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Gaze Into the Abyss, And the Abyss Gazes Back: A Year In Bad Movie Posters

By Rebecca Pahle | Seriously Random Lists | December 8, 2015 |


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Flavorwire has a slideshow of the year’s best movie posters that’s like porn for design addicts—I would also add the poster for Drafthouse Films’ rerelease of Roar—but God dammit, there’s something to be said for schadenfreude, too. Presenting: The worst movie posters of 2015. Some indie movies. Some big-budget studio flicks. No excuses.

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Chill with the airbrushing and the Photoshop Curves adjustment. Jesus.

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Get out of that ear, little man!

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Guyliner: The Movie.

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Is this some sort of new dance that I don’t know about?

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I don’t mind the crudeness (it’s juvenile, but so is Ted 2) so much as I mind the punctuation. That tagline would clearly flow better with an ellipsis instead of a comma, right?

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“I’m falling through the air surrounded by shattered glass and also shooting at something. Yawn.”

jupiter-ascending-character-poster-sean-bean.jpg

Being your run-of-the-mill character poster, this one isn’t too awful in terms of design*, but who picked a shot of Sean Bean where he has that facial expression? “Huh? Space bees?”

*Though does Bean look oddly squished to anyone else? Am I just used to him bulkier? Is it an odd angle?

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This may be because I spend way too much time on the Internet, but can we not have an Alvin and the Chipmunks poster with the word “Furry-ous” on it? Also, please tell me that Polar Express reject is driving into back into the Uncanny Valley.

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Which is worse: The lazy poster that clearly took some marketing intern’s 5-year-old son’s pet goldfish three minutes to put together, or the one that at least tried to do something visually interesting, but Paul Blart’s crotch is flying towards your face?

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Larry Gaye: Renegade Male Flight Attendant.

LARRY GAYE: RENEGADE MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT.

Danny Pudi and Patrick Warburton are in this. SHAME *ding* SHAME *ding* SHAME.

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My God, it’s so subtle. Another (better) Felt poster ended up on Flavorwire’s best of list, by the by. I guess it all depends on your tolerance for visual vagina metaphors.

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“For the first time you will see the activity.” The fuck is this?

And, finally, all of these: Whitewashed Egyptian mythology by way of Lisa Frank.


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