The Downfall Of Val Kilmer - A Study In Posters | Yet Another In A Long Series Of Diversions In An Attempt To Avoid Responsibility

The Downfall Of Val Kilmer - A Study In Posters

By TK | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (72)

Val Kilmer is an a mystery wrapped in an enigma surrounded by confoundment, currently buried in a heap of cinematic tragedy.

Admit it. If you think of your all time favorite movies — I don’t mean the most respectable movies, necessarily, but the most fun movies on your list, I’m willing to bet all of the money in my wallet (four dollars) that he’s in at last one of them. Not to say that he hasn’t made some respectable movies, too — The Doors, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang — but mostly, Val Kilmer has just been fun. Nowadays… yeesh.

Now, I’m also something of a nut for things like movie trailers and posters, so I figured (inspired by commenter klingonfree) we’d do a little study on Kilmer’s steady decline using posters as our guide.

We begin, as with all things, at the beginning:

1984’s Top Secret!, one of the most fun movies ever made.

1985’s Real Genius. One of my favorite movies. A study in fun, if you’ll excuse the wretched pun. Just look at him!

1986’s Top Gun. Perhaps Kilmer isn’t featured on the poster, but Iceman is unquestionably one of the highlights of this ~~softcore gay porn~~ film, and another of my favorites.

Willow, Kilmer’s 1988 foray into fantasy. Goofy as hell, but a great goddamn movie. There he is, all long-haired and dashing (and a little crazy).

Then, he took a shot at respectability:

1991’2 The Doors. Less fun. More crazy. But serious-crazy, which is not my preferred flavor of Kilmer. Flamey and serious and just begging for respectability.

A contentious choice for this list, as Kilmer is never fully seen and only in the film for roughly 60 seconds. I don’t give a crap. It’s 60 outstanding seconds. I’ve always liked you Clarence…

Kilmer’s magnum opus, the superlative Tombstone, featuring one of his most quotable roles. A film that is defined by balls, testosterone, and, yes, fucking fun. Look at him. He strides purposefully with Kurt Russell and Sam Fucking Elliott! And… um… Bill Paxton.

Oy. Batman Forever. Today, Kilmer looks at The Dark Knight and thinks, “oh, what the fuck, man. I got stuck with fucking Schumacher?” Was this the beginning of the end? Perhaps it’s good that he’s wearing a mask.

“No! Because there I am, featured right between Pacino and Deniro, in arguably the greatest heist film ever!”

Fuck you. I love 1996’s The Ghost And The Darkness, though it’s really Michael Douglas that owns this movie (and the poster, to be honest). Still… it gave me hope.

However, we’re now in the stretch where there’s more bad, like these:

Yikes. But still! Your name up there with Brando? Who says no to that? Plus, that’s good postering right there.

I can defend neither this film nor this poster.

Now we enter the land of the decent, but lesser-knowns:

Decent movie, great poster.

Excellent film that no one saw (which one could say of many Mamet films). Shitty poster, though.

Kilmer gets reunited with Oliver Stone… which was a poor decision. Plus, he has to wear that beard and goofy gold hat. Not good.

BUT WAIT! We arrive at one of the best roles in his career, the beginning of a resurgence, right?

A brilliant goddamn movie and, with its noirish tones and washed colors, an all-around excellent poster. Good things are coming, friends. The Kilmster (h/t: Bedhead) is BACK, bitches!

Wait, what? This actually happened?

Oh, God. No, Val. No.

Make it stop. MAKE IT STOP.

Kilmer! Assante! Roberts! FUCK!

Don’t see him? He was the voice of the car. In the “Knight Rider” reboot. Mercy. I’m begging you, Val. MERCY!

Rest in peace, old friend. This will be the final nail.

Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← The Pajiba Power Rankings ("Terriers" Cancelled Edition) | The Ten Best TV Episodes of the Week | Billy Joel Just Came Through My Internets and Molested My Soul →

Comments

Oh my god there was a Ten Commandments Musical?

How have I lived without this in my life for so long?

I feel jaded and lied to by everyone I know because they didn't immediately bring this into my life.

Posted by: The Gay at December 6, 2010 2:39 PM

I'm totally honored. I...I...I need to read this post now......

Posted by: klingonfree at December 6, 2010 2:40 PM

Hmm... list needs more Mindhunters.

