Pajiba

Mr. Rogers was NEVER in danger of being pervy (despite the In Living Color skit with Jim Carrey). The guy was an awesome straight shooter until he died.

83 percent of people who argue that “Dungeons and Dragons” was the greatest Saturday morning cartoon of all time will die a virgin.

You are such an asshole.

I get so much more joy out of these when I read them in the style of Norm MacDonald as Larry King.

Ernie is the best Sesame Street character and thus this list is negated for me. Good day sir. Isaidgoodday!

Although, Grover does rock.

Also, even putting the word perv in the same sentence as Mr. Rogers is offensive.

Dashing and daring
Courageous and caring
Faithful and friendly with stories to share
All through the forest
They sing out in chorus
Marching along as their song fills the air

Gummi Bears!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere
High adventure that's beyond compare
They are the Gummi Bears

Magic an mystery
Are part of their history
Along with the secret of gummi beary juice
Their legend is growing
The feel pride in knowing
They fight for what's right in whatever they do

Gummi Bears!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere
High adventure that's beyond compare
They are the Gummi Bears

I think I prefer Fraggle Rock, but there's something to be said for the fact that I know the second verse of the Gummi Bears theme. Granted, I think that something would be said about me.

As far as hot cartoon dudes go, “X-Men’s” Gambit is the hunkiest.

YES! YES! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That is, I agree, Dustin, as you probably already know from the spirited "Gambit is gross vs. SHUTUP HE IS THE HOTNESS" debates over on Facebook.

"Wonder Pets! Wonder Pets! We're on our way..."

::puts pistol in mouth::

BLAM!

(Word. -- DR)

Kidd Video was worse than anything else ever created

83 percent of people who argue that “Dungeons and Dragons” was the greatest Saturday morning cartoon of all time will die a virgin.
Who besides TK makes that argument? I have trouble even getting people to remember this cartoon existed. (Dr. P: You guys remember that cartoon with the kids that take a rollercoaster into a magical land? One of them was a completely incompetent wizard and there was a baby unicorn, maybe? Remember? Everyone else: you probably imagined that. Or were on crack.) That and Pirates of Dark Water* were apparently watched by nobody but me.
* Although I figured out the title of that one by googleing "cartoon pirates bird thing" and it was the first result, so maybe not.

When I was a kid Looney Toons ran for two hours every Saturday morning. To me, they were "Saturday morning cartoons." Perhaps that wasn't the case for everyone and the pattern definitely shifted in the eighties. But I simply cannot let anyone argue that anything aired on a Saturday morning anywhere was ever better.

NO WAY is that Steve...No. I...I refuse to believe it. Also goddamnit today's cartoons fucking suck compared to the shows that were on when I was little. Thank god for Hub otherwise I'd never get my ShirtTails fix.

Thank you! I always secretly wished that Max would just bitch slap his sister. That condescending way she would say his name drove me insane when my son was still young enough to enjoy the show.

* Although I figured out the title of that one by googleing "cartoon pirates bird thing" and it was the first result, so maybe not.

Goddamn Niddler.

Also M.A.S.K., Bravestarr, Silverhawks, and of course Captain N: The Game Master.

Love Muppets, hated Muppet Babies

LOVED D and D cartoon with the cleverly named unicorn "Uni".

I too thought Gambit was handsome, especially with that faux Cajun accent the voice actor used, calling everyone "Cher".. although then my brain segues to Caroline on Bones doing the same thing..

Mom said I used to be almost hypnotized by Mr. Rogers so I can see that whole soothing thing going on.

I'm pretty sure that 12% statistic applies to all children.

If we are indeed counting "Ren & Stimpy" as a children's cartoon*, then the character I'd most like to get drunk with would be Ren. I think for one night it would be pretty awesome to hang with him and watch as he overreacts to even the most minor perceived slight and then fucks shit up. Plus, being an Asthma Hound Chihuahua, he'd likely be a pretty cheap drunk.

