The First 5 People I'd Consider If I Were Casting Satan in a Film in Which the Devil Lives Among Us

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (59)

Tilda Swinton

Eddie Redmayne

Sean Whalen

Bill Murray

Norman Reedus

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No Kris Jenner?

Posted by: sun dried tomatoes at January 10, 2012 3:09 PM

To quote Frasier re: Kris Jenner:

It's not like she worships The Devil.

Of course not, HE WORHIPS HER!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at January 10, 2012 3:12 PM

I have no idea who Kris Jenner is. Wasn't he an Olympic skater?

Posted by: Dustin Rowles at January 10, 2012 3:20 PM

Okay, I'll play your little game, Dustin. Kris Jenner is Mama Kardashian, mother to Kim et al. She is the evil genius behind their lucrative famewhoring. She is married to former Olympic Decathlete Bruce Jenner.

I hate you for making me acknowledge that I know that, Dustin. I will now, metaphorically, run histrionically from the room, flounce into my room and slam the door behind me!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at January 10, 2012 3:25 PM

Paul Bettany

Posted by: DominaNefret at January 10, 2012 3:28 PM

Ah, Norman...Yes.

Posted by: Bob Frapples at January 10, 2012 3:29 PM

Tilda Swinton always gets my bet, and to boot, Cate Blanchett as the daughter of Satan.

Posted by: Jerry at January 10, 2012 3:32 PM

Peter Stormare as Lucifer in Constantine is five-odd minutes of cinematic perfection. Not saying the rest of the movie is worthy of it, just saying.

Posted by: MM at January 10, 2012 3:37 PM

I'm sorry, Tom Waits is the perfect Satan to ever be Satan , and I'm so happy we got to see that in Imaginarium, regardless of what you thought of the film. He was so fantastic.

Posted by: Theseus at January 10, 2012 3:37 PM

Rachel McAdams.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at January 10, 2012 3:38 PM

no kris je... oh.

Posted by: gp at January 10, 2012 3:44 PM

^^^^
Made me think of Cillian Murphy.

Posted by: sars at January 10, 2012 3:44 PM

I would seriously love to see BM as Satan. Really. Really, really.

Posted by: Candee at January 10, 2012 3:46 PM

Don't forget Tilda Swinton was in Constantine with Peter Stormare, she played the angel Gabriel

Posted by: Sean at January 10, 2012 3:51 PM

Viggo Mortensen made for a really creepy Satan.

Posted by: The Kilted Yaksman at January 10, 2012 3:55 PM

You know, I loved Constantine. anytime it is on I will sit and watch it. And yes, Peter Stormare was fantastic as Satan. Hell, even Keanu was good in it.

Totally love Norman Reedus, there is just something about that guy... you can almost smell him. Ah... sulfur and body odor.If you bottled it, it would be called "A Touch of Satan".

Posted by: MRod at January 10, 2012 3:55 PM

Gary Oldman, of course.

...or is that too 'on the nose'?

Posted by: OldSchool60 at January 10, 2012 3:57 PM

I'm kind of hurt that I wasn't mentioned.

Posted by: admin at January 10, 2012 4:01 PM

Eddie Redmayne.

Because that ginger demon *has* to be asking for it. That's like a Marylin'd up Lohan exclaiming Ima Gulper isn't at all a stage name with all the acting ability she can muster.

Posted by: idiosynchronic at January 10, 2012 4:07 PM

I don't know. I think if it is supposed to be The Devil you can't go with someone who looks like Evil Ed. It has to be someone stunningly beautiful or devastatingly handsome and very very sexy.
And since I can think of noone else the devil couple incarnate themselves. Angelina and Brad at their sexy peaks. But you have to include the multicultural brood they now hold in their arms.

Posted by: daria at January 10, 2012 4:16 PM

Gary Oldman, of course.

...or is that too 'on the nose'?

Posted by: OldSchool60 at January 10, 2012 3:57 PM

________________________

I was going to say Denzel.

That is, if you don't already consider Det. Alonzo Harris as a demon.

Posted by: PG13 at January 10, 2012 4:26 PM

SURELY YOU CAN'T BE LEAVING OUT AL PACINO?! HE HAS SO MANY NAMES!

Posted by: Bert at January 10, 2012 4:29 PM

Sean Whalen cannot play the Devil.

The man is a walking, talking Sponge Monkey. You cannot take a man seriously enough as the Prince of Darkness when his face is a permanent mask for Quizno Subs' worst ad campaign. And lest you think I'm being cruel, just who do you think he made a deal with to get this type of attention? It's not our fault he didn't bother to read the fine print that Mephistopheles is famous for. He may be able to portray many things but believable Beelzebub ain't one of them.

"We Like The Moon", indeed.

Hey, for all we know Lucifer really has the physique of Paul Reubens, the voice of Roger Rabbit and the height of Billy Barty. But I'm of the perhaps prejudiced line of thinking that if you're going to portray the Master of the Damned, you might as well have someone who can ooze wickedness, charm, and power at the same time. To that end your actor can look like anyone at all, but if he or she looks like a breathing cartoon character, I don't care if they roast babies on a spit, you won't be able to fully take them seriously and with which you don't have a Devil, you have an evil fool.

