The Pajiba Ten -- 1985 Edition

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (59)

Two of the three top movies of 1985 had Sylvester Stallone in them (Rambo First Blood: Part II and Rocky IV), while the biggest box office hit of the year was Back to the Future. Out of Africa won Best Picture, although it was The Color Purple that most won over audiences and critics alike. “The Cosby Show,” and “Family Ties,” were dominating the television airwaves, and Wham! and Madonna were dominant forces on cassette. “We are the World,” of course, was on constant rotation. Kids loved Pound Puppies. Teenagers loved Goonies. Lightweights loved Bartles and Jaymes. And these were the faces of pinups hung in every high school locker.

Markie Post

Kirk Cameron

Tom Selleck

Matt Dillon

The Coreys

Rob Lowe

Alyssa Milano

Ralph Machio

Kelly LeBrock

Michael Schoeffling

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Comments

OMG I was sooooo in love with Kirk Cameron at that time. I had posters of him all over my walls. After Growing pains he went on to some kooky end of the world films that are horribly fantastic.

Posted by: Danielle Lilly at September 1, 2010 3:14 PM

Oh Alyssa, though we can't be together, we'll always have Embrace of the Vampire

Posted by: admin at September 1, 2010 3:14 PM

You led me to believe Michael J Fox would be on this list.
Damn you, sir. Damn you.

Posted by: squeeziee at September 1, 2010 3:14 PM

I like 1985. Mostly because it's the year in which I happened.

My Pajiba 1 for 1985 = Andrew McCarthy. Le sigh.

Posted by: Courtney at September 1, 2010 3:15 PM

Tom Selleck is so MANLY. They don't make masculinity like that anymore.

Posted by: Squirt at September 1, 2010 3:16 PM

James. Spader.

Yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Posted by: MG at September 1, 2010 3:18 PM

How can you not put Leah Thompson on this list? C'mon!

Posted by: RobP at September 1, 2010 3:19 PM

Dang. Who knew Markie Post had that body under those lawyer suits on Night Court? Also, I think it's "Macchio"...*quickly scurries to IMDB*...Yep. Two Cs.

And I'm with Admin: Mmmm...Embrace of the Vampire.

Posted by: Snorklewacker at September 1, 2010 3:23 PM

Ah Mr. Schoeffling- you still look purrfect. And I submit, its no small co-inky-dink that the young men still try to wear their hair like yours....

Posted by: JuiceinLA at September 1, 2010 3:24 PM

Molly Ringwald, Ally Sheedy, Demi Moore, Leah Thompson.....

Posted by: Kahntahmp at September 1, 2010 3:26 PM

It was all about the Selleck back then. Well, the Selleck and the fading supernova that was my Harrison Ford phase with an occasional side of Sam Elliott (oh, yes, the Sam Elliott lust runs long and deep in me and,yes, that is exactly what she said). Selleck though - Selleck was physically-perfect to my university student eyes in 1986/1987. I watched a whole lot Magnum reruns during that time. Soooo delicious.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 1, 2010 3:29 PM

What MG said.

Posted by: Samantha at September 1, 2010 3:30 PM

No Brooke Shields or Phoebe Cates?

Posted by: cfar1 at September 1, 2010 3:31 PM

Speaking of Kelly Le Brock, Mr. Julien still offers to butter my muffin.

I also loved a young, snaggle-toothed Nicholas Cage in 1985. My poor best friend and the films I dragged her to see.

And Cary Grant. The classics never die.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 1, 2010 3:32 PM

Tom Selleck is so MANLY. They don't make masculinity like that anymore.

Posted by: Squirt at September 1, 2010 3:16 PM

______________________

*looks at reflection*

Ohhh yes they do.

Posted by: Kballs at September 1, 2010 3:34 PM

Sorry, I guess the movies I was misremembering were from earlier in the 80's. Fast Times was 82 and Gremlins 84. I still remember those posters more than the others though.

Posted by: cfar1 at September 1, 2010 3:36 PM

Ralph Forever! xoxoxoxxo

Posted by: replica at September 1, 2010 3:37 PM

Mickey Rourke. He was the pin-up of 1985 for those of us who like bad boys.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 1, 2010 3:42 PM

You know, I really thought that Markie Post had a bigger rack than that. Weird. Perhaps they padded her bras on Night Court?

Posted by: tamatha at September 1, 2010 3:50 PM

What the hell is going on with Markie's face?? Is it sexual? Is it seductive? Does she have loooong blinks? Was she channeling the Helen Keller as a sex pot angle? "Night Court" was the shit. Is it on DVD? If it isn't, it should be.

Corey :(

Rob Lowe, I would have starred in a sex tape with you in '85.

