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The Universe is About to Have One Less Crappy Robin Williams Movie

By Stacey Nosek | Posted Under Pajiba Love | Comments (44)

facesofolddogs.jpg

Remember that retardical Robin Williams vehicle we reported on back in August that was about a divorced couple who kidnap their daughter on her wedding day so she doesn’t make the same mistake as them, which would have no doubt ended with them reconciling and giving said daughter their blessing? [Deep breath] Well, Disney decided to to do the merciful thing (for once) and take it behind the woodshed. (Cinematical)

Here’s a piece on the drunkest movies perfect for New Year’s Eve viewing. If you’re a totally boring film nerd like my roommate, anyway. (PW)

A bird pooped on Tori Spelling’s head. Really, you don’t need to click on the article because that’s the entire story. (Litelysalted)

Ha ha, silly Sarah Jessica Parker. She actually thought she could get rid of that big mole on her face and everybody wouldn’t make a gigantic deal out of it. (Celebitchy)

The first still from The Runaways is out, and Dakota Fanning and Kristen Stewart actually look pretty badass in it. (Agent Bedhead)

Patton Oswalt did a spoof of “The Room,” and I think whether or not you’ve actually seen the movie, it’s still pretty hilarious. (Notes on Bar Napkins)

Huh, is it really almost Avatar time already? Well, on that, here are Great Moments in 3-D. (Screen Junkies)

Spend too much time and money dying your hair? UGH! Thankfully the Harriet Carter Catalog has come up with a convenient and affordable alternative. (IBBB)

FX’s new series “Lawman” just got changed to “Justified.” No, no, not “Steven Seagal: Lawman,” the other one. Yeah, that’s why they changed it. (Warming Glow)

Bethenny Frankel from one of those “Real Housewives” shows is the latest dumbass to pose naked for PETA. Do any of you ‘jibans actually watch that stuff? (Celebslam)

All those Right Wingnuts are always bitching that the liberals want to ruin Christmas. Here the whole time it was actually just Florida. (YBNBY)

Greg Brady’s 30-year-old girlfriend tried to kill him and stole a bunch of his money. Well that’s what you get when you trade off “certifiably insane” for dating a chick half your age. (DListed)

If watching “Intervention” wasn’t enough to make you want to stay off the meth, here’s this guy, “Christopher the Dancing Elf.” You can blame Dr. Pisaster on this one.

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.









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Comments

Ha ha, silly Sarah Jessica Parker. She actually thought she could get rid of that big mole on her face and everybody wouldn’t make a gigantic deal out of it.
---
Moleface?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH!!!

Heh ...

Well, giddy-up, SJP, this field ain't gonna plow itself ...

Posted by: , at December 16, 2009 1:06 PM

Here’s a piece on the drunkest movies perfect for New Year’s Eve viewing.

That sounds like a Ted Pajiba Guide waiting to happen.

Posted by: Cindy at December 16, 2009 1:07 PM

How bad does a a Robin Williams movie have to be before it's too bad for theaters? That's like if your shit stinks too much for the sewer.

Posted by: George at December 16, 2009 1:08 PM

Greg Brady's girlfriend ew.

Looks a lot like SJP sans mole, actually.

Posted by: , at December 16, 2009 1:10 PM

A shiny internet nickel to anyone who actually gets through the 7+ minutes of that elf.

BTW, is it just me, or does the elf (from the neck up) look and sound like Patton Oswalt doing a funny voice?

Posted by: Three-nineteen at December 16, 2009 1:12 PM

Doctor P., I could only make it 30 seconds. What's the diagnosis? Oh and please give that guy a cookie.

Posted by: Cindy at December 16, 2009 1:13 PM

Bethenny Frankel from one of those “Real Housewives” shows is the latest dumbass to pose naked for PETA. Do any of you ‘jibans actually watch that stuff?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Does anybody actually watch those shows?