Posted by: penelope at December 6, 2010 2:41 PM

I still haven't seen Heat. But I keep meaning to watch Spartan.

And there's that film where he's blind with...Mira Sorvino? And then he's not blind and scared by shadows.

Willow is awesome.

Posted by: Carrie at December 6, 2010 2:42 PM

No mention of The Saint? My friends and I in high school thought seriously about ways to seem like we were in threat of hypothermia in order to get hot chicks to sleep with us. Then we realized the main issue was that we weren't Val Kilmer so it probably wouldn't work.

Posted by: benjiep at December 6, 2010 2:42 PM

I love Val, good and bad. I am a believer in Advancement Theory and really believe that Val has tested the insanity of Hollywood and has come out being labeled an Eclectic; a seriously hard earned, genuine title when you factor in the Hollywood fame whore wannabes by the hundreds. I LOVE Real Genius, Top Secret and REALLY, in the depths of my guilty pleasures, love him as Jim Morrison.

An AWESOME attempt in avoiding responsibility. Val ROCKS :)

Posted by: Melissa C. at December 6, 2010 2:46 PM

Oh Val, you were so, so pretty. Le sigh.

Maybe there's still a shot at a comeback with Twixt Now and Sunrise?

Posted by: Cindy at December 6, 2010 2:46 PM

The Steam Experiement.

I don't even need to make a joke about that.

Posted by: superasente at December 6, 2010 2:48 PM

He saved cold fusion!

Posted by: Mac at December 6, 2010 2:51 PM

What about The Saint? Mrs. Kballs loved that one.

I think we can all agree that Mr. Kilmer belongs in the pantheon of cinematic sidekicks, in spite of his more recent work. Real Genius (despite top billing, he was cast as the sidekick), Top Gun, Tombstone, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. That's a murderer's row of peerless sidekickery.

I think we should consider sharing Johsua Jackson's (RIP) nickname with Val due to his amazing career nosedive because he is now dead to all of us, no?

Posted by: Kballs at December 6, 2010 2:51 PM

God dammit, I still love you, Val. Though, I think it helps that I haven't seen any of the movies after the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang poster. It's time to throw away your Wesley Snipes Script Picker 3000. IT WAS A GAG GIFT!

Posted by: jM at December 6, 2010 2:52 PM

And now for something really strange.

Posted by: Cindy at December 6, 2010 2:53 PM

I still consider myself a Val Kilmer fan because of the greatness of a few of these movies and his performances therein. He gets a pass for life from me by virtue of Real Genius, Willow, The Doors, Tombstone, Spartan, and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.

That said, The Ghost And The Darkness is an outright horrible movie. My friends and I laughed hysterically at that lion-mauling dream sequence. That Red Planet poster was an interesting design choice in the sense that it's completely misleading with the implication that there are aliens in the movie. The tagline is not very true to the spirit of the movie either. Someone who sees that poster might also wonder how it is that Kilmer's character can breathe on the surface of Mars (which does receive an explanation in the movie). Of course, if they're implying a horror movie with aliens, they might as well imply that "Red Planet" could refer to an Earth covered in blood just as easily as it does to Mars.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at December 6, 2010 2:54 PM

Le sigh indeed.

The thing about the Kilmer is that he was so fucking beautiful that it was tempting to think he was untalented or a flash in le pan.

But he kept coming out with SURPRISE movies in which he rose to and exceeded expectations...all while looking like a million bucks in sterling silver nickles (is that how you spell nickles? It looks wonky...).

By Salton Sea (SO much to be said for this movie...Pooh Bear - Vince D'Onofrio...deserving of his own post*cough*suggestion*cough)...he was starting to look like he had Embraced The Donut. Just a bit. Maybe just a heavy donut hole habit....

By Kiss Kiss Bang Bang he was already into elastic-waist pants, but still! So funny! So wry! So many maple bars!

In the end I believe he succumbed to the lure of KrisPy Kreme, Double-Doubles and Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. AND WHO CAN BLAME HIM?

I do wonder about the lack of vanity, though. is it all a big existential Fuck You to the shallow masses in his industry? If so, having a moral code sure is hell on the looks, eh Val?

Still...We'll always have The Saint, won't we, Val?

