The Daily Trade Round-Up / Dustin Rowles
We’ve got all sorts of excitement lined up for you today — it is the daily trade round-up, after all — where we “dish” all the exciting new projects funneling through the pipeline like sewage into the ocean.
First up is a project that’s near and dear to my heart — so I know it must be to yours (I’m seriously trying to channel my best “Entertainment Tonight” shtick here and failing miserably). It’s called Frog King, and it’s adapted from one of my favorite novels from the past several years, written by Adam Davies, loosely based on his days as a book editor at Random House. It concerns Harry, a low-level hater of his job in publishing. The movie follows our hero as he putzes around at Starbucks, philanders with an older lady, and acts like a giant ass to his girlfriend, Evie — who kind of rocks — while attempting to sign a successful author and make his name in the biz. And here’s where some of you might actually entertain an interest in the project: Harry will be played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who is slowly making his way up the nonexistent Pajiba* It* list, after turns in Mysterious Skin, Brick, and even the somewhat disappointing The Lookout. Want more? The novel is being adapted by Brett Easton Ellis, author of American Psycho and all-around good guy, if you’re into Gen-X nihilism. No word on who will play Evie, but our short list includes Amy Adams and Natalie Portman, though we wish there were a young Lily Taylor in Hollywood today. On a sadder note, Darren Star — who made his name as creator of “Beverly Hills 90210,” “Sex and the City,” and “Melrose Place” — will make his big-screen debut behind the camera. I’m so giddy the film is being made at all that I’m willing to let that decision slide.
And yes, yes — the much loved Crank was left off our Best Action Films of All Time list, though Transporter did merit a few votes. But for Statham fans, there is still reason to rejoice. Kind of. The writing/directing duo behind Crank have indicated that they are working on another installment of the film — and no, it won’t be a prequel. It will apparently pick up where the original Crank left off, which is going to take a ridiculous twist of logic, physics, and human mortality to involve Statham — maybe his character has Jason Voorhees’ genetics, which is kind of cool, cause I’d like to see what kind of damage Statham can do in space. If he doesn’t appear in the sequel, don’t worry — he’s lined up to star in The Brazilian Job, a sequel to the absurdly mediocre The Italian Job, as well as The Bank Job based on the a real-life London heist that “netted Ocean’s 11 money with no arrest and not one penny recovered. That, in addition to his previously discussed role in Death Race, suggests that Statham will be coming to a theater near you very soon.
Blockbuster-director Michael Mann is also working on a new project, a film noir about a Hollywood murder investigation. It will be a period piece, set in the 1930s, about a studio’s private dick, played by the sizzling hot Leonardo DiCaprio, hired to investigate the murder of a young starlet’s husband (damn it, I can’t get a hang of the Mary Hart-speak). The prolific John Logan (The Aviator, Any Given Sunday, Gladiator) wrote the script, which includes a dazzling Bugsy Siegel shootout and will be filmed with the MGM studio lot as the backdrop. Let’s just hope it’s better than Mann’s last project, the critical and box-office disaster, Miami Vice, which couldn’t have been worse if Don Johnson and Phillip Michael Thomas had starred along with the Weekend at Bernie’s corpse.
Controversial Hollywood actor and director Mel Gibson is now on the record stating that there won’t be anymore Lethal Weapon or Mad Max sequels (at least not with him), but he has basically confirmed that there will be a sequel to Maverick and that both he and, quite possibly, James Garner will return. I hate to wish it upon you, James, but it might be a good time to check out, old pal. I don’t know if you’ve seen any of Gibson’s films lately, but they are freakin’ ghastly — two-hour excuses to cut off heads, flay Jesus, and release some of that pent up anti-Semitic repression. He’s not a guy I’d want to spend any time with in an old Western barbershop, if you get where I’m going — those straight razors are nasty. Take it from us, Jimmy — this is a project you’re going to want to pass on.
That should be enough to keep you industry news hounds at bay, at least until later this afternoon when the review for the much-anticipated Spider-Man 3goes up. We’re so excited about the Tobey Maguire saga around the offices, we’ve been leaving sexually harassing voice mails on each others’ phones! We’ve also got a review going up this weekend for Lucky You, the feature starring the sexy, sculpted Eric Bana and Tom Green’s cuddly ex-wife, Drew Barrymore.
