free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 10/26/07 | Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

jimmydeanbreakfastbowl.jpg

Pajiba Love

What’d you rather: breakfast edition! A heart attack in a bowl? (The Impulsive Buy) Or hog leftovers, pressed into a delicious loaf and grilled to your liking? (Special Way of Being Afraid)

ScarJo got her wisdom tooth gold plated and gave it to Ryan Reynolds. To this I say, “whatever Scarlett Johansson.” (IDLYITW)

Gavin from “Angel” got arrested for a DUI! What do you want from me, I don’t watch “Lost” okay? (Agent Bedhead)

Who’s the big winner? Huh? Dustin, that’s who. Dustin’s the big winner. (QuizLaw)

For the love of everything holy, will Renee Zellweger please eat something and lay off the botox? (The Evil Beet)

Blade Runner, bitches! (Slowly Going Bald)

Referring to your virginity as a “delicate flower” is for hippies or something. Today’s impressionable girls get hymen bling, yo! (Feministing)

Leonardo DiCaprio used to just be some loser who didn’t have sex with supermodels. Let’s all point and laugh at him! (Yeeeah!)

I don’t think Bill O’Smiley (See how I did that?) understands how gay works. Somebody should teach him a lesson, in a forceable Clockwork Orange kind of way. (DListed)

Finally, to wrap up this special edition Friday Love, here is a bittersweet remembrance of Steve Carell in his golden days on “The Daily Show” — after the jump. It was nice while it lasted, Steve!

Pajiba Love | October 26, 2007 | Comments (16)


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Comments

Pajiba Love on Friday? Is it my birthday? Thank you litely!

hymen bling

Heeeee, I love it when religious zealots unwittingly endorse prostitution. "Guard Your Diamond: Save sex for marriage for a brighter future." Really? Don't have sex so you can up your market value and marry that dreamy rich neurosurgeon instead of Ol' Hoke from down at the mill? I've heard they charge more for virgins in Thailand, too, but I doubt that the Pilgrims for Pussy Purity see the irony.

Even better, however, is that the diamond purity logo looks more like a vagina with cobwebs stretched across it. Good times!

Posted by: socalledonlycousins at October 26, 2007 4:09 PM

Personally I don't see what all the anguish is about with Blade Runner voice-over. I think is probably the best that's ever been done and it enhances the film.

Stop whining about it already.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 26, 2007 4:11 PM

For a second there I thought it was Thursday all over again. Thanks for the Love!

Posted by: SR at October 26, 2007 4:18 PM

"Carell is an overrated douchebag,"

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 26, 2007 4:36 PM

I knew it would be scrapple before I clicked the link. I learned about so many disgusting things that year I lived in Annapolis. Good times. I may have to throw some Old Bay on my turkey burger tonight just for old times' sake. I wish that was a euphemism.

Posted by: sarafrances at October 26, 2007 4:37 PM

God, the diamond=hymen ad is even MORE scary if the already over-zealous wedding industry integrates it into their marketing. Because Zales does not need to get anymore obvious about equating buying a fat rock as an exchange for sex.

I do love the Office but it is so damned uncomfortable to watch Steve Carell in that show sometimes. "sigh", Thanks for the clips.

Posted by: Rusty at October 26, 2007 4:40 PM

I've tried scrapple, and that shit is nasty.

By the way, congrats, Rowles.

Posted by: TK at October 26, 2007 4:55 PM

My "what'd you rather" scenario was hypothetical, because not only would I choose scrapple over breakfast bowl, but I would choose it over any other breakfast meat -- because I, Stacey Nosek a.k.a. litelysalted, motherfucking love scrapple.

Imagine eating something your whole life, and then finding out one day that it's basically made from animal trash. Do you stop loving it? The answer, a definitive no my friends -- absofuckinglutely not.

Posted by: Stacey at October 26, 2007 5:03 PM

Oh dear lawd, scrapple. Haggis, American style.

I totally don't get the diamond wrapped in chains symbolism. Since when did a hymen looks like a diamond? They could have at least used a ruby. That might have been a little closer to reality.

But wait, aren't diamonds not that uncommon geologically (or gemologically or whatever) speaking? That the diamond consortiums have just spun this whole myth about how valuable diamonds are when really there are other gems more rare?

Soooo, maybe the diamond is an appropriate metaphor for virginity.

I'm not sure where I was going with that one. It's been a long week and I'm not wearing my contacts.

Thanks for the Friday Love by the way!

Posted by: Alabamapink at October 26, 2007 5:05 PM

Say what you will about Seth McFarlane but that Zales diamond parody he did on Family Guy was spot on.

You know, the one where the guy gives her the ring and the music crescendoes and the female slowly descends to give him some oral satisfaction.

"she'll pretty much have to"

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 26, 2007 5:16 PM

nothing like a little love on a friday! damn, those jimmy dean bowls had sounded pretty good at first, looks like i dodged a bullet on that one!
is it wrong that i lust after steve carell even AFTER seeing "evan almighty" on the plane last week? i would even eat scrapple with he and litely. i think.

and WOOOOT-WOOOT DUSTIN!!

Posted by: bionic bunny at October 26, 2007 6:18 PM

I cannot believe that I JUST realised, after at least 2 years of dedicated readership, that Quizlaw-Dustin and Pajiba-Dustin are the same person. I'm a fucking moron.

Posted by: Nova at October 26, 2007 8:00 PM

I cannot believe that I JUST realised, after at least 2 years of dedicated readership, that Quizlaw-Dustin and Pajiba-Dustin are the same person. I'm a fucking moron.

Posted by: Nova at October 26, 2007 8:01 PM

Oh good, the double post makes me look less stupid.

*leaves*

Posted by: Nova at October 26, 2007 8:03 PM

Oh, forgot to congratulate Dustin, so, congratulations!

And sarafrances I will not hear anyone speak ill of the fine state of Maryland or that which can be associated with it. Besides, if there was no Old Bay, what the hell would there be to put on crabs? Or anything else that needs a little livening up, like scrapple? (ooooh, that is an intriguing idea...)

Posted by: Rusty at October 26, 2007 11:21 PM

Yeah, when I think about Dustin, the whole "guy behind the guy behind the guy" concept always comes to mind.

Posted by: agent bedhead at October 27, 2007 12:53 AM