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Ten Once Celebrity Objects of Sexual Desire Who Have Fallen Out of Favor

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (85)



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Now that we’re approaching the 5th Annual Pajiba 10, we’ve had five years of Freebie Data from which to cull. In that time, there have been a number of celebrities with healthy staying power, particularly those now in the Pajiba 10 Hall of Fame. But there are others who have risen to great heights only to vanish. Not from the public’s consciousnesses, because most of the 10 celebrities below are as popular as they ever were, but from the laminated cards of our readership. You had your brief lust affairs of the mind with them, and now they are sexual afterthoughts. You’ve moved on to your Olyphants and your Bries and your Fassbenders. You are a fickle bunch.

I looked over the last four years of Freebie Lists (what do you do in your spare time?) and compared them to the first nearly 300 Freebie Members in yesterday’s Freebie List and have come up with something that’s not quite the Anti-10, but more akin to your sexual garbage bin, yesterday’s fantasies. Collectively, these 10 celebrities have moved on to your Freebie Friend Zone. You’ve lost that lusting feeling.

There is, however, still time to vote on this year’s list. Perhaps a few images can goose your libido, and perhaps you’ll rethink your Freebie List and add one of the Ten Pieces of Eye Candy in Year’s Past to this year’s list again. Here’s to rekindling:


10. Hugh Jackman

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9. Gerard Butler

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8. Daniel Craig

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7. Ewan Mcgregor

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6. Natalie Portman

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5. Tina Fey

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4. Jake Gyllenhaal

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3. Jon Stewart

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2. John Krasinski

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1. Clive Owen

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Comments

Jackman and Krasinski will live in my heart and loins forever. And I originally typed "lions" and that may ALSO be true. Animal magnetism or the ability to chew through bone or whatnot.

Posted by: Julie at June 23, 2011 3:03 PM

Good thing not a single one of them ever did a thing for me.

Posted by: Sarah at June 23, 2011 3:04 PM

I'll kill you. Never besmirch the lust I have for Krasinski. NEVAH!

You're a fart-face, Rowles.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at June 23, 2011 3:09 PM

Daniel Craig was still on my list! And somehoe Fassbender brainwashed me enough to nix High Jackman BUT BUT BUT he's a very close 6th.

Posted by: Sara H at June 23, 2011 3:10 PM

Also, I wouldn't reject any of these people.

Posted by: Sara H at June 23, 2011 3:11 PM

DANIEL CRAIG IS STILL ON THE LIST.

Posted by: Melody at June 23, 2011 3:12 PM

I think of some of these as classics, like Krasinski, who will always have a place in my bed. And others as "will NEVER touch my loins" like Butler.

But bottom line, there are just too many gorgeous people out there to limit myself to the same 5 (well, 10, actually) every year.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at June 23, 2011 3:15 PM

My desire for Clive Owen is still alive!

Posted by: Single Pringle at June 23, 2011 3:17 PM

Like I said, I have many, MANY alternates.

Posted by: jM at June 23, 2011 3:17 PM

Hmm. I haven't posted it yet but you've got probably 60% of my list on here. And that's only because a couple of them are already immortalized on the Hall of Fame list.

Posted by: Anne At Large at June 23, 2011 3:18 PM

Craig and MacGregor are still on my list.

I was expecting to see John Holloway in amongst those photos.

Haven't Portman and Butler been the subjects not only of ficklepickledom, but crossed over into backlash territory?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 23, 2011 3:18 PM

If no one else is using him, I'll take Daniel Craig.

Is Krasinski wearing a Dr Who scarf??

Posted by: Sbrown at June 23, 2011 3:19 PM

JOSH Holloway.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at June 23, 2011 3:19 PM

My list consists of Clive Owen only.

Posted by: Phat girl at June 23, 2011 3:22 PM

I move my finger one inch to use my turn signal. Why are these assholes so lazy they can't move their finger ONE FUCKING MEASLY INCH to drive more safely? You wanna know why? Because these rich bastards have to be callous and inconsiderate in the first place to make all that money, so when they get on the road, they can't help themselves.

Swoon. Just for that quote alone Clive Owen should have a permanent spot on the list.

Posted by: Scully at June 23, 2011 3:23 PM

I'd do Jon Stewart every day of the week and twice on Sunday. (Actually twice on Saturday, because sex is a holy pursuit on Shabbos.)

I wouldn't kick Daniel Craig out of bed for eating crackers, neither.

Posted by: MM at June 23, 2011 3:23 PM

Yes author, there's nothing like a fiercely defended smug opinion on a nonsensical topic to prove those long college hours weren't entirely wasted. So you're father drank himself to death, or are the ulcers interfering with the implosion of his liver ?

