Pajiba Love 11/20/08

Benji Madden To Go Back To Writing Songs About How He Hates Rich And Famous People Again

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | November 20, 2008 | Comments (58)

Yeah, I’m starting out with Paris Hilton news today. And just what the hell are you going to do about it, huh? Bitch in the comments? Well, be my fucking guest! (WIMB)

A retarded high school janitor gets scammed by a bunch of teenage boys who trade fake pictures of their wieners in exchange for buying them beer. True story. (QuizLaw)

Part one of two, the Top 20 Best Cover Songs, by my good friend Ms. Mix & Bitch. Mini-dirve, what’s your fave? I will always love “Mrs. Robinson” by the Lemonheads, so help me God. (MixTapeTherapy)

Jennifer Garner is being stalked by the “reincarnation of the prophet Enoch.” Well at least it’s not just some random crazy person, anyway. (Yeeeah!)

The public crybaby pissing match between Tim Robbins and the New York City Board of Elections sadly continues. (HuffPo)

Former Sleater-Kinney awesome-o extraordinaire Carrie Brownstein takes the new “Wii Music” for a spin. (Slate)

Ha! The lame gay vampire from Twilight is totally the new Zoolander! (FilmExperience)

Hahahahahaha. Stephen Baldwin says that he was “joking” about moving to Canada if Obama won. They don’t want you either, do they S-Bald? (Celebitchy)

Anyone want to guess what MTV VJ contest winner Jesse Camp is up to these days? If you said “exposing himself,” you win the prize! (NSFW) (omg blog)

Yellow Brick Road cake or Old, Rotting Banana? You be the judge. (CakeWrecks)

Is Facebook creepy? In a word, yes. I’ve been added by everyone from a jerk who bullied me in high school (and then denied it when I message-confronted him) to an old neighbor who babysat me as a kid. (Bowl Of Stupid)

I can totally see Suri Cruise tenting her fingers together ominously. (Celebslam)

I saw this when I was browsing through my reader last night and spit wine on the keyboard. I don’t know if it was that funny or I was that drunk. (UnnecessaryQuotes)

Dream casting for the titular roles in a movie called The World’s Most Annoying Man? Simple, two words: Perez Fucking Hilton. OK, three. (CC Insider)

God, I love Panera Bread. It’s pretty much the only fast food I’ll still eat, and I really want to try these breakfast sandwiches. Like right now. No really, I’m kinda starving here. (TIB)

Holy gross. I think I’m gonna have to cancel on the Panera now, after reading these hospital stories. (RantsFromThePants)

Boiler alert! 100 Hollywood films spoiled in five minutes. I’m glad I finally saw There Will Be Blood This weekend before I watched this.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Comments

If a were this Madde douche I'd be more worried about things like:

White Cell counts
Nucleoside Reverse Transcriptase Inhibitors (NRTI)
Drug Cocktails

and

Protease Inhibitors

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at November 20, 2008 12:05 PM

S-Bald. Haaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Posted by: boo at November 20, 2008 12:10 PM

Maaaaaan I can't wait for Twilight to CRASH. AND BURN.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARHGG@*#&(@%^$(&@#($^*(&$!!!

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at November 20, 2008 12:13 PM

Off the top of my head, my favorite cover songs are:

-Weezer's "Worry Rock," from Green Day.
-Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah," from Leonard Cohen.
-Jeffrey Gaines' "Your Eyes," from Peter Gabriel.
-Johnny Cash's "Hurt," from NIN.
-Jimi Hendrix's "All Along the Watchtower," from Bob Dylan
-Green Day's "Working Class Hero," from John Lennon.

Posted by: Julie at November 20, 2008 12:15 PM

The Gourds, "Gin and Juice"

Nuclear Assault, "Good Times, Bad Times"

Metallica, either "Green Hell" or "Die, Die, Die My Darling"

Flunk, "Blue Monday"

Orgy, "Blue Monday" (I love both versions and hate the original)

But my current favorite is, and likely will be for a long time:

The Gypsy Kings, "Hotel California"

Posted by: TK at November 20, 2008 12:28 PM

Janet Napolitano's cover of "the Scientist".