Posted by: klingonfree at December 6, 2010 2:59 PM

Nonsense, he has not yet begun to defile himself.

Didn't he already play Moses in an animated film? Prince of Egypt?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at December 6, 2010 2:59 PM

This list of incredibly great movies has inspired me.

Fuck the Baldwins.
Let's start the Restore Val Kilmer Foundation.

We can buy him a treadmill. Hire a coach to explain why his previous roles were amazing and his latter roles...well kinda rolled in their own filth. Get him an asain commercial where he does a tapdancing number to shill something obscure like octopus flavored soda. Oh it's gonna happen. Kilmer's coming back. Someone find me a three piece suit. With A decent vest damn you! And a bowler, no wait tophat, no wait Kilmer might just have the balls to handle a cabbie hat suit combo. Get motivated people. If we don't do this who will?

Posted by: Blank at December 6, 2010 3:06 PM

I think Kilmer's decided to not only walk the path of former co-star Brando, but also to take stimulus money to widen and pave it into a superhighway.

Posted by: ed newman at December 6, 2010 3:09 PM

May I humbly submit "Wonderland" as a terrific lesser known.

Posted by: mr friendly at December 6, 2010 3:10 PM

P.S. I weep for the memory of that hottest of hot sluts -- Madmartigan.

Posted by: klingonfree at December 6, 2010 3:11 PM

I have to admit, the thought of making three-way sexing with Kilmer and D'Onofrio makes my tingly bits quite happy.

Posted by: Jerry at December 6, 2010 3:12 PM

By Kiss Kiss Bang Bang he was already into elastic-waist pants, but still! So funny! So wry! So many maple bars!

I almost died reading that line.

Posted by: Perfect Tommy at December 6, 2010 3:12 PM

Salton Sea is above decent, sir. Also, the poster for that isn't showing.

Oh and thanks for the True Romance spot. I always loved his tiny unseen performance in that too.

Posted by: Paultera at December 6, 2010 3:12 PM

Excellent use of a Real Genius quote in the title, TK.

Are we 100% sure that's not Jeff Bridges on that "Columbus Day" poster? Because it sure as hell looks like him. Oh, Hot Kilmer of yesteryear, where have you gone?!?

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at December 6, 2010 3:15 PM

Mr. Friendly is right. Val is quite good in Wonderland

Posted by: elizabeth at December 6, 2010 3:21 PM

The problem with the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang poster is that they clearly 'shopped dozens of pounds off him. He was already well into the "donut downfall" at that point, but he was still FUCKING AMAZING in that movie. He can be a lard-ass and still make good movies. He just needs to choose his scripts better. But that's not how things usually go, is it?

In the end I believe he succumbed to the lure of KrisPy Kreme, Double-Doubles and Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. AND WHO CAN BLAME HIM?

Not me, surely. Who among us can resist such things?

Posted by: MM at December 6, 2010 3:23 PM

Thoughts:

1- Photoshopped Angelina Jolie looks exactly like Mila Kunis, which makes me think that Hollywood execs should just ask Mila to pose as Angie for poster pics. Angie is too busy telling the world she has no female friends, anyway.

2- 10 COMMANDMENTS: THE MUSICAL???!?!!!!!!!!!! I want to go to there.

Posted by: THE Sofía at December 6, 2010 3:25 PM

If you really want to see Unhinged Kilmer, watch Into The West, a TNT miniseries from a few years back where Kilmer plays some frontier military colonel captured and driven crazy by Indians.

Posted by: eddie walker at December 6, 2010 3:26 PM

MelBivDevoe brings up a salient point re the Bridges-Kilmer link. Bridges, like The Kilmer, was heartbreakingly beautiful AND a solid actor. Bridges, too, made douchey choices (Against All Odds...but I'm torn because if you watch AAOs w sound off it's practically Bridges Porn. So ahamed.)

Bridges, however, never swandived (swandove?) into a vat of Twinkie cream filling.

It's all about choices. And Hostess snack cakes.

Posted by: klingonfree at December 6, 2010 3:33 PM

Kilmer plays some frontier military colonel captured and driven crazy by Indians.

Oh shit! We've all been there, amiright?!

*looks around* Right?

*crickets*

. . .

Oh suuure. I'm the ONLY one. Riiight. Whatever, man.

