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Christian Bale: A Heartbreaking Work Of Staggering Gross

By Joanna Robinson | Seriously Random Lists | June 19, 2011 |


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Cute
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Dance Break!

Encore!

Fabulous
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Tasty
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Fiery
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No. No thank you. No. Get the f*ck outta here with this auschw*tz bullsh*tz.
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A F*CKING YEAR LATER? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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No, stop. Stop it. STOP.
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Film School Rejects is reporting that Darren Aronofsky is courting Christian Bale to play 600 hundred year-old Noah. Yeah, that Noah. The one with the boat. Cole Abaius writes, "No doubt it would involve losing 40 pounds, growing a formidable white beard, and giving himself diabetes." Stop, Bale, seriously, stop. My ventricles and valves can't take it and neither, I suspect, can yours.
[via FSR]


Joanna Robinson had forgotten Christian Bale was in Shaft. SHUT YOUR MOUTH.


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