free counter with statistics Pajiba Love 09/17/08 | Pajiba - Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People

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Hurricane Bush and Needlepoint Robert Downey Jr.

Pajiba Love / Stacey Nosek

Pajiba Love | September 17, 2008 | Comments (23)

Rhetorical question: what’s even scarier than finding out a category 4 hurricane is headed your way? (Deus Ex Malcontent)

Of all the celebrity-related stuff on the internet, needlepoint celebrity mugshots is pretty much the most inspired thing I’ve ever seen. Thanks, cmoody! (DCKT)

Dakota Fanning is all growns up at the premiere of the rape movie. (WIMB)

What’s the perfect thing to take the edge off financial disaster? Besides alcohol. Why, a little dude-on-dude groping, for your viewing pleasure! (QuizLaw)

Kirsten Dunst is trying to bring back the suspender… As well as looking like you slept in a dumpster. Classy! (Yeeeah!)

Pesky fart stank making you a social pariah? Not any more! And strangely, this actually kind of ties into a comment diversion we’re got running later today. (Celebitchy)

Fact: if you’re a celebrity and you write an autobiography, having the title be a pun is not just a good idea but a publisher’s requirement. (BestWeekEver)

What do you listen to when you go to your dark place? (TMITM)

I have to admit, I have no idea who Kat DeLuna is. But apparently, everyone hates her… So I’m sure I probably will too! (The Blemish)

You know who else everyone else hates? Sienna Miller. Boy, getting it on with a married father of four just doesn’t win friends like it used to, huh? (Agent Bedhead)

Dear sweet Jesus. I could care less about some shitty chicken wrap, but what I would not give on this Earth to see mano-a-mano combat between Ronald McDonald and Burger King’s King. (TIB)

“Do you feel lucky, punk? Well, do ya?” Wrong! Here are 10 frequently misquoted movie quotations. (mental floss)

Here is a thoughtful tribute to and appreciation of David Foster Wallace. (ASWOBA)

It’s never too early to start stocking up on completely retarded Christmas ornaments. OK, but I kinda like the hoagie one. (Jezebel)

Didn’t you know? Cats need antioxidants, too. (FourFour)

Thanks to reader Erin, not only for this awesome-slawsome clip, but for making me hork my hummus wrap all over the computer screen:

Pajiba Love brought to you by Stacey Nosek, who can be reached via email here.


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Comments

I hate the "name" Kat DeLuna just on principle, it's like Diablo Cody, or Jesus Christ.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at September 17, 2008 12:12 PM

Woohoo. I get pajiba loved for a third time. Yes, I am keeping track because my life has no other meaning. Stop judging me.

Posted by: cmoody at September 17, 2008 12:19 PM

I kept shifting from wheezing laughter to a deep feeling of pity for those poor goats...

Posted by: Kolby at September 17, 2008 12:37 PM

Oh, the fainting goats! I love those silly little fuckers. They are even more hilarious in person.

(And just to keep the political ball rolling, this is what I do every time Palin opens her mouth. I don't know why; I just can't help it.)

Posted by: boo at September 17, 2008 12:51 PM

Well, you know, DUH!, everybody with a copy of "Exile In Guyville" already knows what the right Dirty Harry quote is! What is wrong with people??

Posted by: Jay at September 17, 2008 1:10 PM

Rhetorical question: what's even scarier than finding out a category 4 hurricane is headed your way?

President Sarah Palin. Sorry, rhetorical questions are the most fun to answer.

Posted by: Mike R. at September 17, 2008 1:14 PM

Tom Arnold had my favorite celeb bio book title ever. I think it was "How to Lose Five Pounds in Six Years."

Posted by: twig at September 17, 2008 1:18 PM

I was enticed by Wink Martindale's autobiography. I have no idea who he is

Has it come to this?

Has it really come to this already?


Elvis Costello has a really good "Gloomy Sunday" (which seemed to score me some points in class when it was mentioned in "Good Morning Midnight", I think it was, and I knew the song and could elaborate on what the author was talking about. My mention of "Pills and Soap" alongside "A Modest Proposal" did the same thing in another class's paper. The man will take you places, liberal arts undergrads!