Posted by: Kballs at December 6, 2010 3:40 PM

Actually, Kballs, I sadly took the other path at the fork in the road, away from crazy colonel, and went the Hostess snack cake route.

Posted by: Rykker at December 6, 2010 3:44 PM

He was the best thing in The Island of Dr. Moreau. That counts for something, doesn't it?

And I liked The Ghost and the Darkness, too.

Posted by: Todd at December 6, 2010 3:58 PM

The first time I saw True Romance many years ago I caught it on cable and had little idea what it was. Kilmer gets third billing in the opening titles, and with the rest of that cast I was very excited about what I was about to see. I watch the whole movie and enjoy it, but then at the end I asked myself: "Wait - where was Val Kilmer?" I check the end credits, which again list him in the third spot as "Mentor." "Mentor? Who the hell was... Oohhhhhh."

eddie walker >> Wasn't that character description his role in the miniseries Comanche Moon? I never saw the show; I only read the book and knew what character he was playing.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at December 6, 2010 4:02 PM

I want to see the musical number for the "Thou shall not covet thy neighbor's ox."

Posted by: Mrcreosote at December 6, 2010 4:06 PM

Holy CRAP, I NEED to see that musical NOW!! Someone tell me where one middle-european grown-up can get it without destroying her future, pleeeease!

Oh thank Pesci, it's on youtube! All-clear, everyone.

Posted by: Rooks at December 6, 2010 4:27 PM

I adore Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang... just for that, I can forgive all that has happened since.

Random fact of the day: Adam Lambert was in the Ten Commandments with Kilmer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IY9olWGwF7c

Posted by: Twinkle at December 6, 2010 4:31 PM

I like The Island of Dr. Moreau, though that's only because I'll tend to enjoy anything where Fairuza Balk gets to chew the scenery (Return to Oz, included).

A certain gay pop star was also in The Ten Commandments: The Musical. I told you all that he had a future in theater before getting tangled up in that Idol bullshit. Lose some weight and trot the boards again, Adam, please? Was it that bad doing the Wicked tour as the male lead that you gave it up for famewhoring and crap dance music? Really?

But I digress. The score (what I've heard of it before) is actually pretty good. It's legit vocals over modern orchestrations with a few Middle Eastern flourishes that work well enough. It essentially wants to be the biblical Aida (the musical, not the opera) without any of the style, grace, or production values.

Posted by: Robert at December 6, 2010 4:36 PM

Dear Twinkie,

Please stop beating me to my points by writing two sentences that don't require editing and not using html formatting. I look foolish when the gap between the posts is 5 minutes even though I started writing a few minutes before you posted.

Not seriously at all,

Posted by: Robert at December 6, 2010 4:38 PM

test

Posted by: Jay at December 6, 2010 4:40 PM

Sorry, Robert... I may or may not be a big Lambert fan with youtubes at the ready... which means I also may or may not be glossing over the famewhoring and bad dance music comments :(

Anyways, back to your regularly scheduled Kilmer programming.

Posted by: Twinkle at December 6, 2010 4:43 PM

What was the really disturbing movie where he plays the porno star? He was excellent in that. I thought he should have won many awards...

Posted by: amanda at December 6, 2010 5:06 PM

P.S. I weep for the memory of that hottest of hot sluts -- Madmartigan.

Truer words...

Yum, Madmartigan is one of the hottest fantasy characters eva!

Posted by: Mebe at December 6, 2010 6:14 PM

I just saw Top Secret for the first time (and Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang, come to think of it, I'm clearly pretty late to this party). My god that man was hot! That led me to google his image for my SO who did not believe that he had slide so far from hotness. Sad.

Oh, and you forgot Thunderheart, which I adore.

Posted by: Alarmjaguar at December 6, 2010 6:19 PM

Where's Thunderheart? One of my faves. He has more than a handful of great performances. Not every actor can say that.

Val Kilmer has always marched to a different drummer, which makes him more than just a pretty face. He seems to have made a happy life for himself out west, hardly in need of rescue.

He's an actor, and all actors appear in turkeys. Sadly, it seems like the real subtext of this post is that he is getting older and is no longer skinny.

Posted by: xoxoxoe at December 6, 2010 6:39 PM

Wow. I thought I was the only one that loved Ghost and the Darkness. Long live TK!

