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Five Movies Zac Efron Should Remake

A Seriously Random List / Dustin Rowles

Seriously Random Lists | April 15, 2009 | Comments (36)

Earlier today, Cinematical’s Erik Davis put the fear of God into the Internet when — after learning that Zac Efron was obsessed with Back to the Future — he had the audacity to suggest that someone might someday offer Efron the part of Marty McFly.

Not going to happen. Audiences will accept remakes of even the most beloved horror flick, but if someone tried to remake and/or reboot Back to the Future, this country would go crowbars-across-America and chisel motherfucking California into the Pacific Ocean. Marty McFly is sacred — part of the holy trinity of movies that can never, ever be remade (along with It’s a Wonderful Life and The Apartment).

So, put those fears aside, folks. It’s not going to happen. But, Zac Efron has been in the news a lot lately. He appeared on “SNL” over the weekend; he’s up for a role in Jonny Quest; he recently backed out of a remake of Footloose, and he’s starring in the unofficial Life Father, Like Big remake this weekend. The knowledge that Efron could actually be considered, even hypothetically, as a new generation Marty McFly and the fact that he’s poised to be the next big acting superstar got me thinking. What remake would I really like to see Zac Efron appear in?

So, without further ado, here are the five roles I’d most love to see Zac Efron take:

5. Lawrence Dane’s Braedon Keller in Scanners

4. Drew Barrymore’s Casey Becker in Scream


3. Sam Jackson’s Russell Franklin in Deep Blue Sea


2. The Ox in Apocalypse Now (scene unavailable on YouTube)


1. Phil LaMarr’s Marvin in Pulp Fiction


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Comments

Now thats a list i can get behind .

Posted by: gilp at April 14, 2009 9:58 PM

I think we should chisel California into the ocean anyway. California and Texas. It takes too fucking long to drive across those states.

And Zac Efron should play Pizza the Hut in the remake of Spaceballs.

"He ate himself....TO DEATH!"

Posted by: stardust savant at April 14, 2009 10:04 PM

Can Efron also play the guy who was dipped in toxic waste in the inevitable remake of Robocop?

Posted by: George at April 14, 2009 10:11 PM

How about Blue Lagoon, that should be about his depth as an actor.

Or maybe he can be the pretty boy from Lucas.

How about he takes over the Scot Baio role in Zapped.

Maybe he is just hiding a thing for Michael J Fox and should do Teen Wolf.

But whatever he does, he should leave Back to the Future the fuck alone.

Posted by: richmac at April 14, 2009 10:19 PM

I see what you did there. . .you scamp.

Posted by: coveredinbees at April 14, 2009 10:26 PM

Can Efron also play the guy who was dipped in toxic waste in the inevitable remake of Robocop?

Sorry about earlier, here's the toxic waste link.

Posted by: George at April 14, 2009 10:30 PM

I got another one...

How about Joe Turkel's Dr. Eldon Tyrell from Blade Runner?

Posted by: stardust savant at April 14, 2009 10:31 PM

I see what you did there. . .you scamp.

Posted by: coveredinbees at April 14, 2009 10:40 PM

Ew double post.

Posted by: coveredinbees at April 14, 2009 10:43 PM

I heartily endorse this product and/or Random List.

Sometimes, Dustin, you get just these perfectly right.

Posted by: figgy at April 14, 2009 10:47 PM

Omid Djalili's Gad Hassan from The Mummy, aka the beetle in the brain.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUyxPo4GTFc

Posted by: branded at April 14, 2009 10:55 PM

DOES HE LOOK LIKE A BITCH?

Why yes, yes he does.

Posted by: Jaci at April 14, 2009 11:04 PM

And Zac Efron should play Pizza the Hut in the remake of Spaceballs.

"He ate himself....TO DEATH!"

Posted by: stardust savant at April 14, 2009 10:04 PM
____________________

Brilliant!

Posted by: Mary at April 14, 2009 11:07 PM

anna faris in observe and report


oh, too soon?

Posted by: gp at April 14, 2009 11:42 PM

They ate me , a fucking shark ate me !!!!

Posted by: gilp at April 14, 2009 11:54 PM

Way too soon some of us have not seen the fucking movie yet

Posted by: gilp at April 14, 2009 11:55 PM

what? i gave away something there?
have you not be listening?

Posted by: gp at April 15, 2009 12:04 AM

Well we know she fucking dies now.