Posted by: Jay at September 17, 2008 1:39 PM

I wonder if I can teach my dog that goat thing. It's hilarious!

My dark place music includes Depeche Mode (Clean, Stripped) NiN (Sanctified, That's What I Get), Nitzer Ebb (Murderous, Join in the Chant)and maybe some assorted Sisters of Mercy.

Posted by: Cindy at September 17, 2008 1:45 PM

Stacey - thanks for link to the posts about the wacky ornaments. That King Tut ornament is perfect for my mom, and I never would have found it if it weren't for you and Jezebel.

Posted by: tamatha at September 17, 2008 1:48 PM

It feels so special to contribute something to Pajiba! I just love those fainting goats.

Posted by: Erin at September 17, 2008 2:00 PM

Man do I love fainting goats. They tested this on Mythbusters, and Carrie and Tory had a lot of trouble making them faint - but no one else did. They just make me giggle.

Posted by: KatSings at September 17, 2008 2:17 PM

Are they fainting? I couldn't hear the video... I thought they were playing dead or something, so I just thought it was kind of bizarre... it's way funnier if they're fainting.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 17, 2008 2:30 PM

The goats have muscles that become stiff when startled, so they fall over--they don't actually pass out. I can sympathize, as I have chronic vertigo (and let me tell you, Arrested Development fans, Lucille 2's symptoms are dead on) and fall over in much the same way when startled. Or if there's a loud noise. Or if it's dark. People react to me in much the same way too. I'm great fun at parties!

Posted by: DeadBessie at September 17, 2008 2:57 PM

People react to me in much the same way too.

I am assuming you mean that they open umbrellas at you very suddenly.

I think I'd like you at my next party, actually... I have many umbrellas.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 17, 2008 3:07 PM

There's another goat clip on YT where the lady says farmers used to put "fainters" out in the field with more expensive herds, so that if a predator attacked, the goats would, um, fall down and make themselves available for eating while the expensive animals ran for safety.

Posted by: Lauren at September 17, 2008 3:28 PM

I don't know, I kind of li-uh-i-uh-iked Kat Delu-oh-na-oh-na-oh-ma's ren-di-can-I-say ren-dishuuuuuyn of the Nashhhhhhiona-wu-a-wu-a-wu-al Annnnnnnthuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum. Thank ya.

Posted by: Fred Bronski at September 17, 2008 6:43 PM

if a predator attacked, the goats would, um, fall down and make themselves available for eating while the expensive animals ran for safety.

I don't know if they are still used this way; but yes, that is what they were bred for.

If I ever win the lottery, I will purchase a small herd of these goats so that whenever I feel like it, I can step out on the back porch and yell "BOO!" and have myself a good laugh.

Posted by: Jerce at September 17, 2008 6:46 PM

i love winston! i had a cat that loved avocados. and of course there's the buns (mentioned yesterday, i believe) that must have their 2 cheerios each morning or there is hell to pay!

as for wacky christmas ornaments? my uncle, the surgeon, who passed many years ago, collected antique bedpans, and i've collected a few myself. i have one that i painted for christmas, and it goes outside the front door during the holidays. freaks people out, but it keeps the fundamentalists away!
i wonder if a fainting goat would do the same???

Posted by: bionic bunny at September 17, 2008 7:16 PM

If I ever win the lottery, I will purchase a small herd of these goats so that whenever I feel like it, I can step out on the back porch and yell "BOO!" and have myself a good laugh.

You see? This is why I want Jerce to move in next door to me. For real.

Posted by: TK at September 17, 2008 10:06 PM

Hehehe. I'm getting two fainters in the spring (not because of this, but because I live on a farm and that was kind of a plan already). Huzzah for temporary paralysis.

Posted by: Jaci at September 18, 2008 11:15 AM

People react to me in much the same way too...

I am assuming you mean that they open umbrellas at you very suddenly.

----

I actually meant laughing and pointing and hommous snorting--umbrellas haven't as yet been employed. Although I did have a "friend" who would use a remote to kill the lights in the room when I came in, so he could watch me instantly lunge to one side and grab desperately for the wall.

Posted by: DeadBessie at September 18, 2008 11:20 AM

Ohhhh. That ain't right, yo.... Why's he gotta be so mean?

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 18, 2008 11:31 AM