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Celebrating With 'Archer': Seriously, I Had Something For This List

By Jodi Smith | Seriously Random Lists | June 29, 2015 |


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It’s the week of July 4th and that means one thing: The Pajiba 10. And that means I could probably write anything here and no one would notice because bangable celebs are being gif’d in comment threads and lions are being moistened. So: BUTTBOOGERWADPICKLEWOMPWOMP.

Ahem.

This week also means ‘Merica will be celebrating independence with cookouts, beer, exploding things, fireworks, and beer. Since you damned weirdos beg for Archer posts so much, I thought we would look to Sterling and the gang for party pointers.
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1. Remember the environment during your celebrations this weekend. Try to use renewable resources to cook your food.
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2. Cornhole and badminton are lame games. Introduce something new to the family!
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3. Remember to pace yourself when drinking.
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4. This holiday is made for overindulging. Just like all of the other days of the American year.
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5. Don’t leave crumbs and chunks of food all over the damned place.
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6. Do remember to buy enough food to feed everyone.
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7. Be careful around fireworks.
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8. Party like you ate a body cast made of cocaine.
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9. Finally, wherever you end up partying, don’t overstay your welcome.
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