Posted by: gilp at April 15, 2009 12:07 AM

ah. you -haven't- been listening.
over the weekend there was a big ole thread where everyone was talking about date rape.
i won't see it until tomorrow, and this may or may not be a spoiler to you, but anna's consent to have sex with seth in the movie was highly debatable.
and debate there was.

zac should be used like the meat puppet he is was all i was saying.

Posted by: gp at April 15, 2009 12:14 AM

The Apartment? I always thought in the right hands, it could be remade well. Not in the hands of Zac Efron, of course, but a crew that was tolerable and talented.

Granted, all I can come up with right now is
C.C. Baxter: Ryan Gosling
but still...

Posted by: Jim Doggie at April 15, 2009 2:19 AM

He should play Leonardo di Caprio's role from What's Eating Gilbert Grape?. Zac was born ready to play that role.

Posted by: YeahButNoBut at April 15, 2009 4:18 AM

How about the Rebel soldier that gets strangled by Darth Vader in Star Wars first scene!

"uh....argh...diplo..mati aaaaaaargh"

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 15, 2009 7:22 AM

The tollbooth scene in the Godfather was made for him. Not the rest of the movie JUST THAT SCENE!! In slo mo.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at April 15, 2009 7:33 AM

...this country would go crowbars-across-America and chisel motherfucking California into the Pacific Ocean

Let us know if you need any help. My fellow Brits and I will be more than happy to help preserve this great cinematic institution from the horrow of cheesy tween remakes.

Posted by: embertine at April 15, 2009 7:52 AM

OH! OH! Terminator remake, he can replace Bill Paxton as the punker that gets shown his still beating heart by naked T-101.

(no problem if they take artistic license and add a Terminator on human ass rape in there)

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 15, 2009 7:58 AM

Funny, I always thought Zac(k) was a boy's name.

Posted by: Kolby at April 15, 2009 9:50 AM

"...he’s starring in the unofficial Life Father, Like Big remake this weekend."

First off, you mean "Like Father...", unless there was some Japanese ripoff of Big called "Life Father".

Second of all, don't you dare insult "Like Father, Like Son". It was good the first...well maybe it was a little...eh, ok it was shit. Seriously, if you're gonna rip of "Vice Versa", you're gonna have to do better than Kirk Cameron. (Dudley Moore and Judge Reinhold are tied in my book.)

Hey...there's a remake Zac Efron can do without offending anyone...Vice Versa. With Carrot Top as his dad, and the alternate ending where they fall off the train and get flattened!

Posted by: Doctor Controversy at April 15, 2009 10:19 AM

Not really sure I'm ok with that!! better ask my friends met on ==== Agelessmate.com ==== know what? I do think people I met there are hot and sincere! Desipte the actual so-called Age Gap, we get along together splendidly!! and I'm even thinking about romance there!! lol

Posted by: tracy at April 15, 2009 12:57 PM

At first, I thought, NO NO NO why would we need to see Zack Efron in any godamn thing?!!!!

Then I hit the play button and....YESYESYESYES.

It so made my day.

Posted by: yocean at April 15, 2009 12:57 PM

If Robocop is ever re-made (BLASPHEMY!), Efron only qualifies to be Mr. Kenny: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9IscZMYYw0

Posted by: Clarence Boddicker at April 15, 2009 1:58 PM

Pulp Fiction?

Maybe he should play Marcellus, if only so he could be in the scene with Zed.

Posted by: David McTaintwaffle at April 15, 2009 2:38 PM

Slap him into a schoolgirl skirt for a live-action version of Legend of the Overfiend. Heck, a bit of makeup trickery and he can earn his paycheck by playing all of the schoolgirls.

Posted by: longcoat000 at April 15, 2009 4:38 PM

How about "Thunder" in Big Trouble in Little China? It would be great to see him blow up like a balloon and explode into little chunks of brain, flesh, and hair gel.

Posted by: logar at April 15, 2009 7:12 PM

I've got it:
Zac Efron as Bambi in Bambi Vs. Godzilla. Gore, guts and mayhem galore!
Rated G.

Posted by: Kamikaze Feminist at April 16, 2009 6:38 AM

definitely braedon keller.

Posted by: Sally at April 17, 2009 1:27 AM

only comment...

could play rob lowe's baby bro.

Posted by: kikz at April 17, 2009 7:32 AM