Pajiba Love 09/18/08

Obama, Jessica Simpson and NPH: Everybody Hits!

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | September 18, 2008 | Comments (64)

Here’s an interview with the perpetually awesome, stupendously stupendous, sexy motherfucker Neil Patrick Harris! (AV Club)

Jessica Simpson has the #1 album on the country music charts. That’s like winning “Curd Queen” at a Wisconsin county beauty pageant. (DListed)

Hardcore Star Wars fans give Ewan McGregor the same treatment you’d give a former one night stand you ran into — if only they knew what having a one night stand was like. Zing!!!! (WIMB)

WOOOOT! Obama is leading! Suck it, Governor Peggy Hill! (QuizLaw)

There’s a reason why God would choose to put itself into one of these creatures. Octopuses (octopi?) are fucking ammmazing! (mental floss)

Dustin isn’t the only one who hates the motherloving shit out of TMZ. And TMZ hasn’t even tried to ruin his life … Yet … (Celebitchy)

According to this quiz, my breed of liberal is “Reality-Based Intellectualist,” also known as the liberal elite. A liberal elitist on Pajiba? Surely you jest! (FightConservatives)

The Anonymous group has declared war on Sarah Palin and hacked into her personal email. I’m guessing they’re sorting through a bunch of forwards about angels and shit as we speak. (Deus Ex Malcontent)

Madonna does some unholy things with a guitar and then her ass eats it. Score! (Yeeeah!)

This is the coolest thing ever: a solid gold My Little Pony. How I loved those stupid plastic things with their big rhinestone eyes. (cityrag)

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden might have broken up. Dammit, and we didn’t even get a shitty reality show out of them first! (IDLYITW)

I know I should probably be even a little bit pissed off by these horrifically sexist Sarah Palin T-shirts… But you know? I just don’t have it in me. (Jezebel)

Here’s a mix to get your zombie-killing on with. I would say he left out “Zombie” by The Besties but I think that song is actually about making out with zombies. I know, there’s actually people who do that. Right? (ZombieForecast)

Megan Fox must be really enjoying all of Angelina Jolie’s attention she’s been getting since Angelina is off having babies and not getting photographed. (Popoholic)

Now you can know what your name would have been if Sarah Palin was your mom.
Goalie Sanka Palin, here. Thanks, Liz! (PersonalSpace)

Did I mention Obama before? Yeah? Well check this, brotha is planning it out, yo! Thanks to Kolby for the head’s up!

And your weekly dose of GYWO, because I love it. So there!

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.

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Comments

NPH: Jim Henson was the only person I ever wrote a fan letter to, ever, when I was like 7 or 8. I grew up on Sesame Street, and Fraggle Rock, and Labyrinth, and The Dark Crystal. I'm all things Muppet.

i just fell in love with NPH all over again.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 18, 2008 12:16 PM

Ok, as much as I don't agree with Sarah Palin or even like her, the sexist attacks DO bug the shit out of me. As long as it's made clear to me in any way or context that I will always be treated differently just because I was born with a vagina, I will be angry about it. That anger is not on behalf of Governor Palin, it's on behalf of myself.

My dad was saying the other night that he thinks that Barack Obama is a great public speaker but might only be a mediocre president and I looked at him and said "That's still an improvement over terrible public speaker and terrible president" and he conceded the point.

Posted by: Genny (also Rusty) at September 18, 2008 12:17 PM

*sigh* I could have been where NPH is today, if only I had attended Mark Medoff's drama camp that year. It should have been me snorting coke off the hooker's ass in Harold and Kumar...

Posted by: The Kilted Yaksman at September 18, 2008 12:23 PM

Today's Love is interactive fun! I'm also a "Reality-Based Intellectualist" and my Palin name makes me sound like a fantasy-obsessed gangsta. Perfect!

Posted by: Kolby, AKA Clip Dragon Palin at September 18, 2008 12:31 PM

I'm a Reality-Based Intellectualist too! Who would'a tunk it?

BTW, anyone interested in some humorous interactive fun should check out the Sarah Palin baby name generator. Simply type in your name, and find out what it would've been if your mother were SP as the link below:

http://politsk.blogspot.com/2008/09/sarah_13.html

I will hereby be referred to as Beretta Hockey Palin and my son is officially changing his name to Claw Washout Palin. Now if you'd excuse me, I'm off to field dress a moose and shoot some wolves from a helicopter. Suck it, elitists!