I’ll leave you with a sneak peak of this summer’s surefire sensation, Balls of Fury starring Christopher Walken and that fat guy (Dan Fogler) nobody has ever heard of. It looks like a pic written with Will Ferrell in mind, but one that not even he would deign to star in. Unfortunately, Walken will take any role that comes his way as long as it comes with a couple of hundred dollar bills. Indeed, not even the shitty hair-band music in the trailer can get us pumped for it.
Dustin Rowles is the publisher of Pajiba. He lives with his wife in Ithaca, New York. You may email him, or leave a comment below.
Comments
Hmmmm, the Italian Job, I like all the cast but there was something WAY off in that film( I mean, aside from being a completely unnecessary remake) . The only convincing character was Norton's and I've read he didn't even want to be there. As for Oceans...err the Brazilian Job, it will suck harder then Seacrest on a gays cruise).
Gibson's latest lunacy? Oh boy, Mr. Garner, you don't need to do this sir.
And finally, Crank continues? bring it on baybee Jason's da'man for this type of flick.
Posted by: BarbadoSlim at May 4, 2007 10:18 AM
The writing/directing duo behind Crank have indicated that they are working on ...
Fifucknally. That is one welcome update, guys. I've been checking IMdB religiously for months to see what/when those two droogs would be up to next--frankly I don't care what they do, so long as it's action. Because I for one don't want to see that kind of talent go to waste.
Posted by: Ranylt at May 4, 2007 10:35 AM
So, is Christopher Walken supposed to be Chinese in that film? Cause I kind of don't buy that casting.
And, I'm not a fan of Dan Fogler. I thought he was insufferable in The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee and didn't deserve his Tony Award in Featured Actor, but he's far more talented than this dreck.
Sadly enough, if the film featured Angela Bettis, Bette Middler, Christian Bale, Ed Norton, Kathy Bates, or Patricia Clarkson, I would be first in line.
When will I ever learn.
Posted by: Robert at May 4, 2007 11:18 AM
Am I the only one who thinks "The Brazillian Job" sounds like a cheap porn?
Posted by: Claire at May 4, 2007 11:58 AM
Charlie Murphy! Charlie Murphy! Charlie Murphy!
Way to kill all that remaining Chapelle Show love Mr. Murphy.
That movie looks awful
Posted by: Brian at May 4, 2007 11:59 AM
SO excited for The Frog King. And I think that Joseph Gordon-Levitt is perfect, even though it's not how I pictured Harry (I think I was influenced by Davies' picture on the back of the book) I trust G-L to make Harry as likeable/unlikeable as he was in the book, instead of turning it into what could be straight romantic comedy fare.
For Evie? Maggie Gyllenhaal comes to mind. Or some unknown who has a nice sarcastic side and can talk fast. And who is extremely thin.
And if they change the end to make it more palatable I will be v. upset.
Posted by: Kathryn at May 4, 2007 12:00 PM
Robert, I must have gotten a concussion and changed my name but otherwise my opinions stay the same. Glad to find out the important things remain. We do not need to learn anything else. If the film features one of the annointed that you listed, at least we get a remarkable performance despite the calibre of the picture. Robert or Rudy, just do not call either one of us Bob.
Posted by: rudy at May 4, 2007 12:02 PM
However bad Balls of Fury may look, just remember that trailers usually showcase the funniest parts of the movie.
Yeah. Those two minutes of suck are the highlights among 88 more minutes of suck^2.
Posted by: Mentalepsy at May 4, 2007 12:25 PM
I read that Danny Boyle has confirmed that all of the original actors from Trainspotting have signed on for the sequel, Porno.
Is this merely an unverifiable rumor? I've been waiting to see if Pajiba would bring this up, but, alas, I can wait no longer.
Posted by: missmle at May 4, 2007 12:28 PM
Dude! Apocalypto was really good! Not a cinematic masterpiece or anything, but still a thoroughly engaging and well-made chase movie with a novel choice of setting.
