Pajiba

Oh man, so much in today's P-Love is setting me off.

Leo, NO! Blake Lively is not a star, no mater how hard Karl Lagerfeld, Anna Wintour, et al. are trying to push her on us. She was absolutely terrible in The Town. Make her stop. She is the epitome of trying too hard.

And I hadn't heard this Robert Pattinson as Jeff Buckley business before, but it is making feel very STABBY.

I think part of the problem behind yet another "Rapture" scare is that they need to update its marketing for the 21st Century mentality.

Change from;

"The End is Neigh
Ye All Need to Repent
Prepare for God's Judgement"

To

"The Reboot is Neigh
Ye All Need To Back Up
User Control Alt Delete"

Of course the drawback is that when you reboot, often it appears nothing has actually changed, and to the itself computer nothing has. It just takes up where it last left off. So when we wake up the next day we may actually be Earth 5.2, but really who could prove it?

You still suck at making these lists I see. Don't worry - you'll get the hang of it some day.

Ana Catarian Bezerra, Brazilian Woman, Legally Entitled To Masturbate At Work (VIDEO)

Either the most idiotic or the most brilliant headline ever.

Damn, Roseanne got some steel-ovaries!

Sigh. For years and years and years I've been dreaming of the day when Leo would realize that we were meant for each other ... no, wait. For years I have been refusing to watch any movie in which Leonardo DiCaprio does not die (okay, except Inception, which is awesome), because he is annoying and unattractive. Seriously, the Quick and the Dead, in which Russell Crowe is hot and Leo dies (spoiler, sorry) is like the greatest movie of all time.

Despair? No way, man. We can now leave our houses without fear. Thanks for showing us the light, JRob!

The rapture is moo
I'm a little surprised I haven't seen this in a Chik-Fil-A commercial yet.

If, um, “steaming his latte” at work would help my barista make some of these badass foam creations, who am I to say nay?
I'd suggest you take a second to think of the implication of what may be going into your latte.

Psychology Today, according to my Phsych 101 teacher, is pretty much The Enquirer (Inquirer?) for psychology.

She's a multi-tasker?

I remember hearing somewhere (here maybe?) that Pattinson actually doesn't like acting all that much and would much rather use his fame to become a musician.

I'm assuming R-Patz singing and the story about the Brazilian woman aren't unrelated.

AND FINALLY, that piano and cello piece is lovely. I like it A LOT.

And also, Divine Backpack is my new band name.

So, was Leo in Vegas on April 1st?

I would like to formally acknowledge a distinct lack of Superasente, Tracer Bullet and PaddyDog of late. Rykker has been AWOL for months. What is up with that? Even Kballs is a shadow of his former self. LindsEy and Lainey made off with them didn't they? Even as I type they are braiding each other's hair and plotting.

My charms are indeed hard to resist, but I assure you I have NONE of them locked in my basement. Anymore.

Wow. I need to get me a fancy electric cello. Those are awesome.

So, Blake's got game (BOOBS!!!), Ryan Gosling, now Leonardo Dicaprio...
Boobalistic Mcmumble will NOT be stopped, bitches.
Seriously, professional girlfriend seems to be a good career move for blake since she can't act to save her life(breast can't act). I so totally approve Blake and Leo = Bleo? (Ha!)

Looks like SOMEbody is going to contract a bizarre illness House can't figure out.

Watching Cuddy strip, I don't know how he still doesn't believe in Jehovah.

That HeroBuilder site was a trip, what the heck does your grandkid who won't pass the drowning test have to do with the actual Seals? Oh, and to suggest that the doll should've be made in the likeness of one of the 6ers just proves how getting your own umbilical cord wrapped around your neck has devastating effects of cognitive function. No, they should do it, this isn't a celebrity-obsessed culture, fanactics of any sort will surely them alone, right? Foolishness. Hm, how does one prove that he is a racist? I know, how about bloviating into the wind about how cowardly it was for someone to give you exactly what you have wanted for lo, these ten years. Was he supposed to stealth his way into Pakistan, brave the Zoo Of Death and the Porn Sluice and carry out the deed himself--all the while capping the BP leak with his own teeth? Even your rentboy Captain Kanye-Smash is on board with what played out, and still Old Black Joe displeases you? So, how would you have orchestrated this, Coeur de Lion? All of that righteous fury, well, you certainly channeled it into something more productive than nothing, and had more meaningful relationships to this immediate issue than being nominally related to someone who is no way germane to this specific issue? Of course they would deign to call it an action figure, what would they know about action? Clearly not much, as they seem to have this idea that Seals wander about the deserts with no special orders but a mandate that amounts to 'Git 'em'. Kids, that was the oprechniki and nobody misses them. No wait, I meant, kids, that was the foresters and nobody misses them. I'm sure those are the only two examples in history. You're never going to agree with everything that your leader does, but how how do justify your contrary and reactionary response to the execution (ha!) of one of your own expressed desires? If you're not in league with the cross burners, the only conclusion is this: You, children, are crackheads.