20 Lessons Hollywood Can Learn from the 2012 Summer Movie Season
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20 Lessons Hollywood Can Learn from the 2012 Summer Movie Season

By Dustin Rowles | Seriously Random Lists | September 11, 2012 | Comments ()


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1. Hold the Avengers Until the END of the Summer, So Everything Else Doesn't Feel Like a Letdown

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2. Hollywood Should File an Restraining Order to Ensure that Johnny Depp and Tim Burton Are Kept at Least, 1,000 Feet Apart At All Times

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3. On the other hand, I would not object if Tim Burton replaced Helena Bonham Carter with Eva Green in all subsequent Tim Burton productions

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4. Stop Using Taylor Kitsch's Awful Acting As a Scapegoat for Terribly Written and Executed Movies

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5. Give Sacha Baron Cohen a Monthly Segment on The Daily Show So He Can Work on New Characters Before He Takes Another Stab at Feature Films

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6. Don't Wait Ten Years Between Installments in a Franchise; Better Yet, Wipe Our Memory of the Awful Second Movie Before You Make a Third

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7. Cast Maggie Smith as the Racist and/or Classist Villain In Your Next Superhero Movie

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8. If You're Going to Cast Chris Hemsworth in a Re-Imagined Fairy Tale, Next Time Call it Snow White and the Shirtless Huntsman

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9. Don't Make Movies that Make No F**king Sense and Then Try to Convince the Audience There Were Was Some Profound Secret Meaning Buried Beneath the Incoherence

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10. Audiences Have No Problem Believing Tom Cruise as a Vampire or an Action Hero Who Will Swing from the Tallest Building in the World, But Never Try to Convince Us that He's a Heterosexual Rock God

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11. Stop Letting Adam Sandler Make Movies with His Friends

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12. Don't Reduce Monumentally Important Historic Figures to Axe-Wielding Second-Rate Wachowski Characters

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13. Never Underestimate the Box Office Power of the Female Libido

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14. Don't Say "Reboot" When You Mean "Remake"

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15. Stop Letting Len Wiseman Touch Things

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16. Joseph Gordon-Levitt Is Amazing, But He's Still Not Ready to Carry His Own Summer Blockbuster

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17. Old People Should Be Visiting Other Countries, Not Blowing Them Up

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18. Jeremy Renner is Awesome, But Not Awesome Enough to Make You Forget About Matt Damon

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19. Two Wrongs Does Not Make a Right

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20. All Your Best Intentions, Your Best Ideas, Your Best Performances, and Your Best Screenplays Go Completely Out the Door When a Crazy Guy with a Gun Gets Involved

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But It's Appreciated When You Try and Make the Best of a Bad Situation

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