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November 25, 2008 |

By Stacey Nosek | Pajiba Love | November 25, 2008 |

This is pretty much the best thing I’ve heard in the history of hearing things: Mann Schmoulter’s mouth has literally been wired shut. (NY Post)

I know you guys are going to bitch at me for posting this, but whatever. Everyone’s favorite fuckface reality show couple got married for real-like! Who wants in on a divorce poll with me? (WIMB)

Here is the funniest skit from last week’s “Saturday Night Live” that didn’t make it on air. Which, for me, is inconsequential since I haven’t been watching anyway. (QuizLaw)

And on that note, former SNL staple Horatio Sanz becomes the first “funny fat guy” to escape the SNL curse. Oh wait, that’s right… “Funny.” (Celebitchy)

Amy Winehouse and her husband are apparently splitting because their relationship was based on drug-fueled three ways. It’s OK, the vomitous reaction is natural. Get it all up, now. (IDLYITW)

And somebody should probably tell Amy about it once she wakes up in the hospital in the early stages of withdraw. Because, that’s where she is again! (The Blemish)

Vampire assclown/male hair enthusiast Robert Pattinson makes the “Bedhead Hall of Shame.” (Agent Bedhead)

Little known fact: the hot dog launcher is my favorite thing about going to Phillies games. How can you not love a giant gun that fires meat? (SeriousEats)

And now, a musical interlude. (omg blog)

Matthew McConaughey’s mighty peen and sack still cannot be contained by mere mortal human methods! (cityrag)

How bad is the global economy you ask? It’s so bad that they can’t even sell vodka to Russians! Zing! No, that’s actually true. (Evil Beet)

Are there rules of etiquette when it comes to other people’s farts? One time at an old job I had to train a girl on a day where the AC was broke and I was the worst intestinal cramps coupled with rotten egg smelling farts. It would have been nice to “clear the air,” so to speak. (Jezebel)

Keep warm and toasty or burn your favorite books to the Colbert Christmas Yule Log. (ColbertNation)

Aww… Save a cute little turkey bo-burkey. It’ll make you feel better about the one you eat on Thursday. (CuteOverload)

The new Snoopy Flying Ace game has Nazis in it? What is this fuckery? (MightyGodKing)

J_Capri mentioned the term “observatory prophylaxis” on yesterday’s Love’s comment thread. And here is a clip I snagged from Sofia’s blog. Need I say more?

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Pajiba Love | November 25, 2008 |

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