Posted by: Jadine at December 16, 2009 1:14 PM

I watched Real Housewives of Atlanta and it was HILARIOUS. The others were pretty boring and I didn't get past one episode, but the Atlanta version was absolutely brilliant. I'm surprised you didn't watch that, Stacey. You would LOVE uber trashy she-male Kim and the truly hilarious Nene. LOVED IT.

I suspect Pisaster's doctorate is in Pain and Horror.

Posted by: figgy at December 16, 2009 1:18 PM

Dakota Fanning isn't a cute little girl anymore? I'm not sure I can deal with that.

Posted by: the_wakeful at December 16, 2009 1:20 PM

Greg Brady is a tool. Always has been, always will be. He's the only one of the lot of them that can't seem to move past "being a Brady". Peter is running a close second, but at least he is involved with projects outside of the Brady sphere.

Posted by: elsie at December 16, 2009 1:33 PM

I've never read the Harriet Carter Wednesday thing before, but HOLY FUCKING GOD that is comedic gold. Especially that last one. I'm going to go have a nice long talk with my coffee maker now. Toodles.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at December 16, 2009 1:35 PM

I made it a whole 1:03.

...It's over SEVEN MINUTES?! Jeez, Stacey, what have we done to make you hate us?

Posted by: Jerce at December 16, 2009 1:37 PM

Anyone else think that still pic of Robin Williams was taken while he was grunting and straining to squeeze out a huge stinking steaming greasy shitlog of shit, but it was caught halfway in and halfway out of his butthole?

Or is it just me?

Posted by: Fappy McFapper at December 16, 2009 1:39 PM

Fewer! One FEWER Crappy Robin Williams Movie!
*jumps out window and zooms away*

Posted by: GrammarBitch at December 16, 2009 1:40 PM

I'm naked and wearing fur RIGHT NOW!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 16, 2009 1:50 PM

Through sheer force of will I made it 1:40 into that elf dance. My Godtopus. I have no words.

Posted by: tamatha at December 16, 2009 2:01 PM

How is Arthur not on that alcoholic movies list?
I have to admit, I've yet to make it past the 2 minute mark on that video. But I've watched the first 30 seconds about twenty times.

Posted by: dr. pisaster at December 16, 2009 2:03 PM

I only made it through 4 seconds of that elf...thing. That voice will haunt my nightmares.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at December 16, 2009 2:23 PM

All I could think of on that elf vid was 'This is either the Worst Kids Show Ever!' or 'Take your clothes off, Bitch!'

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 16, 2009 2:48 PM

Dakota looks bad ass.
Kristen Stewart looks like the pretty boy I thought she was from Panic Room up until ten minutes into Twilight.

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 2:51 PM

Does the elf have boobs?

43 seconds.

Posted by: schrome at December 16, 2009 2:55 PM

So I started that elf video and no lie, my dog sitting next to me jumped off the couch, gave me the perked up ears, what the fuck is that look, then shook his head violently, like the flapping of his ears could actually drown out the horrible sound of that guys voice.

I kept it playing, he gave me a whine and walked out of the room.

My dog is officially smarter than I am.

Posted by: ashes at December 16, 2009 2:59 PM

Francis Bean is seeking a permanent restraining order against her psycho bitch mother.
YIKES

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 3:02 PM

I can't wait for the Runaways biopic. It's gonna be awesome.

Patton Oswald is hilarious. He needs to team up with that guy and make those movies.

Never, EVER, link to that dancing elf guy again. He frightens me. As of today, I am sober. No more meth for me. Also, since when is jumping up and down considered dancing? I hope someone helps him find a beat. It was really painful watching him clap.

Posted by: Peanut_Butter_And_James at December 16, 2009 3:28 PM

You guys, I watched ALL of the dancing elf. I don't know what that says about me, but it struck me as I was watching him that he reminds me a lot of the high school kids in the functional skills class. The ones that need an escort everywhere, including to the bathroom. The ones that wail loudly sometimes for no reason.

