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You're The Man Now, Dog: Hollywood's Best Race-Based Historical Films

By TK | Seriously Random Lists | October 24, 2013 | Comments ()


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Geronimo: An American Legend
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The Power of One
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The Last King of Scotland
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The Last Samurai
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The Last of the Mohicans
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Mississippi Burning
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The Flowers of War
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Dangerous Minds
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The Impossible
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The Help
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Glory
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The Blind Side
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Dances With Wolves
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Comments Are Welcome, Douches Are Not


  • strand0410

    "White Man is the best Indian."

  • brian

    wasn't there an article like this posted around the same time as the Jackie Robinson movie.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Memoirs of a Geisha.

  • Jiffylush

    Not historical but...

    Joel Grey in Remo Williams, the eyes, the accent, they lack of Rs, you kind of have to see it.

    For anyone who doesn't know who Joel Grey is: Famous stage performer, well known for Cabaret, he was so famous that he was on the Muppets, the pinnacle of celebrity endorsement at that time. He is also Jennifer Grey's father (nobody puts baby in a corner).

  • AngelenoEwok

    "He is also Jennifer Grey's father (nobody puts baby in a corner)."

    WHAT. HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS. THIS SEEMS LIKE A VERY IMPORTANT DETAIL.

  • ZbornakSyndrome

    Anna and the King of Siam, because nothing says Asian like Rex Harrison.

    Also Orson Wells as Othello, anyone?

  • e jerry powell

    Between Yul Brynner and Rita Moreno (not to mention the fact that the whole thing is about the civilizing influence of the British), it follows that we would also include The King and I.

  • Mrs. Julien

    Laurence Olivier as Othello. Pretty much anyone as Othello except about 4 people.

    And, of course, John Wayne as Genghis Khan. And Katharine Hepburn in The Good Earth. This list could go on a bit. I'll just leave it at that.

  • lowercase_ryan

    How the hell is Steven Spielberg not on this list?

  • e jerry powell

    Because his race picture had fewer than five white characters in it, who took less than five minutes of screen time.

  • Erica O.

    I'm all out of alabaster and egg shell. Y'all got any other colors I can use to white wash history?

  • e jerry powell

    Ecru will work nicely.

  • Guest

    Seven Years in Tibet & Little Buddha.

  • stella

    Im sensing some kind of pattern here but I cant quite put my finger on it.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    Also: RACE WAR!!!!!

    We haven't had a good one of those in a while.

  • lowercase_ryan

    What's a nubian?

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Why, this is.

  • Mrs. Julien

    I love you, and not, not in a friendly way, although I think we’re great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I’m sure that’s what you’ll call it. I love you, very, very simple, very truly. You are the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider, but I had to say it. I just… I can’t take this anymore. I can’t stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can’t look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can’t talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably queer our friendship, no pun intended, but I had to say it. ‘Cause I’ve never felt this way before and I don’t care; I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means that we can’t be friends anymore, then that hurts me. But, God, I just, I couldn’t allow another day to go by without just getting it out there. Regardless of the outcome which, by the look on your face, is the inevitable shoot down. And you know, I’ll accept that. But I know, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment. And if there’s a moment of hesitation then that means you feel something too and all I ask, please, that you just not just dismiss that. Try to dwell in it for just 10 seconds. (pause) Alyssa, there isn’t another single soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I’m with you. And I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau because it is there between you and me. You can’t deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you have meant to me, which, while I do appreciate it, I’d never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of. [Alyssa gets out of the car] Oh God, was it something I said?

  • ZbornakSyndrome

    I loved that movie so much, and watched that speech so often that I killed my VHS copy. Still my favorite Affleck performance.

  • lowercase_ryan

    I love that. It felt real (if angsty) to me. And I can now say that it really sucks when Alyssa never talks to you again.

  • Mrs. Julien

    It's one of the great "I Love You" speeches. It took me forever to transcribe by rewinding and pausing my VHS tape.

  • Wigamer

    Ooooh---let's do other great "I love you" speeches!

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    I could really use some saltines right now.

  • Pants_are_a_must

    And now, infomercials!

  • I'm just going to leave this here for you guys... http://www.theonion.com/video/...

  • $3647259

    For a brief moment I thought that was Morrissey -- or Danny Boyle.

    Seriously, I have to stop staring at Denzel's picture.

  • TenaciousJP

    This list pales without any mention of Prince of Persia.

  • Rob

    Is it bad that I'm sad Glory is on the list?

  • Wigamer

    Glory is amazing. I'm sorry, but I don't think it belongs.

  • Bea Pants

    I kind of feel the same about Mississippi Burning. There's some stellar acting performances turned in by all involved. It's a shame about the whitewashing.

  • BWeaves

    The Last Airbender?

  • Guest

    Not "Historical" but true none the less.

    I'd add Jake Sully - Avatar because who knows it could happen.

  • BWeaves

    AH, right, historical. Some of these were a bit too recent to be considered historical in my mind, so I forgot that bit.

  • Guest

    This post is similar to another post Pajiba did not too long ago (which I can't find).

    The addition of "Historical" is the only thing that makes it different.

  • specialj67

    *golf clap*

  • Everything's gonna be all white, people!

  • I'm sensing a pattern, but I can't white put my finger on it.

  • Mrs. Julien

    There's that scathing and bitchy I've been looking for.

    Did you have it locked in your basement, TK?

  • Nunchucko

    I see what you did there. Well played TK. It took three screen caps. I need more coffee

  • csb

    I had to get to The Help before I knew for sure. Not proud it took so long.

  • $3647259

    I'm really embarrassed to admit that it took me all screen caps AND your comment (scrolling down, then up, then down again) to realize what was going on so...I may need more than coffee.

    But in my defense, I lost the ability to think rationally after I stared at that banner picture for 3 minutes solid.

  • ZbornakSyndrome

    Yeah, I'm with you on the banner. It's unfair to expect rational thought right after showing me that picture.

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