughed at most of Will Ferrel's skits on SNL, but with each progressive movie he gets less and less funny.
Oh, and I hate white trash red neck jokes. I won't be laughing a Talladellalgalla Nights
Posted by: Shoogie at August 3, 2006 3:43 PM
I agree with BLanc: What the fock is the big deal about Will Ferrell? He did stand out a bit on SNL, but it's not like that's difficult.
In "person"--that is, on talk shows and such--he's a surprisingly funny and entertaining man. But all his film roles seem to be repeats of the schtick he did in Dick. (It was funny. The first time.)
Posted by: Jerce at August 3, 2006 3:48 PM
I asked a young woman in the right age group who Sienna Miller was, and she replied, "I have no idea".
Posted by: Hoyt Vandenberg at August 3, 2006 3:57 PM
"But Paul Bettany deserved the role of the Joker more. I'm just saying."
I was in the camp rooting for Crispin Glover. Being a (oh, gosh, get ready for it) geek, I know a little about the backstory of the Joker, mainly that he was a frail, feeble, failed stand-up comedian (um, sorry about the alliteration) who went bat-shit insane after one bad (well, actually really bad) day. Basically, he started out as George McFly. And then went crazy. But, being that Heath actually is a talented actor, I'm curious about how all of this will turn out. Regardless, I'm going to see this movie.
Posted by: Cody at August 3, 2006 5:37 PM
Uh, I was quoting Ann, by the way.
Posted by: Cody at August 3, 2006 5:39 PM
Crispin Hellion Glover would have made a great Joker, but Heath Ledger will do just fine I'm sure.
Posted by: Adam C at August 3, 2006 6:49 PM
lets see, ANOTHER BATMAN, ANOTHER SUPERMAN.for me i`ll pass on the same old tired shit movies and lean more towards the unknown tired shit movies, the descent, ricky bobby . I DID see V for vendetta on video, now theres some fresh original compelling story telling,rent V you won`t be yawning at all
Posted by: pasadenamike at August 3, 2006 10:07 PM
#2: And don't any of you worry your pretty little heads off; Kevin and Adam don't actually fall in love. Jessica Biel has been cast to play Adam's love interest. Titties! Thank God! Holy Fuck. I love you guys. I love you guys so much.
Posted by: tetetetigi at August 3, 2006 10:32 PM
I've heard good things about Heath Ledger, but the Joker? Come on. Andy Dick was BORN to play this role; putting anyone else in it is a tragic mistake.
Posted by: PenDragon at August 4, 2006 2:31 AM
I've read the book, and Dano is actually not a bad choice for the role. As you say, P.T. gets great performances out of his actors. Regardless, the preacher role isn't that large (at least it wasn't in the book), and I suspect that the usual P.T. ensemble will be coming aboard for some of the more important parts.
Posted by: Rob at August 4, 2006 4:48 PM
Cody:
There is NO definitive origin story for the Joker. The one you quoted was from an anthology of origin stories that a bunch of writers dreamed up for him.
Posted by: Chris W at August 6, 2006 4:50 PM
Your standard heterosexist fare...how am I not surprised that a "homosexual" film gets turned into a romp fest with Jessica Biel...someone should kill me now! As for Heath being the Joker, I would have preferred Alan Cummings, someone with a little more stage presence like Jack Nicholson, who is very difficult to top of course.
Posted by: Gina at August 7, 2006 12:01 PM
Well, miracles upon miracles - I agree with Gina. I think Alan Cumming would have made a great choice for The Joker. I like Heath Ledger well enough, but I'm not feeling him as the Joker. I'm not sure he can pull off batshit crazy. Jack Nicholson was great because he was completely over the top, which worked for Burton's version. I'm sure Nolan will go the more subtle route, but you still have to get someone who can believably pull it off. Heath isn't the person that springs to mind. Frankly, I didn't think Cillian Murphy really sold Scarecrow as a villain. He did a better job of doing so, IMO, in Red Eye. In any case, I look forward to being proven wrong about Heath.
Posted by: Daphne at August 7, 2006 2:25 PM
Can't even do full frontal nudity on an animated bull?
Sad.
Posted by: MaiGirl at August 8, 2006 4:48 PM
Boy cows. With udders.
Oy.
If they just left the udders off, everything would have been fine. One of the ''cows'' is voiced by Sam frickin Elliot.
Posted by: Meander at August 12, 2006 7:07 PM