Pajiba

I'd be willing to buy a Holmito combo, but that taco better have some cocaine.

Oops wrong thread, pretend that never happened. Bleach your brain.

AdventureMan is baaaaaaack!

Heehee. "Is Lady Gaga a man?"

I suspect Jeeves don't know either.

My "No Whining Wednesday" is complete. Anytime I see the Nic Cage "NOT THE BEEEEESSS" picture I can't help but smile. My day is now complete.

J2K was robbed. Obviously, that is the most horrible, hopelessly entertaining in spite of utter fuckery film of the Aughts. Skirt made of ties. Hovercraft racing. Southern Belle villain with Daddy issues. Famewhores. Outdoor beach scenes with digitally added blue skies because the sun barely broke during the winter shoot. I could go on. I won't.

Surely nothing could quelch my anger over this.

Ooh...pretty kitty...

How'd it get burned? How'd it get burned? HOW'D IT GET BURRRNNED!

Yup, instant classic.

hang in there slim,we haven`t seen the best yet,think all this is going over well in the kobe household?

Is anyone else really starting to like Adventureman? It's like an English as a Second Language student is translating something from a foriegn language. The only problem is that they are using a literal translation instead of using context to find the conversational phrases. I almost understood that one! Ha! Anyway, I fresh from the de-lurking comment thread and feeling frisky!

I thought Adventureman was riffing on some sort of mistranslation from the Chinese media video, but I guess not. And that video is hilarious.

Tiger, my man, my offer still stands.

O.J.

This may be the fistful of Advil I shoved down my throat talking, but Twilight Is My Life may be the funniest thing EVER. If this site was a person...Well, I wouldn't fuck it because quite frankly I'd be a little embarassed to be seen with it in public, but I would definitely send it some slutty cell phone pics then call it a filthy child prostitute.

*looks at Adventureman post again*

I don't . . . what . . . guh?

I think we have to be careful here. Given the very low bar set by Steve Phillips' Tubby Temptress (and Letterman's fling), I think Tiger Woods did very, very well for himself on the "Official 2009 Women To Have An Affair With" rankings.

I think his choices are on par with, say, Elliot Spitzer's and he didn't even have to pay like $2,000 an hour or whatever.

Let's reel in a bit here and be a bit more realistic in all of this. Everyone's getting caught up in the hype.

I don't get the Adventureman post, either, Lauren.

I'm in if you take out the comma so it's named "Man Fuck Twilight". People show up to the site looking for full-size naked Edward Cullen posters and sparkly dildos and get us. Think of the comments!

To be honest, I'd rather get a tattoo than a taquito from 7-11.

So nobody but me is upset that Meredith Baxter Birney is a lesbian? Gah, I keep forgetting when you people were born. That's okay, not your fault. Where the hell is bucdaddy?

Yep, she was smoking hot back then. And such a good mom, too. Making for a rather complicated package, spank-fodder-wise....

That Freedom Tray actually looks pretty useful. Stupid name, yeah, but still.

Wait, we're still dubbing things "Freedom __ "? I thought the whole point of that a few years back was to give a big "Fuck You" to France. Is the tray French?

Trays are useful, yes. But labeling them "Freedom Trays" and making them red, white, & blue just to drive up sales makes me stabby.

I can't get the Twilight life link to open. :(

Anyone else feel like AdventureMan ripped some pages out of the dictionary and put them on his dartboard and that's how he writes a sentence, one dart at a time?

sansho1: Good luck with your time machine. Just remember, don't use today's knowledge to change the past or you will create an infinity loop. With that in mind, you totally have a shot with the 1985 Meredith Baxter. Happy hunting.

I think AdventureMan is a writer for Family Guy.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at December 2, 2009 5:38 PM

TOTALLY! It's like a robot version of Stewie that has malfunctioned! Damn you, Seth McFarlane, damn you to hell!

They really don't need to ask Jeeves, he's a hack, I have all the answers.

1. What is Twitter?

The last sign of the end of times.

2. Have I got swine flu?

Throw a glass of water on your face, if it turns to steam, head to the nearest cast member of The Hills, and cough in their face.

If the cast is unavailable, please cough on Joe Francis as a substitute.

3. Is Lady Gaga a man?

It took you 4 months to figure that out.

4. Who is Aleksandr Orlov?Have I got Ha

If you're not even going to finish the question, you're a waste of my time.

5. Is Michael Jackson dead?

No, he was abducted by aliens, he escaped, and is now living in a retirement home with Elvis and a black JFK.

6. Where is my nearest Primark?

As long as you don't shop at Hot Topic, it doesn't matter where you buy clothes in my book.

7. Who is the father of Heather’s baby in EastEnders?

John Edwards, and the prick's not paying child support.

8. What is the Lisbon Treaty?

The treaty signed between America and the rest of the world to allow all further toxic sewage dumps to be held in Crawford, Texas.

9. When will the recession end?

Who knows, as long as Glenn Beck is on the air, it may never end. You know what to do to end that.

10. What is cervical cancer?

A horrible vaginal disease caused by George Lopez, I recommend we throw him in a vat of drain cleaner, just to be on the safe side.

You see, I have all the answers, as long as your not concerned with superfluous things such as facts.

You're all nuts. Especially Logar but especially Pinky Mcladybits.

I've never been as to write go look more like. I spend decided to use every time licking Popsicle go want. Thank you but I am next day worried that I couldn't try it. I've even want at school to make more like Pajiba to use me never. You are an important part of the computer.

Speaking of this 'Family Guy' show. I tuned in for about 4 minutes the
other night. So the joke is that no one knows/hears/cares that the baby
Stewart speaks. And he's British? But the dog's in on it? And he talks also?
But only to the man? Geez, more research to do on today's popular culture.

Adventureman is Chuck Palahniuk in full "Pygmy" mode. It's a beautiful thing.

At least in "Pygmy" you could decipher what the hell Palahniuk was talking about. AdventureMan...not so much

Re: Meredith Baxter--that's why you gotta stay out of the sun, folks. Sure, I'm pasty white but I'm totally wrinkle free.

,-- Glitter's on the other page. I've read about but never before seen anything from The Room--that was unbelievably awful. Was there no one on the whole production with the guts to stand up and scream "This sucks and we will be forever mocked for it!"? I don't even want to think about the main dude being in sex scenes. He looks like a hardcore tranny.

The Freedom Tray and Twilight site were massively depressing. And just to prove that increased association with all things Twilight makes you dumber, it took me three tries to spell "...light" right. What I love about the tray video was how the woman in the car is first handed the supposed "crappy" tray that has a much more convenient handle for carrying and yet spills it, but has no trouble with the bulky handle-less version they're trying to hock.

And you guys continue to be hilarious.

I found a HOTTEST interracial club =MixedConnect--*__*--C 0 M=for black Women and white Men, or black Men and white Women, to interact with each other. Interracial is not a problem here, but a great merit to cherish!

Not 100% sure I all of that, but I pretty much agree with the majority of what you said.