Posted by: bleujayone at January 10, 2012 4:39 PM

Needs: sardonic wit, ability to convey detached sense of superiority, skills of seduction, barely suppressed disdain and/or rage.

Now that I've summarized my resume, let's move on:

Tilda - check
Bill Murray - check

New to mix, three of these:

RDJ
Garret Dillahunt
Sam Elliot
Olyphant
Clive
B Cumberbatch
Watanabe

Posted by: Tao at January 10, 2012 4:47 PM

Sam Elliott! I know he gives me devilish thoughts!

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at January 10, 2012 4:51 PM

Josh Holloway. Extremely hot, does menacing very well, and has a Southern accent to boot.

Posted by: luthien26 at January 10, 2012 4:56 PM

I watched "Constantine" this weekend (have seen several times before) and yeah, Stormare is a pretty awesome Satan. And the Swinton makes a good angel, too. Highly enjoyable movie.

Posted by: Slash at January 10, 2012 5:28 PM

Would make a good cinematic Satan:

- Walton Goggins
- Katey Sagal
- Christina Hendricks
- Charlize Theron
- Patton Oswalt - he looks so friendly and unthreatening and he's charming and funny, which would be really helpful traits if you're Satan
- Denzel Washington
- Ellen Page - because she's tiny and cute, she's like the human version of a kitten
- Glenn Close
- Anthony Hopkins

Posted by: Slash at January 10, 2012 5:42 PM

Be still my beating heart for that Awesome Frasier Quote Mrs Julian! I always loved BeBe

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at January 10, 2012 5:50 PM

Eddie Redmayne's the devil, you say?

Get thee behind me, Satan--or under, over, whatever . . . I'm flexible.

Posted by: Heather Mooney at January 10, 2012 5:57 PM

I think the devil should manifest as different actors. If I had to choose one, I would say Bill Murray, because he would do it fun, or Tilda Swinton, because her body isn't human.

Posted by: John G. at January 10, 2012 6:08 PM

Who's the guy in the header pic? And I nominate Anna Kendrick. You'd never see her coming. She'd be all bright-eyed and pretty and before you know it, oops, she's the devil.

Posted by: Lucas at January 10, 2012 6:12 PM

John O'Hurley. Because Satan should be able to dance and look great in a tux, all the better to be seducing mankind ...

Which kind of reminds me:

Simon Cowell

Gordon Ramsey

Hugh Laurie

Posted by: , at January 10, 2012 6:35 PM

ALAN RICKMAN.

Yes, all caps. Why has no one mentioned this sooner?

Posted by: LB at January 10, 2012 7:05 PM

Al and Jack were the best Satans and cannot be improved upon IMO.

But I'll play your game, sure.

Kelsey Grammer.

and

of course,

William Fichner.

/drops the mic, walks out.

Posted by: Skyler Durden at January 10, 2012 7:13 PM

Katherine Heigl or Christopher Walken

Posted by: blacksred at January 10, 2012 7:54 PM

Robert Deniro was a pretty brilliant Lucifer

Posted by: sailboat at January 10, 2012 8:46 PM

Watanabe

Posted by: Tao at January 10, 2012 4:47 PM

Long Duk Dong?

Posted by: krix at January 10, 2012 8:48 PM

The Kilted Yaksman beat me to it. Viggo was awesome as Lucifer in The Prophecy. I simultaneous turned on and terrified when he was trembling, saying "I love you more than Jesus" with a bloody human heart in his hand.

I'm a complicated woman.

Posted by: Viking at January 10, 2012 8:58 PM

Marion Cotillard
Salma Hayek
Joseph Fiennes
Geoffrey Rush

Posted by: Colin at January 10, 2012 9:03 PM

Still pretty fond of Mark Pellegrino, but I like the idea of Eddie Redmayne.

Posted by: Delilah at January 10, 2012 10:57 PM

Mmmm...Satan Reedus...

I'll be in my bunk.

Posted by: Tilly at January 10, 2012 11:51 PM

Norman Reeeduss uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnghhhh. Sorry. He...oh my word he'd be a sexy devil

Posted by: Nadine at January 11, 2012 3:33 AM

If any of you saw the BBC series "Hex", Fassbender rocked the fallen angel part. But I'd love to see Cate Blanchett tackle the part.

Posted by: cinekat at January 11, 2012 3:34 AM

cinekat, Hex is about the only thing I ever enjoyed him in (he's gorgeous now but I found him far more interesting in hex). I think he'd make a more...emotional, sort of tormented devil? Reedus would be all about sex and danger,

Posted by: Nadine at January 11, 2012 3:44 AM

I saw Sean Whalen three years ago at Costco in Marina Del Rey. He was wearing a black apron, and selling and demonstrating a brand of blenders and speaking to the health benefits of all the fruity concoctions it could offer. I turned to my wife and said, "Dude that's the guy from The People Under The Stairs!"