In other words, I really think he's mentally disabled.

Posted by: Snuggiepants the Deathbringer at December 16, 2009 3:30 PM

Okay. Immediately aftr this post I will watch the Elf. Comments to follow

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 3:33 PM

I'm less disturbed, more pissed he appears to have a smaller waist than me.
WHORE.


ps. Vagina

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 3:35 PM

Bethanny was actually the only reason to watch Real Housewives of New York. She was really snarky and seemed like she was judging the crazies on the show just like the people at home did.

Posted by: Claire at December 16, 2009 3:39 PM

Ashes:
Ha! My dog jumped up and stared at the screen too!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 16, 2009 3:40 PM

SweetlittlebabyjeebusGodtopusinheavenabove, that fucking elf is, is, is.....I can't even think of a word. Or words. I am speechless. And I made it 48 seconds, and then cheated and went forward about 3 minutes and....yep, same crazy tweeked out elvin wingnut of a batshit monkeyfucker doing the same crazy tweeked out elvin wingnut of a batshit monkeyfucker dance.

Posted by: John Denvr's Wingman at December 16, 2009 4:41 PM

And it looks like someone stole Denver's "e". Has anyone seen a Lindsey with two e's runnin' around here?

Posted by: John Denvr's Wingman at December 16, 2009 4:43 PM

SHE WENT EAST!!! SADDLE THE HORSES!

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 5:22 PM

I have to admit that new jersey housewives was amazing
'Viper Whore Prostitute'

'Engaged 19 Fucking Times' (and flips over a table)
Ah Teresa Guidice you are hilarious. Ugly and ignorant but still hilarious.

Im not even touching that elf thing my brain cant take it.
Also I think Dakota and Kristen look fab and I like them both.....let the beatings begin.

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at December 16, 2009 5:33 PM

*KARATE CHOP*

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 5:48 PM

Snuggie, he's autistic. And from Georgia. (I actually delved all the way into his youtube page. He dresses up like that and dances for all the local parades. I would feel bad about laughing at him, but he obviously enjoys the attention. If this is how he engages with the world...well, it's weird but I ain't gonna judge.)

Posted by: dr. pisaster at December 16, 2009 5:53 PM

I couldn't agree more good Dr. I feel bad now as well.

At least we still have hell to look forward to.

And we can call off the dogs, I found my "e".

Posted by: John Denver's Wingman at December 16, 2009 5:55 PM

Call them off?
Oh...
Oh dear.
I'll be in Alaska.
Wait. Palin is there.
I'll be....any where else

Posted by: Nadine at December 16, 2009 5:59 PM

I played Mr. Elf for 37 seconds and my dogs did nothing; not even a ear flick. But that's German Shepherds for you: smart, smart, smart!

In playing said video to see pooches' reaction: pathetic, pathetic, pathetic.

Posted by: kootenay girl at December 16, 2009 6:12 PM

Nadine NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Not The Dogs!!!!!!

Posted by: Nieve 'The Threadkiller Queen' at December 16, 2009 6:36 PM

I'm naked and wearing fur RIGHT NOW!

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 16, 2009 1:50 PM
---
I have no fur, AND I'm not wearing any!

/scratch

Posted by: , at December 16, 2009 8:08 PM

Oh my god, does that dancing elf video actually go on for 7 minutes!? Did anyone make it through more than about 10 seconds?

Posted by: Alarmjaguar at December 16, 2009 10:45 PM

wow, just read the comments, some of you guys have stamina!

Posted by: Alarmjaguar at December 16, 2009 10:54 PM

Itches like a mo'fo huh, Big Daddy?

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at December 16, 2009 11:17 PM

Yes Bethenny Frankel is my favorite Real Housewife right after crazy Vicki from OC. What can I say nobody does reality tv quite like Bravo.

Posted by: grace b at December 17, 2009 11:25 AM