Posted by: Pudenda at September 18, 2008 12:39 PM

"Jessica Simpson has the #1 album on the country music charts. "

Do you tell me these things just to enrage me? The only list J-Simp should be at the top of is the "Morons I'd Like to Punch in the Mouth" list.

Shit like this is why country music gets a bad rap.

Posted by: TK at September 18, 2008 12:40 PM

Snaps! Should've read through all of the Pajiba Love before posting my link.

Posted by: Pudenda at September 18, 2008 12:40 PM

Ahh, Stacy. If only WERE a motherfucker. But, sadly, for all us mothers out there, he's a daddyfucker. If he were a motherfucker, I'd be all over him like ass on a hottentot.

Posted by: wsapnin at September 18, 2008 12:43 PM

*sigh* Neil Patrick Harris... *sigh*

And having listened to The Besties "Zombie Song", you're right Stacey. That song is tots about gettin' some zombie love log. And I simply REFUSE to fuck a zombie. REFUSE!!!

Posted by: Jeremy at September 18, 2008 12:48 PM

Fun fact: "hottentot" is actually considered to be pretty offensive in Southern and Southwestern Africa these days. It's an old Dutch colonial word whose definition is actually surprisingly derogatory. Check it out. I mention this not to be overly sensitive - (how the hell would anyone who wasn't South African know or care about this?)but rather just to pass on information.

Posted by: TK at September 18, 2008 12:49 PM

I guess I should preview before I post.

If only Neil Patrick Harris were a motherfucker. There, that's what I meant to say.

too much caffeine, not enough food today.

Now must drive for 8 hrs. bleh.

Posted by: wsapnin at September 18, 2008 12:50 PM

I'm a New Left Hipster (but not a hipster douchebag--please don't shoot me, Dustin!), and if I was a Palin, I'd be Crutch Camp Palin.

Nice mix, Jeremy--nice pic of Sam Roberts, too. Brightened my day. Yummy!

Posted by: meaux at September 18, 2008 12:51 PM

In other "news", I too am a Reality-Based Intellectual, and my Palin name is "Knife Pile". Which I kind of enjoy. It makes me sound totally badass: "They call her Knife Pile 'cause she sleeps on a pile of knives." I'm going to make everyone I know change my name in their cell phones right now.

Posted by: Knife Pile Palin (formerly Anna von Beaverplatz) at September 18, 2008 12:53 PM

Posted by: TK at September 18, 2008 12:49 PM

I didn't have to be South Africanian to know that shit was offensive as shit.

One more reason to end your worthless existence.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 18, 2008 12:53 PM

Hee! You've got a missing space between two entries, that made me think you were saying God had chosen to live in either Barack Obama OR Sarah Palin, and somehow we were to guess which one....

Posted by: Tammy at September 18, 2008 12:56 PM

Shit like this is why country music gets a bad rap.

95% or more of country songs and artists are terrible. That's why country music gets a bad rap.

Except for "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" and "Mama Shot the Jukebox". Those are gold.

Posted by: branded at September 18, 2008 12:57 PM

Hey now, some of us just can't divorce our emotions from hormones and feel all awkward and confused and generally uncomfortable about sex with strangers!

That said, are you seriously giving Ben Kenobi shit?! Come on!

Posted by: Jay at September 18, 2008 12:59 PM

Where do I start?

Also liberal elitist.

Madonna is gross.

Sarah Palin does NOT represent any women I know (but then again they are all liberal elitists too) so I am not offended by the sexist t-shirts. By the by Genny, you're dad is wrong. Obama would be a very good President. Also, Palin would only make it worse for women as she represents the Barbie faction more than the Steinem.

That being said, that was an awful clip ad from Obama. While he says the right things, he's clearly reading (apparently off a prompter placed to his left) and seems unconnected from the meaning of the words.

Thanks,

Quarter Granite Palin

Posted by: Duane at September 18, 2008 1:00 PM

Egad,

My children's names are Dust Chinstrap and Beans Harpoon.

What is wrong with this woman?

Posted by: Quarter Granite at September 18, 2008 1:05 PM

Maybe I AM too old for this site, because those t-shirts, even aimed at a woman I despise, infuriated me. Why is it okay to say any such thing about any woman who is not either a porn star or a Playboy bunny (or a Celebretard, I guess)? If comparable shirts were highlighted in this forum about Barack Obama, many of you would throw a fit....as would I.

