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Why, As I Live and Breathe, Is That Liz Taylor Herself or a Puffy, Cracked Out Clone?

By Courtney Enlow | Pajiba Love | June 22, 2012 | Comments ()


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It must be like looking in a mirror for Liz. But, you know, like looking in a mirror right now.

Happy Friday, goodlies. Joanna and Dustin are busy baking up some tasty reviews (they've got raisins in them--you like raisins) so I'm helping out. This is my inaugural P. Love outing, so be gentle. Or don't. I can't make you; I'm not your mom.

I would like to apologize for my completely erroneous exclusion of My Girl in yesterday's tearjerker post. As penance, I offer you this joyous Tumblr post, so that you too might imagine Vada Sultenfuss speaking Amy Brookheimer's lines even more so than usual. Now if Season 2 of "Veep" could just include a lovelorn Amy singing along on her bed with "Wedding Bell Blues." (Tumblr)

Next month, Spare the Rock Records is releasing a charity album featuring songs with a scientific slant by female artists, designed to encourage science and engineering education among girls, who typically don't enter those fields. It's a cool project, and this Mates of State cover of Guided By Voices' "I Am A Scientist" is pretty great--and its video is adorable. (Paste)

Guys, I don't want to blow your minds here, but Lifetime may be wondering if Lindsay Lohan is worth the trouble. (Celebitchy)

"Game of Thrones" + Bridesmaids = my new favorite combination. Joffrey is SO that teen girl in the jewelry store. (Game of Bridesmaids)

What's Johnny Depp doing with his newly single life? Oh, not much, just hanging out with Marilyn Manson and allegedly having affairs with people I am pretty sure are out and proud lesbians. Dude, quit being lame and just get back with Winona already, gawld. (People)

I mean, look how well he dressed when he was with her! In a battle royale betwixt his current Nava-hobo and this Wealthy Land Tycoon Outsider Hell-Bent on Destroying Our Small Old West Town look, I pick the latter. I have glimpsed your single future, Johnny Depp, and all I can say is, go back.

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I want this Millennium Falcon messenger bag so bad, you guys. I need it to carry all my wares. And if I am lacking in wares, I will buy wares specifically for the purpose of using this bag to carry them. (Neatorama)

I'll wear it over my TARDIS bathrobe. (Think Geek)

So, sports happened last night, and fresh young upstart LeBron James has a ring now, as well as this pretty sweet Nike spot, released last night. (Hip Hop Wired)

See that, above? I talked about sports. That was smart of me, because a study sponsored by a laundry detergent company shows that's all men want me to talk about. Thanks for the hint, laundry. Now I best get back to doing you before I need to be put back in line. (Jane Dough)

This interview with Chris Hemsworth, replete with his adorable impression of his baby daughter, just made me re-pregnant. (Crushable)

Teach your child the alphabet the Wes Anderson way with this series of stellar Wes Anderson alphabet posters. (Flavorwire)

Longing for the glory of old Hollywood? Check out this excellent piece on the sad tale of Dorothy Dandrige and become wholly disillusioned. (The Hairpin)

Finally, this series of Gay Pride shorts, a collaboration between Google+ and Pride Toronto, is lovely. Happy Pride, New York! (Copyranter)



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Comments Are Welcome, Douches Are Not


  • Sarah P

    Being bisexual isn't the same as being an "out and proud lesbian." Not saying Amber Heard is in any way involved with Johnny Depp, just saying she's not actually a lesbian.

  • ,

    Jesus Mary and Joseph, what the fuck IS that ... thing standing in the background to Lohan's right? I can't tell if it's forward or backward. It appears to have no knees.

    How am I supposed to sleep with that image burned in my brain?

  • Rebecca Hachmyer

    Does Winona Ryder look eerily like Kristen Stewart in that pic or has Stewart's face on EVERY magazine this month broken my eyes??

  • kirbyjay

    Didn't know that the crackwhore was playing 70's fried chicken senator's wife Liz as well. Who's playing John Warner

  • $27019454

    Full disclosure: Zinfandel Alert.

    No mother ever has it all. What does that even mean? "Have it all"? Bullshit.

    I've been paid HUGE and I've been paid meh. NOTHING pays for me not being with my kids. There is NO free lunch for men or women. None. Mr. Klingonfree works huge hours and makes bank. I...used to. And after years of working myriad permutations of that equation...I guess I am OK with being professionally semi-fulfilled. I'm not big on regret in any case. My advice to this person is: Bloom where you are planted and take a look at the big picture before you bitch too loud. A family is a unit -- I think the individual is lesser than the unit, in the case of a family.