Alyssa, you were one of my hetero celeb crushes!!! xoxoxo

Posted by: Barnes78 at September 1, 2010 3:53 PM

Jason Bateman was on my list in 1985, and he's on my list now. He's timeless.

Posted by: katy at September 1, 2010 3:54 PM

Erin Grey. Ohhh, Erin Grey. I'd like to play a little Buck Rogers with 80's era Erin.

Posted by: The Other Agent Johnson at September 1, 2010 3:59 PM

Hey Katy! I was gonna mention Jason Bateman, too. I've had the hots for him since the late 80s and I still have dreams about him. I think he's my longest-standing celebrity crush.

Posted by: kate the great at September 1, 2010 4:00 PM

Oh, year that I was born... :-)

Posted by: KatSings at September 1, 2010 4:03 PM

80s WEEK! WHAT??? YAYAYAYAY! I WAS 15 in 1985!!!

Anyway, ahem. Sorry about that. This is so totally gnarly. Especially your #10 entry up there.

:drool:

Posted by: Snuggiepants at September 1, 2010 4:16 PM

What's with all the dudes!?

Heather Thomas? Anybody? The Fall Guy?
Elizabeth Shue?
Phoebe Cates?

Posted by: professor_love at September 1, 2010 4:20 PM

Elisabeth Shue?
Princess Leia in her slave costume?
Leslie Easterbrook (the lady cop with the big rack from Police Academy)?
Kerri Green?

Posted by: henchman for hire at September 1, 2010 4:28 PM

Is anybody else following the news this afternoon? A guy has taken hostages at the HQ of the Discovery channel and among his demands is the following:

"All programs on Discovery Health-TLC must stop encouraging the birth of any more parasitic human infants and the false heroics behind those actions. In those programs' places, programs encouraging human sterilization and infertility must be pushed. All former pro-birth programs must now push in the direction of stopping human birth, not encouraging it."

Em, has anyone checked on the whereabouts of BarbadoSlim this afternoon?

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 1, 2010 4:31 PM

Ah, high waisted diaper bikinis. Nice to see she has real boobs.

I just saw that Discovery Channel thing on CNN.com. Why didn't the guy take hostages at The Litter Channel (TLC)?

Posted by: BWeaves at September 1, 2010 4:38 PM

BWeaves:

Apparently Discovery owns the litter channel so he went to the source.

And those high-waisted bikinis were horrendous. Nobody looked good in them.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 1, 2010 4:49 PM

Paddy Too bad the guy's probably bonkers because it isn't as if a lot of us weren't thinking it about TLC!

Posted by: Snuggiepants at September 1, 2010 4:50 PM

Snuggie:

It appears from his manifesto that he is more nutty than you can possibly imagine.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 1, 2010 4:56 PM

My Pajiba 1 for 1985 = Andrew McCarthy. Le sigh.

HELL.YES.

Posted by: grace b at September 1, 2010 4:59 PM

Agreed - Lea Thompson belongs here. Alyssa Milano and Markie Post did both have my ridiculously young lustful attention back around that time too. Of course, in 1985 Alyssa was only 13.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at September 1, 2010 5:14 PM

I don't remember... oh right, I was in a uterus.

Posted by: Vi at September 1, 2010 5:21 PM

POUND PUPPIES!!! Oh, and Rob Lowe was really freakin' hot in 1985.

Posted by: meaux at September 1, 2010 5:21 PM

Excellent call on Markie Post. I can remember when the network slugs who made "The Fall Guy" finally figured out the hot one on the show wasn't Heather Thomas - who was obviously expressly there just for that purpose - but rather Markie Post and started putting her in outrageous outfits.

Thanks for guiding me through puberty Markie. Rawr.

-Frob

Posted by: frobme at September 1, 2010 5:29 PM

Markie Post? Really? Ok.

I gotta second Kerri Green.

And, hey, what about Helen Slater?

Seriously, using that header picture when neither Leah Thompson or Michael J. Fox make the list isn't fair.

Posted by: lubeg at September 1, 2010 5:51 PM

I, too, loved and love James Spader, but he wasn't really heartthrob status then - too threatening, I think.

I also loved C. Thomas Howell.

Posted by: samantha t at September 1, 2010 6:29 PM

1985 gave us Return of the Living Dead and Fright Night as well as Day of the Dead; all classics now in horror. the second elm street movie came out, Catseye too. . .i snuck into lot of horror movies back in the day. Re-Animator came out that year, but i think i only found it on vid a couple years later.

also Breakfast Club and Brazil, After Hours, Turk 182 and Falcon and the Snowman. Starchaser: Legend of Orin and Enemy Mine. Real Genius and pee-wees big adventure. mad max beyond thunderdome. Ladyhawke. Jewel of the Nile. and Legend of Billie Jean(i suspect this one wouldnt stand up to a repeated viewing but i remember loving it at the time). Red Sonja.

it was a pretty fun year for being at the movies

Posted by: idleprimate at September 1, 2010 7:23 PM

and Remo Williams!