Posted by: Gordon at May 4, 2007 12:32 PM
In response to Robert:
Fogler was a hell of a lot better than anyone else up for the award. He fit his role perfectly, annoying though it could be (the character was supposed to be an obnoxious kid), as opposed to the talented but miscast Matthew Morrison in "The Light in the Piazza" or Hank Azaria's Will Ferrel-with-less-yelling interpretation of Sir Lancelot in "Monty Python's Spamalot".
Posted by: Kevin at May 4, 2007 12:39 PM
I heart Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Dustin, Darren Star was also behind Grosse Pointe, so the movie might not be that bad. Furthermore, The Italian Job was good. I've seen it at least five times. Though I'm not that jazzed about The Brazilian Job: it sounds dirty.
Posted by: Bianca Reagan at May 4, 2007 12:40 PM
Lucky You: Indeed.
I was thinking of campainging for Pajiba to boycott that movie, because it's looks SO deadfully horrifying... I would not want to inflict that kind of sadistic torture upon you guys. It's just not worth it, man! You have too much to live for!
Posted by: litelysalted at May 4, 2007 3:36 PM
Slaps head.
Look at me, out of commission for a week and I can barely get my shit together to type a coherent sentence.
Posted by: litelysalted at May 4, 2007 3:38 PM
The Brazillian Job is really what happens every 6 weeks when I visit my waxer
Posted by: Pinky at May 4, 2007 4:06 PM
Joseph Gordon-Levitt first made an impression on me in the Don Cheadle co-starred, and insanely intense, 'Manic'
if you liked him in 'Brick' he'll blow you away in 'Manic'.
I'm a little disappointed Pajiba hasn't referenced this more.
Posted by: CoolWhip at May 4, 2007 4:37 PM
A sequel to "Maverick." That's a joke, right? Mel Gibson's trying to be funny again, maybe, right?
Posted by: Stacy at May 4, 2007 4:38 PM
Maybe it was because it was my introduction to Jason Statham; maybe it was the mini Coopers; maybe it was the gratuitous Donald Sutherland...but I liked The Italian Job. It wasn't great, and I didn't pay full price for it (saw it on cable), but it was fun.
Posted by: Louise at May 4, 2007 4:41 PM
Nothing to comment on other than to thank Pajiba for that "Real Age" banner.....I took the test and I should be dead in ******
Posted by: Manny at May 4, 2007 5:05 PM
In Response to Kevin Responding to Me:
Agreed, Fogler was the best of a very poor selection of nominees, but I preferred many other performances that could have been nominated over him, including fellow Spelling Bee performers Jesse Tyler Ferguson (so I go from gimicky foot to gimicky special needs kid...) and Jay Reiss (ok, so he didn't sing or get out of his chair, but darn it if it wasn't a great performance). As for other shows, Cleavant Derricks was fantastic in Brooklyn, The Musical. Throw in Dan Fogler and Hank Azaria, and that would have been a strong line-up for Featured Actor.
I also don't agree with Sara Ramirez winning over Celia Keenan-Bolger, but that's another story entirely.
It wasn't exactly Broadway's proudest year...
Posted by: Robert at May 4, 2007 6:01 PM
you can't possibly care so little about 'sex and the city' as to sandwich it between that spelling crap.
Posted by: nicole at May 4, 2007 6:52 PM
I guess I'm in the minority here, but I thought Crank was some of the most god-awful crap I've ever had the misfortune of watching.
Posted by: bartap at May 4, 2007 7:10 PM
Statham was hands-down the best part (along with Norton) of Italian Job. Maybe I just love me some Handsome Rob.
Posted by: bonnie at May 4, 2007 8:45 PM
I loved The Frog King. I was directed to it by my ex-roommate, who met Adam Davies, who thought I should read it because I suffer from the same disease as the "rocking Evie."
I read about a book a week, and to read a book where the female character has the same disease as me (maybe the first one?), a disease that no one knows about, talks about, and certainly never reads about... well, Adam Davies became my hero.
Because of that, I jokingly always pictured Evie like me-- petite, thin, somewhat masculine, sometimes says the wrong thing, always goofy...
Based on a dinner I had last night, I would think Kristen Bell would be good for the role. Based on my husband's (Deus Ex Malcontent) assessment, it would be Kristen Stewart, Jena Malone, or Ellen Page.
(Chez adds.... soundtrack by Poe.)
Posted by: Jayne Pazienza at May 4, 2007 9:42 PM