Pajiba

Some of my friends call me Zoophilia. I call their pets 'dates'.

The Furry glossary apparently disagrees with your definition.
http://www.furcen.org/fgc/glossary.html#Y

Zoophilia
(n.) From the Greek 'zoo' meaning animal and 'philios' meaning deep love for friends, zoophilia is a deep emotional love for animals. Sometimes this is merely a concerned love and other times it is as much as an erotic love for animals. Not to be confused with bestiality which is the lusting after and unemotional attachment to sex with animals.

In short: bestiality is the soulless, lustful bonking while zoophiles will at least buy Fluffy dinner first

Yiffy!

I am slowly walking backwards away from this comment thread in an unthreatening way.

Easy. Eaaasy...

It's such a pity they had to be G rated. Because of this, Zoo, a beautiful movie about zoophilia got no love

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0874423/

Dustin, seek professional counseling as soon as possible. Zoophilia is, IMHO, disgusting.

Having said that (and this goes for everyone else), if your sexual fantasy involves having 14 inches of Seabiscuit shoved into one or more of your orifices, then who am I to judge. Just be careful, have a friend who owns a farm (or has keys to the zoo), always remember the lube, and keep away from the ass-wipe conservatives who can't appreciate the sexual exploration. Hey!

New aquaintance: "So, what does your husband do?"

Me: "He's a college professor."

NA: "What does he teach?"

Me: "Astronomy, Oceanography and Beastiology."

NA: "BEASTIOLOGY!!!!?????"

Me, annunciating slowly: "BEACH GEOLOGY."

I just remembered the person who not only makes some of the most bizarre porn films around but I think he's pretty bizarre even by bestiality standards so because this is a film site and all that I thought I'd share my knowledge. Obviously the director is Japanese. His name is Daikichi Amano. He's got a thing for eels, octopus and all kinds of seafood. They say you haven't lived until you see a sweet petite Japanese woman with eels coming out/in from her every orifice! Men who look like they would do brutal things to said women are also said to populate his films. Note to animal lovers: No animals are harmed or wasted during filming. After filming apparently they cook the fish and have a great meal. Fun fact: Sometimes a little fishy gets lost and pops out of a girl's vagina a week after filming or something.

If you really want to check out more go to genki-genki.com

(didn't provide a live link to make sure no one clicks on it accidentally.

How do I know all this? Don't ask :-)

P.S I'm presuming I've just destroyed any half decent reputation I might have garnered through previous posts. I just really had nothing better to do this evening! At least there's always Barbado Slim around so I won't be considered the only perv!

Barf, to be sure you are not the only perv, but you may be the only Maltese Perv.

Does Meet The Feebles count?

And barf: relieved to hear that no animals were harmed, though I do believe we have discovered a new depth to the human soul. God bless and god damn the internet.

You forgot Cujo, you DOUCHEBAG!

no love for the over 70 pound dog set.

Yeah, I actually didn't notice the
'Rated G' clause until just a minute ago. I haz teh Reading Comprhenshunz.

In the same vein of the 2 Girls 1 Cup thing, is it wrong that when talking about these types of stories the first thing I think about isn't the moral issue, but the fact that you can get like, ebola from doing this? I think I've been raised by too many health care physicians. I gagged at 2 Girls 1 Cup, but the whole time I was thinking "You're both going to get pinkeye! Wash your hands afterwards!"

Lindsey with an e, the lazy answer to your panda lovin' challenge would be Kung Fu Panda but I racked my brains a bit harder and came up with the answer which should have been at the number one spot on this list (yes, it is rated G).

*drum roll*

The movie is called Earth. It was released in 2007 and it has more animals than you can shake a very large Noah's Ark at. What's more? The animals don't talk like all the movies listed here. It's breathtaking and both adults and children can enjoy it. It will take you from the deepest ocean to barren deserts, wild jungles and beyond.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0393597/

Can I tell you how obnoxious these little icons and colored text taggy
things are!? argh

When it comes to "animals", I may REALLy love them (more so that most
humans I have to deal with)... but I'm not going to harrass, harang, bother
or mug them. Right DERES da line Mo-foes.

P.S I'm presuming I've just destroyed any half decent reputation I might have garnered through previous posts. I just really had nothing better to do this evening! At least there's always Barbado Slim around so I won't be considered the only perv!

Posted by: barf at November 30, 2009 4:58 PM

---------------------------------------------

Nice.

Keep in mind, I never...EVER, forget.

/EVER

I thought it was common knowledge that you were a perv B.Slim. Sorry if I let the cat out of the bag. (yeah, couldn't resist another animal reference)

P.S: Why should you forget?

Does this mean Ol' Yeller is a snuff film?

Lindsey, I agree with you. Several zooerasts have been guests of the county over the years, usually from doing Da Nasty with dogs or goats. One guy was caught schtupping Fido in his backyard in broad daylight.

Which poses a question. In Florida, 'sexual bestiality' isn't a crime except in the context of a sexual performance in front of a child. Most zooerasts are arrested for cruelty to animals. So the question is - how the hell do we know it's animal cruelty? Anyone think to ask?

I certainly don't know the actual answer to that, but I would expect that some pervs can cause pain and damage to certain, especially smaller, animals.
The horses probably didn't care. Dirty Whoores.

True_Blue, tanukis are the Original Teabaggers.

If you really want to check out more go to genki-genki.com

Posted by: barf at November 30, 2009 4:58 PM

I won't ever - ever - be doing that.

So the question is - how the hell do we know it's animal cruelty? Anyone think to ask?
Posted by: The Wanderer at November 30, 2009 7:36 PM

The animal can't give consent. So, technically, it's rape.

Well, I guess we see why the laws are vague. Animals are not capable of consent, at least not in the way humans would perceive it. Know how I know a horse 'consents' to do what I am asking? They dont squash me like a bug, because they sure could if they wanted to. Considering the ridiculous crap I see being done to horses every day of my life, a little lovin' is hardly the worst of their troubles. I'm sure they find it quite uninteresting. Humans are ill equipped to impress a horse in that department.

The Wanderer: After watching it, I looked up tanuki--they are the cutest mix of raccoons and dogs. I just wish we could get the Japanese to take _our_ mouthbreathing teabaggers and give us tanukis instead. Our collective IQ will go up substantially as a result.

(Insert obligatory Julia Roberts joke here.)

Posted by: , at November 30, 2009 11:48 PM

(inserts obligatory 'look who's making fun of the ill equipped' joke here.)

Chicken Run is number one because Mel Gibson plays the rooster. However, I really think a better number one would be the movie he's making right now called "The Beaver," where he goes everywhere with his hand up a beaver puppet.