I Am the Scavenger: 10 Films to Get You Through the Rest of The Year
You’re already waiting for Cloud Atlas (October 26th), Skyfall (November 9th), Lincoln (November 16th), The Hobbit (December 14th), Les Misérables (December 25th), and Django Unchained (December 25th), but what’s left in and around the blockbusters the rest of the year? Here are a few choice films to help you wile away the weekends until 2013.
1. For When You’re Bored and Need a Screwball Comedy to Wash Away All the Bad “Sons of Anarchy” Memories
3, 2, 1…Frankie Go Boom October 12th
Directed by Jordan Roberts (Around the Bend); starring Charlie Hunman, Chris O’Dowd, Ron Perlman, Lizzy Caplan, Chris Noth and Whitney Cummings. Frankie’s (Hunman) family is crazy and so, therefore, is he. Becoming clean and sober won’t necessarily fix anything, but Perlman in drag may make him laugh?
2. For Your Requisite October Scare
Sinister October 12th
Directed by Scott Derrickson (The Exorcism of Emily Rose, Hellraiser: Inferno); starring Ethan Hawke, Vincent D’Onofrio, Juliet Rylance and Fred Dalton Thompson. A true-crime novelist moves his family into a house where the previous owners were murdered, and expects what—A Christmas Story? Reap what you sow, people.
3. For When You Want to Sit Alone in a Theater, Feeling Those Sexy Feelings. (Don’t Get Caught Pee Weeing Your Herman)
Nobody Walks October 19th
Directed by Ry Russo-Young (You Won’t Miss Me) and co-written by Lena Dunham; starring John Krasinski, Olivia Thirlby, Dylan McDermott, Rosemarie DeWitt and Jane Levy. A family takes in a young filmmaker (Thirlby) and the ramifications are (so sorry) moist-making.
4. For the Saturday Night You Feel Like Kicking Some Ass
The Man with the Iron Fists November 2nd
Directorial debut by RZA, co-written by and starring RZA; with Russell Crowe, Lucy Liu, Pam Grier, Jamie Chung and Dave Bautista. A blacksmith in feudal China makes weapons—they come in handy when his small town is attacked. I don’t know what the hell Russell Crowe is doing there (testing cell phone trajectories)?
5. For the Day You Need a Hug and Some Inspiration
Rust and Bone November 16th
Directed by Jacques Audiard (A Prophet, Read My Lips); starring Marion Cotillard, Matthias Schoenaerts and Armand Verdure. A whale trainer suffers a horrible accident, but her new love remains by her side.
6. For the Afternoon You Want to Feel Like a Kid Again
Rise of the Guardians November 21st
Directed by Peter Ramsey (“Monsters vs Aliens: Mutant Pumpkins from Outer Space”); starring Hugh Jackman, Alec Baldwin, Jude Law, Chris Pine, Isla Fisher and Dakota Goyo. This fantasy imagines Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Sandman and the Easter Bunny as immortal guardians who protect children. When a bad entity attacks, they…throw presents and baby teeth?
7. For a Steamy Hot December Escape
Deadfall December 7th
Directed by Stefan Ruzowitzky (The Counterfeiters); starring Eric Bana, Olivia Wilde, Sissy Spacek, Kris Kristofferson, Charlie Hunnam and Treat Williams. Über hot siblings (Bana and Wilde) on the run with a load of cash from a casino robbery gone wrong. I wonder if Hanna is out there somewhere, maybe she could help.
8. For the Dark, Quiet Sunday You Feel Like Crying Out All Your Tears
Amour December 19th
Directed by Michael Haneke (The White Ribbon, Funny Games); starring Emmanuelle Riva, Jean-Louis Trintignant and Isabelle Huppert. Winner of the 2012 Palme d’Or, Amour examines the love between an elderly couple after the wife suffers a stroke.
9. For When You Want to Put on Your Camouflage and Yell, “Hell Yeah! ‘Murica!”
Zero Dark Thirty December 19th
Directed by Kathryn Bigelow (The Hurt Locker, Strange Days); starring Jessica Chastain, Chris Pratt, Joel Edgerton, Stephen Dillane, Mark Strong, Harold Perrineau, Scott Adkins and Taylor Kinney. The story behind Navy Seals hunting down Osama bin Laden.
10. For When You Want to See if Tom Cruise Can Still Do the Action Thing (and So We Can Talk About Scientology Some More)
Jack Reacher December 21st.
Directed by Christopher McQuarrie (The Way of the Gun); starring Cruise, Richard Jenkins, Robert Duvall, Werner Herzog and Rosamund Pike. Adaptation of Lee Child’s One Shot, a sniper kills five people and has nothing to say but, “Get Jack Reacher.” Former military policeman, Reacher (Cruise) has his own method of truth finding. (Xenu?)
Cindy Davis believes in popcorn.
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