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Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow (In Moderation)

By | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (30)

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Hey everyone, sorry for yesterday. Unfortunately, Toronto got walloped with a nice little snow storm that downed my internet connection. So, you know, super awesome day. Anyway, onto the Love!

Good news, everyone! Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was finally repealed, just in time for Christmas! Thanks Santa! Anyway, here’s a quick question and answer piece about how this affects you. (Towleroad)

And as a present to you guys, here’s a clip from Black Swan featuring Natalie Portman having angry, lesbian, kinda-NSFWish ballerina sex. It’s the gift that keeps on giving, mostly because women can technically have an infinite amount of consecutive orgasms. (Film Drunk)

This was sent in by Lainey Bobainey, so you know it’s gonna make your heart swell: A blogger decided to send out $30 gift cards to twenty people who needed help for the holidays. The outpouring of generosity that followed it is nothing short of a damn internet Christmas miracle. Honestly, you need to see it for yourselves. (The Bloggess)

For those of you interested to find out, the results of the 2010 Golden Douchebag Awards are in, and the “winners” have been crowned. (Adult/Entertainer)

In an interview with Newsweek, Jane Lynch and Dan Savage told John McCain to go fuck himself. Don’t worry, John, you still have Snooki in your corner! (Popbytes)

I’m not sure how many of you are doing a Secret Santa this year, but if you are, pray that you don’t get Simon Cowell as yours, unless you want a ridiculously expensive and insulting gift. (Agent Bedhead)

Oh look, another Supercut! This one is all about the miracle of child birth, and chances are if you have a vagina, it will probably be in sympathy-pain by the end of this. (Screen Junkies)

For any of you philanthropic gamers out there, the second Humble Indie Bundle is out if you want to buy five awesome games for whatever price you want and give to charity at the same time. Although don’t be one of those dicks that doesn’t even pay $10. Seriously, that’s just harsh. (HumbleBundle)

Here are 23 TV episodes based on A Christmas Carol. While some of these are pretty good (specifically, the Xena one), none of them are stop-motion animated, so your argument is invalid. (A.V. Club)


I won’t ruin the surprise on this video, except to say that Santa appears in the most awe-inspiring, magical way possible. If this doesn’t jingle your bells, nothing will.

Jeremy Feist is Pajiba’s resident link slave and dickerdoodle maker. You can email him links here.









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Comments

Dickerdoodle maker? Is that where you use your cock to create random drawings or something?

(Behold the magic that is... DICKERDOODLES! - JF)

Posted by: CptCrckpot at December 21, 2010 12:17 PM

That Bloggess link got something in my eyes for a long time.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at December 21, 2010 12:25 PM

Dickerdoodles are magic. The best and brightest young bakers all across the land form delicious penile-shaped cookies and photograph them in compromising positions. It's a true Christmas tradition that really makes you think.

Posted by: Robert at December 21, 2010 12:26 PM

Suck it, McCain.

That said, that Popbytes website is fucking dizzying. Seriously, it makes me want to lie down, or throw up. Ease up with the colors, guys.

Regardless, read the full Newsweek article. It's super cool.

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/12/20/dan-savage-and-jane-lynch.html

Posted by: The Other Agent Johnson at December 21, 2010 12:35 PM

I'm crying like a baby after the Bloggess link. I'm sending it to all my coworkers, who are now mocking me for crying at work. Which I promised I wouldn't do anymore (it's so cliche' to cry when you're drunk). Thanks for posting that, Feist.

Posted by: superasente at December 21, 2010 12:38 PM

As for the Black Swan scene... that was... incredibly hot, but is it just me or was there much too much slurping in the sound editing?

Oi, I feel so dirty even typing that...

Posted by: Patty O'Green at December 21, 2010 12:38 PM

After having watched the Father Christmas video that Black Swan clip was the best thing ever in the history of for-fucking-ever. Ok, it would be a pretty damn great thing by itself but the contrast of my plans to punish myself after the Christmas video compared to my plans to "Punish myself" after the Black Swan video...yeah.

Posted by: Paultera at December 21, 2010 12:50 PM

We completely missed the cutoff for the Dickerdoodles competition this year! But Child's Play is a great charity and I give them a yearly donation. As in most things, Penny Arcade for the win!

Posted by: TylerDFC at December 21, 2010 12:57 PM

You guys have snow in Toronto? It makes me feel a little better about the rain we're getting in Moncton.

That Bloggess link made me openly weep, which is fine since I took the afternoon off and am curled up on my couch.

As a somewhat skinny chick I know it sucks to be called out on your weight but damn Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis are skinny in that clip. They look ill.

Posted by: becks at December 21, 2010 1:07 PM

there was a snow storm in Toronto yesterday?! i'm in Toronto and it hasn't snowed since saturday and even that was just a light dusting.

hmmm...

(You're kidding, right? Did you not see the giant-ass chucks of snow that fell in St. James Town? Which part are you in? - JF)

Posted by: causaubon at December 21, 2010 1:32 PM

in the most awe-inspiring, magical way possible.

Did I miss the part where the TARDIS materializes and Santa walks out?