Posted by: Lemon Poundcake at December 6, 2010 7:07 PM

Stateside, anyone? Anyone?

Nevermind.

Posted by: BierceAmbrose at December 6, 2010 8:58 PM

Look at the size of that head!

Posted by: Pork Bowl at December 6, 2010 11:31 PM

Oh, Madmartigan...I dwell in darkness without you.

Posted by: 2HB at December 6, 2010 11:46 PM

How many of you had to look really hard, I mean a few times, to recognize Kilmer as Nicolas Cage's partner in the 'Bad Lieutenant 2' movie?

It's taken a necessary amount of time - decades, in fact- for this magnificent actor to accumulate an incredibly eclectic and exciting film resume' to define just what a versatile and totally committed artist he is, one who has transcended categorization, portraying real-life, iconic personalities and re-defining them through his own unique perspective; tackled roles that even he was probably well aware could or never would be accepted by mainstream audiences or critics alike; applying the same intensity and total investment into whatever character he's playing in any given film, even the shittiest, for no greater reason than to just do it.

I'm sorry- I never thought I was such a big Val Kilmer fan until I went through that poster-laden filmography above - and combining these performances with the ones that weren't shown...

Val Kilmer, like Kevin Bacon and a precious few who haven't yet completed their resume's, are the Tom Cruise/Brad Pitt/Leo DiCaprio genius-actor annihilators that will be remembered for their challenging, fascinating bodies of work that are more impressive than their more immediately sensational, yet temporary, peers', which time will reveal when overall filmographies are compared when these actors are in their twilight years.

Posted by: Superfluous at December 7, 2010 12:48 AM

I really like Spartan. I first caught it on cable and thought it was going to just be some cheesy action flick, then really enjoyed it. I had to watch it a couple of more times just to convince myself that I wasn't crazy and it was better than it looked. Mamet explains it all.

I really had high hopes for Kilmer as Batman. He did interview before they chose keaton about how he wanted to be Batman, and really had a grasp for how dark a character it was. Damn did they ever fuck up that movie. I'd love to hear his thoughts about the production of that movie and the subsequent films. Especially because he did catch some crazy from Brando so whatever the answer it should be entertaining.

DarthCorleone: It said mentor? I thought it said Elvis?

Posted by: LwoodPDowd at December 7, 2010 2:11 AM

The Saint!

Also, a couple of years ago I know (KNOW!) he was in a Uwe Boll movie named something along the lines of The Dead Man or The Body or something. My friend picked it up from the Red Box and he's like oh, it's got Val Kilmer. Well it was entirely in Polish and the gag... Val Kilmer was the body. His role was playing a dead person. And it was a HORRIBLE movie. Now a cursory search of IMDb does not show this on either Kilmer or Boll's pages but I know it happened, dammit. That was an hour and a half of my life I can't undo.

Posted by: Even Stevens at December 7, 2010 2:28 AM

"Spartan" kicks ass. Kilmer basically plays a Jack Bauer type, just more ruthless and conflicted. It is a damn good Mamet movie, better than Red Belt, and twisty as all hell. Lots of great actors tearing up that signature Mamet dialogue. If you take a shot anytime someone asks "Where is the girl?" you will be dead by the 30 minute mark.

Every cast member of "True Romance" gets a lifetime cool pass. I'm pretty sure it is in their contract somewhere, and thats just the way it is.

Posted by: TylerDFC at December 7, 2010 8:43 AM

You left out 'the Saint' which is fairly glaring.

Posted by: Paul Orr at December 7, 2010 8:45 AM

...i'm your huckleberry.

Posted by: kikz at December 7, 2010 9:03 AM

No matter how bloated Val gets I'll always have Tombstone and Heat. I totally forgot who starred in The Ghost and the Darkness. I'm glad I'm not the only one who enjoyed that movie.

Did anyone see that terrible western TV miniseries Comanche Moon in 2008? Didn't think so. I still remember thinking about Val "Man, he sure got fat and forgot how to act." Then I turned the channel because it was terrible.

Posted by: Dingle Berry at December 7, 2010 9:48 AM

"Take your knife out, now take out his eye ... you bet your life!"

Spartan - Fuck Yea!!

Posted by: Shane at December 7, 2010 12:59 PM

No mention of MacGruber?!?! Probably better that way.