Posted by: lateformyfuneral at September 18, 2008 1:11 PM

Uh... Turbine Yukon Palin? Sounds like a hot-rod potato...

Minimus, on the other hand, has been blessed with Crutch Camp Palin. Me rikey.

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 18, 2008 1:12 PM

Apparently, I'm an Eco-Avenger. I buy that.

An Eco-Avenger named Rot Pipeline Palin.

Posted by: Robert at September 18, 2008 1:12 PM

Still Hardrock Palin. Yes.

I definitely misread Hardrock the first time I saw it.

Posted by: branded at September 18, 2008 1:16 PM

Rist Rockbone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFHlJ2voJHY

Posted by: Drake Tungsten at September 18, 2008 1:20 PM

Peace Patroller.

Who gives a fuck if Madonna falls down - she may as well start getting used to it now anyway. The bigger issue is that Guy must be falling down on the job if she has to get it on with a guitar.

Posted by: CIndy at September 18, 2008 1:21 PM

And where's the Eloquence?? I'm a loser but I'm always a sucker for a countdown.

Posted by: Jay at September 18, 2008 1:26 PM

Drake, thanks for that. I just snorted a half-chewed Smartie up into my sinuses. I can't believe I managed to forget all about that.

"Big McLargeHuge!"

Posted by: Knife Pile Palin (formerly Anna von Beaverplatz) at September 18, 2008 1:27 PM

Aww, Minimus and I have the same name. How cute! (heh heh, Crutch Camp...) Yukon, though--I find it hard to believe she'd name a kid after a Canadian territory!

Unless she plans to annex it....uh oh.....

Posted by: meaux at September 18, 2008 1:28 PM

HA. I would be Wood Corps Palin.

And I'm a Working Class Warrior, apparently.

Posted by: Lizzie (greeneyed fem) at September 18, 2008 1:29 PM

I'm a social justice crusading liberal.

Posted by: anikitty at September 18, 2008 1:31 PM

GYWA rocks.

Posted by: Cindy at September 18, 2008 1:37 PM

Um, GYWO.

Posted by: Cindy at September 18, 2008 1:37 PM

Madonna needs to be more careful, she could break a hip. She needs to take some geriatric guitar fucking lessons.

Posted by: Lindsey at September 18, 2008 1:59 PM

Ok, so...

So I'm an Eco-Avenger named Cheney Wolfhound Palin?

What the fuck...?

Posted by: Trouble at September 18, 2008 2:17 PM

Hmmm, apparently I'm an eco-avenger named Crunk Petrol. Interesting.

Posted by: windowbird at September 18, 2008 2:24 PM

Did you notice how far more of the "sexist" t-shirts were from her supporters than from the ani-Palin crowd? The kind of Repugs who love Palin are all about sexism, and she's one of them. In fact let's not forget she is a former beauty pageant entrant: ergo she buys into sexism as a career-advancer. Women like Palin make it acceptable for sexism to continue. So do I feel in the slightest bit engraged on her behalf? Fuck No. She deserves every single sexist comment she receives.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 18, 2008 2:26 PM

Working Class Warrior! w00t.

But, hell, I coulda toldya that'n.

Posted by: Muzzle Mammoth Palin a.k.a. boo a.k.a. nexus 6 at September 18, 2008 2:28 PM

I think my new name gives away my kryptonite-like weakness .....

Posted by: Hunger Tallest Palin (aka gunter) at September 18, 2008 2:29 PM

Stinger Assassin Palin? That's... kind of... pretty fucking awesome, actually. Goddammit, I do not like thinking "awesome" and "Palin" in the same paragraph. I feel so dirty now.

Posted by: Sarina at September 18, 2008 2:38 PM

All the social justice crusaders in the house say whaaaaaaaaaaaat!

Posted by: Agente Provocatrice at September 18, 2008 2:45 PM

Damn You AVClub! You almost made it thru the whole NPH interview without asking "the gay question". Arrgh!

Posted by: Ciji at September 18, 2008 2:46 PM

Mounty Bat Palin...what the fuck is that.

Posted by: Admin11 at September 18, 2008 2:50 PM

I'll tell you what it is, Admin11 - Mounty Bat Palin is Palin's renegade half-brother who was kicked out of the Royal Canadian Mounties but now rides high atop a wild moose dispersing justice under the cover of night with the Aluminuminum Bat of Mediocrity!

Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at September 18, 2008 2:57 PM

Roller Texas Palin, here.

Though this sounds like the perfect name for a server/skater at Sonic.

Posted by: foursweatervests at September 18, 2008 3:17 PM

Skitt

Thanks for the definition, however the RCMP haven't ridden on moose since 1996.

Posted by: Admin11 at September 18, 2008 3:22 PM

Heehee...sorry, I can't help it, that "Bush With Lipstick" shirt made me giggle. Yes, I'm not being a good feminist right now, but I'm also still a teenager who spends most of her day being repressed and acting like a "good little girl." You've gotta give me credit, at least I read this site regularly. That's something, right?

Posted by: Erin S at September 18, 2008 3:25 PM

I'm a Reality-Based Intellectualist by the name of Drill Swollen Palin. Now is that not a great pornstar name as well, or what?

Posted by: The Kilted Yaksman at September 18, 2008 3:34 PM

New Left Hipster "Steak Leather" Palin at your service.

Mmm, steak leather.

Posted by: raindog at September 18, 2008 3:35 PM

I am apparently a Social Justice Crusader, which smacks of activism. I may be the laziest activist on the face of the planet, unless bitching about the state of the world from my barstool counts.

Posted by: thejodester at September 18, 2008 3:39 PM

I dunno. I sort of thought "The Kilted Yaksman" was just fine as a porn star name.

Posted by: PaddyDog at September 18, 2008 4:10 PM

Chop Meth Palin

I LOVE IT.

Posted by: Melody at September 18, 2008 4:14 PM

I'm a Reality-Based Intellectualist called WMD Cessna Palin.

Those sexist T-shirts are NOT OK.

Madonna reminds me of junior high school boys who would pretend to fuck with inanimate objects because it was just so darn hilarious and daring. At her age, it's awkward and pathetic. But those solid gold ponies are bitchin'.

Posted by: DeadBessie at September 18, 2008 4:36 PM

Grill Igloo Palin here. My mom hates them dang eskimos.

Posted by: ugh at September 18, 2008 4:59 PM

I'm a Working-Class Warrior, name of Dirt Bullet Palin.

fuuuuuuuuck yeah.

Posted by: firedmyass at September 18, 2008 5:30 PM

It's "octopuses." Octo is Greek. Adding -pi to it pluralizes it Latinly. It's like dogs and cats living together. It's mass hysteria.

Posted by: Mike B. at September 18, 2008 6:22 PM

Ghostbusters references are always welcome. When coupled with classics discussions, it's even better.

Posted by: Luger Otter Palin aka TK at September 18, 2008 7:42 PM

Can I just make a couple of points on some of the gleamed over topics?

1) Octopuses are freaking awesome. I am totally build robot octopuses to battle the zombie menace.

2) At this point in my life, I am not sure who I want to sex me up more: Megan Fox or NPH.

Okay, Megan, but mostly because of the boobs.

I like boobs.

Posted by: Social Justice Crusader Recoil Zoo Palin at September 18, 2008 7:48 PM

Delurking to identify myself as Ripper Shook Palin. Ripper Shook. The rap song is writing itself.

Posted by: Theora Jones at September 18, 2008 9:30 PM

P.S. Anthony Head must be in my video and he must wear leather. Oh, yes.

Posted by: Theora Jones at September 18, 2008 9:32 PM

Thank you, Anonymous.

Posted by: Lucas at September 18, 2008 10:30 PM

It's "octopuses." Octo is Greek. Adding -pi to it pluralizes it Latinly. It's like dogs and cats living together. It's mass hysteria.

It's actually octopode. Fun fact. Or something.

Posted by: Farfalina at September 18, 2008 10:38 PM

I'm glad someone cleared up "octopuses" before I had to break off some declensions in here.

Not the dative! Not the dative! The accusative!

Posted by: branded at September 18, 2008 11:08 PM

I am stealing Dirt Bullet for my new Internet name.

I know that stealing is wrong, but...Dirt Bullet. I just have to have it. Sorry.

Posted by: Jerce at September 19, 2008 1:50 AM

Jerce,

as long as you agree to acknowledge my benevolence and generosity when prompted by me in any venue. However, I reserve the right to re-name my band Dirt Bullet (or use it as an album title).

I realize these conditions are arbitrary and unenforceable, but unreasonable demands are my favorite kind.

Posted by: Dirt Bullet the 1st (firedmyass) at September 19, 2008 10:27 AM

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