free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 11/06/08 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

palin1106.jpg


You Can’t Make Me Say Her Name! You Just Can’t!

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | November 6, 2008 | Comments (35)

OK, I know I promised but this is the last time, unless she gets busted for seducing a teenage boy or something equally as salacious. But damn, we really dodged a bullet this week. A low-life, fame-whorey, bullet. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

Remember that Kutcher guy? Well he’s moved onto annoying the shit out of a completely new group of people who hate his stupid ass. (WIMB)

Goddamn Republicans. We can’t even count on them being sore losers so we can gloat at their misfortune. Thanks for fucking nothing. (QuizLaw)

Oh, h’okay. Here’s a bit of retroactive pissing and moaning. (PA Notes)

Hollywood has got Nazi fever! Now, now… Everyone remember, there are only so many Oscars to go around. (AgentBedhead)

Never before revealed, here is the secret formula for being the perfect fictional big-screen female scientist. (YBNBY)

Simon Cowell’s ex-girlfriend got a $9 million consolation prize for having to look at his weird nipples for six years. (Celebslam)

Ellen DeGeneres and Andersoon Cooper take part in a good old fashioned “gay off.” (omg blog)

Christopher Mintz-Plasse is planning to depart from his McLovin (I totally just typed “McLoin” — hee!) character by playing a — wait for it — different kind of geek. Oh well, at least he looks kind of hot without his glasses. (LA Times)

Without commiserating too much about how the Farrelly Brothers are planning to ruin “The Three Stooges,” Curly dream casting…. GO! (CC Insider)

Yes we can… Eat a whole buttload of effing cupcakes. (SeriousEats)

Aww, I love this. Vote on which breed of dog Obama’s “First Puppy” should be. Totally a rescue dog, right? (CuteOverload)

This is my new favorite word ever. (cityrag)

The only thing I love more than Obama winning the presidential election is funny Japanese people singing about it. (Thanks to my girl, celery!)

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


← American History X | Eloquent Eloquence 11/06/08 →



Comments

OK, I'll say her name:

BUTTHOLE!

Posted by: meaux at November 6, 2008 12:21 PM

Well it's pretty obvious that Obama'll bring the first Pitbull into the White House...

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at November 6, 2008 12:26 PM

Obama better get a rescue dog! He was in that book (that I can't remember the name of) about stopping puppy mills. It's a red book with a 3-legged poodle on the front of it. If you see anybody reading it in a bookstore, they are inevitably sobbing over it. I call dibs on being first dog dog-trainer!

Posted by: Blakemas! at November 6, 2008 12:32 PM


Hey, Seth, et.al, what's up with Pushing Daisies? Dancin' with the Has-beens was on in its slot last night, and my Tivo doesn't have any future episodes on its schedule.

I'll cry hot, pie-flavored (pumpkin) tears if it's gone.

Posted by: Drake at November 6, 2008 12:36 PM

www.hannity.com

www.glennbeck.com

They've got you covered for starters of course(again, it's the new improved 1992. If only there was as much great new British music this year!) and are certainly not as cooperatively civic-minded as tt marie.

If all the actual elected officials wanna do a soccer field handshake, though, the sooner cool new science starts happening!

You hear me?!? I want cool new science, government of mine! Read the Popular Science back issues, sometimes it's the only thing that leaves me not terrified!

Now, I'm a Bulldog man, and the irritable IHAH one wearing the pumpkin costume is basically my soulmate (cranky in orange and green!) but here my heart belongs to that Corgi. OH MY GAWD THE CORGI!!!

Also: IRINA SPALKO!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Jay at November 6, 2008 12:38 PM

Nine million would not be enough for me to endure Simon Cowell.

Just thinking about his o face gives me the dry heaves.

Posted by: twig at November 6, 2008 12:45 PM

So Palin turns out to be exactly what every person with an iota of intelligence thought she was?

You just blew my mind!

Also, I second meaux Butthole.

Posted by: admin11 at November 6, 2008 12:53 PM

It's so shocking that Butthole Palin was lying through her teeth about the whole shopping thing. Wonder what her hockey mom coalition thinks of her now.

Disappear Miss Alaska!

Posted by: Cindy at November 6, 2008 12:54 PM

Uhhhh I didn't mean meaux actual butthole but her statement of butthole. Not that there's anything wrong with meaux butthole but...umm I have to go now.

Damn you Rowles and your rectal fixations!

Posted by: admin at November 6, 2008 12:56 PM

*Disco music. The phone rings. A man says 'hello?'*

Hey, Todd. It's me. I read Pajiba Love today, 'cause ever since your wife lost the election, I've felt joy deep down inside. There's nothing really wrong with me; everything's wrong with your wife. So honey, please, come on home as soon as you can?

Posted by: Sofía at November 6, 2008 12:57 PM

"Nine million would not be enough for me to endure Simon Cowell."

Tell you what, twig, I don't swing that way, but I'd friggin' spend an hour in the dirty sack with him for one million. On live television so there's no time to edit out the sobbing. Released on DVD in time for the holidays. Bonus footage of me getting ready for the big event. You name it...

YOU HEAR THAT COWELL? I'M PAST THE LOOKING GLASS, YOU SMARMY SOMANABIDNITCH! YOU WANT A PIECE OF WHAT I'M ROCKIN'? I'VE NAMED MY PRICE! HELL, I'LL EVEN DRESS UP LIKE DEMI MOORE! LET'S GO!

Coincidentally, that offer goes for pretty much anybody. Relatives included... You know you're reading this, Aunt Janice! I see how you look at me - let's cut through the bullshit...