Posted by: Mr. Stitch at June 23, 2011 3:25 PM

And who said that men age better than women?

Posted by: APOCooter at June 23, 2011 3:26 PM

I'm sure the lions would enjoy such a delicious piece of meat, Julie, but why would you want to feed such lovely men to them?

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at June 23, 2011 3:26 PM

You ladies just can't make up your minds, can you? Too much man meat to choose from? I bet you prefer Golden Corral to a five-star restaurant, huh? So many men just TOSSED TO THE SIDE, and in such a short time.

You all disgust me.

Posted by: Kballs at June 23, 2011 3:28 PM

Mr. Stitch, you might want to spell check before you post an illegible comment on a completely frivolous post.

Posted by: Julie at June 23, 2011 3:28 PM

Krasinski would totally be on my list, but he grew up near my husband and I think was coached by my FIL for little league, so that might be awkward come Thanksgiving...

Posted by: McSquish at June 23, 2011 3:31 PM

Jon Stewart will ALWAYS be on my list, Dustin. How dare you. For shame.

Posted by: Aislinn at June 23, 2011 3:35 PM

I suppose we should all remember that this list is based on previous Freebie Lists and the current Freebie List. Go add your Five Celebrity Asses You'd Like to Tag to the official thread and make these numbers liars.

MORE KRASINSKI FOR ME!!

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at June 23, 2011 3:38 PM

How did we get a troll on this post of all posts? Wow....also Stewart is still on my list and it was very closely debated between him and Segel, but in the end Segel had Muppets on his side.

Posted by: Nimue at June 23, 2011 3:38 PM

You’ve moved on to your Olyphants and your Bries and your Fassbenders.

Bitch, you're the one who won't shut up about Brie. She's a pretty girl, why must you make her annoy me?

GAH!

Posted by: Jay at June 23, 2011 3:38 PM

Ha! Mr. Stitch. My father didn't drink himself to death! He wasn't a pussy. He overdosed on crack. A shitload of it. I suspect his liver didn't so much implose as it drifted off into happytown.

Posted by: Dustin Rowles at June 23, 2011 3:39 PM

Good going, Mr. Stitch. Your poorly phrased and barely legible "comment" just shat all over the pretend indignation and pseudo-horrified reactions to a goofy list. IS THAT WHAT YOU WENT TO COLLEGE FOR?!?

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at June 23, 2011 3:44 PM

FASSSSSBENDEEEERRRRRRRRRRR

Posted by: coveredinbees at June 23, 2011 3:45 PM

::whispers:: Fassbender is what I went to college for.

Posted by: coveredinbees at June 23, 2011 3:46 PM

Mr. Stitch reminds me of the indignant Amtrak passenger who pissed everyone off with her nonstop cell phone use. "Do you know how educated I am? Do you know where I went to school?" Yeah? Well, it doesn't make you any less of a preening jizz sock.

Posted by: Kballs at June 23, 2011 3:46 PM

Jon Stewart has graduated from my Five Freebies and entered what I like to call my "Hall of Fame." These are people that I've realized I would full-on leave my significant other for, if given the chance.
He is joined by Colin Firth and Paul Rudd, who have also dominated the top five for the past few years. It's only fair.

Posted by: Erin S at June 23, 2011 3:49 PM

I wasn't sure if that was a spam fail or a troll fail. Either way...fail.

I don't think anyone's forgetting about Fassbender, InkyLinky, mostly because you won't allow it.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at June 23, 2011 3:49 PM

I feel like Mr. Stitch's comment was meant for another thread... or another website entirely.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at June 23, 2011 3:52 PM

I was going to comment about having been in the presence of Clive Owen and his hotness, but the phrase "preening jizz sock" amused me too greatly too continue.

Posted by: KatSings at June 23, 2011 3:53 PM

I studied film, TV, and writing in college. So... scoreboard?

Also, Natalie Portman will never be off of my list. Never.

Posted by: RobP at June 23, 2011 3:54 PM

Clive will always be hawt. If he were mummified he would be hawt. If he had Heidi Montag's plastic surgeon, he would still be hawt.
Even if he dated a Kardashian, I would still hit that.
Even if he did reality telivision, I would so hit that.

Posted by: Magsie at June 23, 2011 3:54 PM

Your mom goes to college.

(oh my sweet lord when will I be allowed to quote Napoleon Dynamite again?)

Posted by: coveredinbees at June 23, 2011 3:56 PM

It practically killed me to cut Clive Owen from my top 5 (he was #6). Now after seeing that picture of him, staring deeply at me, I regret my decision.

Posted by: Arrogant Ambassador at June 23, 2011 4:00 PM

Obvious troll is obvious.

