Ten Takeaway Lessons I’ve Picked Up from College-Themed Movies
With all the excitement, buzz, and apathy surrounding the release of Inglourious Basterds, most folks have seem to forgotten about one of the other movies coming out this weekend: Post-Grad. The Alexis Bledel movie is about a recent college graduate who is finding it difficult to find the right job, find the right guy, and figure out where her life is headed.
The problem, I think, is that Bledel’s character hasn’t watched enough college-themed movies. If she really wanted to find the right job and the right guy, all she needs to know are these ten words of wisdom that I’ve picked up over the years by watching college movies. And obviously the advice has worked. Look at me! I’m a happily married famous Internet personality!
Ten Takeaway Lessons I’ve Picked Up from College Movies
What is learning? It’s paying attention. It’s opening you up to the big ball of shit that we call life. And what’s the worst thing that could happen is you get bit in the ass. Well let me tell you my ass looks like hamburger meat, but I can still sit down. — Accepted
Ice is what happens when water gets too cold. — Real Genius
You can’t sing show tunes and be depressed! — Dead Man on Campus
No matter what time of day it is, you can find a Michael Caine or Gene Hackman movie playing on TV. — PCU
When it comes to relationships, everyone’s a used car salesman. Love people, just don’t trust the warranty. — With Honors
Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son. — Animal House
You can’t treat every situation as a life-and-death matter because you’ll die a lot of times. — Van Wilder (Also, that Circus midgets cannot hold their booze)
It’s not cheating if you spread peanut butter on your balls and let your dog lick it off. — Road Trip
Violent ground acquisition games such as football is in fact a crypto-fascist metaphor for nuclear war. — Back to School
True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend. — Old School
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