Posted by: Hairyman at December 7, 2010 2:12 PM

I don't care. He's still a daisy in my book.

Posted by: PDamian at December 7, 2010 2:24 PM

Your failure to mention Thunderheart is unforgivable. Such a beautifully strange movie with great performances...

At least you have his role as Elvis up there. True Romance has long been one of my favorite films.

Tombstone, Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang- hell, he had a pretty good run. Give the man a break, he's just hungry and needs a nap. At least he's still living. Its better to just fade away than to burn out like the James Deans and Heath Ledgers of the world. Even big fat Brando had some gas left in the tank.

Posted by: EJ at December 7, 2010 3:03 PM

my old room mates used to sing songs from the ten commandments musical to torture me. it hurt my art place

Posted by: supergwarr at December 7, 2010 5:57 PM

He'll always be my huckleberry.

Posted by: figgy at December 7, 2010 9:06 PM

Absolutely true, he's in one of my favorite movies. BTW, why is The Saint not on this list. The guy solved the world's energy crisis!

Posted by: Setiawan at December 8, 2010 12:24 AM

I loved The Saint. I mean, loved, loved, loved. Elizabeth Shue was terrible, but Val was great!

Posted by: Leah at December 8, 2010 1:06 AM

Once I was hungover and wandering in Blockbuster with a friend on a Sunday afternoon when we saw, sitting in the shelves, Ten Commandments the Musical. We looked at each other, and then we knew.

This was our destiny.

And destiny was apparently an afternoon of terrible, overproduced glory.

I think we made it three quarters of the way through. It was truly a special experience, complete with bad singing, over-acting, giant and unwieldy set changes, and completely inaccurate costumes including some princess with ridiculous lace-up platform sandals.

Best hangover theater ever, saith the Lord.

If I remember correctly it's ridiculously long (thus our reason for not making it all the way through) so you can leave it on while you pass out on the couch from laughter and that pesky headache.

Posted by: Kalexal at December 8, 2010 5:50 AM

You gotta love....

VAL KILMER IS MOSES.

Who wouldn't want that on their movie musical poster?

Posted by: Gigantor at December 8, 2010 8:35 AM

Not one mention of 'Felon'??
What's wrong with you people?
It was a supporting role, but it's the coolest Val's looked since Salton Sea.

Posted by: Thatguyphil at December 8, 2010 1:05 PM

Seeing the Jack Bauer post made me think that an intervention by Keifer Sutherland may be the way to go. That guy was totally on the edge and somehow pulled it back together.

Posted by: lizella at December 8, 2010 2:33 PM

What? No "Kill Me Again"? But you can almost tell he's in the poster!

Posted by: KateNonymous at December 8, 2010 3:23 PM

The Salton Sea. What a movie. One of my faves.

Posted by: Gavin S. at December 9, 2010 8:50 PM

Uh, is Val starting to morph into Mickey Rourke? That last poster is worrying me...

Posted by: Fran at December 12, 2010 1:36 AM

I actually screamed with fear when I saw that last poster. Damnit Val, my aunt was right. There was hope in the beginning...now all is lost.

Posted by: KC at December 12, 2010 2:19 PM

THUNDERHEART, THUNDERHEART, THUNDERHEART. Val Kilmer made Thunderheart, so even if he keeps churning out crappy movies until the end of the world, it doesn't really matter. He made Thunderheart and that in itself is enough.

Posted by: Olrik Mortimer at February 13, 2011 3:41 PM

Man, you guys are so fucking funny. 'Tis a long time since December but I felt the need to add my two pennies to this conversation:

Val Kilmer will always be (despite my husband's constant taunting) my one true love.
It's true, and it's time that everyone must face facts. Mine.

But in all seriousness, he will be one of those celebrities I mourn the death of although. Everybody has one, and mine is Val. My discovery of him was at a time when I was going through my average-girl puberty and suddenly there he was being so insatiably hot in 'Ghost and the Darkness'....
...fine specimen of a man...*wipes sweat off brow*...

Wow. Sorry about that. I don't normally get that carried away...

Posted by: Brianna at March 14, 2011 4:11 AM

Pajiba

Pajiba: Reviews, Commentary, Angst

The Downfall Of Val Kilmer - A Study In Posters

Comments