Pajiba Love 10/20/08

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | October 20, 2008 | Comments (53)

As you’re probably well aware by now, Sarah Palin made an appearance on “Saturday Night Live” this weekend. But honestly? I’m so over it. I reached maximum Palin saturation about two weeks ago and I just want this fucking election to be over so I never have to post about her ever again. (QuizLaw)

I guess if someone is actually are dumb enough to pay American dollars to go to a Jessica Simpson concert, this sort of thing is par for the course. (WIMB)

It turns out David Duchovny was banging his tennis instructor. It’s like I’ve always said: people always bang the tennis instructor. Hell, sometimes even if you don’t play tennis. They’re just that sexy. (Celebitchy)

Lizzy Caplan is the latest actress to show her boobies on HBO’s “True Blood.” (Yeeeah!)

These Photoshop comedy posts are my favorite thing ever. Here are Adolescent Nerd Books remastered. (MightyGodKing)

I bet Tom Cruise totally still calls it “The Information Superhighway,” too. (AgentBedhead)

Ben Folds through Matthew Sweet, the Top 100 List 25-21. (ASWOBA)

Here are some fun facts about one of my favorite artists, Keith Haring. Another fun fact? I went to college in the town he grew up in and once met a bartender who went to high school with him. She said, and I quote, that he was “gayer than a three-dollar bill.” True story. (mental floss)

I’ve never seen anyone try harder than Katy Perry, which is why is delights me so much to see her make a flaming asshole out of herself. (Popoholic)

Being born and raised in the Philadelphia area, I cannot even imagine a world where this is what passes for a cheesesteak. No thank you, that is not someplace I would ever like to visit. (TIB)

Because it’s Monday and we’re all cranky, here’s a bunch of videos of people eating it hard on trampolines. (YBNBY)

OH MY GOD. This dog blows bubbles in a water dish. ‘Nuff said. (CuteOverload)

And for more dog comedy, here are “Jack Fucking Russell Terriers engaging in home fucking improvement with human fucking tools!” (CC Insider)

And now, the kid-friendly version of W:

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Comments

Palin's attempt at self-mockery ended up being so watered down it ceased to be funny.

"Look, she throws her hands in the air like she just doesn't care while Amy raps! Shes just like me! I'll vote for her..."

Oh democracy...

Posted by: Scott at October 20, 2008 12:20 PM

Giving that Mooose's ass media over-saturation is better than slamming her. As it turns out the Wal-Mart demo she appeals tends to be fickle and given their short attention span, they are already looking for the next "shiny thing"

She's over

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 20, 2008 12:29 PM

That entire SNL, from start to finish, sucked turds. Yeah, the rap thing was chuckalicious, but holy shit, the whole rest of it sucked balls. The fartface thing? Der. The friggin' whatever the hell it was - the guy playing in a small NY club? Retardeder than a wheelbarrow fulla drunk babies... And Palin? What the hell was the point? Especially on the news - she looked uncomfortable as hell and added absolutely nada to the whole thing. The last good thing that happened on SNL was Simpson's lip-synching oopsie - at least the musical acts are genuine... Although this last lady? The whole goddam song is the chorus... Chasing pavement indeed. You should give that up and chase down a goddam lyricist...

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 12:30 PM

Is there anybody on these here interwebs that's hosting a "What If?" party? As in what if McCain & Palin actually pull it off? As in well, I suppose there's nothing left to do but go on a horrible bender to end all benders, resulting in mass chaos, car-flipping, pooping in the pool craziness? Sleeping with your cousin, tipping over hot-dog carts, punching street performer drunkenness? If so, do you mind if me and my cousin make an appearance? I've got my own flamethrower...

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 12:36 PM

Skitz, I think my "What If" party will be quieter and more private, with enough tequila and vicodin to get me a permasleep on.

Posted by: Drake at October 20, 2008 12:47 PM

I don't get what Sarah Palin on SNL was supposed to show. That she's "one of us"? Isn't that already her entire persona?

In other news, that last tramp video really was painful as hell.

Posted by: Sabrina at October 20, 2008 12:50 PM

It's not a "What If?" party, per se, but a couple of my friends are indeed hosting an election night party. We haven't really considered the "what if?", because we don't need our heads exploding. We have so much to live for.

But booze will be drunk and Godtopus will be prayed to, that much is certain. And we will probably over-eat, in homage to all the fallen Republitards.

Posted by: Sean (Llama) at October 20, 2008 12:50 PM

Katy Perry DEFINITELY tries too hard. I'm tired of seeing her face and attempts at vintage fashion everywhere.

