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Get Rid Of The Tights. They Make Him Look "Faggy"

By Brian Prisco | Posted Under Seriously Random Lists | Comments (11)

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Superman’s been played by a shitton of actors — both through voice work and live action — throughout the years. Now that they are re-re-rebooting Superman again maybe probably but not, I remember Kevin Smith’s story about Jon Peters and his rules for rebooting Superman. No tights, no flying, and he had to fight a giant spider. This was the man that owned the rights to the project, and he was able to make stipulations about how Superman should be played. And Barbra Streisand’s former hairdresser — yes, that was Jon Peters — was afraid of making Superman too “faggy.”

So I checked five of the actors who’ve played Superman (according to IMDb) and checked to see whether or not they’ve ever done a gay role in Hollywood. And whaddya know? Pretty much most of them have. And give Tom Welling time now that Smallville’s wrapping.

  • Christopher Reeve — Deathtrap

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  • Brandon Routh — Zack and Miri Make a Porno

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  • Bobby Cannavale (played in an upcoming comedy sketch film ala Kentucky Fried Movie) — “Oz”

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  • George Newbern — Far Harbor

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  • Dean Cain — The Broken Hearts Club

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    Comments

    Posted by: Byrd at October 5, 2010 1:10 PM

    • Nothing will ever be as amazing as Kentucky Fried Movie. NOTHING! I know that was never suggested, but thought I'd point it out anyways.

    Posted by: The_wakeful at October 5, 2010 1:17 PM

    True Story....summer of 1982. My friend Pam moved in with me and my folks after we graduated high school. Every Sunday, we'd drive from our small town to the big city of Indy to go to a movie and out to eat. We were both pretty hot for Christopher Reeve in the wake of Superman and Somewhere in Time, so when we saw he had this mystery coming out, with the always fantastic Michael Caine, we were sold. So, we bought our tickets and watched the story unfold....and then came the kiss. We were....not expecting that.

    Posted by: dammitjanet at October 5, 2010 1:18 PM

    High School, 1977. My best friend and I decide to go see Kentucky Fried Movie. It's on a double feature. I drive. I don't know where the theater is, but somehow we find it. We walk in late to the first feature -- Flesh Gordon. Flesh is being attacked by giant Penisaurii monsters. My friend gives me "the look." She never let me forget it. We did a lot of giggling that night.

    Posted by: BWeaves at October 5, 2010 1:31 PM

    Jon Peters will always be Barbra Streisand's hairdresser to me.

    Posted by: BWeaves at October 5, 2010 1:33 PM

    "Gay R2-D2"

    Posted by: Jay at October 5, 2010 2:26 PM

    I remember being in the audience for "Deathtrap" & someone screaming "say it isn't so, Superman!" when Mr. Reeve kissed Mr. Caine...,
    I thought that kiss was one of the coolest things ever at th' time & both men were brave to do those roles...,
    Where th' hell is Dyan Cannon, btw?

    Posted by: Sly D. at October 5, 2010 3:50 PM

    I know, I know, Will & Grace doesn't count because it wasn't a MOVIE, but Cannavalle did play Will's cop boyfriend/husband for, like fifteen episodes across two seasons. And then there was The Night Listener where he played Robin Williams's husband, too...

    Oh, and Dyan Cannon seems to have vanished ever since David E. Kelley fell from favor at both Fox and ABC, because by the time The Practice became Boston Legal, Candice Bergen was re-ascendant, and that would have been too many actresses of a certain age on one show.

    Posted by: Jerry at October 5, 2010 4:53 PM

    Oh, and that whole Deathtrap thing...

    Nobody bashes Victor Garber for all the gay roles he's done (including as the original Clifford on Broadway), and Reeve played gay at least once on stage (thinking of Lanford Wilson's Fifth of July on Broadway).

    Posted by: Jerry at October 5, 2010 5:10 PM

    There's nothing sadder than a sad, Japanese man.

    Posted by: Jackseppelin at October 5, 2010 5:45 PM

    Oh God, how has nobody mentioned that Brandon Routh and Justin Long look exactly the fucking same in that picture? That looks like one of those things where someone Photoshops Sad Keanu's face onto a bunch of kids at a birthday party but in real life. Justin Long looks like Brandon Routh's Mini Me.

    Posted by: Jim at October 7, 2010 5:11 AM