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This Is The Closest We'll Ever Get To "Jon's Hamm"

By | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (22)



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Hiya, Eloquents! Just a heads up, but I’m flying down to San Francisco for the weekend to take part in The Folsom Fair, which means the lovely and talented Agent Bedhead will be covering for me. Any San Fransisco Pajibans out there that I should know of?

At this point, I think we all of us (even the straight men) would bang the living hell out of Jon Hamm. Well good news! It turns out he also did porn. I mean granted, he worked as a set dresser (which is a very important part of the shoot, let no one tell you otherwise), but shut up, it still counts! (popbytes)

Bad news you guys: Eddie Fisher died Wednesday night due to complications from hip surgery. Pour a little out on the curb for one of the world’s first true rock stars and the father of Princess Leia. (Dlisted)

You thought your first day on the job sucked? Well, compare yours to Allie Brosh’s which involved a wacky misunderstanding and a screaming gypsy woman and be glad that your job didn’t suck as badly as hers. (The Gloss)

Chris Noth is throwing a whiny little bitchfit by blaming the press for killing the Sex and the City franchise. Actually, I thought what killed it was terrible writing and an overload of consumerism, but if we had any part of putting a stake through its heart, we’ve done our job. (Celebitchy)

There’s a Madonna quiz over at Litely Salted right now, and I managed to score a whopping 44% on it. Yeah, it’s official: I’m like the worst gay ever. Please don’t revoke my homo card. (Litely Salted) And for you super hard-core Super Mario fans, here’s a Super Mario Bros. quiz. (LitelySalted)

Here’s the A.V. Club talking about aspects of pop culture that, despite their best efforts to avoid them, they’ve been sucked into. Alright, mini-div: Any part of pop culture you’ve been dragged into kicking and screaming? Bonus points if I caused it! (A.V. Club)

For those of you wondering, Lady Gaga’s meat dress is being turned into jerky. I’m sure if you sift around in there long enough, you’ll find a pretty apt metaphor for Lady Gaga’s career, but really I just want her to go eat a dick. (Agent Bedhead)

It’s official people: We have discovered the Indian version of Michael Bay. Don’t believe me? Well check out this trailer with ROBOT TIGERS on LIGHTNING LEASHES with a GIANT SNAKE MADE OF ROBOTS OH MY GOD EXPLOOOOOOOOOOSIONS! (Film Drunk)

Courtesy of Sofia, here’s a bunch of funny stuff that people have written on bathroom stall walls. I was going to type “funny shit” up there instead, but then I realized that putting “shit” and “bathroom” in the same sentence might be a bit misleading. (Chillout Point)

So as it turns out, the original opening for Iron Man 2 involved having Tony Stark face down puking in a toilet. Oh, we’ve all been there, haven’t we? You go to a Halloween party and next thing you know you wake up in a bathroom puking peach schnapps, dressed as a cowboy while the host’s dog bites your hand. Good times. (Gamma Squad)

Bret Michaels is set to undergo surgery to repair a hole in his heart, which comes after having a near fatal brain hemorrhage. Yipes, it might be time for the man to start taking it easy. I think his body might be held together by scotch tape and paper clips at this point. (Warming Glow)

Oh goodie, Snooki is putting together an album because of fucking course she is. I swear to God, if she does a cover of “We Represent The Lollipop Guild,” I will crap bricks. (Celebslam)

I know you guys hated those American Apparel ads more than you’ve ever hated anything in your entire life, so just to mess with your heads, here’s some sex advice from AA employees. Why do I feel like sex with them boils down to “look really bored the whole time and say how over this you are”? (The Nerve)

Anyway, before I leave you guys until Tuesday, here’s one last puppy-induced moment of zen for you guys. Happy weekend!

Jeremy Feist is a freelance writer, maker of lovin’, and an average-everyday-sane-psycho. You can check his NSFW blog here, or email him here.









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Comments

I thought it was interesting that the drunk party scene in "Iron Man 2" was the most tense to me. That's not to disparage the rest of the movie, but I enjoyed the realistic "Ohhhhhhhhhh shit" fear of watching someone who's lost it in a crowd of people with lots and lots of breakable things about.