Posted by: Leah at October 20, 2008 1:00 PM

But who tried harder: Katy Perry or Lindsay "I'm in the hospital because I never stop 'working'" Lohan, circa Herby: Fully Loaded/walking corpse phase?

Subquestion: is it Furby or Herby?

Posted by: Sofía at October 20, 2008 1:22 PM

I don't know how you did it Skitz, but yer in my head. WTF was with that song? Kept thinking it must be over now, and she kept singing the same thing over and over.

I was also completely lost as to what SP and the campaign were trying to do with her appearance - it all made no sense. She had the most bewildered look on her face the whole time. None of it came off like she was in on the fun, so to speak. Rather it came off like she needed someone to explain the fun. If McPalin gets elected this country deserves to go down in flames.

Posted by: Cindy at October 20, 2008 1:25 PM

I believe it's Herbie. Are you from Chily? Calm down with your Y's.

There was just no reason for that dig. Certainly not to defend the dreck that was that movie.

Posted by: Sean (Llama) at October 20, 2008 1:26 PM

"I kissed a Girl and I liked It" was originally about a goat, it was to be the first interspecies erotica song ever given wide release.

For obvious reasons it was changed to a more Wal-Mart "friendly" title and lyrics. Of course,
the obvious reason was PETA.

True Story

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 20, 2008 1:29 PM

Skitz, there are plenty of "what if" parties going on. They are all in countries that are not named The United States of America. Just invite yourself and then decide if you ever really want to go home.

Also, persons equipped with their own flamethrowers or any permutation of a Murder weapon get free drinks.

Posted by: Admin11 at October 20, 2008 1:37 PM

Thank you Skittums, I was wondering if I was the only person who thought she just looked uncomfortable. Obviously the rationale for her appearance was the thought that she could neutralize the strength of the satire by appearing on the show and that might have worked if she had been more involved, but the two sketches came across as so carefully negotiated by "her people" as to what she would and wouldn't do that it just made her look like the teacher who comes to the end of term student party hoping to look cool to the students but ends up looking awkward and in the way.

Posted by: PaddyDog at October 20, 2008 1:38 PM

Well then, Admin11, save me a seat and make sure the bar's fully stocked. I've got a weird, sinking feeling in my gut for some reason... I'm hopeful, but then again, I was hopeful four years ago... Regardless, I'll need booze to make it through the next two weeks.

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 1:41 PM

All the Mavericks in the House Throw your Hands Up!
All the Plumbers in the House Pull Your Pants Up!

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at October 20, 2008 1:42 PM

Ack! What happened? My Pajiba died! Is anyone else getting Black Screen and No article! Help me! I can't live like this.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at October 20, 2008 1:48 PM

It would seem there's jiggery pokery going on.

Posted by: Jay at October 20, 2008 1:50 PM

Dear. God.

It's the end times people. Everything's black on this end. What the hell's going on...?

Hullo?

All right, I'm gonna need everyb... SETTLE DOWN, GODDAMMIT! All right, everybody needs to remove their clothes - put your clothes in a pile off to the left here, and put your wallets, valuables, and cash in a pile on the right... LET'S MOVE PEOPLE! NO TIME TO ASK QUESTIONS - YOU JUST NEED TO TRUST ME HERE!

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 1:54 PM

Pajiba has flatlined!!

Hold me, Optimus!

Posted by: Sofía at October 20, 2008 1:55 PM

Maybe I should take up instructing tennis. Hm.

I think I'd like to read that Feist novel.

Oh, Katy Perry. I keep hearing about that, but I hadn't seen it until now. Heh. Does that mean she's going to go away now? Or at least that one song she has?

I can't even watch the trampoline videos. I'm so disturbed that those things are still legal, yet in some states adults are required by law to wear helmets while bicycling. Really? Really!? (Actually, I just get really disturbed by people hurting themselves. I don't even know why. I giggle when it's mild, but beyond that I'm kind of a baby.

Huh, my Pajiba window is doing strange things.. all the ads are spread all out at the top during "preview comment". Weirdness...

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at October 20, 2008 1:56 PM

Pajiba has flatlined!!

Hold me, Optimus!

Posted by: Sofía at October 20, 2008 1:57 PM

Or maybe even pokery jiggery...

Posted by: PaleoLithchick at October 20, 2008 1:57 PM

Maybe I should take up instructing tennis. Hm.

I think I'd like to read that Feist novel.