If we aren't counting "Ren & Stimpy" as a children's cartoon*, then the character I'd most like to get drunk with would be Daffy Duck. Same reasons, but taking into account the whole dog/duck thing. I'm not specist.

*We really should not be counting "Ren & Stimpy" as a children's cartoon. Parents who let pre tweens watch it need some parenting of their own, and a good meaty smack to the head.

Hot Steve makes me blush.

Ugh. My son grew up with Calliou, Oswald (blue octopus voiced by Fred Savage who had a pet wiener dog named Wienie. For real.) Oobi, Wonder Pets, etc...They were all excruciating. Now my 19 month old has discovered Yo Gabba Gabba and I see it starting all over again. However, my son is now 10 and is obsessed with the tween shows on Disney XD and Nick. I'm not sure which is worse. Have you SEEN these shows? These kids on them? Zach and Cody? The Wizards of Waverly place brood?? My God. It's just awful to watch. Who writes these shows these days?? Clarissa Darling would kick all these kid's collective asses and diary-video tape it cheerfully at the end of her day. Hell even Lizzie McGuire could.

I'll hear nothing bad said about Spongebob. It is part of my growing list of mediocre shows that have one good episode thanks to a great third act reveal. There are two patron saints of this; the spongebob episode where they form a band and the Fresh Prince episode where Uncle Phil plays pool.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANk8xlsp1pQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7u1SGsT51w

I remember D&D, of course, and the shitfit parents threw about it leading to Satanism...ahh the 80s.

Now do you remember the Conan the Barbarian ripoff that played after it (at least on the Dallas-Ft. Worth CBS affiliate)? Kind of a Conan/He-Man blend, but with a glowing sword strapped to his arm (thanks, Luke Skywalker) and riding some kind of lizard-horse?

But despite the onslaught of the 80s schlock, it was always the classics for me: Looney Tunes, 3 Stooges, Popeye, Woody Woodpecker, Rocky & Bullwinkle.

Caillou and his gender-indeterminate parents. I think it's a Canadian plot to prepare future generations for the inevitable mothership. I couldn't abide that show. It made Tele-tubbies seem controversial.

Wizards of Waverly Place and Suite Life of Zack and Cody...best arguments for forced sterilization EVER. There's a lot of stinkers out there for tweens, but those were NEVER allowed to be played in my house. Give a clockwork-orange-style dose of iCarly or hell, even That's So Raven, but those little Zack and Cody fuckers...makes me want to bring back corporal punishment.

And wasn't that Yo Gabba Gabba dude in The Blackeyed Peas?

"Animaniacs" and "Batman: The Animated Series" are 2 of the greatest cartoon series in the history of our planet. This cannot be denied.

You're not joking. The Yo Gabba Gabba DJ is fucking terrifying! I worry for my child's mental state, though she seems to find him fascinating.

Any love for Charlie and Lola? Very imaginative books and TV series. Entertaining and not annoying. I can't accurately explain the book illustrations, but they are very charming. So is the series.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_and_Lola

Mrcreosote is right.

Also, Max and Rubie's parents are either in jail, or in the basement doing meth. WHY DON'T THEY EVER SHOW THEM? ???

I watched Ren & Stimpy religiously as a child. I rented the three-episode set with "Stimpy's Invention", the nature show spoof, and "Space Madness" on it so many times I completely destroyed the tape. And I consider myself... okay, not well-adjusted, but definitely functionally adjusted. Most of the time.

Also, AAAAAHHHH MR. GOODBODY! AAAAAHHHH!!! I remember that show coming on after Sesame Street for awhile. That guy scared the hell out of me. I mentioned the show to my friends a few years ago and they all just stared at me the way my childhood friends used to whenever I did the "Happy Happy, Joy Joy" dance. Thank you so much for acknowledging that show's existence and reawakening all of my childhood demons. I'm going to go curl up in a corner now, rock back and forth, and quietly sing a song about a hhh-whale.

The premiere of The Real Ghostbusters was among the biggest disappointments of my entire life. The movie was so great, and the cartoon was so terrible.