Posted by: Jay at September 24, 2010 12:14 PM

I'll be at Folsom. WHOO HOO.

Posted by: kate the great at September 24, 2010 12:20 PM

That video is fabulous; you just made my day.

Posted by: Edith at September 24, 2010 12:59 PM

Bret Michaels is set to undergo surgery to repair a hole in his heart, which comes after having a near fatal brain hemorrhage.

I thought the 80's taught us that the hole in my heart can only be filled by you.

Posted by: twig at September 24, 2010 1:19 PM

That is some of the most terrible, disastrous dating advice I have ever heard. I'm sure it was all tongue-in-cheek but really...if you still think letting people take nude pictures of you is perfectly safe if you aren't Rihanna, you must be living under a rock.

Posted by: slip at September 24, 2010 1:19 PM

HAMM.

He is mine. And oh Jeremy, you just became my absolute favorite in life for posting that photo.

Gah, he makes me turn in to a 12 year old girl. I AM GROPING THE COMPUTER SCREEN FOR REALS SOMEBODY HELP MEEEEE!

Posted by: figgy at September 24, 2010 1:19 PM

That puppy and German Shepherd video was adorable and convinced me that my dog, Wallace, MUST be a beagle/German Shepherd mix. Just look at him! Wallace!

And I got 62% on the Madonna quiz. Not bad for a straight woman that doesn't like her all that much!

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at September 24, 2010 1:24 PM

the hole in my heart can only be filled by you.

I don't even know if Mr. Feist knew he was setting you up, but I was waiting.

Posted by: Jay at September 24, 2010 1:42 PM

jon hamm talked about his porn job on letterman, october 9th of last year. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_EjppUO-mI
he starts talking about it at the 3 minute mark.

Posted by: daisyankh at September 24, 2010 1:53 PM

Stupid Monopoly quiz with your tricky wording and new versions I've never ever heard of! ARRRGH!

Posted by: PaulterA at September 24, 2010 2:11 PM

And when and why did they feel the need to change property names on me?!?!

Posted by: PaulterA at September 24, 2010 2:14 PM

Unthrilled to find that one of those toilet-stall composers is a Vonnegut plagiarizer. Is there no honesty in the world of graffitiosos?

Posted by: tofupuppy at September 24, 2010 2:48 PM

Boy, the restaurant lady in that story was a giant bitch. I've worked for some bitches before (like seriously, unbelievable major league assholes), but none of them actually screamed at me.

And not surprised that she didn't apologize, very often, when supervisors make mistakes, they refuse to even acknowledge a mistake was made on their part, much less apologize, so get used to that shit, people who have just entered or will soon enter the workforce.

Posted by: Slash at September 24, 2010 3:41 PM

Aw, we could've grabbed a drink this weekend had I known, Jeremy. Have fun at the Fair and don't do anything I...oh wait.

Posted by: JapJay at September 24, 2010 4:24 PM

I got 68% on the Madonna quiz, and I thought I was the worst gay man ever. Jeremy, you have some 'splaining to do.

Posted by: Craig at September 24, 2010 5:45 PM

6/25 in the Madonna quiz, whee! I know nothing about the woman, and that makes me happy.

Posted by: figgy at September 24, 2010 6:02 PM

My favorite bathroom comment stood alone amongst a huge scrawl of philosophy, poetry, and dirty jokes on a coffee shop's bathroom wall: "This bathroom is hell for the illiterate".

Posted by: Kris at September 24, 2010 7:20 PM

Uhm... I don't really know what to think...

Posted by: instantempo at November 19, 2010 10:44 AM

Some problems with the code of this page?

Posted by: forex signals at January 12, 2011 1:43 PM

Emma Stone and Eva Longoria had been knockouts final night. Not just the dresses, but every thing put together.

Posted by: Becky at January 17, 2011 12:34 PM

Uhm... I don't really know what to think... but I have a question I'd like to ask you in private, ideally by email. How can I reach you?

Posted by: forex trading signals at January 17, 2011 4:10 PM

Uhm... I don't really know what to think... but I have a question I'd like to ask you in private, ideally by email. How can I reach you?

Posted by: forex trading system at January 19, 2011 7:35 AM