Oh, Katy Perry. I keep hearing about that, but I hadn't seen it until now. Heh. Does that mean she's going to go away now? Or at least that one song she has?

Huh, my Pajiba window is doing strange things.. all the ads are spread all out at the top during "preview comment". Weirdness...

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at October 20, 2008 1:57 PM

Yeah... It's dark. And I'm not sure whose finger that is, but you're more than welcome to knock it off...

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 2:00 PM

Who forgot to pay the light bill again?

Posted by: Cindy at October 20, 2008 2:42 PM

Fuck! McCain/Palin found us out! somebody ask a question quick. That should give us a good twenty minutes to get out.

Posted by: Admin11 at October 20, 2008 2:45 PM

I'll be evacuating all the females with big breasts..COME WITH SLIM IF YOU HAVE BIG TITS!

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 20, 2008 2:46 PM

Sorry Skitz. I was just trying to find the light switch.

Posted by: Admin11 at October 20, 2008 2:47 PM

fuck now i have "i kissed a girl" stuck in my head.

and not that anyone asked, but i'd totally bang david duchovny.

Posted by: eat my shorts at October 20, 2008 3:01 PM

Sofia! Calm down, you're repeating yourself! *Shakes* *In an ideal world this would be followed by an Airplane! style line of people shaking her and administering slaps *

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at October 20, 2008 3:26 PM

I'll be evacuating all the females with big breasts..COME WITH SLIM IF YOU HAVE BIG TITS!

See now, B Slim has the right idea. Not about coming with him, but rather getting the boobie talk going. People, Julie just won't pay attention unless we're talking tits. So...in the interest of staying on topic, does anyone think Palin is breastfeeding? And are hers real? Did she misappropriate the Bridge to Nowhere funds to get new boobs? If so, was ACORN involved, or did that whacky priest who helped her get elected governer convince her that bigger boobs would do it? And can women with fake boobs breastfeed? If they do, can they feel it?

Posted by: Cindy at October 20, 2008 3:33 PM

Optimus: If you love Leslie Nielsen as much as I do, I predict we'll be the next Newman/Woodward. But we could work on the name; something like Wardman/NewWood sounds good to me.

Posted by: Sofía at October 20, 2008 3:44 PM

That SNL episode did indeed suck a bowl of deep-fried ass. It seems like the writers just keep getting stupider and more vapid all the time. It was a sign of things to come when they hired on that son of a bitch from Good Burger / Kenan and Kel "fame." Dude couldn't find funny if it kicked him in the sack.

Posted by: Mattfactor at October 20, 2008 4:22 PM

It was like when mom comes down into the basement and tries to join the party. Just leave the brownies and go mom.

Posted by: Jigsy Q. at October 20, 2008 4:53 PM

I usually try to refrain from calling women disparaging names because it is a detestable act that I fully avoid. That cunt Palin fucked up my weekly getting high session by showing up on "Saturday Night Live." One would think that she and her clan would be sight seeing around New York and enjoying all of its strangeness, namely interracial dating, watching teenagers not doing Meth, and people not shooting wolves out of airplanes or helicopters.

Posted by: Pookie at October 20, 2008 6:01 PM

"human fucking tools." Boy, that brings up bad memories of my trip to the Museum of Sex last December in NYC. It was the "Kink and Action" exhibit, and let's just saw I'll never look at a dentist's chair or a tool box the same way again. *Shudder*

Posted by: Erin S at October 20, 2008 6:33 PM

that "W" trailer brought back crazy memories of those fucked up alphabet letters from "Wonder Showzen"....I expected them all to get herpes or blow each other's heads off at the end...AUUGUGH!

Posted by: alison at October 20, 2008 7:42 PM

"that son of a bitch from Good Burger / Kenan and Kel "fame." Dude couldn't find funny if it kicked him in the sack."

No. Fucking. Shit. That cat has three characters: Fat Black Lady, Fat Black Guy, and Fat Black guy who suck balls, can't do anything even remotely funny and sucks ball again... That motherfucker's about as funny as a lump on my nuts... He brings nothing to the show - the only thing I've seen him in that was even remotely

Posted by: Skitz at October 20, 2008 8:29 PM

...looks like that Dramamine and scotch cocktail Skitz has been sippin' on finally kicked in.

Posted by: Dingles at October 20, 2008 8:35 PM

I think Joe Biden should have guest starred on Californication, maybe a threesome with David Duchovny and his stepdaughter on the show....

What do you think?

