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Reddit Asks The Question: 'Parents Of Reddit, What Is The Most Expensive Thing Your Child Has Accidentally Ruined? '

By Petr Knava | reddit | September 15, 2017 | Comments ()

By Petr Knava | reddit | September 15, 2017 |


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I don’t have any kids. Up until recently the thought had never crossed my mind that I might ever want any either. Now, after reading what happened when Reddit asked the question ‘Parents Of Reddit, What Is The Most Expensive Thing Your Child Has Accidentally Ruined?’ I think I’m heading back towards my earlier state of mind.

The full thread is here, but below are some ‘higlights’ *shudder*:

sugarcunts

When I was a kid, my mother lost her diamond wedding ring. She was devastated. A decade later, while cleaning things up for a garage sale, we found it jammed in the toilet of my Barbie house.

virtually_toothless

The stereo in our minivan quit working. After a little troubleshooting, we found 25 pennies shoved in the CD slot.

Direwolf007

When I was about 4 or 5 I destroyed our upstairs and downstairs bathrooms. I had this little blue bath toy whale, and I had told my mom before that I wanted it to go to the ocean, so one night we were going out to dinner with my aunt and uncle. I go to the bathroom before leaving and put the sink stopper on and my little whale in the sink. When we come home we can hear running water the upstairs bathroom floor which was the downstairs bathroom ceiling had collapsed and there was a waterfall coming from upstairs.

ryan_503

My brother ripped earrings out of both my mother’s ears when he was a baby. He did one, then the other a few days later. I guess the cosmetic surgery to fix it was expensive and insurance didn’t cover it. Don’t wear big earrings when you’re holding a baby, ladies.

almaklages

My Son watched me windex the windows one day while cleaning. When I put the spray bottle down he picked it up and soaked two flat screen tv’s down.

It got sprayed so much some seeped in behind the screen and ran down the inside. 😕

They still work, but have funny vertical lines that are permanently distorted .

Gneissisnice

My sister destroyed not one, but two blenders by leaving a spoon in them before turning them on. The explosions were impressive.

Fangpyre

Not exactly ruined. I was on a Skype call introducing my dad to his new born granddaughter and she throws up all over the new MacBook Pro.

I cleaned it up and kept it off for a few days. I thought it was fried for sure but it turned on. Backlight was patchy and smelled funny for some time. Renamed it to Mac n Cheese. Surprisingly still works 7 years later.

The_Rowan

20 years ago my friend’s young son was making puzzles and he cut up his father’s original Star Wars a New Hope 1977 poster. His father told me he had to shrug it off because his son didn’t know any better. Best punishment served cold - the son is now a young Star Wars fan and he would do anything to own that poster he himself ruined.

Euthy

My eye.

When she was six months old, she was sitting in my lap playing with some toy. She suddenly got really excited and flailed her arms up. Her fingernail dug deep into my eye.

Three surgeries later, I still can barely see out of that eye, and it’s visibly screwed up too (not egregiously, but if you look me in the eye my pupil is clearly more oval than circle).

And needless to say, I won’t be telling her about this until she’s an adult at the earliest, and even then only if she asks.

Cathyg_99

We had a 90g salt water tank with easily upwards of $3k worth of coral, fish… I went to work a night shift and my son unplugged everything for the night my husband didn’t notice

Everything was dead in the morning, and the house smelled lovely

QueenSkunky

My grandpa was in the navy and when he took his youngest son (my uncle) onto a ship for a tour, my uncle wandered away for a little bit. They found him dropping Whoppers (the candy, not the burger) into whatever openings he could find. Supposedly, despite the crew working tirelessly to find them all, they’d still hear whoppers rolling around for years to come.

well_uh_yeah

My dad, a realtor, once sold a house and a condo to a guy whose daughter had burned down their old house. The house was for the family, the condo was for the daughter. I asked my dad how it had happened and he said the guy just told him, “She’s always been like that.”

ThMickXXL

I was washing my van one day 3 years ago and my two year old decided to help wash the other side…..with rocks. Scratched right down to the primer.

spyro_96

Not a parent, I’m the sister of this kid. My younger brother (he’s 11 years younger than me), When he was 2, he shoved an entire jam sandwich into a PlayStation 3. When we went to get it repaired, they found a key, 12p in change, the jam sandwich and a cheese string wrapper. He also threw a metal plane at our brand new 50” TV. It had a small hole in it for the 7 years it lasted us.

Little monsters kids are.

jmemequeen

Not a parent but I was on a cruise ship and they have art auctions with free champagne so lots of people just go for the drinks. Anyways this feral family came in all loud and let their kids run free, only one of their kids had crayons and drew on a $15,000 painting.

Internetallstar

I gave him a older car that still ran and was usable and he sold it…and bought a car that was even older and didn’t run because he wanted a Mustang.

squidkiosk

Must post this for my dad. Right after I got my drivers licence I was backing the car out of the garage and ran over half of the push lawnmower. I didn’t want to lose my newly acquired freedom, and this being January, I just turned the lawnmower around to show the “good side” and went about my life.

Cut to April. I’m doing my homework and my dad comes upstairs laughing

“Hey sweetie?”

“Yeah dad?”

“When did you run over the lawnmower.”

“…January “

Que mad laughter from my dad. He gave me a pass on it for my craftiness

CasusBellyBell

My vagina.

——-

Petr Knava lives in London and plays music




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