Oh and Smokin' and I have already laid claim to Daniel Craig. The rest of you had best step off.

Posted by: Melody at June 23, 2011 4:04 PM

i again & always love these peoples except Butler(i never was interested by him,i dislike his acting,i don't understand his appeal,he acts in bad movies,he dated with Anniston and other Hollywood easy chicks) and Jackman(ok,he looks nice but what is his last movie? worse :what is your last good movie?)

Posted by: carrie at June 23, 2011 4:05 PM

I would submit that the ONLY reason Daniel Craig has, as you say, "fallen out of favor" is that he hasn't been in a movie in donkey's years. Once Cowboys and Aliens comes out, he will be once again recognized for the hot-ass bastard that he is. That man is walking sex with a cold, blue stare.

Posted by: mona sterling at June 23, 2011 4:08 PM

Butler is still on my list! And if I had a slot for 6 and 7, Owen and Craig would still be there too. However, I thought (as many people seem to) that it might perhaps be time for some new blood on the list. The other gentleman are for the most part attractive, but not really my speed.

I don't get the Jon Krasinski thing at all, though. He looks like the doofus who comes to empty our confidential paper bin. And Hugh Jackman is only hot as Wolverine.

Posted by: Siege at June 23, 2011 4:15 PM

Redvines are decidedly inferior to Twizzlers!! Just because they are regional and hard to get does NOT make them a better product, and you ought to know that, damnit!!

Wait, this is the place for off topic, badly written, unintelligable rants, right?

Oh, and an article on the merits or crimes of various movie related food and drink, although probably done would be pretty interesting. NOT REDVINES THOUGH!!!

Posted by: Mrcreosote at June 23, 2011 4:21 PM

I will definitely take McGregor if no one else wants him.

Posted by: kimk at June 23, 2011 4:23 PM

While I won't speak on the men, Tina Fey and Natalie Portman most definitely haven't fallen out of favor.

Posted by: Alex00 at June 23, 2011 4:33 PM

Well shit. 4/5 of my list is on this list. I think that shows that I'm faithful to my fantasy men.

Posted by: Lemon Poundcake at June 23, 2011 4:48 PM

Ewan McGregor stays on the list no matter what you say!

Posted by: Cindy at June 23, 2011 4:49 PM

Mrcreosote, you made me laugh SO HARD and inappropriately that I might actually get in trouble at work. And where I work, that's no mean feat.

Posted by: MM at June 23, 2011 4:53 PM

Jon Stewart is smooth sexy incarnate, and forever will be.

Posted by: zeke the pig at June 23, 2011 5:06 PM

Yeah, I never thought Tina Fey would come off the list, but 30 Rock stopped being funny and I stopped being smitten.

Posted by: Lucas at June 23, 2011 5:12 PM

Should I link to Jackman's Lipton tea ad? Just to remind everyone?

There you go. Enjoy!

Posted by: Fredo at June 23, 2011 5:13 PM

Tina Fey only appeals to pseudo-intellectuals who think it is "cool" to jack-off to an uppity nerdy girl with glasses. Portman only appeals to those with pedo tendencies. They were never objects of mass appeal to begin with.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at June 23, 2011 5:19 PM

No no no no not Clive Owen, how how...
WHY PAJIBA?! WHY YOU DO THIS?!

Posted by: Blake Shrapnel at June 23, 2011 5:39 PM

Daniel Craig hasn't fallen out of my wifes favor. She gets extra napkins for his movies.

Posted by: logan at June 23, 2011 6:05 PM

Jackman and McGregor will forever be on my list. For. Ever.

Posted by: Lexie at June 23, 2011 6:09 PM

coveredinbees, you're just jealous because I've been chatting online with hot babes all day.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at June 23, 2011 6:31 PM

Daniel Craig and Clive Owen are not out of favour, thank you very much.

Posted by: Maryscott O'Connor at June 23, 2011 6:42 PM

The only problem with Twizzlers is when you break down and buy that little pack at the theater and remember how godawful loud it is to open.

That is the only problem.

And it's not really a problem. Just a situational thing. Better to buy them at the grocery store. Oh I made many a night a Blockbuster night with Twizzlers. And Ronnie the Bear loves them.

Posted by: Jay at June 23, 2011 7:09 PM

Jackman is still on my list. So hot.

Posted by: Malin at June 23, 2011 7:29 PM

Still love Ewan & Natalie.

Posted by: Snrub at June 23, 2011 7:43 PM

Ewan is still totally on my list! He's been on my list since I was old enough to know what the list was. Is it wrong that I've had a crush on the same man since I was 13 or so? If it is, then I don't want to be right!