Posted by: sushi at October 20, 2008 9:13 PM

The letters video was kinda lame. But I agree on the cheesesteak link, that shit looks like Canadian food or something just as boring.

Posted by: Lucas at October 20, 2008 9:54 PM

Did we forget the wooden appearance by Obama who played himself on SNL? Palin went on SNL for the same reason Marky Mark did. To show she has a sense of humor about herself. I dont recall Biden or Obama showing up to SNL to be made fun of or stand next to people who weekly mock them on live, national tv.

And Pookie, I'm guessing that seeing a cunt on tv is a usual Saturday night alone for you and the closest you've come to getting action in years so why are you so pissed off?

Posted by: JP at October 20, 2008 10:52 PM

Lucas, canadian food consists mostly of french (freedom?) fries, cheese and too much gravy...I hardly call that boring. I call that motherfucking delicious.

Posted by: popejenn at October 20, 2008 11:12 PM

Fuck you Lucas! Canadian food is not boring! We have such delicacies as; poutine, beaver tails, bannick and baby seal tenderloin served with a whiskey maple reduction! Actually....that sounds kind of good. Where's Nannook... we gots to go hunting.

Posted by: Admin11 at October 20, 2008 11:22 PM

Well, in case anyone cares, here's my humourless liberal take on the SNL Weekend Update Sarah Palin Watches a Rap Song Sketch:

Palin & Gunshots: Deafening Silence

It was the #1 most emailed post on The Smirking Chimp, whatever the fuck THAT means.

Posted by: Maryscott O'Connor at October 21, 2008 12:11 AM

And I have to agree about the Good Burger guy. Why the FUCK is he still on SNL? He smirks and simpers and cracks himself up -- whoever first said making yourself laugh is half the battle could not have BEEN more wrong. Making yourself laugh... ruins the fucking joke. At least when it's sketch comedy, dude. When it's sketch comedy, half the battle is committing FULLY to the goddamned joke. Cracking up RUINS the fucking joke.

CHRIST, I hate that guy.

Zut alors, indeed.

Posted by: Maryscott O'Connor at October 21, 2008 12:15 AM

OK, so I'm on the other side of the world and totally unable to sync with Pajiba. Shit. I'm only now coming to grips with the depth of my addiction. On the other hand, this Japanese noodle bowl is delicious. Fucking tradeoffs.

She's over

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at October 20, 2008 12:29 PM

Am I the only one who wonders what Slim's resume looks like? What other entries are on that sucker besides "astute media critic"?

Posted by: Che Grovera at October 21, 2008 7:53 AM

I can't even watch the trampoline videos. I'm so disturbed that those things are still legal, yet in some states adults are required by law to wear helmets while bicycling.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at October 20, 2008 1:57 PM

Here's why they're still legal, AVB:

"Elephants" video

Those are my kids (and my daughter's boyfriend) on the trampoline, and this video is their own creation...

Posted by: Che Grovera at October 21, 2008 8:01 AM

Che The bubbles video was cute, but I loved the Britney dancing ones. They were hilarious. Your kids rock! You must be very proud to see (in them at this age) that you have succesfully passed on the funny gene.

Posted by: Pants at October 21, 2008 9:21 AM

Thanks, Pants! Yeah, proud would be an understatement.

Which Britney video(s) did you watch? Their lip-sync of Womanizer is the featured video on Britney's new official web site. It's pretty wild, actually -- I guess the girl who put Britney's site together is from Springfield, Illinois (basically the next town over from us here on the prairie) and is a fan of their YouTube channel. Now they have almost 150,000 views in the last five days. Funny how things happen, huh?

Posted by: Che Grovera at October 21, 2008 9:45 AM

Che I just looked at their video for 'Toxic', but the 'Womanizer' one is great too. Are those your moves or is that your wife's side of the gene pool?

Posted by: Pants at October 21, 2008 10:10 AM

Are those your moves or is that your wife's side of the gene pool?

Posted by: Pants at October 21, 2008 10:10 AM

Wife. Totally. Unquestionably. This is why she makes occasional cameos in the videos and I have yet to appear. I'm trying to recall any politican I've ever seen dance well and I can't think of a single one -- thus, all I can think to say is that I dance worse than a politician (literally, not figuratively of course). I'm bad. Which in this family means that they constantly try to goad me into it at weddings and such because I make them laugh hysterically -- but even they're not so unkind as to expose me to the barbs of the internet!

Posted by: Che Grovera at October 21, 2008 4:39 PM

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