I'm pretty sure that Caillou gives babies unreasonable expectations of how calm parents should be. What normal parent could possibly live up that kind of standard?

"Now do you remember the Conan the Barbarian ripoff that played after it (at least on the Dallas-Ft. Worth CBS affiliate)? Kind of a Conan/He-Man blend, but with a glowing sword strapped to his arm (thanks, Luke Skywalker) and riding some kind of lizard-horse?"

Pssst. That would be Thundar the Barbarian with his fabulous sun sword. And don't forget his sorceress side-kick and his good buddy Ooglar the Mook.

Lord that was a godawful cartoon.

You want to know who's worse than Ruby? Peppa Pig. Watch that cartoon if you want to witness an der sibling whose eyes you want to gauge out.

I was 10 when Pokemon mania first hit these shore and I would have sold my family for a pack of Pokemon collectible cards. The TV show was my reason for life. I saw an old episode it recently and it might not be the worst cartoon ever made, but it's pretty fucking close. I can't believe my parents indulged me with that stuff. I mean, I made them take me to a movie...

JesusGod, how could I have forgotten how much I've wanted to bone down with Remy LeBeau since before I even knew what boning down meant? Gambit was, is and will always be the sex.

Bonus points to whomever casts Josh Holloway as that smoothassilk, gumbo-eating, gambling sonofabitch

I devoted a large slice of time to making sure I saw every episode of ReBoot!.

I'm a huge fan of Rocko's Modern Life. I can't think of many cartoons I would put above that.

Okay, serious question.

Does anyone remember, or has anyone heard of a cartoon from the early-to-mid '80s, it ran (I think) on ITV and had a character whose name was probably longer than any of its given episodes? It was called (let's hope I can spell this) Murun Buchstansangur and its episodes were all the three or four minute range, it focused on a--I don't really know what the character was as far a species goes, he was completely round, save for the four limbs, was gray in hue and a messy mop of auburn hair. He was so tiny that he lived in the crack occupying a space in someone's kitchen, but if anyone lived in the house it was never broached. Apart from him, he had an assortment of friends and acquaintances who were all the same as him and the whole thing was done in voiceover. It was pretty melancholy and contemplative, focusing on a kind of hermit character and that character's tolerance of his caring, but self-absorbed and high-strung friend (I think she had blonde and curly hair and wore a red dress), his cousin Rossiter (who he didn't like), Nigel--who intermittently dated the aforementioned blonde), who would be the '80s equivalent of a douche? Apparently, it had more than fifty episodes but it just dropped off the planet before anyone got around to preserving more than, four episodes.

It this registering? I remember loving it when I was small, but it's as if most of the series never existed at all. I doubt that my being in Canada doesn't help my case. I'd love to find that and just can't.

Jo "Mama" Besser I found this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJHGg9c86fs

"The best children’t television theme song of all time is “Fraggle Rock.”

Beg to differ, The Bannana Splits theme song was and is the greatest. With Johnny Quest a close second.

Don't believe me?

http://tinyurl.com/ydum878

Thank you clancys_daddy

Best children's cartoon of the 90's? Duckman.

Well...I watched it as a kid...

Let me qualify "Slimer..." The *orignal* "The Real Ghostbusters" was one of the best cartoons, ever, and IMO has aged pretty well. It was when they bowdlerized it with Slimer that it went downhill.

In.
My.
Opinion.

Bobby's World was great. Except for his brother Derrick\Derek, hated that kid.

We are also leaving out 2 shows which were the pinnacle of Saturday morning hilarity: Freakazoid and Earth Worm Jim!

In particular, the Freakazoid theme song was pure brilliance.

GRAVEDALE HIGH!!!!!! HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD I AM GRIPPED BY NOSTALGIA, GRIPPED I SAY.

Steve licking his teeth like that makes me want to hit him with a car. Ugh.

If we're going for quality, Batman: The Animated Series wins, hands down. That show still holds up. Animaniacs is the James Dean of cartoons, dying long before its time.