Posted by: phquaryn at November 20, 2008 12:33 PM

I definitely agree with the Sundays' "Wild Horses," Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah," and Janis Joplin's "Me and Bobby McGee" as two of the best covers. Other favorites:

-Yael Naim's spooky cover of "Toxic" by Britney Spears
-Fugees' "Killing Me Softly"
-Nirvana's "The Man Who Sold the World"

Posted by: Melissa at November 20, 2008 12:38 PM

I love Jesse Camp! He was my favorite part of TRL in my 14-16 year old days, I remember once they had a Jesse Camp lookalike contest.

Also I think that he was constantly on meth.

His penis is a slight disappointment.

Posted by: Annie_Reckson at November 20, 2008 12:39 PM

The governor of Arizona did a Coldplay cover? Well, I'll be damned.

I'm fucking with you, phquaryn . I assume you meant Johnette Napolitano.

Posted by: TK at November 20, 2008 12:41 PM

Me & Mrs. Jones -- Hall & Oates
That's the 1st one that comes to mind.

Posted by: wsapnin at November 20, 2008 12:43 PM

NIN - "Get Down, Make Love"
Metallica - "The Prince"
Kula Shaker - "Hush"
Kate Bush - "Rocket Man"
Liz Phair - "Turning Japanese"
Ramones - "Spider Man" (actually pretty much anything from Saturday Morning: Cartoon's Greatest Hits)

Facebook is indeed creepy. Hey, we haven't spoke to each other in over twelve years (despite knowing where you live, your phone number, and where you work), yet you think I'm gonna decide to converse with you now? Not that there's any bad blood between us, but if I really wanted to be your pal, don't you think I would've gotten a hold of you already?

Posted by: Skitz at November 20, 2008 12:43 PM

Can you imagine going in for a tonsillectomy but being burned alive instead? JAWESOME!

Posted by: Snath at November 20, 2008 12:54 PM

Siouxsie and the Banshees cover of "Dear Prudence"
Frente - Bizarre Love Triangle
kidneythieves' cover of Patsy Cline's "Crazy"
Nick Cave - "Waltzing Matilda"
Dax Riggs - In an Aeroplane Over the Sea
Afghan Whigs' cover of "Will You STill Love me Tomorrow"

Oh and on CakeWrecks, check out the censored wreck, the "expectant mother in a bathtub" cake. Ive had nightmares since I saw that one.

Posted by: MG at November 20, 2008 12:55 PM

I just saw that one MG, what is WRONG with people?!

Posted by: Julie at November 20, 2008 12:59 PM

Agree on Cash's Hurt, which I think is better than his Personal Jesus.

There needs to be something from Mike Patton on that list. It could be War Pigs or Easy (probably Easy) from his Faith No More days, it could be Easy, or it could be Gaye's Desperate Situation from Peeping Tom, but however you slice it Patton needs a song on that list.

Ice T and Body Count did a killer cover of Hey Joe.

Vernon Reid fucking shreded Sunshine of Your Love with Living Colour.

I always like RATM's Ghost of Tom Joad and Maggie's Farm.

Posted by: Eep at November 20, 2008 1:01 PM

Red Hot Chili Peppers - "Love Rollercoaster"

Off the Beavis and Butthead Do America soundtrack. Top two favorite soundtrack ever, next to the soundtrack to Mortal Kombat.

I am sooooo lame.

Posted by: Snath at November 20, 2008 1:03 PM

Eep, I'd nominate his cover of Burt Bacharach's "This Guy's in Love With You." I think I want that to be my wedding song. Although I do love "Easy."