So no, I can't see him as the devil.

Posted by: James at January 11, 2012 4:11 AM

Steve Buscemi.
Think about it. It´s perfect.

Posted by: jukxs at January 11, 2012 9:03 AM

Best Devil Ever is probably John Glover.

He played lucifer in a show called brimstone, but nearly all of his character have that eerie likeability with a core of pure evil.

Back in the 80's there was a movie (and a book) called "The Chocolate War". John Glover's character was possibly one of the best portraits of soul destroying evil in a long time.

He did another near-satanic character in this weird Roy Schider movie called "52 Pick-up" (which also had lots of beautiful shots of a 1967 e-type Jag, but I digress).

His characters seem to know the weakness of the protagonist almost instinctually; you can feel him sizing up the hero, finding the weakness, and then exploiting it over and over and over. Be it vanity, shame, desire it doesn't matter - Glover has your number.

In short, John Glover does the kind of Satan that makes you want to take a shower, but you know you can't scrub deep enough to get the stain out of your soul.

Posted by: Pragmatist at January 11, 2012 9:50 AM

Ray Wise was an awesome Satan on a mediocre show. Reaper, wasn't it? DeNiro is my favorite that has already played him. SWINTON would definitely be good, although I do like the idea of a sweet and harmless looking lucifer as well.

Posted by: Poptart at January 11, 2012 9:52 AM

I was always under the impression that Satan was an attractive, smooth talking man. A con man. That's the only way he could get someone to do evil willingly. If Satan is scary, then you're just going to run the minute you see him coming, and promise to be good for the rest of your life. No, Satan has to be smooth and hot, and not give himself away. There's a reason men tend to think hot women are the devil incarnate. "Get thee your burka on, wench, before you drive me to do something evil."

Posted by: BWeaves at January 11, 2012 10:04 AM

Jeff Goldblum was a perfect Devil in "Mister Frost". It's one of his most memorable roles IMO.

Posted by: foolsage at January 11, 2012 12:24 PM

Ray Wise did a great devil on Reaper

Posted by: Even Stevens at January 11, 2012 1:01 PM

Perhaps a black cat, a la The Master and Margarita.

Posted by: MRod at January 11, 2012 2:23 PM

Betty White.

Posted by: hippyherb at January 11, 2012 2:54 PM

No Cillian Murphy?

Oh I see what you did there, you went for the younger Eddie Redmayne version.

Posted by: faintingviolet at January 11, 2012 3:37 PM

I know there's a perfect list out there, but all I could come up with was:

Flat-out dark
Laurence Fishburne
Daniel Day-Lewis
Alan Ford
Benicio Del Toro
Christopher Walken

Definitely, maybe
Stellan Skarsgaard
Sam Rockwell

Maybe, but probably not
Giovanni Ribisi
Karl Urban

Most likely to go hammy
Clint Eastwood
Nick Nolte
William Hurt
Mel Gibson

'Cuz, why the hell not
Paul Giamatti

And simply because
Good old Mr. Fiennes, the elder

Posted by: Johnnyboy at January 11, 2012 9:31 PM

Norman Reedus would be a very sexy Beelzebub. And it would make sense to cast him as such a figure, given his recent video music dalliance with anti-Christesque Lady Gaga. That photo of Sean Whalen is the scariest crap I have seen in a very long time, and I've seen plenty of Michelle Bachmannized photos... so it'll give me nightmares for years, thanks a lot. Whalen would make the ugliest Lucifer ever. Tilda Swinton as the King of Lies? Sure, she's androgynous enough, but I'm really not scared of her. Glenn Close scares me a whole lot more (oddly enough), and she'd be a better actress for this part. The inclusion of Bill Murray is an inspired choice - it would be so cool to see what great magic he could create with that kind of meaty role. But I have yet to see Eddie Redmayne really come into his own as a standout performer - he seems to fit more comfortably as a supporting actor than a lead one. But come ON, why would you ever NOT put Christopher Walken, Cillian Murphy and Peter Sarsgaard on this list? All three actors are always at the top of their game when they play smooth talking villains with ice in their veins. Seriously, these guys have so much gravitas, they wouldn't have to say a word. All they'd have to do to destroy anyone as the Prince Of Darkness is stare directly at them and they'd burst into flames. And I'd also nominate Baby Goose, because he'd be so seductively disarming, one would never ever suspect him of being Satan until he'd charmed the soul out of them and it was too late. Gosling would rule as the Devil, and you know it. Watch "Drive": he's our generation's Marlon Brando.

Posted by: Brian Kehinde at January 12, 2012 2:31 AM

Crispin Glover?

Posted by: dsbs at January 12, 2012 7:07 AM

Rachel MacAdams ..... oh yeah ... mmmm ...... uhn uhn uhn ..... POP!!!!

There we go, I think she just made a sinner out of me, so I vote for Rachel as the Devil .....

Posted by: handy_man at January 12, 2012 10:06 PM

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The First 5 People I'd Consider If I Were Casting Satan in a Film in Which the Devil Lives Among Us

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