Posted by: AlannaJudith at June 23, 2011 9:14 PM

What Erin S said about Jon Stewart. I definitely have a hall of fame thing, too, so I treat the Pajiba yearly list as a place to make a note of my latest flames more than the ones with a super long-lasting place in my heart.

Posted by: Shibuyama at June 23, 2011 9:29 PM

Clive Owen will ALWAYS be on the list.

You shut your dirty lips about my boyfriend Clive Owen not being on the list Rowles!! I'll turn Admin and his mooseballs of glory on you. I swear to God.

Posted by: Kelly at June 23, 2011 9:39 PM

I wouldn't kick any of them out of my bed for eating crackers.

Posted by: Rosa at June 23, 2011 11:48 PM

Objection! Objection on all counts!

1, 4, and 8-10 DO NOT belong on that list. I repeat, do NOT belong. They are far, far too attractive. Clive? My Clive? GTF out of here. Seriously. This is my board now. I've had 1/3 of a bottle of wine and my cat is about to make me let her outside. Don't mess with me.

Posted by: LBeees at June 24, 2011 3:59 AM

Ewan is a lifer for me.

Posted by: cheryl at June 24, 2011 8:25 AM

I still lvoe Tina, John and Jake but I'm glad people are apparently getting the fuck over Portman already because ohmygod srsly.

Posted by: Nadine at June 24, 2011 8:36 AM

Did you just compare Daniel Craig, Clive Owen, and Ewan McGregor with John Krasinski? Nuh-UH dude!

Posted by: Alexis at June 24, 2011 9:08 AM

That Hugh Jackman picture psycho killer. Why is he looking at me like that? The phone calls are coming from inside the house.

Posted by: Alexis at June 24, 2011 9:16 AM

All those people are hot, but Clive is definitely in the Fantasy Hall of Fame.

Except for #4. Gyllenhaal just unsettles me.

Posted by: Kala at June 24, 2011 9:30 AM

The problem with Twizzlers is that they're just a bit too large in diameter and inflexible to properly shove up your nose. They tend to get stuck, necessitating hospital visits and lengthly lectures from doctors.

Posted by: Speaking from Experience at June 24, 2011 9:46 AM

Only two women on the list vs. eight men.

That's because men are more faithful and less fickle than women.

*ducks*

Posted by: , at June 24, 2011 11:40 AM

Clive Owen... woof, that pic with those eyes looking at me, oh hell that just evokes goosebumps

Posted by: Lulu at June 24, 2011 11:51 AM

And yes it is me he's looking at

Posted by: Lulu at June 24, 2011 11:52 AM

Oh and Jackman should not be on this list either

Posted by: Lulu at June 24, 2011 11:58 AM

I never understood how mcgregor made the list. Scrawny, moley, with bad teeth. Just look at that picture. Yeesh.

And Redvines for the win.

Posted by: jimbob at June 24, 2011 3:32 PM

Looking at the freebies, and the comments here, I can't imagine that my beloved Clive has fallen out of favour. He's a classic. He deserves his own spot on the Hall of Fame.

Posted by: Nikkers at June 24, 2011 3:46 PM

Jon Stewart can look at me with those baby blues and sling arrows of comedic zing any day anytime.

Posted by: Ana at June 26, 2011 4:32 PM

Hrmm...Yeah, Natalie missed my list...mostly because I'm not into five-year-old boys. I've been meh for Tina for a while too...I think it was the Palin impersonation.

Posted by: NateS1973 at June 26, 2011 7:40 PM

jonn krasinski is still on my list of YES. Boy is he a cutie.
Ewan? forever as well. whatta cute guy.
the rest, eh?

natalie portman and tina fey are ladies i think are pretty great, but i don't know gentleman....the heart wants what it wants....what does it want if not them??

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Posted by: Internet Marketing at June 28, 2011 4:13 AM

People can make comments to express their opinions and even criticism about the topics being posted on the blog.

Posted by: Kayla at July 23, 2011 10:59 PM

This nice idea that all of the sudden develop into a new healthy involving tears is definitely yerning for ones sweeter attention. Many cultures on the planet nod to the present habit all children are generally familiar with.

Posted by: 转轮除湿机 at July 23, 2011 11:58 PM

And even if this does work, this won't get you that many players. There were only 7 players tagged this year, and three of them have already re-signed with their teams. The other four are Lance Briggs (very ticked off), Asante Samuel (slightly ticked off, from what I've read), Dwight Freeney (happy camper), and Cory Redding (I have no idea how he feels about it). So even if you got all the franchise players that were ticked off about it, that's maybe a handful of players a year if you're lucky, and only some of them are stars that would bring fans to your league. I don't see how that would make much of a difference in building an 8 team league.

Posted by: Mickie Wakeley at August 8, 2011 2:32 AM