Posted by: MG at November 20, 2008 1:05 PM

In addition to those already mentioned,

Save Ferris - Come on Eileen
Bouncing Souls (also Reel Big Fish) - Take on Me
Goldfinger - 99 Red Balloons
Disturbed - Shout
DMB - All Along the Watchtower

just about everything by Me First and the Gimme Gimmes

Posted by: TylerDFC at November 20, 2008 1:05 PM

Julie, did you see where that linked to the anatomically correct mother giving birth?!?! That one makes me shudder to think about.

Posted by: MG at November 20, 2008 1:08 PM

Ew, NO. Nooooo!!! :runs off to look for it:

Posted by: Julie at November 20, 2008 1:10 PM

Best covers that I can think of right now:
Knockin' on Heaven's Door (Live version) - Guns N Roses
Do Ya Think I'm Sexy - Revolting Cocks

Reading the Facebook thing has convinced me that it is an attention whore's dream come true, which is why it's so popular, since we are a nation of attention whores. "Ooh, I wonder if all those assholes I hated in high school still think about me and hopefully they'll read my bitchin' page and find out I'm better than them! Eleventy!!!"

What are you, 12? Damn. Our national motto ought to be, "Look at me!"

Posted by: Slash at November 20, 2008 1:19 PM

Radiohead cover The Headmaster Ritual

It's as fantastic as can be, though no one can get near Morrissey's gorgeous yodel-thing. )That sounds dirty.)

Posted by: Cindy at November 20, 2008 1:20 PM

I consider it a sign that our parents raised us mostly right that both my brother and I were smart enough to use fake names on facebook. Nobody from my past can find me unless I choose to approach them. Or they see me on a mutual friend's page - which is a liability because apparently I look exactly the same as I did in highschool.

Posted by: s. pisaster at November 20, 2008 1:20 PM

David Bowie's cover of the Pixies "Cactus". It's so fucking right...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQ-vbse8qI0

Posted by: courtney 2 at November 20, 2008 1:21 PM

Boy, I just don't edit my own comments well. I moved Easy up AND left it where it was. Outstanding.

Posted by: Eep at November 20, 2008 1:21 PM

And I agree, mg, although I also like "I Started a Joke."

You know what else is actually pretty good?
Warrant's "Train, Train."
Also kind of like Spiderbait's "Black Betty"
And I'm a sucker for Manson's Covers.

Oh, and Rammstein's cover of "Stripped."

Posted by: Eep at November 20, 2008 1:25 PM

Ooooh Eep good call on Rammstein's "Stripped," I love that song!

Posted by: Snath at November 20, 2008 1:34 PM

Okay, totally have to go with...

Feist: Inside & Out (The Beegees)
Elvis Costello: Gloomy Sunday (Billie Holiday)
Lauryn Hill: Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You

And wow, is it too late to add Jesse Camp yesterday's Seriously Random List? I mean holy bejeezers, his junk looks like a cork wedged into a tangerine.

Posted by: Jeremy Feist at November 20, 2008 1:35 PM

Reel Big Fish - "Hungry Like the Wolf"

Posted by: Snath at November 20, 2008 1:38 PM

I guess I have politics on the brain, TK. Ever so embarassing. Eep, I heart you just for mentioning Peeping Tom.

Posted by: phquaryn at November 20, 2008 1:44 PM

Speaking of Bowie, Bauhaus - Ziggy Stardust.

Posted by: Cindy at November 20, 2008 1:46 PM

I have a playlist in my itunes called coverlover. because I am a child of the 80s, some of my highly recommended faves include t.a.t.u.'s version of how soon is now? and ben folds and rufus wainwright's duet of careless whisper. but also go out and find ted leo covering kelly clarkson's since u been gone, with a little hit of maps in the middle. splendid. you can thank me later.

Posted by: melia at November 20, 2008 1:47 PM

Jeebus, I hope to hell Tim Robbins never gets pissed at me. So, yeah, today was really great, but ... I'm gonna have to ask you to get up and go, Susan. NOW.
+++
In their concerts, Drive-By Truckers usually cover "Play It All Night Long" (Warren Zevon), "Adam Raised a Cain" (Springsteen) and/or "People Who Died" (Jim Carroll), and they blister them all.

