web counter
 

The 20 Best Acting Affectations

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (37)

blog141009_kristen.jpg

20. The Stunned Bunny: Hair flop, then stammer, followed by a look that says you’re focusing really hard on what you’re trying to say. See Hugh Grant. — Mrs. Julien

19. Eeeeeeehhhh mouth: Slightly parted lips that look as though they should be accompanied by finger guns. See Christian Bale in American Psycho. — meh

18. The Head Crick: Tilt head side to side, in preparation for some serious ass-kicking. See Jason Statham, Wesley Snipes. — BierceAmbrose

17. The Clooney: Smug actor looking down, looking back up, and squinting through his eyebrows to seem sincere. See George Clooney. — Robert

16. The Clooney with the Head Tilt Variation: See Sam Elliott, Jeff Bridges. — Mrs. Julien

15. The Cud Chew: Opening and and closing of mouth multiple times between lines of dialogue, often punctuating with little “heh”s. See Late-period Robert Duvall. — sansho1

14. The Lip Bite: See Kristen Stewart. — Brittany

13. The Kidman: Once an actor has lost all ability to move their forehead due to Botox injections, she over-compensates by making their eyes go all bulgy and wide and spends virtually the entire film talking in a loud whisper (possibly to soften the harsh effect of the rest of their face). — Ashley

12. The Blank Stare for Comedic Effect: See Bill Murray. — John W.

11. The Overly Loud Laugh That “Charms” Everyone: See Julia Roberts. — figgy

10. The Non Blink: See Tobey Maguire. —Pissboy

9. The Lock Jaw: Characterized by delivering every line with a very deliberate tone, slightly above a whisper, by only moving one’s lips. See Dustin Hoffman. — Pissboy

8. The Lip Purse: Purse your lips, give a shrug, say your line. See Robert DeNiro. — odnon

7. The Dance: When all else fails, dance. See Paul Rudd, Christopher Walken. — Camilla

6. The Double: Repeating short lines of dialogue. See Robert DeNiro, Vincent Gallo. — Harry Coverts

5. The Chin Down Eyes Up Crazy Look : Can be used as the basis for your entire performance (75% of all psychotic killers) or to signify a sudden shift in mental illness or most of your basic demonic possessions. See Vincent D’Onofrino in Full Metal Jacket. — sandwich

4. Sideface Talkin’ a.k.a. Strokeface: See Sylvester Stallone, Drew Barrymore, and Holly Hunter. — Pissboy

3. The Vapid Stare of Nothingness As A Sign Of Sexual Desirability: Lowered eyelashes, dead eyes completely unfocused, mouth slightly open as if they can only breathe through their mouths. See Megan Fox, Scarlett Johansson. — figgy and Courtney

2. The Emphasis: Emphasizing certain words in a sentence, often for no discernible reason. See Christopher Walken. — ben

1. The Staccato: The short, forceful enunciation of individual syllables or words of dialog. See William Shatner. — admin









Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← The PC Term is "Hymenally Challenged" | Teen Movies And You | "Parenthood" Review | This Show Makes Me Want to Breed →









Comments

The Staccato + The Emphasis = Jeff Goldblum.

The Non-Blink + The Blank Stare for Non-Comedic Effect = Tom Cruise.

Posted by: PDamian at September 16, 2010 3:26 PM

Love.

Posted by: dammitjanet at September 16, 2010 3:28 PM

Head Title Variation? (#16)
Is that like a head stamp of Awesomeness, or something?

Posted by: Rykker at September 16, 2010 3:33 PM

It is if it's Sam Elliott!

Dude! I made the list. What care I for typos?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 16, 2010 3:45 PM

You just totally channeled that alien dude from Star Trek III, didn't you?

"Price I name, place you name, otherwise bargain noooo."

That is SO hot.

Posted by: Rykker at September 16, 2010 3:49 PM

i thought drew barrymore actually had a stroke a long time ago during the drug years?

Posted by: idleprimate at September 16, 2010 3:56 PM

Rykker - I was actually thinking of "Homercles cares not for beans!" from The Simpsons Duff Gardens episode, but whatever floats your boat
.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 16, 2010 4:00 PM

Ahaaaaa! The Cud Chew. WELL DONE sansho1.

Posted by: Ian at September 16, 2010 4:05 PM

The Chin Down Eyes Up Crazy Look - Malcolm McDowell in "A Clockwork Orange."

Posted by: Mattfactor at September 16, 2010 4:06 PM

Hmm...I assume the head tilt variety is for comedic roles. At least, whenever I see it happen, I start giggling at the idiot doing it.

Posted by: Robert at September 16, 2010 4:07 PM

Hey, my boat is seaworthy anywhere that a woman makes geeky tv show/movie quotes.
It's all good. KnowwhatImean, Vern?

Posted by: Rykker at September 16, 2010 4:07 PM

Must learn to keep mouth closed and eyes focused when working on computer. Then again, I might get a part in the next Transformers or Woody Allen movie.

Posted by: Mrs Smith at September 16, 2010 4:14 PM

Really Robert? Because when I see Sam Elliott and George Clooney do it, "doin' it" is all I can think of.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 16, 2010 4:18 PM

The temporary underbite - Michael Douglas, dramatic Robin Williams.

Posted by: Sunsneezer at September 16, 2010 4:21 PM

The Chin Down Eyes Up Crazy Look - Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter?