(Okay, make that SECOND most awe-inspiring, magical way possible. - JF)

Posted by: Jay at December 21, 2010 1:39 PM

Thank you JF. I actually know what Dickerdoodles are, as I am a long time fan of Penny Arcade, but I was hoping someone would offer an explanation or link so everyone could learn about them, and you played right into my hands. Plus, I got to make a really lame joke, which is always a bonus!

(Actually, quick confession: Your comment terrified me. If you've never heard of sounding, it's the practice of sticking steel rods up your peehole. I've never been a fan, and after having a catheter yanked earlier this year... Well, that's just straight-up nightmare feul. Yee-ipes. So now I have a mortal fear of sticking anything in my urethra. - JF)

Posted by: CptCrckpot at December 21, 2010 1:52 PM

i'm in Little Italy. no snow here.

Posted by: causaubon at December 21, 2010 2:11 PM

> > there was a snow storm in Toronto
> > yesterday?! i'm in Toronto and it
> > hasn't snowed since saturday and
> > even that was just a light dusting.

> > hmmm...

> (You're kidding, right? Did you not
> see the giant-ass chucks of snow that
> fell in St. James Town? Which part
> are you in? - JF)

Maybe St. James Town has its own micro climate... because I'm with causaubon... it hasn't snowed in days. I know this because I haven't had to shovel anything since Friday. Or maybe snow was drifting off the tops of the buildings? I work at St. Clair & Yonge & I live at St. Clair & Dufferin...

Posted by: Nisi at December 21, 2010 2:22 PM

I really think that it snowed a lot in very specific places, as weird as that sounds. I live in Mississauga and work in Scarborough (jealous?) and we've had barely any snow in the west end, but just on my commute home the other day I passed through what seemed like two or three completely separate weather patterns.

And since there are so many Torontonians on here today, what is up with the goddam 401 East this past week? Last week my commute home was almost 3 hours long on three separate days. Thank dog for podcasts.

Posted by: Nicole at December 21, 2010 2:40 PM

Weird December weather so far.
Tiny big snow storms in Toronto?

Posted by: OldSchool60 at December 21, 2010 2:46 PM

...maybe lake effects snow?

We need a meteorologist in here STAT!

Posted by: OldSchool60 at December 21, 2010 2:48 PM

It's all guess-work.

Posted by: meteorologist at December 21, 2010 3:11 PM

I'd never heard of sounding JF, and I will try very hard to forget that I've now heard of it. When I made the original joke, I was thinking more along the lines of peeing ones name in the snow. Sorry to have terrified you.

Now off to bleach my brain, to erase the horrible knowledge you imparted to me!

Posted by: CptCrckpot at December 21, 2010 3:19 PM

The story from The Bloggess just wiped away nearly all of my stocked up cynicism.
(I'll save a little for McCain.)

Thanks for sharing the link - it was awesome.

Posted by: Simon at December 21, 2010 3:24 PM

I second the Popbytes comment--what an eyesore of a site. Clearly the creators are fans of the "throw it and see what sticks" theory of design. My retinas are burning.

Posted by: DeadBessie at December 21, 2010 3:27 PM

> I live in Mississauga and work in
? Scarborough (jealous?)

Nicole... my condolences.

Posted by: Nisi at December 21, 2010 3:59 PM

Nisi...thank you.

Posted by: Nicole at December 21, 2010 4:32 PM

All right, that's it. I will NOT have a baby. I will be a cool aunt or adopt kids or just have 18 dogs. My vagina is going to need therapy after that video.

Posted by: esme at December 21, 2010 4:33 PM

I paid 5 bucks for the humble bundle this year. What are you trying to say?

Posted by: The_wakeful at December 21, 2010 5:11 PM

Jeremy, there were reports of snow across our state the day before yesterday. I only mention this because I live in Australia and yesterday was our summer solstice. So the snow was a little confusing.

Posted by: ScienceGeek at December 21, 2010 7:12 PM

It was 80 degrees here in Dallas today. As of this moment (7:05 pm CST), it's 76 degrees.

It is just as awesome as it sounds. I do feel a little bad for the snowbound.

Posted by: Slash at December 21, 2010 8:07 PM

It's all guess-work.

Posted by: meteorologist at December 21, 2010 3:11 PM

I KNEW it!

I think that AV Club list is missing the Buffy Christmas episode where it snows. You know, the one where Xander does the Snoopy Dance? I mean, c'mon! Snoopy dance!

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at December 21, 2010 10:11 PM

MelBivDevoe, didn't Xander do the Snoopy Dance in the episode where he got split into his weak and strong sides? He did the dance to prove to Willow he was who he said he was. I don't think that happened in the Christmas ep; that one was full of brooding Angel and plans of suicide. Good times.

If there isn't a gif out there of the Xander Snoopy Dance, someone needs to get on it.

Posted by: DeadBessie at December 22, 2010 9:18 AM

If there isn't a gif out there of the Xander Snoopy Dance, someone needs to get on it.

For this, among other things, I will always love DeadBessie.

Posted by: Patty O'Green at December 22, 2010 9:29 AM