Also, Blaine Cartwright/Rev. Horton Heat: "Ace of Spades."

Possibly truest cover I've seen: The Tubes doing "Baba O'Reilly" in memory of Keith Moon.

Posted by: bucdaddy at November 20, 2008 1:53 PM

Johnny Cash- "Rusty Cage"
Jack White's cover of "Jolene" breaks my heart everytime I hear it.
Hole's live cover of "Hungry Like the Wolf" isn't good so much as VERY entertaining.

Posted by: HJ at November 20, 2008 1:56 PM

Ramones - "I Don't Want to Grow Up" (Tom Waits)

Devo - "Satisfaction" (Stones, duh)

Sonic Youth - "Superstar" (Carpenters)

That's it for now.

Posted by: Mattfactor at November 20, 2008 1:58 PM

Ted Leo's "Little Girl in Bloom."

The Futureheads' cover of "Hounds of Love," which I didn't realize was a cover at first because I am a leetle baby.

And now for the hat trick: Mandy Moore's "Umbrella."
(I also didn't realize this was a cover at first because I apparently am completely disconnected from popular culture.)

Posted by: Sabrina at November 20, 2008 1:58 PM

The Specials - Maggie's Farm
Marilyn Manson - Down In the Park
Lily Allen - Mr. Blue Sky
Old Crow Medicine Show - CC Rider
Black Keys - Have Love Will Travel

Posted by: king at November 20, 2008 3:08 PM

I was always a fan of Siouxsie and the Banshees cover of 'Helter Skelter'.
My newest favorite cover is Nouvelle Vague's cover of 'Dancing With Myself'.

Posted by: Jeni at November 20, 2008 5:32 PM

though no one can get near Morrissey's gorgeous yodel-thing

Sure I can.

Good stuff here. Anyone ever see Frankie Goes To Hollywood doing "Born To Run" on Saturday Night Live?

The Verlaines doing "Some Fantasy"

The White Stripes' "Death Letter". Good, wacked out guitar like that, that doesn't last long enough and that is never loud enough, makes me twitch involuntarily, like if someone was rubbing the back of my head and also licking my ear (which isn't all that different an experience, actually. See also: The Edge on the live "11 O'Clock Tick Tock", Ted Leo's "St. John the Divine" and Swervedriver's "Last Train to Satansville" for other sings that are dangerous when I'm driving).

"I'm Your Fan" contains my favorite versions of any Leonard Cohen song (except for Ian McCulloch also doing "Lover, Lover, Lover" on "Mysterio" I think it was), though the Bad Seeds' "Tower of Song" is clearly the superior of the two. And, once again, as ever, fuck Jeff Buckley. Cale, baby, Cale!!! I just don't particularly want to hear Leonard Cohen's voice or arrangements of his own song. I'm sure lots of people feel the same about Bob Dylan.

Both Moose and Luna did a good "Indian Summer". Oh and the Old 97s' "Mama Tried".

Posted by: Jay at November 20, 2008 5:46 PM

Oh, I forgot to add Ted Leo's cover of "Since You've Been Gone."

Yes, the Kelly Clarkson song. It is actually the shit.

Posted by: TK at November 20, 2008 6:32 PM

I'm surprised no one has mentioned Hendrix's cover of Sargent Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. He takes a great song and somehow makes it fucking amazing.

Also: I second the Me First and the Gimme Gimme's love. Their Over The Rainbow cover is brilliant.

Posted by: the_wakeful at November 20, 2008 6:53 PM

Oh yeah, so good it became an issue of why he wouldn't do it live. He did it as a sort of improptu thing for a web music show, like a radio station visit, just an acoustic guitar. Even throws in a "Maps" interlude that sounds very natural.

