12 Actors Completely Capable of Scaring Little Children Without the Benefit of a Costume

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12 Actors Completely Capable of Scaring Little Children Without the Benefit of a Costume

By Dustin Rowles | Seriously Random Lists | October 31, 2012 | Comments ()


Crispin Glover


Mickey Rourke


Tilda Swinton


Sean Whalen


The Ginger Fassbeard


Eddie Redmayne


Willem Dafoe


Derek Mears


Jackie Earle Haley


Cillian Murphy


Tom Cruise


Julian Beck

Julian Beck 5.jpg

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Nathan Forester

    Jackie Earl Haley? What about the original Freddy?

  • sevenpm

    Christ, I wasn't ready for the ginger fassbeard. Or Eddie Redmayne,

  • NynjaSquirrel

    Interesting post, but surely if you're judging these people on the physical attributes they have been given, why not go for:

  • Shonda

    Mickey Rourke looks like Zippy the Pinhead. And godDAMN, those are some Manson lamps on Cillian.

  • duckandcover

    Merciful Jesus, this post.

  • prince_of_montagu

    I humbly submit the suggestion of the new & improved Nikki Cox.

  • Rooks

    Fairuza Balk? (Only if she, ah, smiles...)

    Klaus Kinski, maybe?

    I'll be over here in the corner, then, all alone, hugging my knees, rocking back and forth.


    Come on, he looks like a praying mantis!

  • prince_of_montagu

    AGREED. I know some of the Pajeebs love him, but damn, i'm sure he has some lineage from a little kid's nightmares.

    Seems like a cool dude though.

  • Jezzer

    SWINTON is not scary. SWINTON is sublime. How DARE you, sir?


  • e jerry powell

    Take it back, Rowles; it is impossible to feel anything but love, awe, and happiness when gazing upon Tilda Swinton. To gaze upon Swinton is to see the origin of all in the universe.

  • HMDK

    Holy fuck, even Innsmouth inbreds would throw Eddie Redmayne back in the water.

  • PDamian

    Eddie Redmayne, scary? Seriously? That soft-mouthed boy couldn't put fear in a hamster with severe anxiety disorder.

    Crispin Glover, on the other hand ... I'm still not over the high kick he aimed at Letterman's head, back in the 1980s. And Christopher Walker should have been on this list. Christopher Walker should have been this list.

  • TherecanbeonlyoneAdmin

    How the fuck is there no Busey on this list? It's like you don't even think face-eating is traumatizing!

  • John G.

    JESUS CHRIST! you have found the epicenter of my fear-brain, and it is the evil preacher Kane. I had forgotten I even saw Poltergeist II when I was a kid, and you've brought it all back to me.


  • DeltaJuliet

    Oh yes, I remember that movie all too well.....that preacher is still, to me, one of the creepiest horror movie characters ever.

  • Louise

    Tom Noonan!!

  • nini

    no! eddie and cilian are not creepy scary, they're more creepy sexy.. i would gladly sell my soul to the devil for either one of them, specially eddie..mmm..

  • HMDK

    You weird fishfucker, you...

  • Belkwinith


  • zeke_the_pig

    Turning Dafoe's face towards the sky and tickling him is our last ditch defence system against an apocalyptic asteroid.

  • thenchonto

    But... who gets the job of tickling Dafoe? Just thinking about it makes me want to go cry in a corner. Are we going with inmate volunteers? A crack team of action heroes? Geology interns?

  • nini

    i think the only solution is to send a misfit team of oil drillers for the job! preferably while super dramatic aerosmith song is playing in the background..

    and folks, we have to be prepared for some losses.

  • Forget the children, Cillian Murphy just gave me a heart attack.

  • $27019454

    I sure wish Cillian Murphy would give me something...

  • Ty

    Sean Whalen should be on "It's Always Sunny" as the third McPoyle brother.

  • randomhookup

    Wallace Shawn and the late Vincent Schiavelli.

  • bleujayone

    No love for Michael Berryman? The man has made a career of taking his disability and turning it into an advantage. Won't someone think of Pluto?

  • TheOtherOne

    What about Vincent Schiavelli, Gary Busey or Nick Nolte?

    I'd also add most Reality TV stars (T.L.C, A.E. & E)...

    Example: Khloe Kardashian. Shudders...

  • Baba O'R'lyeh

    Doug Hutchison is on his way to snake into your house and use your liver to replenish himself for a few decades.

  • VonnegutSlut

    But only after he, ahem, "replenishes himself" on his real life child bride. Creepy fuck.

  • Pants-are-a-must

    Christopher Walken? Surely, between all the crazy smiles and the eerily beautiful, Walken should've had his day. Disappointed in you, Dustin.

  • prince_of_montagu

    I thought Walken and Dafoe were the reason this list was made.

  • Natallica

    There's in fact a Simpsons episode where he reads "Goodnight moon" to a bunch of kids and they cower in terror

  • "Good night moon. Good night MOON? Good night COW jumping OVER the MOON." IT IS GLORIOUS!


  • zeke_the_pig

    I remember that, and I just cowered in terror in recollection

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    I have to agree. The Walken is clearly able to terrify a child.

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