What If, And I'm Just Spitballing Here, But What If Prometheus Just Didn't Make Any F---ing Sense?
It's typically against my religion to link to HuffPo unless it's a Mike Ryan piece (because I know he gets paid), but Reba passed this fun slideshow along inspired by news that the Guinness Book of World Record's movie being developed: 10 More Reference Books that Should Be Adapted into Movies (Baby Goose alert!). (HuffPo)
What happens one one woman tries to raise funds to advocate for better female representation in video games? She's bullied with rape threats from scores of misogynistic assholes. YOU SUCK INTERNET. I don't even like video games and I chipped in $10 in support of the cause. (Thanks, Ranylt). (Kickstarter)
Here's a fun way to work out your anger: With 20 Awesome Television Bitch-Slap GIFs. (WarmingGlow)
Or you could take out your aggression on this King Joffrey practice target. (I09)
But hold up, before you go and cold-cock someone, maybe try acting like an adult. Of course, the problem with acting like an adult is that being an adult is full of mundane tasks that no one wants to do. (Hyperbole and a Half)
Then again, being an adult means being old enough to go see Django Unchained without a parent, which you're going to want to do after seeing the International trailer for Quentin Tarantino's latest featuring footage of Sam Jackson's slave. (FSR)
Also, the downside to not yet being an adult is that all your friends probably love Twilight. OMG NEW SPARKLY IMAGES OF THE VAMPIRE BABY. (FilmDrunk)
I guess this Joe Manganiello guy is a thing now, huh? I liked him better when he was called Eric Bana. (Celebitchy)
Also, dude: Converse All-Stars are not the appropriate footwear when lifting tires.
The world's longest burp? 18 seconds. You can watch history in the making. (Neatorama)
More Prometheus. CAN YOU HANDLE MORE PROMETHEUS? Here's 18 Frustrating Moments from Prometheus, although I don't understand why this much print is not devoted to other ambitious sci-fi films that fall short. (Unreality)
This is the last Prometheus post, because this one is my favorite, because of all the theories floating around the Internet that seem to afford way too much credit to the filmmakers' intentions, this one is the best because it does the opposite: What if, and I'm just throwing it out there, what if Prometheus just doesn't make any fucking sense? (Dave Chen)
Remember how they're going to have to do around 7 weeks of reshoots on Brad Pitt's World War Z and then Damon Lindelof was been brought in to rewrite the third act? I wonder what happened there? (Slashfilm)
I have a very, very vague understanding of what Fifty Shades of Grey is, and most of that understanding comes from the "SNL" short in which it appears that the book is basically bunk material for ladies, which made it awkward to stand next to a pregnant woman reading it at the gym the other day because now that's the only think I'm thinking: This woman on the treadmill next to me would rather be at home rubbing her cooter. Anyway, everyone is casting the damn movie, and Buzzsugar just said screw it: Here's 22 Women that could play the lead, or ALL the age appropriate women in Hollywood. (BuzzSugar)
The First Man Ever to Decorate His Home with Hunting Trophies Tries to Sell His Wife on the Idea: A Dramatic Monologue. Oh, Snider: It's like the prose version of some strange New Yorker Cartoon. (Snide Remarks)
Here's a series of GIFs celebrating the relationship between the 10th Doctor and Rose to give you that weepy boost to your Wednesday. You're welcome. (Geek Girl Diva)
Someone asked Meryl Streep if there would be a Devil Wears Prada 2 and her answer reminds us all of why Meryl Streep is such A FUCKING DELIGHT. (Buzzfeed)
The guy who sang "Chocolate Rain" attempts to extend his 15 minutes by covering "Call Me Maybe," and you know what? Let's do it. Here's another five minutes. Use the the YouTube earnings to have that third testicle removed, dude.