So it's grand, and people start shouting for it at his shows, and his explanation at the 2005 show in Atlanta was "I want it to be something I did, not something I do". Only Yo La Tengo's long "Speeding Motorcyle" nightmare can compare.

(For anyone unfamiliar, mind you, not to tell anyone what they already know, and I love to evangelize Ted anyway. He is, as Esquire once put it, worth believing in)

Posted by: Jay at November 20, 2008 6:54 PM

DMB and Hendrix's covers of "All along the watchtower"
Alanis Morrisette - "Crazy" I also love the hilarity of her version of "My Humps"
Blues Brothers - "Soul Man"
A New Found Glory - the soundtrack covers albums
Nirvana - "The man who sold the world" and "Lake of Fire"
Tori Amos - "Enjoy the Silence"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Landslide"
Scissor Sisters - "Comfortably Numb"
Social Distortion - "Ring of Fire"
Marilyn Manson - "Sweet Dreams"
Lemonheads - "Mrs. Robinson"
Ike and Tina Turner - "Proud Mary"

Posted by: Melody at November 20, 2008 7:48 PM

Slash, I absolutely agree -- I'm an attention whore and I know it. But it still doesn't take away from the fact that Facebook is -- like TK -- creepy as hell.

I've never thought of these people for 20 years ... THEY'VE contacted me, and posted old pictures of me, online. Who am I to deny the inevitable gloating I get to do now?

Posted by: A Bowl of Stupid at November 20, 2008 8:48 PM

facebook, arrgh! until i was talked into it, i had kept myself fairly anonymous. somehow, it grabbed my real name and posted it.

buffett's cover of james taylor's "mexico" is a favorite.
i know. i'm old and boring.

Posted by: bionic bunny at November 20, 2008 8:54 PM

And that's why you can't search for me.

I've been to Classmates, man. I ain't goin back there!

Posted by: Jay at November 20, 2008 8:55 PM

Sure I can.

I'm going to need some proof, Mr. Jay. That's a helluva claim.

Posted by: Cindy at November 20, 2008 8:59 PM

Well, you said "get near", now. That I can handle. Don't know that I could get through all of "Miserable Lie", mind you, since after a few minutes of that falsetto there's not much reserve left to yelp. That's a tricky one.

But I brought the house down singing "Panic" at a gay bar last Saturday, and that's gotta count for something. Hey, it's got the best selection in town and everyone's real friendly! Sadly, even they weren't excited by the Pulp I started with though. This town's just not into them.

Oh and just to be clear, I would be singing Danny's part, but if someone actually had a karaoke "Here's Where The Story Ends" I'd probably be willing to see if my Harriet Wheeler could last all the way to the end. Probably not, it was a little easier when I was 15.

Oh and that live cover of "Telegram Sam" that Bauhaus did is wonderful. Marc Bolan's shufflin' and chooglin' just sounds so......soft after that.

Posted by: Jay at November 20, 2008 9:32 PM

Harriet and Delores O'Riordon are a couple of the very few female singers I've enjoyed. Although, due to love complications I really don't do either of them any longer. I have some sort of weird dislike of most female singers. Karen O. is pretty acceptable. Anyway I'm off on a tangent.

How about the end of What Difference Does It Make - can you do that?

I haven't listened to a lot of Pulp - I think I was too into Blur at the time.

Posted by: Cindy at November 20, 2008 10:08 PM

How about the end of What Difference Does It Make

Probably not too bad, as the rest of the song's not stressful. I just don't have very resilient cords so I'm only good for short bursts at at time. I could never front a band, not that I'd ever want to. In actual bands I've always kept to the side.

Coincidentally Pulp opened on the Parklife tour. Glorious evening.

Posted by: Jay at November 20, 2008 10:30 PM

I've been on Facebook for a long time, but I just found the Pajiba group last week. It's always fun to put faces to the familiar names. But it's also very, very creepy that I enjoy it so much.

