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The Five Best Super Bowl Commercials

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (48)



jay-leno-oprah-david-l.jpg

Overall, it was a fairly weak night for Super Bowl commercials — I have no idea why some of these corporations would spend $3 million per 30-second spot to, say, humiliate Charles Barkley, KISS, or the 1986 Chicago Bears. Most of the commercials that weren’t downright lame were excruciatingly embarrassing. And what was up with all the Manly Man commercials? Maybe I could understand the sexist bullshit for a normal Sunday lineup of football, but this was the biggest television event of the year. And hey! Guess what! Women watch the Super Bowl. And now you’ve alienated them. Congratulations, dumbasses.

Doritos, however, did have a pretty good night — they had three or four ads, and they were all better than average. Meanwhile, Budweiser — which must have spent $30 million last night, easily — completely struck out, save for the kind of OK human bridge spot (and that Clydesdale commercial? I think it’s time to retire that series). The GoDaddy commercials were, as usual, kind of offensive and completely pointless in terms of selling their product (though, let’s admit that, thanks to their yearly SB ads, GoDaddy is the only game in town — I don’t even know where else you can buy domain names). E*Trade and their goddamn talking babies were fairly ineffective, and the big controversial spot of the night — the Focus on Family one with Tim Tebow — didn’t even mention the word abortion. So much for controversy. The Simpsons Coke commercial was weak; pulling the Griswolds back onto the small screen was a failure for Home Away; the Monster Beaver was sad; and I didn’t even understand the Denny’s Grand Slam commercials — why spend $10 or $12 million to advertise that you’re giving away some bad diner eggs — nobody is going to leave that experience anything but still hungry and they’ll smell like burnt caterpillars, which is the aroma of Dennys.

I did love the number one commercial, though, which was really just a CBS promo. That was good stuff, and the number five spot wasn’t particularly funny or anything, but it was, I thought, the most effective spot of the night, in that it captured our attention and demonstrated the product. That 60-second spot should do a lot of damage to Bing’s ability to gain a foothold in the search market.


5. The Google Commercial

4. Betty White Snickers Commercial

3. Bridgestone Bachelor Party Commercial

2. Doritos: Underdog

1. Dave Letterman, Oprah Winfrey, & Jay Leno Promo










Box Office Results 02/08/10 | The Thing Remake News













Comments

i can't think of a single commercial that was decent this year.
hey, can we do something about the incredibly annoying werewolf pop-up. every single time i switch screens....

Posted by: courtney at February 8, 2010 9:15 AM

Wrong Doritos commercial...the one with the crazy guy sticking a dorito in the other dudes neck was definitely their best one. I also liked the VW commercial, just for the Stevie Wonder/Tracy Jordan ending. Also the obligatory little kid punching grandpa in the nuts.

Posted by: Woody at February 8, 2010 9:21 AM

Betty White -- "That's not what your girlfriend said."

End of story.

Posted by: sansho1 at February 8, 2010 9:27 AM

My fav is still the Doritos ad with the kid who slaps his mom's boyfriend. "Keep your hands off my mama, and keep your hands off my doritos." Amazing.

Posted by: KatSings at February 8, 2010 9:47 AM

Betty White would have handed that punk his own ass.

I did like the Doritos one, but wouldn't the dog have taken the collar off earlier if he was able to?

Posted by: admin at February 8, 2010 9:50 AM

Oh yes, making fun of a dog for wearing one of those awful anti-bark collars is hillarious, especially with a revenge fantasy thrown in.

Time to find a new brand of cheese-flavored chips.

Posted by: Robert at February 8, 2010 9:55 AM

Betty White + Abe Vigoda= FTW

Posted by: dammitjanet at February 8, 2010 9:57 AM

I didn't know Abe Vigoda was still alive. I thought he was dead while filming Barney Miller.

Posted by: BWeaves at February 8, 2010 10:05 AM

Wow. The Super Bowl game thread AND the anti-Super Bowl weekend diversion thread are both GONE.

You take losing HARD, do you, DR? Guess I better never piss you off, seeing's you have the power to just make things disappear. No one's ever found Pookie's body either.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: , at February 8, 2010 10:11 AM

Ooops, my bad. They just got moved all the way to the bottom. Heh, sorry, hope I didn't piss y

Posted by: , at February 8, 2010 10:13 AM

And what was up with all the Manly Man commercials? Maybe I could understand the sexist bullshit for a normal Sunday lineup of football, but this was the biggest television event of the year. And hey! Guess what! Women watch the Super Bowl. And no you’ve alienated them. Congratulations, dumbasses.

THANK YOU for this. I actually asked pseudo-Mr. vB and our friend Craig if I was being old and bitter and overly sensitive or if they were in fact incredibly sexist (a couple of them, anyway. I tend to wander away @ commercials) (also, they did agree with me). I'm glad I'm not the only one.

Oh, and I was eating a delicious homemade cream puff when I read this:
and they’ll smell like burnt caterpillars, which is the aroma of Dennys.
I now have cream in my hair and powdered sugar everywhere, so thanks for that too.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverpuppet at February 8, 2010 10:20 AM

I must have missed that Betty White Snickers spot, that's a good one.