Posted by: idleprimate at September 1, 2010 7:27 PM

The hell? Where the fuck is James Spader?

Forgetful motherfu--I feel like driving to wherever it is that you live and beating you to death with a can of FinalNet™.

Posted by: Jerce at September 1, 2010 8:49 PM

I was also 15 in 1985. Trying to recall my four walls covered in tattered pics ripped from magazine (mom drew the line at pictures on the ceiling).... Mostly musicians as I recall. But I had room for:

Patrick Swayze (still obsessed by the Outsiders, and Red Dawn, although I never watched North and South)

Kyle MacLachlan (I think I'm the only person in the world who loved 'Dune' the movie.

Mikhail Baryshnikov (sigh...White Nights. I have no earthly recollection of what happened in that movie, but MB was the shit).

Posted by: malechai at September 1, 2010 9:09 PM

Also...
In 1985 James Spader was not hot. You can think he's hot now, but he totally wasn't then. I checked IMDB even. Check out his credits up to and including 1985. Nada.

Posted by: malechai at September 1, 2010 9:11 PM

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Posted by: blackwhiteromance.com at September 1, 2010 9:21 PM

Only the 'little people' would forget to mention Leona Helmsley, Queen of the Wet Dream Cream.

Mmm, do I really need that pleural membrane that I have mysteriously coughed up?

Posted by: Jo 'Mama' Besser at September 1, 2010 9:29 PM

how did my first love not make this list!?! Where the hell is Bruce Willis (David Addison)!?! Moonlighting was awesome.

Ditto for 80's Spader. Makes me said that he has puffy jowls and too much pussy face now.

Ugh, please never remind me of the time I actually thought that Kirk Cameron was cool, it really just makes me sad and ashamed.

Posted by: Mebe at September 2, 2010 12:06 AM

I don't know about you all, but Alyssa Milano is still in my ten. She is also hands-down one of the best twitterers/tweeters? around.

Totally agree with TOAJ on Erin Gray. I'd add Beverly D'Angelo as well.

Posted by: The Retronaut at September 2, 2010 12:41 AM

Who the hell are the Coreys?

Posted by: , at September 2, 2010 1:13 AM

Never got over Ms. Milano.

As for Markie Post. Markie Fuckin Post!!! Really?

Posted by: EJ at September 2, 2010 5:10 AM

21 Jumpstreet's Johnny Depp? River Phoenix from that film where he plays Harrison Ford's son? Patrick Swayze - "North & South" was huge in Europe, as was of course Dirty Dancing.
Thank God I burned all my '80s photos. Blackmail material galore.

Posted by: cinekat at September 2, 2010 7:36 AM

Michael Schoeffling......be still my beating heart.....

Posted by: courtney at September 2, 2010 11:25 AM

Kerri Green? Really?
Not that it matters, but I went to college with her and she was NOT a bright bulb...her relationship with Charlie Sheen backs up this theory.

Posted by: vassargirl at September 2, 2010 11:30 AM

That picture of Alyssa Milano cannot be from the 80's. I call foul.

Posted by: andy at September 2, 2010 12:20 PM

Come on, no Spader! James Spader had creepy, slimy, sexy douchebaggery on lockdown during the 80s and I absolutely loved him for it.

Posted by: allheavens at September 2, 2010 3:43 PM

Markie Post? What the...I think she was a little too old to be on teenager's radar back then, or at least appeared so on Night Court...I never heard one single boy proclaim her hotness.

You guys are right about James Spader. Back in his heyday, I never thought he was hot. I drool when I watch Pretty in Pink now, but back then I was all about Andrew McCarthy, and I think James was just TOO mean to be considered hot. We all loved Kirk Cameron, for God's sake. The nice boys definitely came out ahead back then.

Posted by: tinmo at September 2, 2010 5:47 PM

when i saw breakfast club i fell badly in love with ally sheedy. is that wierd since she was the creepy antisocial girl who played with her dandruff?

Posted by: idleprimate at September 2, 2010 8:31 PM

Sexy Rob Lowe with those lips...mmmmm...baby! I had Corey Haim's posters tacked up all over my room back in the day. I was really crazy about him too...oh well...he is long gone...drugs r bad!

Posted by: ph at September 5, 2010 4:02 PM

I love the opinions on this site, it definitely gives it that community feel!

Posted by: Rheumatoid at January 5, 2011 3:54 PM

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The Pajiba Ten -- 1985 Edition

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