  • DominaNefret

    They accidentally put Matt Smith where Wes Anderson was supposed to be in that alphabet. I guess M is a W upside down, so it's kind of understandable.

    Amara Karan who starred in The Darjeeling Limited played Rita in The God Complex, which totally legitimizes The Doctor being part of the Wes Anderson lexicon.

  • Groundloop

    Johnny Depp can't ever change his style. He's a bought and paid for puppet of the Accessory/Industrial Complex.

  • bleujayone

    Somewhere out there, a Cossack by the name of Yuri is face down in the snow with the mother of all headaches wondering who the little girl he thinks is named "Zinaidi" really was, how in the hell she managed to drink him under the table and where on earth his Ushanka hat is. All his questions will be answered very shortly.

  • F'mal DeHyde

    I need to get out of my cave more often, I hadn't heard about Depp's breakup. Kinda feel bad for they guy, but I guess I better go read what happened in case he did something dastardly.

  • sevenpm

    http://www.amazon.com/Doctor-W... Just purchased this fine mug for my friend's birthday. THEN YOU SHOW ME THIS ROBE. Great. Just great.

  • laylaness

    Okay, guys, how many of you are going to use the "bigger on the inside" joke when you try to lure the ladies into your TARDIS robe?

  • Guest

    ...designed to encourage science and engineering education among girls, who typically don’t enter those fields. It’s a cool project...

    For a moment (and because of where my eyes landed), I thought you were praising this thing in the news today, which I read moments before coming here.

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/yourcom...

    I am very glad you didn't.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    whoa. That's amazingly terrible. But reminds me of when my (non-make up wearing, anti-fashionista) sister interned at L'Oreal during college. She was getting a chemistry degree. At one point she commented that she'd like to do something worthwhile with her chemistry degree, and she had the male intern coordinator looked so crushed. "But...we make people happy! and feel good about themselves! that's important."

  • Sara_Tonin00

    I'm doing a callback to yesterday's Atlantic article, which has gotten awesomesauce levels of internet coverage (the most visited in The Atlantic's history) Someone posted this on the NY Times article about the story, and it explains my thoughts on the matter practically perfectly (Just an excerpt):

    To my view, Ms. Slaughter has it all now, and did before moving to Washington. She (and I) are both lucky enough to have an interesting, full-time, profession which she enjoys, and a family, including a wonderful supportive husband. Where we disagree is the expectation that she could commute, only see her kids on weekends but still feel satisfied. When did feminism say you could be a long-distance parent?

    Ms. Slaughter had it all but had the opportunity to do something extraordinary, so sacrificed family for 2 years in service to our country. Just as a member of the armed service has to sacrifice family while deployed, so did Ms. Slaughter. To exaggerate, an astronaut can't be a good parent while away but I doubt we would use that example as a slam on feminist expectations and feminism itself.

    I think a meaningful yardstick is to compare the work/life balance of women and men in similar, 80+ hr/wk high-pressure jobs, especially out of town. There is none, for either gender. Why would women expect something which has never been available to our male colleagues?

  • Guest

    thanks for the heads up. interesting essay, and a remarkable response.

  • She also lost me when she said she quit Washington to return home because her tenure at Princeton would terminate if she was gone for more than 2 years. Tenure = job for life; so I think she glossed over that bit. Now she gets to lecture at Princeton AND go to conferences and give speeches and be an all round power player - albeit one hamstrung by the shackles of being a mother, denied the right to the career path she wanted even though she also admits she could have worked fewer days in Washington AND been given a secure computer connection so she could work from home. But that wasn't enough, I mean really, I'd still have to work FOUR days in Washington? Damn you Evil Patriachy!!!

  • DarthCorleone

    I want that bathrobe.

  • Quorren

    I know Lindsay has a lot of things to deal with right now, like getting into car accidents and trying to die before she's 30, but girl needs to get better support for her girls. This is the upteenth photo I've seen of her where it looks like her fun bags are trying to slide down her body out of embarrassment.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Put that on the costume department then. Especially since she's playing Liz Taylor, who had those aeronautic bras.

  • katy

    Big 'no' to Winona. That chick is crazy pants, and not in the good way. There is nothing worse than a newly single, post long term relationship person who jumps to the crazy. Let's hope Marilyn Manson is as nuts as it gets.

  • e jerry powell

    I'm going with puffy, cracked-out clone. As it that weren't a foregone conclusion.

  • melissa82

    Thanks for the Better Off Dead quote. And I really do like raisins...just not when they slide (crawl?) away from me.

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Ha! My mom grew up in the East 60s of NYC and said they would never eat rum raisin ice cream for that reason.

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