Posted by: Brenton at September 16, 2010 4:21 PM

I think the Anthony Hopkins is Standing There Mute With Your Heart Breaking Showing No Emotions Except in the Subtlest Movements of Your Eyes and Still Conveying More than Virtually Any Living Actor Is Capable Of.

With all that bold text it kind of feels like I'm yelling. Should it be ALL CAPS? Someone suggested that Little Julien looks like that freakyspooky looking little kid from The Middle today. With that and the yelling in print, I can only assume that someone forgot to tell me that it is Owen Meany day.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at September 16, 2010 4:34 PM

LOVE LOVE LOVE this list.

How about:

The Ghost - The single tear welling up in your eye, used exclusively in close up, named for Demi in Ghost.

Posted by: Notorious VMG at September 16, 2010 4:42 PM

Rykker - your comment just made me poop tiny little rainbows of joy.

Jim Varney - unsung hero of 80's style awesome/terrible. Ernest Scared Stupid was pure gold to my wee self.

Well done!

Posted by: redtuna at September 16, 2010 5:59 PM

The Panty Melter - Side ways glance with scrunched up puppy forehead and big doe eyes. See Joseph Gordon-Levitt in everything he has done (Except GI Joe because he wasn't in it...I said HE WASN'T IN IT) circa 1999

Posted by: redtuna at September 16, 2010 6:02 PM

wooo. yay me. I make people poop.

Now alls I gotta do is come up with a facial configuration that makes it happ'n, and I might could be in one o' them there movin' pichurs, like Sam Elliot done did.

Posted by: Rykker at September 16, 2010 6:14 PM

This is off-topic, and has nothing to do with this post, but Pajiba makes me want to pursue acting again. Alas, there is no room in the acting world for me. I'd have to quit everything and bust my cute round ass just to get a toenail in the door. And I will not be the next Raven Symone, nor the next Keke Palmer, nor Kyla Pratt, nor any other mediocre young black actress that gets chosen for mediocre black roles. I'd most likely end up in a Tyler Perry movie, all down on my poor black luck, living in a poor black life, until some affluent light-skinned woman shelters me and teaches me the ways of God and being light skinned. Fuck that.

...

But anyway, I just knew The Lip Bite would be here. That girl only stops biting her lip to mumble and stammer through lines.

Posted by: Brittany at September 16, 2010 6:18 PM

Seriously? No love for the Index Finger of Intimidation, perfected by Harrison Ford? Furrowed brow optional.

Posted by: Tranjo at September 16, 2010 6:22 PM

Oh, and I'm glad a tiny bit of my spastic rambling brought you some joy, redtuna.

Posted by: Rykker at September 16, 2010 6:36 PM

It's not a lip bite so much as a lip swallow, like she's trying to lazily eat her own face.

Posted by: Dingles at September 16, 2010 9:33 PM

The Overacting-by-Underacting punctuated by unnatural speech cadence and manipulation of sunglasses: David Caruso.

Posted by: jayco at September 17, 2010 1:03 AM

Nice one Notorious, but I think the one perfect tear of The Ghost should be renamed The Ackles, especially where teamed with the slightest of lip-quivers -- Moore may have been first, but Ackles delivers the quintessence.

Posted by: nigeltde at September 17, 2010 1:47 AM

#5: Skeet Ulrich nailed that shit in SCREAM during the big reveal.

Here's one that drives me nuts: The Bird. Moving ones head side to side while delivering dialogue. See Jennifer Love Hewett and Neve Campbell.

Posted by: TylerDFC at September 17, 2010 6:52 AM

Hilarious!

I really think Angela Bassett is the reigning actor of "The Lock Jaw" though.

And Ellen Barkin gives Sylvester Stallone a run for his money on "The Strokrface" for sure.

Posted by: invisiblewoman at September 17, 2010 7:13 AM

oops, i meant "Strokeface"!

Posted by: invisiblewoman at September 17, 2010 7:19 AM

Ellen Barkin? I'd stroke her face and as many other parts as she'd let me. (See: "Sea of Love.")

Posted by: , at September 17, 2010 12:25 PM

The Panty Melter (variation) - Side ways glance with squinty eyes and low gruff voice.

See: Tim Olyphant (Deadwood, Justified)

Posted by: bananapanda at September 17, 2010 12:54 PM

Woo hoo!
I'm on the list!
Even though I totally forgot what I wrote!

Posted by: Odnon at September 17, 2010 4:16 PM

My wife and I have always referred to "Chin down eyes pointed up crazy look" as "the Kubrick" 'cause it appears in every one of his films, usually multiple times.

Posted by: Jim Stewart at September 17, 2010 8:26 PM

My favorite: Tough Jaw, Scared Eyes. This is my nickname for Tamoh Penikett from BSG and Dollhouse. Clench jaw. Breath hard. Flare nostrils. Widen eyes.

Posted by: ChristianH at September 26, 2010 3:32 PM

Funny you should say that Jim because the first face that popped into my head was Jack Nicholson's in The Shining. Yes, definitely "The Kubrick".

Posted by: Lulu at October 9, 2010 9:57 AM

I adore the commentary on this web site, it really gives it that community feel!

Posted by: Asthenopia at January 4, 2011 11:04 PM

Exactly what some really good cd players for kids? My cousin is 5 years of age and for christmas I want to buy her a mp3 player, she loves my nano but I think it becomes difficult for her to utilize it. Are there give ones for kids?

Posted by: MP3 players for kids at March 18, 2011 7:00 PM