Posted by: Snath at November 20, 2008 11:51 PM

one of my favorite covers is nina simone doing "here comes the sun". good stuff.

facebook is super creepy, but i love stalking the pajiba group and reading everyone's comments, so i guess i'm guilty of being a creep myself. someday i'll get the balls to write something on the wall (except i have to admit - you guys still intimidate me, and i've been a half-assed commenter here for a while. i never really add anything witty to the threads, just usually something lame like, "I totally agree!" or "Nina Simone does a great cover of "Here Comes the Sun!" about 9 hours after people stop commenting. SEE? JUST LIKE THIS.)

Posted by: eat my shorts at November 21, 2008 1:36 AM

Apparently omg!blog is short for omg! My eyes! I'm bliiiiiiinnnnnddd!

Posted by: Kris at November 21, 2008 2:22 AM

Sergio Mendez and Brazil 66's version of For What It's Worth (Buffalo Springfield)
Siouxie and the Banshees' version of The Passenger (Iggy Pop)
DeVotchKa's version of With the Last Beat of My Heart (Siouxie and the Banshees)
Ray Charles' version of Eleanor Rigby (Beatles)
Hot 8 Brass Band's version of Sexual Healing (Marvin Gaye)
t.A.T.u.'s version of How Soon is Now? (The Smiths)
Easy Star Allstars w/ Toots and the Maytals' version of Let Down (Radiohead)
The Breeders' version of Happiness is a Warm Gun (Beatles)

But perhaps the best covers of all time are done by this dude named Matthew Taylor. He does Pixies songs as though they were being covered by other artists. they're fucking brilliant versions. here's the list:

Hey as if done by Prince
Wave of Mutilation as if done by the Bee Gees
Levitate Me as if done by the Beach Boys (this one's my fave)
Monkey Gone to Heaven as if done by Frank Sinatra
Mr. Grieves as if done by Bob Marley
No. 13 Baby as if done by Elvis
River Euphrates as if done by Tina Turner
Vamos as if done by Jimi Hendrix

Posted by: causaubon at November 21, 2008 2:40 AM

I was so happy to see The Sundays on that cover list! Weirdly, I was listening to their version earlier today and thinking about how much more I like it than the original. Others:

Stereophonics - Nothing Compares To You (Right up there with the Sinead O'Connor version)
Pixies - Wild Honey Pie (Just awesome)
Ben Folds - Bitches Ain't Shit
Travis - Baby One More Time

And I have to admit to loving Facebook. Though I wish there was a more emphatic way to reject people than "Ignore friend request". There was this guy in my secondary school who I HATED, and the feeling was absolutely mutual. We argued over everything and, at absolute best, would occasional hit "vague cordiality". He's tried five times over the past two years to add me - I don't know if he keeps seeing my name and forgetting that I keep not clicking "Accept", or if the crushing rejection is so harsh that he keeps blacking it out, but either way, I figure a "Shay has rejected your friend request, and hopes you BURN IN HELL, YOU IGNORANT LITTLE SHIT" would help the message sink in a little better.

Posted by: Shay at November 21, 2008 9:00 AM

OK Jay, now I'm just jealous. I've only seen Blur at Roseland, which wasn't the best venue for them. I don't think I was there for the opening act either.

Posted by: Cindy at November 21, 2008 10:07 AM

Mike Ness is a rock god of covers. See Social Distortion covering Ring of Fire and Mike Ness covering The Devil and Mrs Jones.

Posted by: amanda at November 21, 2008 11:12 AM

Good call on the White Stripes' Death Letter, Jay. I also like their St. James Infirmary.

How about Comboy Junkies' Sweet Jane, and Stevie Ray Vaughan's Little Wing and Voodoo Chile?

It's pretty obscure, but the Chicago Line Blues Band's version of Shimmy Shimmy Ko Ko Bop is outstanding. They're just really nasty and their drummer was this wild prototype for Keith Moon.

And I think we're all missing one of the greatest and most famous of all time, The Kingsmen's Louie, Louie.

Posted by: Eep at November 21, 2008 11:17 AM

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