The VW commercial should be on this list - Come on, Who didn't play Slug Bug as a kid?

Posted by: Tereasa at February 8, 2010 10:21 AM

Great synopsis, Dustin. Overall a REALLY weak roster of ads--other than the Doritos barking dog and kid slap down, Betty White the linebacker, and the Bridgestone bachelor-party-with-killer-whale spots, the rest seemed as if they were written by giggling eighth graders possessed of a deep fear of/disdain for women. Overall, better suited for Raiders vs. Bills.

Pitchers and catchers in a few weeks!

Posted by: tomc at February 8, 2010 10:22 AM

Pitchers and catchers in a few weeks!

Posted by: tomc at February 8, 2010 10:22 AM
---
Now yer talkin'.

Posted by: , at February 8, 2010 10:26 AM

Pitchers and catchers in a few weeks!

The gay Superbowl?

Posted by: admin at February 8, 2010 10:29 AM

Hah, the Snickers ad with Betty was awesome.

Otherwise... meh.

Posted by: Gabs at February 8, 2010 10:31 AM

My favorite was definitely the Google one - it teared me up. And the best Doritos commercial was the "Dave LOVES Doritos. Hide them-!" and he gets a Dorito stuck in his neck hahahahaha

Game was pretty awesome too!

Posted by: dene at February 8, 2010 10:32 AM

The Betty White commercial was the only one that made me laugh.

Posted by: John W at February 8, 2010 10:49 AM

Last night's commercials were lousy with men running around in their underwear.

MEMO
From: Corporate America
To: Women Everywhere
YOU'RE WELCOME!

Posted by: Kballs at February 8, 2010 11:02 AM

Those were all completely lame...except for the Google one.Not sorry at all that I missed the Superbowl.

Posted by: brite at February 8, 2010 11:02 AM

Being from Canada, I'm just amazed that I can actually watch hulu. Holy crap!

Posted by: Janey at February 8, 2010 11:19 AM

I agree with all of these except The Doritos commercial. Just trying too hard, I think. How about the Kia Sorento commercial with the toys' fantasies come to life? Another niggling question: Do you think Leno and Letterman were filmed separately then through the magic of TV appeared together? Hmm. And yes, yes, yes, the misogyny is alive and well in 90% of all of The Bowl's adverts. I thought most marketing firms were smarter than this. But, hey..what do I know? I'm only a woman.

Posted by: KLS at February 8, 2010 11:26 AM

Ha, KLS! I forgot about the sock monkey getting his tattoo stitched on, which made me choke on my rum & coke. In the good way.

But, hey..what do I know? I'm only a woman.

Don't worry, just go shopping! That always makes everything better. Don't forget to nag a man until he goes with you and carries all your stuff, though!

Posted by: Anna von Beaverpuppet at February 8, 2010 11:41 AM

I'm pretty sure that all of those Doritos spots were made by fans for a contest that Doritos held. That made them more tolerable to me. I even ate some Doritos in the fourth quarter.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at February 8, 2010 11:52 AM

Oh shit! The Super Bowl was yesterday? I thought is was next week, fuck!

Posted by: Orrin Hatch at February 8, 2010 11:53 AM

Screw the Denny's ads. I thought the Clydesdales were, as usual, cute but not extraordinary. As Doritos ads go, my favorite was in the gym with the Dorito samurai. Amusing. What about that Cars.com ad? That one was really effective, imo. Overall, a weak year.

Posted by: ChristianH at February 8, 2010 12:15 PM

Also, how was that ManCrunch ad too indecent to show, but those GoDaddy ads and that f***ing Megan Fox ad (which was ridiculously stupid) are totally okay for families?

Posted by: ChristianH at February 8, 2010 12:18 PM

@AvB: Pandagon has a hard-hitting look at the "manly man" trend you and Dustin noticed (me, I wasn't watching the game). You're definitely not alone, as you can see by the comments.

http://pandagon.net/index.php/site/comments/thoughts_on_the_misogyny_bowl_in_advertising_versus_a_really_uplifiting_gam/

Posted by: Ranylt at February 8, 2010 12:19 PM

I watched ABC all night. "Modern Family" FTW.

Posted by: Slash at February 8, 2010 12:23 PM

I thought the Google one was the best. It was cool how the person in the commercial typing spelled a word wrong and clicked on the "Did you Mean..." link. Very effective ad in my opinion.

Posted by: Dave at February 8, 2010 12:25 PM

Also, I haven't seen any of the misogynist ads people are talking about, but you should know that a majority of the people who dream up the awesome TV spots you watch are men. And most are men aged about 25-50 or so. Men write most of the ads, they approve most of the ads, most of the art directors are men. Not sure about the client side. There are tons of women who are in a position to approve campaigns on the client side. Guess there aren't that many in the "manly" product companies.

Posted by: Slash at February 8, 2010 12:27 PM

Yeah, all three of the guys with whom I was watching the Super Bowl commented on the anti-woman themed commercials.