And now you guys made me remember Shirt Tales, which made me remember Paw Paw Bears (the weird Native American/Gummy Bear/Voltron hybrid?) and now I'm trying to figure out exactly how much of my childhood was devoted to sitting mindlessly in front of the TV.

Dr. Pisaster, Pirates of Dark Water. Ah yeah, pretty fucking good show.

I watched all the Sid and Marty Kroft shows (because I'm old), ALL of them, even the ones that hardly played in the rotation therefore no one remembers them like The Bugaloos and Lidsville, and I can assure you that I did not become a Republican; but come to think of it, most of my age group did become hyper-conservative so maybe your theory is correct.

Did anyone else watch Pepper Ann? HIGHlarious show. And good for you.

Also, poor sad folks, you're all wrong. Wrong, all of you. Best kids' show ever was obviously Pee-wee's Playhouse. Phil Hartman, Laurence Fishburne, S. Epatha Merkerson, Mark Mothersbaugh, Danny Elfman, shall I continue?

Mecca lecca hi, mecca hiney ho.

"I'll hear nothing bad said about Spongebob. It is part of my growing list of mediocre shows that have one good episode thanks to a great third act reveal. There are two patron saints of this; the spongebob episode where they form a band and the Fresh Prince episode where Uncle Phil plays pool."

Yes! A thousand times yes!!! I love both of those episodes.

jim of the lower case,

Thank you. People always act like I'm making up that Gretsky, Jordan, and Bo Jackson cartoon.

Side note: people also always pretend that they don't remember Parker Lewis Can't Lose either.

Shonda,

Do you mean the Pepper Ann who was much too cool for 7th grade? The same Pepper Ann who was like one in a MILLION!

Sorry, I used to love that theme song.

Final verse of A-Ha's 'Take on Me' = theme tune to Fraggle Rock.

ONCE HEARD CANNOT BE UNHEARD

Yes, Gambit was def. the hunkiest. My young gay self always wanted to be him when we played 'X-men' games. 'Psshaw cartoon Wolverine.

Caillou? He the devil.

My 2 year old is finally beginning to lose interest and, thankfully, is moving on to live action stuff like Gabba and Zoboomafoo.

And, no, Caillou is not polite and wonderful. He's a whiny little bastard. AND WHY IS HE BALD?

Yeah, yeah. Thundarr the Barbarian was the one. It was shitacular.

Absolutely down with the Animaniacs + Tiny Toons inclusions, too.

I also watched "Starblazers" and "Battle of the Planets" religiously as a young'un. (2nd grade, playing "G-Force" on the playground...oh yeah, I was that kind of dork.) I started watching "Starblazers" on Netflix recently and was amazed at how heavy-handed and dark everything was, and that I totally missed all that as a 7-year-old. And, of course, my 6 year old thought it was boring. *sigh*

Aw, I like Caillou.

Also, Phineas and Ferb is goddamn excellent, funny, entertaining cartoon and I demand you watch it immediately. (It's streaming on Netflix.)

*Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated*

Proof that Sat Morning was not just for kids--

Batman:The Animated Series
Batman Beyond
Gargoyles
Darkwing Duck
Animaniacs
The Tick

Also, does anyone remember 'Mighty Max'? It was about a kid who saved the world with time travel, an ancient sage who was also a chicken (fowl), and an ancient Greek warrior. His mom was a single mother (rare for kids TV) who was also an archeologist.

Goddam that was the shit.

Also, was there a 'Biker Mice from Mars'? Or was Mom putting LSD in my cheerios.

Take back what you said about Fred Rogers, Dustin. As a critic you deserve a little give over a lot of your opinions, but you are SO out of line on this one.

When Fred Rogers died a bright light went out in this world. Never was there ever a whisper of inappropriate behavior on Mr. Rogers' part. What a shitty thing to say.

DAMN!!

Countless people would deny this bullshit just because no has said by letter the exact opissite out of random to your face doesn't mean no one denies it.