Posted by: Skitz at November 6, 2008 12:59 PM

Since one of the girls is allergic, I told my team kids yesterday that they should consider the breed I rescue, Italian Greyhounds. Very short hair, usually a good bet for people with allergies (but not always).

And then I thought, no, most of my dogs come into rescue because they're so hard to housetrain. And we can't have foreign heads of state squishing through stealth pee puddles in the Oval Office, can we? Though the mental image is amusing.

Posted by: Wednesday at November 6, 2008 1:07 PM

RE: CO, I voted kitten. Come on, you can totally see that man snuggling a kitten. If I could vote twice, I would also vote for rescue dog. Set a good example, leaders!

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at November 6, 2008 1:48 PM

Laughing my butthole off here, admin. Thanks for the clarification!

Posted by: meaux at November 6, 2008 1:50 PM

As an actual female scientist, the way we're represented in film pisses me off. A lot. Seems like making a character a scientist is a way imply that they're smart while actually having them act like idiots 99% of the time. Also, why the fuck isn't Scully on that list if they're counting doctors? She's way hotter than most of the women on their and had an actual believable personality.

Posted by: s. pisaster at November 6, 2008 1:50 PM

http://closingcredits.ytmnd.com/

I found this to be topical.

Posted by: Just Kyle at November 6, 2008 1:51 PM

I hope he has a big litter of Blue Dogs in the House.

Posted by: bucdaddy at November 6, 2008 1:57 PM

Best Worst female movie scientist?

Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough.

Posted by: TK at November 6, 2008 2:00 PM

I VOTE PUG!

PUG '08!

Posted by: tt_marie at November 6, 2008 2:31 PM

Pushing Daisies should be back in a couple weeks.

Posted by: amber at November 6, 2008 2:42 PM

You may think you'll never have to link to Sarah Palin again, but if they throw Ted Stevens in jail, then she gets to pick his replacement.

And guess what.

It's perfectly legal for her to pick herself.

Now that's what I call mavericky!

Posted by: Oh Henry at November 6, 2008 2:58 PM

I hope he has a big litter of Blue Dogs in the House.

Whereas Palin would have brought Red Dogs (cans) and Mad Dogs (bottles) to the White House.

Posted by: branded at November 6, 2008 3:01 PM

Obama should be the first president to clone a T-Rex and keep it as a pet. Nobody would fuck with us and everybody would want to be our friend so they could see the T-Rex.

Posted by: dave at November 6, 2008 3:03 PM

Oh Henry, I heard that, too. I'm trying to decide which would be worse - Stevens goes to jail and Palin goes to the Senate, or Bush pardons Stevens so he doesn't have to serve any jail time.

Posted by: dave at November 6, 2008 3:06 PM

Stacey, I've been on lurk-mode for the past few weeks, and this isn't relative to Pajiba Love, but I had to let you know: it's been confirmed that they're doing a sequel to the Sex and the City movie. Did anyone else know about this?

Fuck,
Fuck,
Fuck!!!

Posted by: Brie at November 6, 2008 3:08 PM

You do know Obama is a small Japanese town, right?

Posted by: KC at November 6, 2008 5:28 PM

TK I have to disagree. Tara Reid in Alone in The Dark has to be worse than Richards.

Posted by: admin at November 6, 2008 6:03 PM

Stacey, I've got sore loser silliness for you: New Facebook flair!


Once again I summon the bemused Mr. Cole: Oh Jeeee-Zusss.


Oh I can smile about it now but at the time it was terrible.

Posted by: Jay at November 6, 2008 6:07 PM

You may think you'll never have to link to Sarah Palin again, but if they throw Ted Stevens in jail, then she gets to pick his replacement.

And guess what.

It's perfectly legal for her to pick herself.

Posted by: Oh Henry at November 6, 2008 2:58 PM

Guess again, Oh Henry. Alaskans passed a referendum in 2002 specifically banning the appointment of members of Congress by the governor after Frank Murkowski (then AK Governor) selected his daughter Lisa (who is still in the US Senate) to fill the seat he vacated in order to become governor! Now they must hold a special election no matter what. Nothing will prevent SP from running in the special election, though, presuming Stevens survives the final tally and is expelled...

Posted by: Che Grovera at November 6, 2008 6:31 PM

Admin, I shall humbly defer. You are correct. Not only is Tara Reid in Alone in the Dark the worst portrayal of a scientist ever... it might actually be the worst acting ever... period.

Posted by: TK at November 6, 2008 7:27 PM

Really? Even worse than Star Wars TK?


*Ducks and covers

Posted by: admin at November 6, 2008 9:01 PM

The most illuminating thing was watching the original audition tapes. Sure, it's backwards perception, but it's almost stunning just how much better Harrison Ford and Mark Hamill were than the others (though I guess Kurt Russell's Han came fairly close). Luke's a pain in the ass, but it's a most well played pain in the ass. Seriously, look at the other candidates.

Also, Jake Lloyd acted exactly true to life. It was very strange later on when I realized 9 year old boys just are that stilted and flighty. Doesn't make for compelling drama buuuuut...the kid didn't whiff it.

And any movie series with McDiarmid, well, you can't throw a blanket over that.

Yes, yes, I know you're kidding. That's gonna stop me?

Posted by: Jay at November 6, 2008 9:19 PM

Yes, yes, I know you're kidding. That's gonna stop me?

Of course not. I just enjoy your passive aggressive nature.

Posted by: admin at November 6, 2008 10:26 PM

Those of us who are old enough to remember Jimmah Carter will have a lot of fun(?) watching the country melt down under our new Marxist rulers.
Then we will help you pick up the pieces.(If that's possible anymore.)
See you in four years.

Posted by: Paul Moore at November 8, 2008 2:16 PM

Really?

Posted by: Jay at November 8, 2008 4:31 PM