I loved the Betty White/Abe Vigoda ad. And the one with the toys--simply for the sock monkey tattoo.

Posted by: tamatha at February 8, 2010 12:44 PM


*Charles Barkley ad plays*

Me: wow, he's fat
MrFig: who is that?
Me: That one famous guy
MrFig: what's his name?! I know him from somewhere
me: HE'S SO FAT
MrFig: who is that??
Me: I don't know his name! I just know he's fat!
MrFig: probably from eating so much Taco Bell
Me: man, what a fatty.

*end scene*

Posted by: figgy at February 8, 2010 12:56 PM

Nice. Thanks, Ranylt. That Flo TV ad, the one they're picking apart in the article, is exactly the one I was talking about. Interestingly, a couple of the comments point out that they're fairly offensive to men as well, which is pretty true.

I should clarify that, to be fair, I didn't watch very many of the commercials. The only ones I really saw were the Flo TV and the Dodge, which were the ones I thought sexist, the toys one, the Clydesdale and the bull (which I thought was kind of adorable, but let's face it, I'm easily manipulated. Probably because I'm a woman), and a couple of the Doritos ones. Oh, and the Little Kiss Dr. Pepper one, followed immediately by the Punxatawney That Football Player Whose Name I Don't Know With The Hair. I think I saw the one with the robot a couple of times, but I wasn't paying attention at all, so I couldn't tell you what it was for.

I definitely remember caring about the ads more when I was younger.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverpuppet at February 8, 2010 12:59 PM

I thought the Kia commercial with the Sock Monkey was amazing.

Posted by: Colin at February 8, 2010 1:11 PM

My hubby and I seem to be the only ones who HATED the doritos dog commercial. Maybe I am overanalyzing, but why would you put an anti-bark collar on a dog and then command it to speak; it is cruel. The dog should have mauled the asshole. One other note--when did the Air Force decide to use Mountain Dew commercials for recruiting?

Posted by: maceo at February 8, 2010 1:57 PM

The 7' dildo bowling with the sock monkey was cool. The Bud Clydesdale/Calf ad should have ended with some fatass wood-gluing a broken chair while washing down a burger with an ice cold Budweiser.

Posted by: laredo at February 8, 2010 2:09 PM

i really liked the bud voice box commercial it was hilarious...also the slug bug one was good and the NFL clips with "wake up" as the background music were definitely better than 99% of the commercials

Posted by: anna at February 8, 2010 2:34 PM

The game was actually better than the ads this year.

Posted by: Julia at February 8, 2010 3:23 PM

Actually, I thought that the Bud/Clydesdale ad had sort of a "Brokeback Mountain" vibe going.

Posted by: The Wanderer at February 8, 2010 3:36 PM

I just returned from a study abroad program in Italy where I fell in love with a local. I had to put down my fork and cry when the google commercial came on. Luckily, he'll be here in less than a month...

Posted by: eliza at February 8, 2010 3:39 PM

MediaCurves.com conducted a national study among thousands of Super Bowl viewers taking online surveys during the game. Final results found that commercial of Super Bowl XLIV. All Super Bowl ads from 2010 can be seen along with their individual ratings and scores at: www.mediacurves.com
Thanks,
Ben


Posted by: Ben at February 8, 2010 3:42 PM

The Clydesdale / bull ad used the score from Forrest Gump to tug at your heartstrings, if you didn't notice. Blech.

That Letterman-Leno ad bothers me too. It basically amounts to free positive press for Leno, and I don't think he deserves it. He and Dave are just sitting on the couch, everything that has transpired must have been in good fun, etc. Does CBS really think that's promoting their network or Letterman's show?

Posted by: DarthCorleone at February 8, 2010 4:17 PM

I'd trade the Doritos commercial in spot #2 for the CareerBuilder "Casual Dress" commercial. Pantslessness seemed to be a common theme during the night.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at February 8, 2010 5:07 PM

Dustin, how do you know what burnt caterpillars smell like?

(I did not watch the Super Bowl or the ads, so I have no comment on that. Other than I imagine Betty White's commercial kicked ass, because Betty White can do no wrong.)

Posted by: MM at February 8, 2010 7:13 PM

The Letterman/Leno promo was the only thing that truly surprised me(besides the Saints WINNING, Holy Crap), and from what I have read about it, I guess Dave decided enough was enough.

Look, back in the day, when dinosaurs roamed the earth, aka when I was in high school, Jay was on Dave's show pretty frequently. For 2 decades it's been nothing but bitterness and passive-aggressive behavior between them. That stuff gets old.

Maybe Dave decided to "be the bigger man" and let bygones be bygones....age will do that to you.

Besides, it was damn FUNNY.

Posted by: lil_a at February 8, 2010 7:16 PM

"There's Bud Light in the refrigerator made of Bud Light!!"

Sorry, I had to get that out of me.

Posted by: MikeG at February 9, 2010 9:34 AM

I liked the Google one. Effective and not in anyway annoying. Just plain cute.

Posted by: grace b at February 9, 2010 8:16 PM

















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